Jun: Wow! I'm so surprised at how many comments I got from the last chapter.

A uniformed man walked casually but urgently down the dull hallways of the IFI. Institution For Insanes. ( I should totally be here )
The humming from the lights up above sounded along with his echoing footsteps. He stopped in front of one of the barred cells. He looked around to make sure no one else was there. He saluted to the inmate. " Sir, everything is going according to plan. The Millefiore and Vongola famiglia are meeting today."

In response a sickening evil laugh sounded from the depths of the cell. A figure sat on the floor strapped down in a straight jacket. His eyes were covered by his bangs so all you could see was his twisted Cheshire smile.

" Perfect. Today will be the day I finally got out of this hellhole. And what better to celebrate than to destroy the two most powerful mafia families?
Hehehehe-hahhahaha-HAHAHAHAHA!" The restrained man threw his head back laughing in insane pleasure. He took a large breath and immediately went into a mood swing. His mouth now creased into a firm line. " Push the button."

The subordinate tipped his hat. He took a black remote like object with a big red button in the middle of it out of his pocket. Letting his thumb rest on top of smooth surface of the button before pushing it with a soft click.

KaBOOM!

Spanner had his upper body in the open floor panel he had opened.

He had been perfectly fine watching his favorite TV soap opera Days of our lives when the power to the room went out.

The mechanic rummaged around threw wires. He held a chewed up piece of wire close to his face, inspecting the damaged object. " Well damn. Looks they did a good number on this one."

Seated next to Spanner on one side was Bluebell and on the other was Shoichi. " Mice again?" Bluebell asked. " Yep, seems like there was an accident and now Italy is flooded with those little rodents. But to think they would actually come this for out."

The three sat lost in their own different thoughts…except for Bluebell who was fantasizing about Tsuna.

Small pitter-pattering of tiny feet and little squeaking became audible when a little gray creature stopped in front of the Spanner. All three stared at the small creature, blinking twice. Sensing the stares the mouse stared back at them.

" Squeak."

" AAAAAAAHHHH!"

" Sqeeuuuaaak!" The mouse jumped in the air at the humans loud scream. All of it's fur stood on end.

Shoichi shot up to his feet in panic. He swiftly pulled his gun out and pointed it at the mouse which just happened to be in-between Spanner and Bluebell.
They both screamed as Shoichi madly pulling the trigger and shot the weapon over and over again sending loud booms throughout the mansion until there was another whole on the floor next to the trap door three times its size.

When Shoichi finally realized that the mouse had scurried away he stopped shooting muttering "Oh, it's gone." Spanner stood from his dive to the side and started yelling at the Musophobia. " What the hell! What do you think you're doing! Are you trying to kill us as well! Don't you know those things can hurt people! And don't you know that that thing is in med condition! Don't use it to kill mice!"

" Might I ask what you are doing out here?"

Spanner and Shoichi froze in there spots. The two seemed to animatedly turned their head like a rusted robot head over to the side to look at Tsuna.

Tsuna stood there patiently with a raised eyebrow. " Well… Is anyone going to tell me?" Tsuna said looking specifically Shoichis gun. Shoichi looked at Tsuna, then down at the gun in his hand, then back at Tsuna. He slowly hid the gun behind his back laughing nervously thinking that in some way it might help the situation. " Um… Well, Tsuna…You see-" Shoichi took a mad dash down the hall opposite of Tsuna with Spanner hot on his heals. Bluebell was staring admiringly at Tsuna the whole time.

When she didn't hear anymore yelling she looked behind her and saw that she was the only one left. Bluebell deadpanned. ' How dare those ingrates leave me!', she yelled in her mind. Tsuna looked down at her. " Is something the matter, Bluebell?" Tsuna was so close to her with a concerned look in his eyes Bluebell face became beet red. She sputtered something about having to go to the restroom before running off after the other two.

Tsuna was now left alone in the hallway. He cocked his head and an animated blue question mark appeared above his head. The butler looked at the whole in the floor then at his watch. "… I suppose I have enough time to fix this before the meeting."

