Summary: Sam begins to feel the struggles of living in the big city. Artie starts his first major film project. Rachel begins to struggle to find a balance between school, Funny Girl, and work.
GUEST STARRING...
Ali Stroker as Betty Pillsbury
Lindsay Pearce as Harmony Lane
Dean Cameron as James Thomas (Acting professor)
Christopher Curry as Gunther
Will Arnett as Jay Parker (Film professor)
SPECIAL GUEST STARRING...
Demi Lovato as Dani Romano
Whoopi Goldberg as Carmen Tibideaux
Kate Hudson as Cassandra July
Sarah Jessica Parker as Isabelle Wright
ABSENT: Jacob Artist, Melissa Benoist, Blake Jenner, Jane Lynch, Matt Morrison, Alex Newell, Amber Riley, Becca Tobin, Erinn Westbrook
Song: "Our Time" from Merrily We Roll Along
INT. SPOTLIGHT DINER - TUE, SEP 2, 2014
{Rachel and Santana are working.}
Rachel: Something is stirring,
Shifting ground,
It's just begun.
Edges are blurring
All around,
And yesterday is done.
Santana: Feel the flow,
Hear what's happening:
We're what's happening.
Don't you know?
We're the movers and we're the shapers.
We're the names in tomorrow's papers.
Up to us, man, to show 'em…
INT. NYADA ROUND ROOM
{Harmony is in her freshman showcase.}
Harmony: It's our time, breathe it in:
Worlds to change and worlds to win.
Our turn coming through,
Me and you, man,
Me and you!
INT. NYADA CLASSROOM
{Blaine, Kurt, and Betty are in Acting class.}
(spoken)
Blaine: Charley, I read your two plays last night. They were so wonderful, I couldn't sleep!
Kurt: I thought you were mad. I have to tell all the people who stay over to always wake me whenever they feel that wonderful.
Blaine: Okay, this play Pretty Politics about the Senate pages. What do you think about making it into a musical?
Kurt: Go on?
Blaine: I got a better title: Take a Left.
Kurt: That's a better title?
Blaine: I think it could be important. Musicals are popular; they're a great way to state important ideas, you know: ideas that could make a difference. Charley, we could change the world!
Blaine: Feel how it quivers,
On the brink
Kurt: What?
Blaine: Everything!
Gives you the shivers,
Makes you think
There's so much stuff to sing!
And you and me,
We'll be singing it like the birds,
Me with music and you the words,
Tell 'em things they don't know!
Blaine & Kurt: Up to us, pal, to show 'em…
EXT. CENTRAL PARK
Sam & Artie: Our time, breathe it in:
Worlds to change and worlds to win.
Our turn, we're what's new,
Me and you, pal,
Me and you!
Sam: Feel the flow (Artie: feel the flow)
Both: Hear what's happening:
We're what's happening!
Long ago
All we had was that funny feeling,
Saying someday we'd send 'em reeling,
Now it looks like we can!?
Artie: Someday just began…
EXT. STREET
{Rachel and Santana clock out of work and head home.}
Rachel & Santana: It's our heads on the block.
Give us room and start the clock.
Our time coming through,
Me and you, pal,
Me and you! [2x]
INT. NYADA CLASSROOM
(spoken)
Betty: Am I too late?
Blaine: Oh, no, not at all! It's just about now.
Kurt: I'm Charley Kringas and this is Frank Shepard.
Betty: I'm Mary Flynn.
Kurt: We just took the apartment on Five.
Blaine: I'm not officially moved in until I'm discharged from the army next week.
Kurt: Frank just took a weekend pass to help us move in. A lot to move in: a typewriter, two mattresses, and a piano.
Betty: Are you the one playing the piano the last two days?
Blaine: We're evicted.
Betty: Oh. No! You're wonderful! Sincerely, wonderful!
Blaine: Well I'm sincerely grateful.
Kurt: We'd better look now; it's supposed to be right now.
Blaine: You see anything?
Kurt: I hope we didn't miss it… It should come right… THERE! There it is!
Betty: I see it!
Blaine: Where?
Betty: There it is.
Blaine: Where?
Betty: There!
Blaine: It's just phenomenal.
Betty: Phenomenal.
Blaine: Don't you wish it was ours?
Kurt: It's everybody's.
Betty: Do you call it Spuht-Nik, or Spoot-Nik?
Kurt: I call it 'Miracle of God!'
