Authors Notes: Thanks to Gem6, Loz06 and ADAM122343 (Can you read my mind?) for the reviews.
Just a quick warning before you read this chapter, tissues may be required and it verges on an M rating towards the end (even though I tried not to be too descriptive.) Feel free to blame it on my recent obcession with Doctor Who fanfic and I'm saying no more. All mistakes are mine, this chapter hasn't been betaed at all.
- Chapter 2 -
I wake up to the sun shining through my window and hitting me in the face. I scrunch up my face in an attempt to block the penetrating rays. Realising that this isn't working, I roll over and hide my face into the warm pillow beside me, letting the gentle lub-dub sound of the heartbeat lull me back into slumber. Wait, pillows don't have heartbeats, I remember, sitting up quickly in shock. I finally realise that I am curled into Neil's chest and the heartbeat I could hear was coming from him. Relaxing slightly, I stretch languidly, before running a lazy hand along his cheekbone. He sighs in contentment, slowly opening his eyes to look into mine. "Morning!" he mumbles.
"Hey, how are you feeling?" I ask him, planting a trail of kisses down his face and then his neck, following the trail my hand made minutes earlier.
"Ok," he mumbles in reply, "all the better for seeing you," he adds pulling me into a kiss.
We continue kissing slowly for several minutes until we are interrupted by an extra weight landing on the bottom of the bed. We break apart to identify the intrusion, letting out a sigh when we realise what we've just done. It's one thing having an affair when nobody is about to know about it, but kissing in front of Neil's only son, that's asking for trouble.
"Dad!" Jake calls announcing his presence, "What ya doin'?"
"Sleeping," Neil mumbles sleepily letting out a yawn. "What do you want Jake?"
"I'm hungry?" he whines in that way only small children can.
Neil attempts to sit up, but I put an hand on his chest stopping him. "You rest, I'll start breakfast," I state, leaving no room for arguments.
He flops back down, resting his head on the pillow. I get up slowly and head for the kitchen with Jake, glad to be out of the awkward situation. I reach the kitchen and start rummaging around in the cupboards, searching for something for breakfast. What do little boys like to eat for breakfast anyway?
"I think I've got some coco pops stashed away somewhere," I say to Jake, looking for a nod of approval.
"Great, my favourite," he announces with a smile on his face.
I finally find the box of cereal and place it on the counter, before standing up and pulling 3 bowls from the top cupboard. "Do you think your dad will like coco pops too?" I ask Jake.
"Love them," Neil responds sneaking up behind me and wrapping his arms around my waist before dropping the teaspoons he's holding onto the counter.
I turn around in his arms and am about to kiss him when I remember we're not alone. I shoot him a look as if to remind him that his son his sitting at the table, barely 2 feet from us, and that he's eagerly awaiting breakfast. "Later," I whisper, as I step around him to retrieve the milk from the fridge.
He lets his arms drop to his sides, before picking up the box of cereal and pouring it into the empty dishes. I add the milk, and then we both carry the dishes to the table. I place the two dishes I'm holding onto the table before returning to the counter for the coffee. Just as I pick up the cups, the doorbell rings.
"I'll get it," Neil says, getting up from his seat beside Jake and heading for the door before I can stop him.
"Morning Sir," I hear Yvonne's voice ring from the open doorway.
Neil leads her into the kitchen and it's only then that I realise she hasn't come alone. I am grateful that they didn't turn up any earlier, because if they saw what we were doing just moments before, they would have a lot of unanswered questions.
"Morning Yvonne, Ma'am," I say, trying to appear as normal as possible, "Coffee?" I ask them.
"Sure, white, 2 sugars," Inspector Gold answers, taking a seat at the table.
A nod from Yvonne indicates that she wouldn't mind a cup either. I quickly make up the coffees before returning to my seat to find out why they're here.
"Sorry for the early wake up call," Inspector Gold apologises, "I just wanted to inform you of what's happening," she directs the last part of her statement at Neil. "We have discovered that the accident yesterday afternoon was caused by a drunk hit and run driver. A passerby managed to get the number plates and DS's Nixon and Hunter are investigating. We're hopeful that we'll catch him. In the meantime how are you doing Neil?"
"I'm ok at the moment, a little shocked maybe, but other than that I'm fine." Neil responds truthfully.
"DCI Meadows said it's up to you whether or not you feel fit enough for work today, but he recommends that you take a couple of days personal time and spend some time with your son."
"I'll think about it," Neil responds, "There was a report I was hoping to finish," he adds as an afterthought.
Neil and Inspector Gold continue their conversation and Yvonne surreptitiously drags me into the other room, quietly closing the door behind us.