With the Vongola

Giotto sat in his cushioned seat in the first class airplane along with his fellow guardians. Gokudera as his right hand man sat next to him along with Yamamoto. Mukuro and his sister Chrome sat on the opposite side of the plane. Hibari was in the cockpit scaring the pilots half to death be standing there watching them. He threatened to ' bite them to death' if they did not get them to the meeting on time. Sasagawa had fallen asleep in his chair and was snoring deeply with a bubble coming out of his nose.

The ninth, Dino, and Reborn had agreed to meet them at the meeting. Lambo was absent from the meeting dew to underage-ment… and they were afraid that he would say something stupid to intimidate the Millefiore family, and they did NOT need a war. It was the whole reason why they where going to the meeting in the first place. " Damn that Byakuran! He'd better not try anything on us or else I'll kill him!", yelled Gokudera. Mukuro laughed his weird laugh. " Kufufufu. You'd better not try that Gokudera-san. You just might be the one ending up dead." Gokudera stood up in his seat. " What did you say you pineapple!" Yamamoto tried to calm the boomer down. " Ma ma, Gokudera."

Chrome hid her face behind a magazine. " Please do not be so rash, Gokudera-san." Giotto raised an eyebrow at Mukuro. " Why are you even here. You usually stay behind and let Chrome come." Mukuro smirked. " Kufufufu. Have you not heard of the rumors? The Millefiore family have some sort of 'secret weapon'. All who it sets its eyes on it kills.
Then it leaves the victims body out in an open area for the police to find. I believe it is a warning for the people in the mafia. And coming to this meeting is the perfect opportunity to try and swindle some information about it." Giotto sighed. "Have you no morals, Mukuro." The illusionist smiled proudly. "Nope!"

Giotto sighed and rubbed his temples. " Lord help me through this."

Tsuna walked down the halls of the Millefiore mansion. " Byakuran-sama! Come out already! If you don't come out I swear I'll hunt you down and drag you to that meeting!" He called. Minutes ago he had gone to Byakurans office where he had left him and now he is gone.

The people around him weren't helping either. Shoichi ran down the hall in a giant gray cat suit carrying a gray cat. Bluebell ran after him with mouse-traps. Spanner came after both of then carrying a shovel. Once they disappeared Shoichi came running back the opposite direction with the cat now clinging to his head for dear life. Bluebell came running with the mouse traps she was holding snapped on her fingers. The mouse they were after scurried down the floor squeaking, and Spanner was running around with his hands fisted on his chest screaming like a little girl. They all spotted the mouse that was in front of Tsuna at once and dived for it.

A dark shadow seemed to cover up Tsuna's eyes. Like lightening he flew down and grabbed and mouse and dumped it in a net. Tsuna looked at the group calmly but the lightening in the background said otherwise. " Now, if you are all done playing , I would kindly suggest that you get ready for the meeting." He said growling the last part. Shivers ran down their backs as they ran off. Tsuna huffed. ' Just what did I get myself into.'

Finally Tsunas saint like patience snapped. He march down halls and stair cases. Tsuna stopped before the door he was positive Byakuran was hiding in.

The candy cellar.

He knocked three times on the door then slammed it open. Inside the candy cellar the walls lined with shelves stacked to the top with candy. Bags of cloth hung from the ceiling filled with mints, bonbons, and gum-gum drops. Over in the corner was a giant pile of marshmallow bags stacked on top of each other. And inside the stack of bags sat Byakuran in the fetal position trying to be as quiet as possible. Most people would have dismissed this but Tsuna, with his sharp eyes, could see as clear as day just who was hiding. Tsuna's shadow descended on the plastic bags. The shadow clearly three holes in it. Two narrowed eyes and one demon smile. Byakuran started shaking inside his candy fortress. " There you are, Byakuran."

Time break

Tsuna stood there sweat dropping. When he had caught Byakuran and he had to literally drag him through the whole mansion. And when he arrived at the helicopter, Byakuran latched himself onto the door frame. Shoichi, Spanner, and Bluebell were trying in vain to pull him off by his legs. Byakuran was yelling and scream all the way.