Blaine: Do you guys realize that after this moment, this moment, that the three of us are sharing here together, we are going to be able to do anything? I mean, anything we've EVER dreamed of. What a time to be starting out. What a time to be alive!
Blaine: Something is stirring,
Shifting ground?
It's just begun.
Kurt & Betty: Edges are blurring
All around,
And yesterday is done.
Blaine: Feel the flow,
Hear what's happening:
Betty: We're what's happening.
Kurt & Betty: Don't you know?
We're the movers and we're the shapers.
We're the names in tomorrow's papers.
Up to us now to show 'em?
All: It's our time, breathe it in:
Worlds to change and worlds to win.
Our turn coming through,
Me and you, pal,
Me and you!
Blaine, Kurt, Betty:
Years from now,
We'll remember and we'll come back,
Buy the rooftop and hang a plaque:
This is where we began,
Being what we can.
ALL
It's our heads on the block,
Give us room and start the clock.
Our dreams coming true,
Me and you, pal,
Me and you!
Kurt: Me and you!
Blaine: Me and you!
Artie: Me and you!
Sam: Me and you!
Santana: Me and you!
Rachel: Me and you!
Harmony: Me and you!
The NYADA students and faculty gave Harmony a round of applause. All eyes darted to Madam Tibideaux.
"Beautiful rendition, Ms. Lane," she said. "Welcome to NYADA."
Harmony beamed. Rumor had it that one student was always booted out of the musical theatre program on the first day, but she had made it through!
EXT. CENTRAL PARK
"Artie, you have to try these hot dogs," Sam said excitedly, handing one to Artie after he arrived at the bench. "Dude, look, they drench it right through the bun with all that ketchup, and mustard, and relish, it's like a delicious wiener rainbow."
"Yeah, not so appetizing," Artie sighed, setting his hot dog on Sam's lap. "How much did those cost?"
"Dunno," Sam said through a full mouth. "Like… $20?"
"Sam, aren't you on a budget?" Artie asked.
Sam stopped eating quickly. "I guess you have a point."
"Dude, I know you're new in New York, but you did great last year working as a busboy at Breadstix and working at Burt Hummel's tire shop and you even helped assistant coach the football team, and I'm sure you would've helped the Glee Club out too if only they qualified as a club with twelve members," Artie said consolingly.
"Yeah, it sucks that the program was cancelled," Sam sighed.
"Well, Glee Club landed in a bit of a funk. Maybe one day twelve kids will be interested again, but Vice Principal Sylvester wasn't about to fund a non-competitive Glee Club with seven members," Artie said. "Anyway, trust me, being a Brooklyn Film Academy sophomore, I'm more familiar on how to live in the big city under a budget."
"I guess so," Sam said. "Have you heard from Tina at all?"
"She's good," Artie said. "Living the life at the California Academy of Musical and Dramatic Arts. It's good that she has Mercedes in L.A. to keep her company. She's trying to land roles in some school productions, but no such luck yet."
"Oh, that's unfortunate," Sam said. "I know Mercedes is struggling to land anything after her elimination from X-Factor."
"Same as Santana's girlfriend," Artie said. "I guess everyone's back in the normal life, still trying to make it big in the cities we're in."
"Except Rachel," Sam laughed. "Ms. 8-shows-a-week."
"Girl's insane, but hella talented," Artie laughed. "So, ready to help me move into my dorm?"
"Let's get to it!" Sam exclaimed, getting up and wheeling Artie out of the park.
INT. NYADA CLASSROOM
"Fantastic job, students," Professor James Thomas remarked, standing up and moving into the middle of his twenty students. "Welcome to Beginning Acting 1. This is a sophomore-level class designed for students who have completed our introductory drama seminars last year. I'd like to applaud Misters Anderson and Hummel along with Miss Pillsbury, who volunteered to start our first round of acting exercises with this heartfelt script from Merrily We Roll Along. Blaine, fantastic emotion in the role of Frank. I could feel that drive, the sheer emphasis on the importance of musicals, because that, students, is why we are all here, aren't we? The arts have touched our lives so much, that we come here to New York City to pursue it as a profession, and it is my honor to instruct students like you, like Betty here, who defies the odds and expectations of society, and proves that even though she might be in a wheelchair, that means nothing on your potential as an actress. And Kurt Hummel here, who showcased a very beautiful countertenor voice mixed in with truthful storytelling. Now, we won't be doing much singing in this course. This semester is all about delivering truth to the audience, to get you all out of your inhibited shells, to expand your horizons on the personas that you can and will embody, to prepare you for success in the professional world."
