I realized I'd been standing outside the green door for long enough, and knock loudly.
The hobbit I can only presume is Bilbo Baggins answers the door, and looks utterly confused and a good deal frustrated.
"Ariana, at your service." I give a slight bow.
"No, no, no I think you've got the wrong house." The hobbit insists, trying to close the door.
I dodge inside before he can, and instantly see a familiar face at the end of the hall.
"Wait, no, your at the wrong-"
"Balin!" I grin at the white haired dwarf.
"Ariana? Is that you? What are you- Oh?" Balin raises his bushy eyebrows as he realizes why I am here.
"You didn't think I'd miss THIS did you?"
"Does Thorin know your joining us?"
"Not quite.. I'm not sure he'll let me. I just came in the hope that he'll be smart enough to realize he could use my help."
Balin just smiles and pats me on the shoulder.
I hear a commotion at the front door and decide its best to avoid the annoyed hobbit, he's yelling at someone to stop wiping their feet on his mother's jewellery box, I smile to myself, the luxuries of worrying about such small things.
I help myself to some beer and lean against the wall watching the commotion, I nod hello to Dwalin as he passes me carrying some chairs, I cant wait to sit down and finally put my feet up, it took me a long time to arrive to the Shire.
I hear a familiar laugh and hold my breath... They can't be here already can they? I'd only just got here myself... I needed a moment to regain my thoughts, I decide to head to the front door to get some fresh air. As soon as I turn the corner to the hallway I bump into someone spilling my drink and stumbling backward but someone catches my arm before I make contact with the floor.
"Ariana?" He gasped.
I reluctantly peer up and see those familiar blue eyes, the familiar blonde hair, and those braids in his beard.
He looks broader than I remember, I feel so small standing next to him.
"Fili." I breathe.
"I see you still haven't found your balance since we last saw you." Kili appeared next to his brother smirking at me.
I try my best to glare at him, but his smile is so damned addictive that I end up laughing a little hysterically at him.
Fili still looks stunned but soon snaps out of it when there is a loud crash at the front door, we go to investigate and see 8 dwarves in a bundle on the floor in front of a flustered Bilbo and Gandalf standing behind them ducking his head to look inside.
As everyone piles inside I see some familiar faces and greet them accordingly, then we make our way to where Dwalin was taking the chairs, and everyone soon starts eating, drinking and laughing. I join in the reunion and sit with Kili and Fili, things have returned to normal with Kili, but I still feel some tension when I look at Fili and find him to be watching me with a strange look that I cant place.
The night progresses on with some singing and throwing of dishes, I sit and watch the spectacle in delight, it is so much more relaxing to be around dwarves than elves.
My delight soon turns into anxiety when Thorin joins us, he seems to ignore my presence while he eats and confirms what the journey is about, and making poor Bilbo faint while reading his burglary contract, while Gandalf tries to awaken the hobbit, Thorin finally turned to me and told me to follow him.
He walk's down the hallway and out the front door, I glance back at Kili and Fili who are watching us with apprehension and I follow closing the door behind me.
Thorin sits on a small bench near the front gate, looking up at the stars, I sit beside him silently and place my hands in my lap.
"I do not want you to come with us," He finally says after what seems like an eternity.
I can feel my composure cracking already.
What do I say to that? How can I convince him I will be useful? That I wont slow them down?
He has the final word, he is to be King, and whatever he says goes. What will I do if he sends me away? Would I leave? Or would I follow, hiding in the shadows, watching their backs?
"Gandalf has advised me that it would not be wise to send you away. I do not wish for you to come, I wish only the best for my kin, and you are not it."
"Thorin... I know why you do not like me, but I can't help that, I cannot change where I came from, I just-"
"Enough! The only reason I am even considering your help is because I promised your father I would watch over you, at the time I didn't realize how difficult that would be." Thorin sighs in frustration and stand up abruptly, I jump at his sudden movement.
He glares at my shock, "You are scared of me. How do you expect to go up against orcs and the other foul creatures we may come up against? You're just a small girl!
I will not have Fili and Kili risking their lives jumping in front of you in battle because you are scared and cowering in the corner! You are not a fighter." He shouts.
"I am a fighter and you know that! I can take care of myself! I will prove it. Please let me prove it, Thorin please. I have changed since you last saw me, I am better, I have been training. You know who my father was, he fought along side you many times, I have his talent, and my mothers, yes okay she is an elf and you have your reason not to like them, but she wasn't any where near Erebor when Smaug attacked... she could not help, you cannot hold her responsible, I have inherited the best traits from both sides, I am fast like an elf and strong like a dwarf! You know this, don't waste this opportunity, I want to help." I can feel my cheeks getting hot and my eyes filling with water, I look up at the sky and try to calm myself, I cant cry in front of the man I'm trying to convince that I'm strong.
He sits back down next to me and we stay silent just watching the stars.
"You may come," he pauses "but, one wrong move, and your out. Understood?"
"Understood. Thankyou Thorin." A weight had been lifted off me in that moment, I sigh in relief.
"When you have composed yourself come inside" He stands and walks back inside and I am left alone with my thoughts.
I tip my head back and smile at the stars, the cool breeze ruffles my hair. Even though I am calm now, I stay on the bench admiring the view, it may be the last moment of peace I get in a long time.
I hear Bilbo's door open and a pair of heavy feet walking down the path toward the bench I'm sitting on, I fear for a moment that it is Thorin coming back to tell me he has changed his mind.
"He didn't tell us anything, no one wanted to ask, we fear that he told you that you can't come because we heard yelling and you haven't come back inside," Fili pauses.
"I thought you were going to leave again with out saying good bye." He whispers.
My heart skips a beat and I cant help but smile a little.
"I would have said good bye, I wanted to say it last time... but I couldn't, she wouldn't let me… it killed me to have to walk away from you." I admit.
"It killed me too." There was a catch in his voice as he spoke, I glance over at him only to find him already watching me.
"I'm coming with you." I whisper as I lean my head against his shoulder.
I feel his shoulder rise and fall as he sighs.
Relief floods me when she tells me she's coming with us, will I finally be able to act on those damned feelings I've had for her since the moment I met her? She asked to join Kili and I when we were play fighting with wooden swords, Kili had teased her because she was wearing a dress calling her Princess, Thorin had yelled at Kili to be nice to her, but her father told him not to worry about her, she could handle herself, she then picked up a stick and jumped at Kili disarming him almost instantly, pushed him backwards and stood over him saying "Who's the princess now?" after watching that brave little girl, I knew she was the one.
I don't want to move, but I don't want to piss off Thorin so after a few minutes I stand up, smile at Fili, tilt my head in the direction of the door and walk towards it, I hear him follow and I smile to myself.