" But I don't want to go!" He yelled again.

Tsuna sighed. " Byakuran, there is nothing you can do. The meeting has been arranged either you like it or not. The Vongola are on their way and the rest of your guardians have agreed to meet us there. Now you are going to let go of that door frame right now. Or do I have to sedate you again?"

Byakuran paused to think about it. The pause was just enough to make him lose his grip of the metal. The Millefiore boss went flying into the helicopter with a yelp. The other three tumbling in after him. The all purpose butler just walked gracefully in after them. " Well…not what I had in mind, but no matter."

Nother time break

The Millefiore boss made his way down the hall with Tsuna at his side and Shoichi and Bluebell behind them. Byakuran had finally calmed down after some persuasion and blackmail. ( imagine being black mailed by your own butler )

The Vongola family was already there. At the head of the table of course was the Ninth. Next to him was Giotto and on the other side was Reborn. Next to Reborn was Dino, Chrome and Mukuro. Next to Giotto were the rest of the guardians. On the Millefiore side was Kikyo, Zakuro, Daisy, and faltered in his stride for a moment when he saw the Vongola. ' They look just like!' Tsuna shook his head. ' No. They're long gone.'

Three seats were still open. Byakuran took the head seat of his side and Shoichi and Bluebell sat in the other open chairs. Tsuna stood next to Byakuran like a shadow.

To the Vongola the first thing that they notice was that there was an adorable, innocent, ( fuckable) teenage boy in a butler suit standing loyally next to Byakuran. And of course they instantly got the wrong idea. Giotto was about to demand what the meaning of this was. Until he remembered Mukuro's warning. He Held back but he was going to bring the matter up later.

Byakuran cleared his throat smiling at the Vongola. " Sorry for being late. A few inconveniences showed up at the last minute." He falsely apologized. A vain instantly popped in Tsuna's forehead. ' You are only telling the truth if you call yourself throwing a tantrum an inconvenience, Byakuran-sama.'

Dino watched Tsuna intensely. He was the vain in Tsuna's head popped and he glared even more at Byakuran, ' Byakuran, would you go even far enough as to bring a kid into this!'

And so the meeting continued. They negotiated financial shares, alliance boundaries, and that Byakuran should keep his hands off of their armory. Occasionally Byakuran would ask Tsuna something and Tsuna was obediently answer him. Which made the Vongola glares turn into death glares. Even the ninth looked disapprovingly at Byakuran. And after every sentence or so both families flung lines and lines bad names and cuss words at each other.

No matter how hard the people on the Vongola side tried they couldn't stopped from looking at Tsuna. Giotto just felt like there was something about him. Something that made him want to go over there, hit Byakuran, and then take Tsuna and protect him. Yamamoto blushed every time he saw him and when he looked away, he started to think about him. He couldn't get the kid out of his freaken mind! Sasagawa just looked in confusion. Mukuro thought up plans to like Giotto take Tsuna away and then 'taking him' . Chrome thought that the boy was cute and being Mukuro's sister shared the dislike feeling of Tsuna being with Byakuran. Hibari swore and swore in his mind. This kid Tsunayoshi looked so cute and defenseless he looked like a fluffy little animal. And Hibari known for his soft side for cute animals couldn't stand the thought that Tsuna was staying with that other herbivore.

' Goodness, these people know more cuss words than a drunken sailor.' Tsuna thought. " Tsu~chan." Tsuna looked down at Byakuran. "When is the science division supposed to be done with that new weapon?" Byakuran asked looking up at Tsuna. He opened his mouth to answer. Giotto slammed his fists on the table. Making a loud bang echo throughout the now silent room. " Byakuran you bastard what did you do!" Giotto yelled.

The Millefiore boss smiled innocently at Giotto and cocked his head. " By what ever do you mean, Giotto-san?" He asked playing stupid. Reborn lifted the front part of his fedora to glare even harder at Byakuran. " He is talking about , Byakuran, the kid you have there standing next to you. He isn't wearing your family crest, so he isn't in your family. Not to mention that he's dressed like a butler." Byakuran giggled. " Why, isn't it obvious? Tsu~chan is my butler~!" He said those words as if it had a good taste to them. Tsuna took this as the signal to introduce himself. " Nice to meet you. My name is Tsunayoshi Sawada. Please call me Tsuna for short." Tsuna bowed to the Vongola politely.