"Gosh, he is so inspiring," Kurt said, awestruck, to Blaine.
"I know, right?" Blaine responded. "This is going to be a great semester."
"Eh, wouldn't count on it," Betty sighed. "The reviews on ratemyprofessor-dot-com say he's cool and all, but when we get up to Shakespearean acting and classical acting, we're in for some major practical learning than this introductory stuff."
Kurt and Blaine rolled their eyes. Betty was known as the mean girl of the sophomore musical theatre majors.
"When we meet back here on Thursday, I want you all to prepare a monologue portraying an emotion that you draw from this hat," Professor James said, walking around the room.
"Anger," Betty said, drawing her emotion. "Piece of cake."
"Sadness," Kurt sighed. "As if I can't escape that emotion enough already."
"Love!" Blaine exclaimed. "My inspiration is right next to me."
"Ugh, get a room," Betty muttered, wheeling herself out of the room.
"Class dismissed!" the professor exclaimed. "Good luck with your assignments."
EXT. STREET – WED SEP 3 – DAY
Artie and Betty were rolling on the streets together.
"I am up to here with these inconsiderate people," Betty growled, weaving her wheelchair through the walking crowd.
"I guess I'm used to it already," Artie said. "Year two in New York is off to an easier start. Last year, being plagued with unfamiliarity, homesickness, physical wheelchair challenges, and all that stuff, it was hard. I almost gave up, but there's just so much to learn here."
"Dude, I'm starving," Betty said. "Do you want to get some lunch?"
"By lunch do you mean the cheapest stuff we can find off the Spotlight Diner dollar menu?" Artie laughed. "I'm in!"
INT. SPOTLIGHT DINER
"Good afternoon, Artie!" Dani exclaimed, welcoming the pair at the front desk. "Table for you two?"
"Yes, please," Artie responded.
Dani led the pair to a table in a far corner of the restaurant. Dani removed the two chairs, allowing for Artie and Betty to park themselves in.
"Your server will be right back to take your order," Dani said. "And by server, I mean Santana, but don't think that you'll be getting away with any friendly discounts."
"Okay, Dani, I got it from here," Santana laughed. "Well, well, well, if it isn't my two dear wheelchair lovers, taking New York City by storm as the invisible cripples running over peoples' toes and banging into peoples' toddlers in strollers and even, from personal experience, the painful ordeal of having your front wheels smash into my ankles and leaving me on crutches for the next week."
"Good afternoon, Santana," Artie said sarcastically.
"Let's just cut to the chase," Betty said. "I'll have some chamomile tea and a basket of your French fries."
"And I'll have a BLT with a strawberry milkshake," Artie said.
Santana wrote it all down. "Got it. Hey, Betty, have you seen the gay lovers around anywhere? I know you have classes with them. If you do see them, pass them a message from Auntie Snix: if they do not return my foot massager to my corner of the loft by tomorrow night, they shouldn't be shocked if they find that their boyfriend pillows get stolen. I don't know what kind of four-some cuddle party they think they're having in there."
"She's lovely," Betty muttered after Santana walked away.
"Yo, Trouty Mouth," Santana hollered over to Sam, who was talking to Dani at the counter. "Take this razor," she said, extracting a shaving razor from her apron pocket.
"What do I… do with it?" Sam asked.
"Go into the restroom and shave the stubble off," Santana said.
"Gunther likes his waiters clean-shaven," Dani said. "That might make or break the success of your interview."
"You'd better hurry up, because Gunther clocks in in a few minutes and you'd best be prepared," Santana said.
Sam hurried off to the bathroom.
"I'm proofreading his resume too," Dani said, consulting Sam's file. "He misspelled Breadsticks—"
"Oh, no, honey, it's really spelled with an 'x' at the end," Santana laughed.
Dani chuckled. "Okay. So busboy at Breadstix and tire fixer at Burt Hummel's Tires and Tubes?"
"Lube," Santana corrected. "What does he think he's playing at? Got any white-out? Oh, forget it, Gunther is so old-fashioned he won't do a background check on these companies."
"Order up!" Dani exclaimed, grabbing a dish of sandwiches from the kitchen. "Table six, babe."
