-2-

She thought she was hallucinating at first. Perhaps all the vodka martinis and glasses of chardonnay were finally catching up to her. What the hell was Ryan Atwood doing, standing in front of her, in her deceased mother's house while she had on only a skimpy little robe that revealed far too much? Although, the way he kept gawking at her made her feel as though she had absolutely nothing to be insecure about.

She felt a foreign feeling well up inside of her at the sound of his voice as she looked into his eyes. Her stomach clenched and she felt a tingling sensation throughout her body. It was as if blood had finally started to flow through her veins.

He looked the same, only his hair was slightly darker and he was more ruggedly handsome than ever before. This shouldn't be happening to her. His presence shouldn't have the slightest affect on her. The very thought of these feelings welling up inside her made her sick enough to want to hurl on the spot.

"What are you doing here?" she heard him ask.

"Seeing as how this isn't your house, shouldn't I be asking you that question?" she incredulously retorted.

"I uh… your mother… she uh… she hired me."

"Yes. Well, that still doesn't explain what you're doing here" she said as she narrowed her eyes, crossed her arms, and shook her head slightly.

"I need to talk to your mother about a stunt she just pulled with my workers. Where is she?"

Taylor let out a frustrated sigh as she leaned against the frame of the door. This was going to take a while. All she had was her damned luck to thank for it. "It's going to be very hard for you to complete that task seeing as how she's six feet under."

He looked at her, dumb stricken. She would have laughed but she felt like slapping him and calling a guard to have him thrown out of the house.

"I'm sorry. When did she uh...?"

"Croak? A couple of days ago" she said as she began to examine her nails.

"I'm sorry Taylor. I uh… if…"

"Don't…" Taylor stated before inhaling and exhaling sharply as she wondered why this was so hard. "It's fine" she curtly stated.

There was a silence between them that lasted no more than a few seconds but seemed to last centuries. They stared at each other before tearing their eyes away and trying to focus on any and everything else that was within sight.

"If that's all, I really should finish getting ready." Taylor said as she broke the silence and began to turn around.

"When did you…?"

Get in? "Last night" she quickly replied, not giving him a chance to finish his question.

"Are you….?"

Staying? "I don't plan to."

"When are you…?"

Leaving? "As soon as these dumb construction workers finish with the stupid renovations my mother ordered" she stated as she looked straight into his eyes, knowing that the irritation in her voice was evident. "As nice as this little chat is…" she began with a blatant lie, "I have things I need to take care of."

Taylor quickly took a step backwards into her room, shut the door, and locked it. She deeply inhaled and exhaled as she pressed her left palm against the door and her right one against her rapidly pounding heart.

"Stop it Taylor! Just stop it. You need to calm down and get a hold of yourself" she told herself with conviction.

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Ryan stared at the door dumbfounded for a moment before unconsciously placing the palm of his right hand against it. He wafted through life thinking he'd never see her again and he was okay with that. But seeing her again and knowing that she was here and in front of him killed him because she was out of reach.

He never loved anyone like he loved her. She haunted him. Despite all of his attempts, he could never be with any other woman because she was always in the back of his mind and lurking in a darkened, shallow, and unvisited corner of his heart.

All of the memories and feelings he'd tried to push out of his mind over the last fifteen years came flooding back after one small encounter with her. He had never gotten over her. He still loved her. Despite everything that happened between them, despite all of the time that had passed… he still loved her.

Looking down at the gold band on the ring finger of his left hand, he realized why he had never taken it off. He pulled his right hand away from the door and pulled the band off his finger. Holding it between his thumb and index finger, he brought the band up to his eyes and read the inscription.

Ryan & Taylor forever

It was more like never. He placed the ring back in its' rightful place and sighed before making his way through the hallway and down the stairs. It was his fault that he had to love her from afar and that the action spelled out sadness, anger, and despair for him.

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Aaron hammered away at the supporting beams of what was supposed to be a "recreation room." That old woman had given him what his grandfather would call the "heebie jeebies." He didn't even want to think about what the term "recreation" in a sly tone with a devilish grin on her face meant. It was all just TMI, or TMT (too much thinking) as his uncle Seth once put it, for him to deal with.

The hammer in his hand stopped midway as he noticed his father entering the room. He looked… well he wasn't sure how he looked. He had never seen his father look this way before. Well, he had seen his father look this way many years ago. The last time his father looked like this was… on second thought, he didn't want to revisit the last time his father looked like this.

"Dad!" Aaron called out, grabbing his father's attention and walking towards him. "Everything okay?" he asked as soon as he was close enough to his father that no one else would be able to hear their conversation.

"Huh?"

"You alright? You look kind of… strange."

"Oh no, I'm fine" his father stated as he took a hard gulp.

Aaron didn't know what to say. He knew he shouldn't push the issue. That lady probably tore into his father the same way she tore into him earlier.

"Did you know that Veronica Townsend was dead?" his father asked him.

"Yeah. That lady, her daughter, she mentioned that she had to hold a memorial service and that's why she didn't want us working on that side of the house."

His father simply nodded. "You didn't recognize her?" he asked with a puzzled look on his face.

"No. I try to steer away from crazy bitches. Remember?" he asked referring to his latest ex-girlfriend.

His father glared at him. What? Seriously? What the hell was that? Since when did his father glare at him? His uncle Seth, sure, all the time… but him? It wasn't even a "so not funny" glare… it was one of those death glares he was apparently notorious for.

"She was dressed in black from head to toe and was wearing really big sun glasses. Does that help?" he found himself saying.

"Did she mention what time the memorial service was?" he asked as he ran a hand over his face and through his hair.

"Well, half an hour ago she said it was in two hours. So, it's probably at 3" he responded as he wondered why his father kept asking questions about that woman.

"Alright, guys! Guys!" his father shouted at all the workers until he had their attention. "You can have the afternoon off. We'll pick up on this tomorrow morning." He waited a few moments for everyone to begin clearing up and putting things away. "As for you," his father directed his attention toward himself "go home, clean up, put on a suit and meet me back here at 3 for the memorial service."

"Alright dad, I'll see you at 3" Aaron said as he began to pack his things up. He knew better than to question his father and his level of sanity when he had that intense, stubborn look in his eyes.

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For the first time in years, Ryan Atwood's heart and his brain were out of sink and going a mile a minute. His brain told him told him not to do this. He should stay away. She was married to another man. She was the mother of another man's children. She hated him. What did he expect from doing this? How could he possibly persuade her to leave her life and come back to him after all this time? It wasn't just about them anymore. There were too many people involved. She was living her life and he was living his. It was too late.

His heart told him that he had to do this. He had to see her. He had to talk to her. He had to explain everything to her. He had to have her back in his life. He had to touch her. He had to hold her. Screw her husband. Her kids were old enough. The love they shared was too strong to be held back by any of that shit.

He should tell his family. Despite everything that happened in the past, she was part of their family too. He wanted the dark cloud that hung over everyone's head when they thought about her to disappear. They should know. He pulled out his cellphone as he resolved that they should be there for her too.

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Author's Note

Thank you for reviewing the first chapter of my first fanfic utasa, RebleQueen, and Azrael38. After reading your reviews I worried that I wouldn't be able to live up to your expectations – especially because I wasn't sure about exactly where I wanted the plot to end up. Hopefully I'll be able to update more frequently now that I've figured most of it out.

Hope you enjoyed… and sorry for making everyone wait so long.

At first, I didn't think reviews would matter that much… but they do… so, please review!

- Roz