Giotto narrowed his eyes at Byakuran. " Looks more like you came to him, kidnapped him, then brain washed him into becoming your servant. Or are you threatening him?" Tsuna laughed a little. " Well, Giotto-san. I will not deny the first. Byakuran was the one who came to me." The image of when they made the contract flashed in Tsuna's and Byakurans minds."

The Ninth nodded to the butler. " So Tsunayoshi, why are you with Byakuran?" Tsuna smiled that kind of smile that made it look like there were sparkling flowers in the background…that was until they heard what he said. " It is as my master says. I am his butler."

Gokudera snorted. " Probably just another scum that joined that damned family." The other guardians looked at Gokudare in shock. Tsuna just giggled. " Oh I take it that you don't like this family very much." Gokudare started leaning forward in his seat. " Yeah that's right! Your family is a worthless, poor excuse for a family unlike the Vongola!"

Byakurans guardians looked like they were about to kill but Byakuran gave them the signal not to. He was enjoying himself knowing full well what his precious butler was doing. Tsuna tilted his head to the side. " Poor, are we?" he asked calmly. " Yeah that's right! You people probably don't have a penny on ya!" Gokudera yelled. Tsuna put his finger to his lip. " So you're saying that you're richer than us? Is that it?" Gokudare cringed his nose. " Yeah that's damn right!"

" So you're so rich you could, oh say, by us a new oven?"

" Hell yeah! I'd be able you buy two hundred of your new ovens and still have enough money to buy the whole country of Japan!"

Tsuna clapped his hands together. " Perfect! Then I will be sending you the check for a mister Gokudera Hayato."

A silence fell upon the room. What did Tsuna mean by that?

Then it hit them.

Innocent Tsuna had just swindled Gokudera into buying the Millefiore family a new oven. The Vongola stared wide eyed at the butler. Gokudera was so caught up yelling he didn't even realize what he had said. Including Dino. Reborn kept his poker face but on the inside he was mildly impressed. The Millefiore guardians were either snickering, covering their mouths trying to hold back their laughter to very little avail. Even Byakuran giggled. " Tsu~chan is so talented~. I've never gotten the chance to really see your character reading skills Tsu~chan. Would you mind demonstrating it? How did you know his name was Hayato?"

Tsuna still kept a calm smile on his face. " Hai. Judging from the silver hair and booms in your pockets I'd say that you are the hurricane bomb. And from the amount of food poison in your blood I'd say that your sister is the Poison Scorpion Bianchi. From the way your blood pumps faster at the mention of her name I'd say that you have been on the receiving end of he cooking. Judging from the cat fur on your clothes you have a yellow and white cat at home. And from the loss of Dying Will Flame I'd say that it was your box animal and that it woos you with it's cite looks and actions to get more flame. From the amount of smoke coming out of your lungs and the cigarettes in you pocket you are indeed a smoker even though you are under aged might I add. From the amount of yelling you did just now you are mighty short tempered. And from the way you are gaping at me I'd also say that everything I have just said is true."

Gokudera just sat there. His mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water. Staring wide eyed at the teen. Giotto glared even more at Byakuran. " Damn you you Bastard! You taught him how to do that!" Byakuran flapped his hand dismissively. " Ari,ari. No need to be so mean."

Dino spoke up this time. " Byakuran you just killed one of your own subordinates." The accused boss just shrugged his shoulders. " He deserved it. He betrayed the family after all. What did he do Tsu~chan?"

" Glo Xinia sold our information and weaponry. He had made foreign negotiations without permission. Sold other families out. Robbed the Millefiore official money and spent it on his own accord. He also ruined some plans on purpose. And he also killed another family member."