Santana left to deliver the order, and then Sam came out of the bathroom, conveniently at the same time as Gunther entering the restaurant.
"Good afternoon, Gunther!" Dani exclaimed. "This is Sam Evans, he's applying for a job here."
"Oh, yes, yes, yes," Gunther said. "Come to the back office with me, Sam. Your hands are clean, right?"
"Oh, um, yes, sir! Sorry, your accent is incredibly hypnotic!" Sam exclaimed, slipping the razor to Dani while Gunther wasn't looking.
INT. GUNTHER'S OFFICE
Sam took a seat in the tiny little room off the kitchen.
"Tell me about yourself," Gunther said.
"Oh, well, I'm Sam Evans. I just moved here. I'm from Lima, Ohio, and I spent the last year working as a busboy and a tire mechanic at a tire shop and—"
"Good, good," Gunther interrupted, consulting Sam's resume. "You also have experience working at The Dairy Queen! Shows you're good with milkshakes and—"
"My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard!" Sam wailed in a falsetto impression of the famous song. Gunther stared at Sam. "Oh, sorry," Sam stammered. "Just… showing you my impression of Kelis Rogers…."
Gunther surveyed Sam for a few seconds. "The Spotlight Diner is full of singing waiters. Can you sing?"
"Oh yes, I was in high school Glee Club with a few of your staff – Rachel, and Santana," Sam said. "Looks like Santana and Dani are about to do it now."
INT. SPOTLIGHT DINER
Song: "Can't Remember to Forget You" by Shakira, ft. Rihanna
[Dani:]
I left a note on my bedpost
Said not to repeat yesterday's mistakes
What I tend to do when it comes to you
I see only the good, selective memory
The way you make me feel yeah, you got a hold on me
I've never met someone so different
Oh here we go
You part of me now, you part of me
So where you go I follow, follow, follow
[Chorus: Both]
Ohohohoh ohohohoh
I can't remember to forget you
Ohohohoh ohohohoh
I keep forgetting I should let you go
But when you look at me, the only memory,
Is us kissing in the moonlight
Ohohohoh ohohohoh
I can't remember to forget you
Ooooh
I can't remember to forget you
Ohohohoh ohohohoh
[Verse 2 - Santana:]
I go back again
Fall off the train
Land in his bed
Repeat yesterday's mistakes
What I'm trying to say is not to forget
You see only the good, selective memory
The way he makes me feel like
The way he makes me feel
I never see to act so stupid
Oh here we go
He a part of me now, he a part of me
[Dani:]
So where he goes I follow, follow, follow, oh
[Chorus]
[Bridge - Dani:]
I'd rob and I'd kill to keep him with me
I'd do anything for that boy
I'd give my last dime to hold him tonight
I'd do anything for that boy
[Bridge - Santana:]
I'd rob and I'd kill to keep him with me
I'd do anything for that boy
I'd give my last dime to hold him tonight
I'd do anything for that boy
[Chorus]
Sam and Gunther applauded from the kitchen.
"Two of the best of my staff," Gunther remarked. "Can you match up to that?"
"Yeah, seriously, Mr. Gunther, sir, I can totally do that!" Sam exclaimed. "I'm like, totally a better singer than Santana and Dani! I mean, no, I'm not better, but I'm not worse, unless, well—"
"You'll hear back on your hiring status by the weekend," Gunther said, retreating to his office.
Sam grinned and hurried over to Artie and Betty.
"Um, excuse you?" Betty asked as Sam pulled up a chair and took a French fry.
"This guy's totally getting hired," Sam said to himself.
INT. NYADA CLASSROOM – THU SEP 4
Rachel and nineteen other students were gathered in the classroom just as Madam Tibideaux walked through the door. "Welcome to NYADA Showcase Singers: a course offered to all music and musical theatre majors as a core elective. Unlike the freshman choir course, this senior-level course gives students the opportunity to showcase their voices in solos."
Rachel grinned excitedly at this prospect.
"This class is annually presented with the opportunity to go on a statewide tour; however, you will be missing classes. The tour will span five days starting with the Friday after Thanksgiving: we will start out here in the city, then up to the capitol city Albany, then up north to Watertown, then down to Rochester, then Buffalo," Carmen explained. "Throughout this concert series, the set lists will change to accommodate showcasing all twenty voices. Throughout the tour, each of you will get one solo, and one duet. If you are unable to make this tour, an alternative research-based assignment will be assigned. You will miss two academic days of class on the following Monday and Tuesday."