"So," she starts when we're alone, "How was it with the DI in your house for the night? Did you find out any juicy gossip?"
"Yvonne," I state incredulously, "he had a rough day yesterday and your just looking for gossip. What's got into you?"
"I didn't mean it like that, I'm just curious. What was he like. Where did he sleep? That sort of thing."
I laugh at her desperate attempt to drag information from me. I'm glad she doesn't know the truth, I'd never hear the end of it. "For God's sake, he slept in the spare room, with his son," I lie carefully, "what did you expect me to say, that I jumped him the minute I got back home?"
"Your no fun, but you've gotta admit, he's not that bad looking," Yvonne sighs moodily.
We are interrupted when Neil, Inspector Gold and Jake poke their heads around the door. "We better be getting back to work," the Inspector says, indicating for Yvonne to follow her.
"See you later Andy," Yvonne says to me, as I let them out.
"See ya," I reply, before shutting the door.
I let out a sigh, glad that's over with, for now at least. I turn around to find Neil hovering in the kitchen doorway. On seeing my expression, he closes the small distance between us and pulls me to him for a comforting hug. A silent conversation passes between us, the closeness of our bodies transmitting the emotions we're feeling to each other without the need for words. He mumbles something inaudible before leading me into the kitchen to finish my now cold coffee.
"I better get ready for work," I say, getting up and heading to my bedroom.
Neil follows me silently, checking that Jake is engrossed in the TV and is not gonna follow us first. He catches me at the doorway and pulls me back into his arms for a kiss. Minutes pass with us wrapped up in each others arms. I reluctantly break the kiss, before it gets too intense, mumbling something about how I'm gonna be late for work. Neil flops down onto the bed beside me, keeping me within arms reach at all times. I reach into my wardrobe and pull out an outfit for the day.
"I was thinking of taking Jake to the hospital to see his mom today," Neil breaks through the silence, "I don't know if it's a good idea for him to see her in the state she's in though. It was a bit of a shock for me, and I deal with situations like this all the time, so I dread to think what it will do to him."
"I don't know," I say, not having a solution to his problem, "but Jake's a tough kid, I'm sure he'll get through it."
Neil hums in response, before following me through the house as I grab my things. "Look," I say to him, "I've gotta go to work, but I'll drop you off at the hospital on my way if you like. You've got a key so come back whenever you want, is there anything you want me to get from work for you?"
"Yeah, now that I think about it can you bring the blue file off the top of my desk?" he asks me handing me the key to his office door, "I can't leave Jake on his own, but there's no reason I can't finish writing up that report."
"Sure," I reply, taking the key from him, "but what will I say if anyone asks how I got the key to your office."
"Just tell them, I gave it to you to get my wallet, which I left in the top drawer," he says as an answer.
"Ok," I nod, leading the way to the door ready to leave.
Neil quickly gets Jake ready and they join me in the car. I pull out and head towards the hospital.
We arrive at the hospital 15 minutes later. "Thanks," Neil says, leaning over and giving me a quick peck, before exiting the car, "We'll see you later."
I wait until they are safely inside the hospital entrance, before driving off. I arrive at Sun Hill a few minutes later and head straight to the locker room, where Kerry and Honey are talking animatedly.
"So anyway, Yvonne saw him this this morning and said he seemed normal, as though nothing has happened," Kerry finishes her explanations.
"Who are you talking about?" I ask them already having an idea.
"The DI," Honey answers, "his wife and son were involved in an accident last night."
"Yeah, I heard," I say, not revealing anything else.
"That'll be the shock though," Honey says turning back to Kerry, "it affects people in different ways."
"Do you think he'll be in today?" Kerry voices her thoughts.
"I doubt it," I say automatically, "he's gone back to the hospital this morning."
Honey and Kerry turn their full attention to me, at the latest piece of information, "What have you heard Andy?"
"Nothing, really," I lie, "I just drove past him on my way in."
Inside I am silently thanking Yvonne and Inspector Gold for not making it public knowledge that he stayed with me last night. If it got out, I dare say the whole station would be full of speculation and rumours and that's something we just don't need right now.
The day passes slowly and I am glad when lunch break finally arrives. I make my way up to CID hoping against all hope that there's no one up there. I deliberately choose lunch break to come up, knowing that most people will be out of the office at this time. I walk straight up to Neil's office and am just about to open the door when a voice startles me. "PC Dunbar," DCI Meadows addresses me, "Inspector Gold told me you was the one who informed DI Manson of the accident."
"Yes sir," I say turning to face him anxiously.
"How is he doing?"
"Not too bad sir." I reply, "I don't think it's sunk in fully, and he's got his hands full trying to look after his son. He went back to the hospital this morning, but I guess it's a matter of time before it really hits him."