The other family fell silent. The Ninth went over the reasons in his head. Yes those were crimes worthy of death. The soon to be ex-Vongola boss nodded. The meeting went on without any more event until Tsuna sensed another presence quickly coming.

Tsuna cupped his hand close to Byakurans ear like was going to tell him a secret. Tsuna whispered something in Byakurans ear. Byakuran nodded. He curled two fingers under his butlers collar and pulled Tsuna down farther. Byakuran had enough guts to lick Tsuna's lips seductively right there in front of everybody. When Byakuran pulled back he said, "Hurry back." Tsuna bowed walked out the grand double doors that led to the dining room.

All the guardians including Dino looked to Byakuran in rage. " What the hell was that." Byakuran just giggled. " Tsu~chan had predicted that there would be another family wanting to attack us during our meeting. So I sent him to take care of it."

" So you just send a kid into battle! He'll die!"

Mukuro tried to at least put on a mask. " Speaking of battles, there is a rumor that you have a so called secret weapon."

Byakuran did nothing but his smile grew. He didn't answer Mukuro's question but the sound of screaming and gunshots coming from outside the door Tsuna had just used did.

As soon as Tsuna walked in the dining hall the people from the balcony and behind the pillars started shooting at him.

Like clockwork Tsuna quickly picked up a silver tray from the cart next to him and used it as a shield against the incoming bullets headed straight for him.

Tsuna jumped into the air so he held there in midair for a pulled his arm back,readying it,then threw the silver tray at the people on the balcony like a Frisbee.

Like domino's, the tray smashed into one mans head after another effectively knocking them out if not killing them with one last yell.

When the butler landed on the white clothed table he automatically dashed forward in a straight line.

With each plate and silverware Tsuna,like lightening,threw them at the intruders killing them one by one.

" What the hell is this guy!"

" He's not even using his Dying Will Flames!"

" It doesn't matter! Just kill him!"

" AHHHHH!"

When all dishes gone he crouched down like a cat and sprang inhumanly high in the air.

In swift movements handfuls forks and knives slid from the confides of Tsuna's sleeves. Sharp ending first. He threw them ,much like how Beliphegor from the Varia family threw his knives, at the remaining occupants in the room.

After each throw another group of utensils replaced the last, again thrown at an individuals head or throat.

All this with an evil smirk mocking the dead or soon to be dead.

Eventually all of the invading party were dead in pools of their or of their comrade's blood.

Tsuna hung upside down from a swinging grand chandelier lined with lights by his legs with his arms crossed. A bored expression on his face.

He reached into his front cout pocket and clicked open his old-fashioned pocket watch.

"My,my. That took quite a while."

Bang! Bang! Bang!

Crash!

" What the hell is this guy!"

" He's not even using his Dying Will Flames!"

" It doesn't matter! Just kill him!"

" AHHHHH!"

Crash!

Everyone in the room including the Millefiore stared at the door in horror. Except for Byakuran. Just what the hell was going on back there? To answer their thoughts the double doors opened again and in walked in Tsuna. He moved a very annoying strand of his long hair behind his back while he walked obediently over to his master. ( for the love of god I feel like I'm writing S&M )

Byakuran smiled up at Tsuna. He felt extremely happy being able to shove the fact that Tsuna returns to him willingly right in the Vongolas faces. " So how did it go Tsu~chan?" Tsuna nodded to him. " It went exactly to plan. I have dumped the bodies at the ally behind the police station for the police to find."

Mukuro's eyes narrowed at the last sentence. " Tsuna-san, you…" Tsuna smiled at the illusionist. " As you have probably guessed Mukuro-san I am your so called 'secret weapon'. Though the name is more or less extremely blunt."

With the Vongola

Reborn walked up to Giotto in his office. Giotto looked up from his piles and piles of paper work. " Reborn. Have you found the data? Have you found anything out about Tsunayoshi?" Giotto nearly smiled at remembering lowered his fedora. A shadow loomed over his emotionless face. " You'll want to look for yourself."

Jun: ...I am absolutely shocked at how long this chapter ended up. But beside that I was a blast. This chapter was so much fun to make.

Uncensored version on Livejournal account. link on profile.