Rachel was now concerned. Five days away from home? How on Earth was she going to break the news to Sidney Greene?
"In addition, I can now officially announce the school musical that I will be producing here at NYADA: Les Miserables," Carmen revealed.
The classroom erupted into a hyped buzz. Everyone was talking about the roles they wanted to play. Rachel immediately flashed back to her Glee Club audition, when she sang 'On My Own.' How she had matured since that fateful day of her sophomore year.
"Auditions will be held in two weeks, and auditions are open to the public," Carmen said. "We want this production to be as diverse as possible, including with regards to age. We really don't want freshmen playing Valjean, Javert, and Fantine unless they can look the part. We can never go wrong with stage makeup, but all the same. Please, spread the word to those outside the NYADA community who may want to audition. I will also serve as vocal director, the choreographer will be Ms. Cassandra July of the dance department, and the director will be Jackie Villanueva, an esteemed Broadway producer and casting agent."
Of course, how could Rachel forget? Jackie was the woman administering her first Funny Girl audition.
INT. VOGUE OFFICE
Kurt usually only volunteered at the office for four hours a week, but everything Kurt was able to do in that short time, Isabelle was grateful for.
"Thanks for taking those messages for me, Kurt," Isabelle said, rifling through Kurt's notes as he sat by the phone. "These people have been trying to get in touch for me for weeks, and I could never find the time to be close to the phone. If you could just give them a call back with this time and date for the publication meeting, please do."
"Of course, Isabelle!" Kurt exclaimed, picking up the phone and dialing the number when the phone rang.
"Isabelle Wright's office, this is Kurt speaking—"
"Kurt, it's Artie."
"Oh, hey, Artie, what's up?" Kurt asked.
"Well, today in my film class, we were given an assignment: just a video that showcases your strengths and what you know," Artie explained. "So what better way than a music video? I thought I'd capture everyone around the city doing their thing, and since you're at Vogue-dot-com, I thought it'd be cool if we featured you folks in a music video—"
"Did I hear someone say music video?" Isabelle asked, walking back into the room.
"Oh yeah," Kurt said. "It's my friend Artie, he's at the Brooklyn Film Academy, so—"
"Say no more," Isabelle said, snatching the phone from Artie. "We're in. Bring your video camera to the office pronto!"
Song: "Happy" by Pharrell Williams
INT. BROOKLYN FILM ACADEMY CLASSROOM
Artie: It might seem crazy what I'm about to say
Sunshine she's here, you can take a break
I'm a hot air balloon that could go to space
Artie & Sam: With the air, like I don't care baby by the way
INT. VOGUE-DOT-COM FASHION WAREHOUSE
{Isabelle sings as her staff run around, flaunting colorful costumes.}
[Chorus: Isabelle (Kurt & Vogue staff)]
(Because I'm happy)
Clap along if you feel like a room without a roof
(Because I'm happy)
Clap along if you feel like happiness is the truth
(Because I'm happy)
Clap along if you know what happiness is to you
(Because I'm happy)
Clap along if you feel like that's what you wanna do
EXT. STREET
{Blaine dances with street dancers.}
Blaine: Here come bad news talking this and that, yeah,
Well, give me all you got, and don't hold it back, yeah,
Well, I should probably warn you I'll be just fine, yeah,
No offense to you, don't waste your time
Here's why
INT. SPOTLIGHT DINER
{The diner staff, even Gunther, dance around the restaurant.}
[Chorus: Santana w/ Dani & Spotlight Diner staff]
Dani: Hey, come on
INT. NYADA DANCE STUDIO
{Cassie dances with her Dance 101 students, including Harmony and Betty}
[Bridge: Cassie (Harmony & Betty)]
(happy)
Bring me down
Can't nothing bring me down
My level's too high
Bring me down
Can't nothing bring me down
I said (Harmony: let me tell you now)
Bring me down
Can't nothing bring me down
My level's too high
Bring me down
Can't nothing bring me down
I said
INT. NYADA CLASSROOM
{Rachel and her Showcase Singers classmates goof around in Carmen's class.}
[Chorus: Rachel w/ classmates]
INT. LOFT
{Sam sings lead with his friends backing him up in the loft}
[Chorus: Sam w/ NYC crew]
Artie: Hey, come on
EXT. STREET
{Kurt sings with street dancers.}
(happy)
Bring me down… can't nothing…
Bring me down… my level's too high…
Bring me down… can't nothing…
Bring me down, I said (let me tell you now)
INT/EXT: LOCATION MONTAGE
[Chorus 2x: Artie]
Artie: Come on
INT. LOFT – SUN SEP 6 – NIGHT
Artie showed his friends the final edited product of his music video.
