So this is my first Harry fic- Please please review it and tell me what you think. I welcome all feedback and if you aren't planning on reading anymore please tell me why.

I obviously don't own any of these characters etc etc- definitely wouldn't have killed Snape if they were mine.

Here we go with Chapter two. Hope you like it.

Chapter Two- Back to the Start.

He was back at Kings Cross; somehow he always ended up back here.

He looked down at the small grotesque shape writhing and moaning at his feet. He felt revulsion, and pity for it but no fear, this time there was no fear.

'Do not feel pity for him' Dumbledore appeared at his side 'He does not deserve your pity. This path was his choice and no one else's.'

Harry couldn't help but feel pity; and a kind of longing, he knelt down beside the hideous creature and gathered it into his arms.

'This is your choice too Harry' Dumbledore said. 'Choose wisely'

Harry looked back at the thing in his arms, its features sharpened and suddenly he was looking at himself. The grotesque malformed hideous creature had his face, and he knew why he pitied it.

Harry woke up with a start. It was pitch black and his heart was thumping, but he didn't know why. He didn't remember the dream.

'You ok?' Ron said in a low voice from behind his curtains. Harry checked his watch, it was 4am.

'Yeah, I just… I don't know. I guess I had a dream or something.' Harry said, pulling the curtains back. Ron was perched on the side of his bed. 'What about you? You couldn't sleep?'

'No. I had the dream again. I can never sleep after that.' Ron shuddered.

"The one with Bellatrix?' Harry asked. Ron had been having this nightmare ever since the end of the war.

'Yeah, we were back at Malfoy Manor again, and Hermione was screaming, she's always screaming for me and I never come. I can never come. And she's always screaming. Every time I close my eyes I hear her screaming.' Ron said, his face grey and dark shadows circling under his eyes.

'Ron you have to get some sleep, you can't keep going like this.' Harry said.

'Well it's not like I don't try, but it's not so easy to get back to sleep after that Harry. I notice you don't manage it yourself very often do you?'

'Well that's true but its not every night for me. You should see Madam Pomfrey; get her to give you Dreamless Sleep or something.' Harry said.

'I don't want anyone to know Harry, especially not Madam Pomfrey. The war is over and we all just want to get on with our lives. I don't want anyone fussing over me.' Ron said.

'Maybe you should ask Snape then, if you don't want anyone fussing over you.' Harry said with a smile.

Ron looked at him like he was crazy. 'I may not want anyone to fuss over me, but I don't want anyone to make fun of me either you know.'

'He's not so bad I don't think. At least he understands what we're going through.' Harry said.

'Harry I know you have some sort of hero worship thing going on with Snape right now but seriously he is that bad.' Ron said flatly. 'I mean I agree with you completely about all he has suffered through and everything he did for the war. I agree that he is the bravest person we've ever known, but just because we know that now doesn't mean he's not a git anymore.'

'He never was a git!' Harry exclaimed. 'And I don't have some sort of hero worship thing going on. I respect him is all.'

'Well you can bet he doesn't respect you Harry, and you know he's a git. Do I have to remind you of all the stuff he's done? The way he treated you in your very first potions class for example?' Ron said.

'Ron don't ask me to explain it but I just can't think of him as a git anymore. And if you asked him for dreamless sleep I bet he would help you without making fun of you.' Harry said firmly.

Ron grumbled something under his breath that sounded suspiciously like 'don't bet on it'.

Harry raised his eyebrows but didn't say anything.

'We should go back to sleep I guess.' Ron said.

Harry shook his head 'I don't want to go to sleep.'

'Me neither.' Ron got out of bed. 'Let's wake Hermione'

'Why?' Harry asked.

'Bring your invisibility cloak'. Ron said with a smirk, before fishing a small object out of his trunk.

Harry grinned. 'Ok!' He said and pulled his cloak out from underneath his pillow.

Ron gave him a funny look. 'You keep it under your pillow?'

'It's a Deathly Hallow Ron. You bet your ass I keep it under my pillow.' Harry replied as he followed Ron out of their dormitory and into the common room. 'How exactly are we going to wake Hermione?' he asked.

