Another chapter half edited

(**)

Severus groaned as something sharp stabbed into his side without mercy. He moved his hand to make it stop and it did… for a moment until it began to do it again. Someone was actually poking him.

Severus was in too much pain to allow someone to poke him as if he were a dead frog on the side of the road. Severus was feeling fire in places he did not realize existed and he didn't even remember as to why he felt like he was being cooked over a fire.

Severus opened his mouth to give whoever was poking him a tongue lashing of their life when all his memories slapped themselves into place and the reason for his pain became very vivid and very clear as he relived the horrible experience. Severus shivered as the return of the memories he could have certainly lived without caused a sort of tidal wave of information to splash into his brain.

"Holy crap!" someone screamed. Dark eyes snapped open to glare at the being that had dared to poke him and then scream in his ear in an annoyingly childish voice that grated his eardrums raw. It took a moment for his twirling vision to even out into something more likely which turned out to be a boy.

The boy was no older than six, he couldn't be, with bright blond hair and big blue eyes. He was every cliché angel's image Severus had ever seen… except he never seen an angel covered in dirt and rags. Severus looked behind the boy and saw that they were currently in a darkish alleyway.

It was a disgustingly dirty alleyway from what Severus could smell. It smelled of alcohol, blood, maggots and, what he surmised to be, piss. Severus could only pray to whatever Gods… he could only hope that none of the substances had come in direct contact of his person.

"Where… am I?" Severus rasped, forcing himself to stand to his feet. He clawed at the wall for purchase and debated holding his breath. The smells mixing around him were horrible enough to make him want to vomit—much worse than any potion he or his students ever concocted. Hell, Severus smelled better torture chambers than this alleyway. However, holding his breath might cause him to pass out and one thing he wanted to avoid was fainting into the dirty arms of the little boy that seemed intent on catching him should he fall. Severus lurched forward, holding on the filthy wall with his long, dirty nails.

"You're—you okay old man? I find you in forest while looking for food. Saved you from wolf! You sleep long!" the boy stated with grammar bad enough to make Severus wince but that was trifling compared to his current situation: he was in an unknown place. Severus stepped out of the unclean alley and it was almost like stepping into a completely different world. The land was bathed in bright sunlight that nearly blinded Severus and littered with trees and flowers. The roads were unpaved—a simple dirt and the clothing that the people wore were unfamiliar to the wizard. .

"Where am I?" Severus repeated, "How long did I… sleep?"

He looked down at the blond child and saw him close one eye and stick out a little tongue to contemplate his question. Severus looked at his hands and saw that his nails were much longer than he would ever allow them to grow. They were also absolutely filthy! Dirt and, if he wasn't mistaken, blood were caked under his nails. He had to have slept for weeks, maybe months and he also must have been attacked sometime too. Why didn't his memories provide answers for that!

"I think… five days! Yeah, I dragged you in the Village five days ago!" the boy finally exclaimed. Severus nearly fell to the ground in shock but his fall was stopped as he fell into a passing… uh… thing. What stood before Severus was not a man—it was a giant that was twice Severus' height and more than likely ten times his strength.

"And probably a quarter of my intelligence," Severus muttered to himself. The man didn't seem to hear him but Severus could already tell that he was angry long before Severus ever awoken yet the angry blue eyes turned down at him and the lips pulled into a sneer that didn't revival Severus' on a good day.

"Get off me," the man grunted, pushing Severus backwards. Well, push might have been a bit of an understatement. In the past, Severus had men that were much larger than him push him and he merely fell backwards or maybe stumbled a little. What this man did was similar but it wasn't a push or a shove. He placed his two large hands on Severus' chest and flung him.

Severus went flying backwards, his delicate body smashing into the wall several meters behind him. He heard a distinct snapping sound that he had a feeling wasn't the cracking wall behind him. It might have been related to the pain he felt in his left arm—his bone was broken in more than one place.

The wizard glared at the tall man, masking his pain rather well, and stood to his feet. This man was not going to walk away after literally throwing him backwards, Severus would be damned to Hell if he went through being bullied in his adult life. This man was going to go to a hospital unconscious and in pain or he was going to go to the morgue.

"You leave him alone!" the little boy shouted, stepping up to the large man and placing himself in direct danger. Severus opened his mouth to warn the boy away but the man knew a weaker individual when he saw one. One meaty hand picked up the dirty child and held him in the air. The blond kicked out, trying to force the bastard to release him but even if his hits did connect, they might have felt like nothing more than pillows hitting the heavily muscled stomach.

Adrenaline pumped through Severus' bloodstream as his mind registered the child in danger. It was a known fact that Severus despised children but there wasn't anything that would make him watch as one died right in front of him. Severus pulled out his wand and nearly cried as he realized that it was ruined, snapped right down the middle to the hilt. How was he going to save the child without his wand?

"Fuck my life, think Severus… something—," Severus groaned as he felt the weight of his bag. Of course he could just use a potion! Severus shoved his useless wand in his shredded pocket and opened the carrier to see that none of the potions had been damaged or stolen.