"Yes, quiet. Anyway, it's good to see everyone's pulling together at a time like this, and I'm sure he's grateful for your help. Let him know that we're all thinking about him."
"Will do sir," I say before DCI Meadows turns around and heads back to his office.
I let out a sigh, feeling nervousness creep up my spine. I turn the key in the lock and swiftly open the door, shutting it almost silently behind me. I quickly locate the folder in question, and stuff it into the stack I'm carrying, before exiting the office as silently as I entered. I pass the locker room on my way back to the canteen and deposit the file in my locker for safe keeping. I can't believe I'm smuggling case files out of the station.
The afternoon passes around even slower than this morning and I'm glad when it's time to go home. I make my way to the locker room to get changed and then, walk out to the main staff entrance with Kerry, Honey and Yvonne. We walk across the car park deep in conversation. So deep, that I don't notice the little mass of tears run up to me and wrap his arms around my legs. I subconsciously stop walking and lift him up into my arms. "Jake," I say trying to get him to focus on me, "What's the matter, what's happened, where's your dad?"
At my words, Neil comes striding towards us, his face red with dried tears. When he reaches us, he immediately pulls me into a hug, needing the comfort, totally oblivious to the fact that we're in front of the station and are being stared at by Honey, Kerry and Yvonne. Yvonne looks at us sympathetically, whilst Kerry and Honey look from me to Neil and back again totally confused by the sudden closeness and rare show of emotion from Neil's part. Neil eventually takes a step back noticing that all eyes are now fixed on us. I shoot a look at Yvonne, silently asking her to explain to Kerry and Honey, so that I can take Jake and Neil home and find out what's caused this sudden uncharacteristic display of emotion in public. I reassure her that I will explain everything tomorrow, before leading Neil over to my car and carefully settling Jake into the back. I pull away from the station car park and head straight for home knowing that Neil needs to talk about what he's been through today.
After getting in and having a quick something to eat, we settle down on the couch in the living room, almost exactly like the night before. Jake soon falls asleep, curled up between us. Silence reigns for a few minutes, before Neil finally begins explaining what happened today.
"It was horrible," he says, struggling to hold back tears, "We stayed with her all day, she seemed to be getting better, at one point it even seemed like she was gonna wake up, but ... but," Neil trails off choking back sobs, "... one of the doctors came in and said she ... there was no electrical activity in her brain. She was brain dead, there's nothing they could do. In the end they said the best thing I could do for her is ... pull the ... plug." he struggles to get the last few words out, wracked with grief.
I pull him closer to me, letting him cry into my shoulder. Crying until he had no more tears to shed. Comforting him through the pain of losing his wife. We may have been having an affair for a good 8 or 9 months and they may have unofficially separated, but that doesn't stop the pain that comes with losing someone close to you. Even though they haven't been together for a long time, she's still his wife, the mother to his child, and they did love each other at some point. Eventually Neil pulls away and goes to the bathroom to wash the tears from his face. I take the time to settle Jake into bed, knowing that the young boy needs rest and Neil's in no fit state to do anything tonight. Just as I am pulling the blankets up around Jake, Neil steps cautiously into the room. I stand up and take a few steps back, away from the bed, giving Neil the opportunity to say goodnight to his son. He kisses him lovingly on the forehead, and whispers soothing words into his ear, before turning around and walking towards me. We both stand in the doorway to the room for a few minutes, watching Jake sleep, before turning out the light, and closing the door.
I head towards my room, knowing Neil will follow me when he's ready. He catches up to me before I can even reach the door and pulls me into his arms. I turn around to face him and don't resist when he pulls me down for a kiss. We remain kissing as he walks me backwards towards my room and drops me carefully on to the bed, falling down on top of me. He continues kissing me passionately, releasing all of his conflicting emotions into his kisses. Sadness, anger, grief, shock, hope, love, he only pulls away when we both run out of air. We lie there breathless for a few minutes, struggling to regain the little oxygen there is in the room, before Neil quickly moves down and starts trailing kisses down my neck, and then along my collar bone, pushing my shirt out of the way and travelling further south. His hands leave a path down my body, his lips tracing the path slowly. We strip each other of our clothes and make love deep into the night, finally falling asleep at 3am curled up tightly in each others arms.
Author's Notes: This chapter kind of wrote itself, which makes a change. Hopefully I'll have another chapter up soon, but no promises. I'm slowly working my self out of the nasty case I've writers block, but most of my stories have just hit dead ends at the moment. On the bright side, I've typed up a couple of one shot's I've been writing on the train, which I'm hoping to post soon. So keep your eyes open for them.
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