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Next chappie is up, please enjoy.
Kaoru's POV
"Huh? Kaoru-san, why are you crying?" Yuki asked, looking at me with a surprised expression. I blinked at her, wondering what she was talking about. My hand travelled up my cheek to come in contact with the salty liquid, coming from my eyes.
I guess, I was really actually crying. I could feel her sad eyes on me, but I just wiped the tears away with the sleeves of my uniform. How embarrassing, the Hitachiin Kaoru was weeping in front of a complete stranger. I haven't cried in front of anyone for years, even Hikaru hasn't seen my tears in years.
"Here."
Yuki offered me a stitched white handkerchief with her initials on it. I gratefully accepted and cleaned my nose. I must have looked like a total idiot, suddenly starting to cry like this. Wasn't I stronger than that? Probably not.
"So why are you so sad?" She asked, in the most casual way possible, like it doesn't bother her that there was a high chance I would brush it off as nothing and just dodge her question. But she was different. She might be energetic like Renge and her obsession with all that anime stuff, but I can see through you wall, Makita Yuki. Your cheerfulness is from the most part from the outside, I'm not so certain what is going inside your head though.
Yuki might understand. She might have some advice. I needn't be worried about my reputation, since Yuki wasn't a guest at the Host Club, or at least I have never noticed her presence before. I felt like the biggest dork in the world, but perhaps letting some steam out, may be good for me.
"I'm in love with someone really close to me. But I know it's impossible for us to be together, since that person is in love with someone else already," I said, looking up the sky to see the white fluffy could dancing and forming into various shapes. As I looked down at the smaller girl in front of me, her expression indicated that she was nowhere near calm and collected. Actually, her eyes burnt with fury and her mouth corners went down into a very displeased frown.
"Kaoru-san, don't give up. People's feelings change and the fact that your object of affection is currently in love with someone else, doesn't mean you can't end up with that person."
She was wrong. I can't tell her that the person I love is my own twin brother. She would be disgusted with me. Yuki probably thinks it's just one of those love-triangle things you see permanently on television, but this was something different entirely. This is taboo, this should never happen, not to anyone in the world. To fall in love with your own flesh and blood and on top of that with someone who looks exactly like you is just against society rules.
"It isn't that easy, Yuki."
"It is that easy, Kaoru-san. You just want to see it as complicated. You just ha-"
"Makita-sama, please hurry up! The Anjou's are awaiting your arrival!" An old man called out, whilst running towards me and Yuki. Yuki glanced at her wrist watch and her eyes widened in shock.
"You're right! Father is going to kill me! Kaoru-san I need to go. I'll see you around," Yuki said, before dashing off with her driver to a dark blue limousine, which disappeared in the distance after a few short seconds. But what she said made me thinking.
You just want to see it as complicated.
Is it really possible for this problem to become easy to solve? Do I deceive myself in seeing this as a world ending issue rather than me finally realizing my feelings for the one I love and desire? This kind of thinking almost always got me a headache, so I decided to go home first and then break my head over this issue.
The way was quite and in an odd way really soothing, but I couldn't help, but feel that strange feeling in my stomach. Knowing that he was somewhere with someone other than me, made me feel lonely. I just sighed in pure frustration before finally arriving home, walking up the starts into my and Hikaru's room and closing the door shut.
"Oh, Kaoru? You're finally home, I have been wondering where you were," A familiar voice said, looking at me with a sleepy expression on his face. It was Hikaru. He was lying in our bed, covered in a blanket and probably taking an afternoon nap. I sat down next to him and put my hand on his, feeling the warmth spreading inside of me.
"Didn't you say, you wanted to hang out with Haruhi?"
"Yeah, I just escorted her home, no big deal," Hikaru said, wrapping his arm around me and taking me down to lie with him. I could feel his arms around my waist tighten as he snuggled even closer to me, burying his nose into my hair. My hands were on his chest and I could clearly feel and hear his slow heartbeat. As I cuddled with him I couldn't really tell if I was eternally happy or endlessly sad, since things like this made my feelings resurface. I wish Hikaru would know what these kind and loving gestures did to me, how he made my heart beat two times faster.
I just closed my eyes and fell asleep in the arms of the man that I love.
…
As I awakened, I saw that Hikaru was still sound asleep, holding my hand. I couldn't help but smile and kiss him lightly on the cheek as a small greeting. I slowly freed my hand from his tight grip and made my way with silent steps into the bathroom. I turned on the light and looked at myself in the big mirror we owned.
I and Hikaru are identical, so why can't I see him when I look at my reflection?
I averted my eyes and stripped down my clothes. Dinner would soon be served and I really needed that shower, since there was dried sweat everywhere on my body. I turned on the water and let the cold drops roll down my body. Even the maid from 10 years ago said it clearly. She said there might be no one who could tell us apart, since we're identical twins, so I did I feel so different from Hikaru? Shouldn't I at least feel a little like him, but lately I can't see Hikaru in my reflection anymore. He's my other half, the second side of the coin and still, we aren't the same anymore.
Not since we know Haruhi.
"Kaoru! Hurry up, Tono just called in inviting us to dine at his place!" Hikaru yelled, knocking on the glass shower door. I yelped in surprise that I haven't even seen him come into the bathroom. Hikaru really had no boundaries at all, he just strode into the bathroom, l knowing I was currently taking a shower.