"This is so cool, Artie!" Sam exclaimed. "The professor is going to love it."
"Going to love the part at the diner," Santana said. "Dani and I owned that. No one, gay or straight, can resist the sexiness of waitresses in those tight red waitress outfits, and even I have to admit the Spotlight Diner employs some of the sexiest waiters in the city."
"Well, my bit with the NYADA dance club in the streets was pretty fun," Blaine added.
"But you have to admit, my class adds the vocal dynamic," Rachel pointed out.
"Let's not argue about which scene was better," Artie said. "Bottom line is, we chose one of the most popular songs of 2014 and turned it into a symbol of happiness in the city. I can't wait to present it to the class!"
"Easy A, no doubt about it," Kurt said from the kitchen. "Okay, guys, dinner is served! Be sure to chip in $20 each for Blaine and me to go grocery shopping tomorrow."
Sam hesitated. "Can I get back to you on that? I kind of spent $20 on hot dogs earlier."
INT. NYADA DANCE STUDIO – TUE SEP 9 - DAY
Rachel stood at the doorway of Cassie's class, just as she was wrapping up instruction for Dance 101.
"You've been here a week already and you all are still dancing like itchy gorillas!" Cassie barked. "Most of you can't even touch your toes in our stretches, how am I supposed to mold you into professional performers if you can't even touch your damn toes? I am not asking you to lick your elbows!"
Rachel rolled her eyes. It really was no joke that Cassie was hard on all her students until she found those one or two gems that were worth her time.
"Class dismissed!" Cassie exclaimed, retreating to her desk.
Rachel stood aside as the class filed out.
"What a witch," Harmony muttered as she wheeled Betty out of the room.
Rachel could empathize completely. She glanced towards Cassie's desk, where she was logging grades for the day.
"Harmony, meh, C for careless effort," Cassie sighed. "Oh, hey, Fanny Brice!"
"You, uh, wanted to see me, Ms. July?" Rachel asked.
"Oh, yes," Cassie said. "The Brooklyn Film Academy student who was here last week filming my mediocre students for a Pharrell Williams music video sent me a rough cut, and I happened to stumble upon you leading your Showcase Singers class in a verse, and then I thought, 'Wow, Schwimmer is a junior already!' And I was so reminded of your fierce determination in your freshman year, that I figured I would revisit the idea to hire you as my TA, seeing as Brody graduated last year and my only other student in mind, Benjy, was cast as the lead understudy in The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time opening next month, so, you were my only option. What do you say?"
Rachel considered the idea. "I don't know, Ms. July," she said apologetically. "Along with Funny Girl, I also work twelve hours a week at the Spotlight Diner—"
"Rachel, I would only need you for four hours a week to help choreograph routines and analyze students' form. This semester, I'm teaching Dance 101, Choreography, intro to Jazz, and intro to Modern," Cassie explained. "I need a second creative mind, and I recall you were very skilled in Jazz. I need you, Schwimmer. It's $10 an hour, four hours a week."
Rachel paused. "I'll think about it."
INT. SPOTLIGHT DINER – LATE EVENING
It was almost midnight. Kurt and Blaine were working. Rachel, Sam and Artie were seated at the bar.
"Dispose of these donuts," Gunther commanded. "Someone left them in the back of the pastry shelf and they went bad this morning."
"Will do, Gunther," Kurt sighed.
"I think you should take the job, Rachel," Sam said. "It's an easy $40 a week!"
"I don't know how much more I can take," Rachel whined. "Here, look at my schedule."