"Let me GO!" the blond cried out, tears building in the blue eyes but being held back by pure stubborn will. The bully simply raised him higher and pulled back one boulder of a fist, obviously making a show out of pounding in the face of a six year old. Severus let out a string of colorful expletives and pulled out the first potion that could help.

"Brat, cover your ears!" Severus barked. The blond stop squawking and his tanned hands slapped onto his ears just as Severus threw the glass sphere to the ground. It shattered with a loud bang and a woman burst from the glass in a gray smoke-like spirit. She raised her arms high and her mouth stretched to inhuman proportions to release a loud shriek. Glass items burst loudly around the village whilst people fell to their knees as the screech entered their eardrums and bounced painfully throughout their brain. Luckily, those that were misfortunate enough to be in the vicinity were able to cover their ears or the ears of their young, siphoning some of the pain out.

Severus was thrown backwards, once again, when the sphere broke but it didn't save him from her screeches seeing as he didn't have enough time to shield his ears. He convulsed on the ground as he received the full effect of his own invention: Shrieking Woman.

The angry man did not stand a single chance against the powerful woman's screech, falling to the ground with a loud thud and dropping the blond. He let out a keening scream that nearly matched the potion in its intensity. Every muscle in his body was tight and he wanted it to stop but he didn't know how to make it stop. So he began to die.

The blond boy fell on his back but he didn't let go of his ears as he forced himself to his feet. His blue eyes widened in horror as the stranger seized and shook on the dusty ground. He was dying! Severus' eyes rolled into the back of his head and he scratched at the ground below him in some effort to redirect the pain that was echoing throughout his body. Blood dripped from his nose, ears and mouth.

"Old man, don't die!" the boy shouted, falling to his knees. His hands were still covering his ears and he couldn't let go, he could still hear the echoing scream but it didn't hurt as much as it must have hurt the convulsing man. Tears sprung to his eyes and he laid his head on the tense, shaking chest. "What do I do!"

Severus gritted his teeth together and forced himself to look at the blond boy who was bawling something at him. He honestly wanted the boy to stop; surely he realized that Severus wasn't going to just stop being effected just because he was yelling at him. In fact, he was probably damaging his eardrums a bit more by doing so. And the way he continued to practically slam his head into his chest was not helping and he was still screaming into his torso.

Severus looked up from the boy to stare at four… things. They were men and women but they were dressed oddly and wore masks that resembled animals. They grabbed the boy and ran away with him. Severus wondered if the lad was causing them more trouble by fighting them every step without letting go of his ears. The others attacked the spectrum that Severus' potion created. 'They won't get anywhere by hitting it,' Severus noted to distract himself from the resonating pain.

One of the oddly dressed people—a man maybe?—came over to him and picked him up and began to run away from the scene. Severus could feel the pain wane the further away they got and, for that, Severus was thankful. Severus' head lolled back and he spotted the blond boy trying to run to him, fighting the one that was holding him.

He smirked as he realized that the boy was still holding his ears, the brat was still listening. Black began to lick the edges of Severus' vision; he would probably be insensible once again. Severus nearly forced a laugh through his still clenched teeth. It was amazing that he had only did his experiment one time and he already lost consciousness twice—a bloody record!

"Old MANNNNN!"

(**)

White.

Severus nearly cursed because he hated when he roused to a white world. He stared at the whiteness and pondered his situation. This white was obviously not going to go away for a minute so he might as well give some thought to what was happening.

The first thing that came to mind was that his experiment had not worked as he planned.

He did not go bypass the Fidelius and he was somewhere foreign. This was not a bad thing, all in all. There was nothing for him in Magical Europe. His admittedly short life had been surrounded by death and spying since he was eighteen.

He watched as his beautiful pieces of art—his potions—were used to kill large masses of people. He watched as an old man begged for his the life of his grandson. He watched his students nearly cause Hogwarts to be without a dungeon and first floor. He watched as a man consumed by fear of a prophecy choose his death in the form of a frightened infant that sat on a potential piece of soul and he watched as that man and all his other pieces had their souls sucked out by Dementors.

And then his watching was over. He had nothing to do, no importance in the world.

Severus was only twenty and already he was hitting a midlife crisis. He would have been forced to deal with other people's children until everyone was convinced that he wasn't a true Death Eater. Dumbledore would have to hide him in the castle until he wasn't considered a threat to anyone. Severus let out a tiny giggle that became a roaring laughter. That sentiment was the funniest thing in the world.

It was amusing because it was true! Severus was dangerous to the people around him and to himself. He had conducted research all because of the lack of mental stimulus! Many of his research happened like that. However, this particular research had the potential to locate bad people that used the charm, it also could have exposed hundreds of people trying to not die because of crazed killers.

And the research didn't have the effect that he had wanted. It did something so much more.

He was God for much longer than he wanted, he was in immense pain after, he slept for days—maybe weeks, a little blond brat saved his life from vicious wolves, he was knocked so hard into a wall that his arm and the wall cracked, he then used a highly dangerous potion that saved the brat but nearly killed him, and he was saved by weird looking animal people.

This new place was probably the best thing that ever happened to him! Severus stopped laughing and reconsidered his sarcasm.