"All right, I will be right out," I replied, turning down the water and grabbing a fresh towel the maids prepared for us, while we were sleeping, I guess. I wrapped the towel around my waist and walked out to see Hikaru changing his clothes. He seemed to have trouble picking one out.
"Hika, just take that orange one and stop destroying your brain cells over what to wear to something as ordinary like dinner," I said, walking over to his side and looking for a matching one with another color. Hikaru nodded and kissed me on the cheek as a sign of gratefulness towards me. I felt my cheeks heat up, but tried my hardest to suppress it, since how would I explain that to him if he noticed?
"You're so slow, Kaoru. I promised Tono I would drop by at Haruhi's and pick her up, since he probably has his hands full with commanding his servants on what to prepare for dinner," Hikaru complained, a slight annoyance hearable in his voice. Why Tamaki-senpai? Why have you asked Hikaru and me of all people to pick her up? Doesn't Kyoya-senpai live more in the way of Haruhi's home than we do?
"I guess, you're right. How about you take the nice limo and pick her up, I'll come then with the Audi."
"Why waste the gas when we can all go together? Seriously, Kaoru," He sighed, giving me a mischievous smirk. I smiled back at him. So he isn't entirely blinded with his Haruhi obsession. He still hasn't forgotten me. Hikaru wasn't throwing anything and anyone away for Haruhi. Thank God.
"Come on, Kao, you just complained that I break my head over what to wear yet you spend an eternity to fix your hair, which at the end looks the same anyway!" Hikaru said pulling my arm and basically dragging me out of our room and down to the gates, where our car was already waiting.
The ride with the car was dead silent, until we arrived at the Fujioka home. Hikaru jumped out of the car and dashed up the stairs to furiously knock on the door, probably eager to see Haruhi all dressed up. I sighed and decided why should I interfere, I can as well wait in the car. After a few seconds, they finally came down and got into the car. Haruhi looked normal as always, she was wearing the clothes from our club activities, since I doubt a little she has a lot of dresses she could wear.
"What do you think, Kao?"
"Huh?" I asked, confused about what was happening. I looked at Hikaru then at Haruhi and then back at Hikaru.
"Did you say something, Hika?"
"Man, you spaced out again. You know that you do that pretty often lately? I was asking you that we should take Haruhi dress, like literally, dress shopping sometime," Hikaru said, ruffling through my hair. Why? Why does his touch always make me feel so happy?
"Yeah, that would definitely be fun!" I lied. It wouldn't be any fun, since I would just feel left out and Hikaru would happily throw a million cute and or sexy outfits for her to try and I'm not really in the mood to listen to his gawking over her all the time.
"My daughter!" Tamaki's shriek voice called already from the balcony as he saw me, Hikaru and Haruhi get off of our nice Hitachiin vehicle. It seemed like Honey-senpai and Mori-senpai were already present. The only person missing was the Shadow King, who would probably arrive shortly after us. As the door to the enormous dining room opened, the first thing that happened was the Tamaki-senpai tackled Haruhi to the ground, hugging her tightly.
"Tono!" Hikaru yelled, obviously displeased with the public sign of affection towards –well- his object of affection. I wanted to grab his hand, to squeeze it and tell him to keep it down, but for some strange reason I couldn't. I wasn't able to do it.
What's going on with me? I have been feeling strange like this for quite awhile and if I'm honest, I don't really see through anymore. It's like my entire life is shrouded in a thick mist, which doesn't seem to want to go away. I'm confused and every single time I try to think about it, someone, most of the time Hikaru, interrupts my deep thinking and prolongs the process of getting this issue solved.
Before I could whine about it more a number of yells and a crashing sound interrupted my thinking, again. I looked up to see Hikaru still furiously screaming at Tamaki-senpai, who obviously paid no attention whatsoever to my brother. Mori-senpai and Honey-senpai were currently eating the dessert. They really shouldn't eat sweets before supper.
I sighed and left the room, asking a maid where the restrooms were. I needed a little time alone, at least for five minutes, before dinner would finally start. I can't wait to get home. The sooner we finish, the sooner we'll get home and I can fall asleep in Hikaru's arms like I always do.
But of course, fate as cruel as it sometimes is, decided to mess things up for me. As I came in contact with the doorknob, the bell announcing the beginning of dinner began to ring at full blast. I growled in annoyance and turned back to the dining room.
As I opened the door, I was met with the most heart-breaking sign I have ever witnessed.
Hikaru and Haruhi. He on top of her. Of course with Tamaki-senpai, almost ripping my twin's head off.
I felt goosebumps emerge on me skin and my hands started to tremble. This has never happened before. I got never overwhelmed by my feelings like this. Despite me knowing it was definitely an accident that they ended up in an awkward position like this, I still felt my body get limp and my blood boil in anger or fear, I don't even recognize the difference anymore.
Quick, before Hikaru notices that something is wrong with me. Do something, Kaoru!
"Oh! Hika is taking the initiative!" I teased.
Please, don't make me feel like this anymore.
"What's next?"
I hurts.
"Second base?"
It hurts so much, Hika.
REVIEW
A/N There might be more errors than last time, since I feel too lazy to check it right now.