SUNDAY: 1:30 – 6:30 FUNNY GIRL; 7:30 – 11:30 DINER
MONDAY: 10:00 – 10:50 MACROECONOMICS; 12:00 – 8:00 DINER
TUESDAY: 8:00 – 9:15 PERFORMANCE EDUCATION; 9:30 – 10:45 SHOWCASE SINGERS; 11:00 – 12:15 – ACTING SHAKESPEARE; 1:00 – 2:15 PIANO; 5:30 – 10:30 FUNNY GIRL
WEDNESDAY: 10:00 – 10:50 MACROECONOMICS; 12:30 – 10:30 FUNNY GIRL (2 SHOWS)
THURSDAY: 8:00 – 9:15 PERFORMANCE EDUCATION; 9:30 – 10:45 SHOWCASE SINGERS; 11:00 – 12:15 – ACTING SHAKESPEARE; 5:30 – 10:30 FUNNY GIRL
FRIDAY: 10:00 – 10:15 MACROECONOMICS; 5:30 – 10:30 FUNNY GIRL
SATURDAY: 12:30 – 10:30 FUNNY GIRL (2 SHOWS)
"Oh, easy," Artie said, consulting her schedule. "Let's say, for example, 1:00 – 3:00 on Thursday and Friday?"
"When am I supposed to do all my homework?" Rachel asked.
"Saturday? You're wide open before 12:30—"
"No!" Rachel protested. "That's my sleep-in day."
"Wait, you consider sleeping in until 11:30 to be 'sleeping in'?" Sam asked. "I don't wake up until like 1:30 on Saturdays!"
"Yes, Sam, I am well aware," Rachel said, returning to her essay on interpreting Shakespeare's Hamlet.
"Bottom line, Rachel," Kurt said, returning to the counter. "Just by doing Funny Girl you're already making like twenty times the money as the rest of us—"
"I offered to give some of it to you, Blaine, and Artie for tuition," Rachel said.
"We don't want that kind of charity, we all want to work for our own living, same as you," Blaine said.
"Well, I don't know," Rachel said. "I didn't even take Jazz Dance 1 yet and she thinks I'm TA material just because of an 'All That Jazz' vocal and dance battle we did in freshman year?"
"You did win your first dance contest at three months old, right?" Artie asked.
"Ugh!" Rachel moaned.
"Okay, Rachel, let's try this," Kurt suggested. "You give this a shot for now, and if it proves too much for you, you step aside and maybe we'll call Brody up to take back his job."
"He went back to Montana," Rachel snapped.
INT. BROOKLYN FILM ACADEMY CLASSROOM – WED SEP 10 – DAY
Artie's "Happy" music video played on the projector in his class. The video ended with Artie's closing verse. The professor, Jay Parker, shut off the video.
"Well, Mr. Abrams, that was very entertaining," he remarked.
"So you liked it?" Artie asked.
"Well…" Jay hesitated. "I'm very happy you used multiple camera angles; that made everything a lot more fun to watch with the contrast. But the whole concept of it was just too simple. What's the theme here, the message?"
"I was trying to convey that New York City can sometimes be a tough place to live, but the best we can do is 'clap along' and embrace our opportunities in the city," Artie explained.
"Okay," Jay hesitated again, taking down notes. "See, that's a fair concept. The thing is, does the viewer really have to decipher the videographer's life story to understand what's happening? The way I was watching this, I thought I was just watching a bunch of nineteen-year-old young adults dancing in different parts of the city. But, I do understand your intentions of portrayal. The recording quality itself was magnificent, but I feel like the concept was something that was too easy for you, it looks like you've done this kind of thing before. I know the assignment was to showcase what you can do, but I expected something a little more out-of-the-box, something you haven't done before, so keep that in mind for the next assignment. Your grade right now is a B-, so pretty good job!"
INT. LOFT – NIGHT
"A B-!" Artie protested to his friends.
"Dude, that's like a dyslexic's A+++!" Sam exclaimed happily.
"Okay, I'm not about to freak out about getting an Asian F like Mike would," Artie said. "But that video took some serious work! Do you know how much stuff I had to clear with NYADA and Vogue and Gunther to get all those locations and dancers? And the fact that you all came into the Brooklyn Film Academy recording studio, there was a facility usage fee that came with that."
"Well, you're just going to try harder next time," Santana said. "Look, Artie, the thing about living in this city is that your success isn't going to happen overnight. Even Rachel took a bit of an uphill climb in getting Fanny Brice."
"Hey, that just reminded me of a song!" Dani exclaimed.
"Oh my gosh, boys, we are about to get our Pentatonix up in here," Santana said. "Can any of you beat-box?"
"Oh, that's okay, I have my guitar," Dani said, pulling out her guitar.
"I'm with you, Dani," Rachel said, wheeling a keyboard out of her room. "I have to practice for my first piano assessment next Tuesday."