"It's true…" Severus said with wonder in his discombobulated voice. This land, though he nearly died, was probably going to turn out everything that he needed and wanted. He could start anew and be happy and free without anyone telling him what he could and could not do.

The young Potions Master let out a joyful laugh and sprung from the imitation of a bed. This was the best thing that had ever happened to him. This was an unquestionably delightfully perfect result of doing a chancy experiment that nearly killed him and had the potential to cause mass mania.

Life was good for Severus.

(**)

"Hey… old man… you gonna wake up?" a tiny voice asked. Severus blinked as his white room vanished and was exchanged with a blue room with bright sunlight shining on him. He glared at the window five feet away his bed and the curtains yanked themselves closed as if he had personally scared them. "That was cool!"

Severus slowly turned to the left, where the shout was made, and stared at the blue eyes that were merely five centimeters from his own. His nose was meeting quite firmly with the tanned nose and he could smell that this kid probably never brushed his teeth in his life nor took a bath.

"And, pray tell, what are you doing here?" Severus inquired his voice quite thick.

"Well, I save your life. You owe me," the blond stated. Severus was actually shocked that this brat was actually… was this brat calling in a Life Debt? But he was a mere six years old, there was no way that the child even understood what that was and he didn't appear magical. Yes, Severus could feel an energy coming from him but it wasn't magical like his. It was something that Severus was familiar with but, at the moment, he couldn't remember where or how.

"I believe that you owe me. That philistine would have killed you," Severus countered, forcing himself to sit up. The blond boy pulled himself up too though he didn't have blond hair anymore. His hair was black and looked oily, that might give him the answer as to why the boy smelled bad. It looked to be some kind of tar or fish based oil in his hair.

"He did kinda knock you around. One hit and you flew. Never seen someone flew that hard," the boy stated. Severus pursed his lips and glared at the boy. The little twit was calling him weak, it was hurtful but true.

Severus did not have any physical strength to boast about. He relied on potions and his wand. Severus froze and lurched from the soft bed, a hospital bed, and ran to the black bundle that was his robes. He hoped and prayed that it was merely a dream. He begged the Gods that his mind had made up a false picture because of the knock to the bed.

"No," he whispered, falling to his knees.

The blond sat up on his knees in confusion. The man had just run from the bed like his pants were on fire and was now hunched over whatever was in his hands. The boy climbed off the bed and slowly crept over to the odd man and looked at what he was cradling. It was a stick. It wasn't very long or thick but it looked as if someone had taken a blade and simply cut it right down the middle.

"My name is Naruto you know. I just turned six. I can start the Academy! What your name?" the boy said. The man didn't move and the boy could see that tears were forming in the man's eyes as he stared at his stick. "Come on, Old Man. Don't cry, you can fix your stick and we have a lot here if you can't!"

"I am not crying you insolent brat," Severus huffed, standing up. He carefully wrapped his wand in a cloth before placing it in his bag. He would need to have it fixed as soon as possible. Until then he would have to deal without one. He looked down at the brat who was practically falling backwards to look up at him. He tried to think as to why he looked so expectant then he sighed. "My name is Snape… Severus. I am sure that I previously inquired this but you did not answer me as I recall. Where am I?"

"Konoha!" Naruto shouted. Severus' eyes widened and he fell backwards, luckily on the bed that he had walked to sometime during their talking. He stared at the boy for several minutes and snatched up the glass by the bed to gulp down the cool water.

"By Konoha… you surely do not mean Konohagakure? Village Hidden in the Leaves! Hidden Leaf Village… I transported myself to the Hidden Countries…" Severus gasped. Severus realized that his first goal had not worked but it did something amazing. The Hidden Countries were protected by ancient magic and even older Hidden magic that was called chakra. The fact that Severus' poorly done spell had broken through such a… it was amazing!

"So yeah, you gotta be my dad," Naruto said. Severus blinked, the blond… black haired brat had been talking all the time that Severus wasn't listening to him.

"What are you blathering about?" Severus demanded.

"I saved you so you owe me. I want to live with you," Naruto smiled. Severus tilted his head as he slowly digested what the boy was saying. It seemed that the boy, the one that seemed to have the Hidden Magic was actually calling a Life Debt on him but it couldn't work.

"I saved your life from that barbarian so we are even," Severus smirked. He wasn't going to allow himself to be tricked into teaching brats again. It would not happen to himself twice in his one life time.

"But I saved you twice. The ANBU were going to throw you out or kill you 'cause you don't got no papers—you're an outsider but I jumped in front of them! Then the doctors wasn't gonna help so I said you was my daddy," Naruto gestured to his filthy black hair. He folded his arms over his chest and Severus felt his soul throb lightly. The boy had him in a tight bind and, judging by that smirk, the boy knew that he had him cornered.

The young Potions Master leaned against the high stacked pillows and stared at the tanned boy. He could hardly speak as he came to the understanding that, just maybe, this was not the perfect situation. Lady Luck had spat on him once again and now he was being forced to harbor a blond, loud mouthed orphan child.

Could this get any worse?

(**)

I don't think it follows what the person had hoped to see. Sad, really

So, seeing as this is gonna be Sarutobi-Naruto years, does anyone want to see specific couples?