Song: "Royals" by Lorde
{The NYC crew sing an acoustic version of the song, with Dani on guitar and Rachel on piano. Just a simple concept of friends singing in their living room. Vocal arrangement similar to Pentatonix.}
Kurt: I've never seen a diamond in the flesh
I cut my teeth on wedding rings in the movies
Kurt & Rachel: And I'm not proud of my address,
In a torn-up town, no postcode envy
[Pre-chorus]
Blaine, Sam, Dani: But every song's like gold teeth, grey goose, trippin' in the bathroom
Blood stains, ball gowns, trashin' the hotel room,
We don't care, we're driving Cadillacs in our dreams.
Kurt, Artie, Santana: But everybody's like Cristal, Maybach, diamonds on your timepiece.
Jet planes, islands, tigers on a gold leash.
We don't care, we aren't caught up in your love affair.
[Chorus]
Blaine: And we'll never be royals (royals).
It don't run in our blood,
That kind of luxe just ain't for us.
We crave a different kind of buzz.
Santana: Let me be your ruler (ruler),
You can call me queen Bee
Blaine: And baby I'll rule, (Sam: I'll rule), (Dani: I'll rule), (Santana: I'll rule.)
Artie: Let me live that fantasy.
Kurt, Blaine, Rachel: My friends and I—we've cracked the code.
We count our dollars on the train to the party.
Kurt: And everyone who knows us (all: knows) that we're fine with this,
We didn't come from money.
[Pre-chorus]
[Chorus]
Kurt w/ Dani/Artie/Sam harmonizing: Ooh ooh oh
We're bigger than we ever dreamed,
And I'm in love with being queen.
Ooh ooh oh
Life is great without a care
We aren't caught up in your love affair.
[Chorus]
"Oh my gosh, guys, that was so good!" Dani cheered.
"I guess you guys are right," Artie said. "If at first you don't succeed, try, try again."
"And if success never comes, then at least we called it by singing a song beforehand about how we'll never be royals," Santana snickered. "Okay, it's midnight already, let's all get to bed."
INT. NYADA CLASSROOM – THU SEP 11 – DAY
"Next up for our Showcase Singers debut assignment is Ms. Rachel Berry, from the junior class," Carmen said.
Rachel grinned and went to the center of the room. "Good morning. Today, I'll be singing 'New York, New York' by Frank Sinatra.
Song: "New York, New York" by Frank Sinatra
{As Rachel sings, we see snippets of Santana and Dani working at the diner, Artie editing a video at the Brooklyn Film Academy, and Kurt serving coffee at a Vogue staff meeting.}
Start spreadin' the news, I'm leavin' today
I want to be a part of it
New York, New York
These vagabond shoes, are longing to stray
Right through the very heart of it
New York, New York
INT. LOFT
Sam and Blaine were playing video games, when Sam's phone rang. "Hello?" Sam answered.
"Good morning, Sam," Gunther said from the other end. "This is Gunther from the Spotlight Diner. I just wanted to let you know you have been hired to work full-time, forty hours a week, starting on Sunday."
Sam beamed. "Yeah! Yeah, sure! Thanks! Okay, bye, thanks, Mr. Gunther!"
Sam turned to Blaine. "I got hired!"
INT. NYADA CLASSROOM
I want to wake up, in a city that never sleeps
And find I'm king of the hill
Top of the heap
[Chorus]
These little town blues, are melting away
I'll make a brand new start of it
In old New York
If I can make it there, I'll make it anywhere
It's up to you, New York… New York
INT. NYADA DANCE STUDIO
Rachel walked into the dance studio.
"I don't care if you've been trained in ballet, Harmony," Cassie snapped. "You're in New York now. Whatever you learned in Wisconsin or wherever does not apply here. And Betty, you think you're so smart with your mouthy little attitude? One more eye-roll or mouthed 'whatever,' then you can dismiss yourself, young lady."
"Cassandra?" Rachel asked as she approached.
"Ah! Schwimmer!" Cassie greeted. "You made up your mind?"
Rachel gulped. "I'm in. I don't think I can TA with your jazz class, but this Dance 101 class, I think I can do it."
Cassie smiled. "Fantastic."
INT. NYADA CLASSROOM
New York...New York
I want to wake up, in a city that never sleeps
And find I'm a number one, top of the list
King of the hill, A number one...
[Chorus]