Ron blushed. 'Well uh we have this thing that like, if one of us wants the other one in the middle of the night we can activate it and it will wake the other person up silently. Like if we have a bad dream or something...' He trailed off.

Harry laughed. 'You mean you activate it if you want to have sex you mean.'

'Well it's not just for sex; we do use it for other things too!'

'Uh huh.' Harry said drily. 'Go on and do it then.'

Ron lifted the small silver ball he had fished from his trunk to his lips and kissed it. It glowed red for a moment. Ron closed his eyes and sighed. 'She's coming.' He said.

I bet she is, Harry thought but refrained from commenting.

When Hermione entered the common room she at first looked slightly disappointed and then suspicious. 'Ron don't tell me this is your idea of a kinky threesome? Because we really don't have to do everything together you know. No offense Harry.'

Harry looked at Ron who had gone bright red again. 'Not just for sex hey?'

'Well just because we haven't used it for something other than sex yet doesn't mean we can't!' He said huffily. 'And of course it's not for a threesome, Hermione. You should know that! Harry and I couldn't sleep is all and we just thought it might be nice to all go for a night time wander and why are you laughing at me?'

Harry and Hermione couldn't help it. Ron's face was a picture of indignation.

'Oh Ron I'm sorry it's just you're too easy to tease!' Hermione said. 'Come here.' She took his face in her hands and kissed him gently. 'Better?'

'Yes.'

'Good.' She said. 'Now I don't want to burst anyone's bubble or anything but it's gone 4am and we have classes tomorrow. Do you really think that we should be wandering around after curfew for no reason? What if we get caught?'

'Like that's never happened before.' Ron said. 'Besides we have a reason. Breakfast. I'm hungry.'

'You're always hungry.' Hermione replied. 'That's not a very good reason.'

'But sex is?' Harry asked slyly

Hermione went red. 'Don't knock it when you don't have it Harry.' She said.

'Touché.'

'Come on Hermione stop being you and come with us. We really can't go back to sleep.' Ron whined.

Hermione sighed. 'I promised myself that I was going to just concentrate on getting through my studies this year without any adventures or anything bad happening. I thought that would be a piece of cake with the war finally over.' She glared at the two of them. 'I guess I was wrong. But if we lose any points from this little outing I'm never doing anything you say again, and you can't copy off my homework anymore.'

'Fine, fine. Whatever. Let's just get going ok?' Ron said pushing her towards the door.

Harry pulled the cloak over the three of them. 'This really doesn't fit all three of us under it anymore.' Harry said.

'Well you're the fools that chose to wake me up.' Hermione grumbled. 'You could have just gone without me.'

'No we couldn't.' Ron said.

'No way.' Harry echoed. They were a three, and after the dream Ron had had and whatever had caused Harry to wake up so suddenly, they needed to be reminded of that.

They saw no one on their way to the kitchens. The castle was still and deserted, asleep.

They were greeted by the usual throng of house elves, lead by Kreacher who kept bringing them more and more food until even Ron said he had enough.

'I really don't think I can eat anymore.' He groaned. 'Guess we can skip breakfast.'

'Now what?' Harry asked. 'I don't want to go back yet.'

'Me either.' said Ron. They sat in silence for a moment.

'I feel empty.' Harry said quietly.

'After all that?' Ron exclaimed.

'That's not what I mean Ron. I just feel like I don't have a purpose anymore.' He said. 'Empty.'

Hermione nodded. 'I know what you mean. Every year of our lives since we started here we've had something happen. Something to work out, something to solve, something to defend or retaliate against. Usually something to do with Voldemort. And now that's all gone it's like school isn't the same anymore, it's not enough.'

'You'd think that would be a pleasant relief hey?' Ron asked. 'So why isn't it?'

'I don't know.' Harry said, 'But you're right Hermione. I think that's a big part of it.'

'I guess we'll just have to accept it.' Hermione said. 'There is nothing to fight against anymore. Move on, get over it and be normal for once like everyone else.'

Harry lifted his head off the table. 'I have an idea. Let's go to the third floor corridor.'

'Why?' Ron asked confused.

'Because that's where it all started, back in first year. That's where we first faced Voldemort and realised what we were up against. Maybe if we go back to the start we can let go of it all.'

Hermione looked at him thoughtfully. 'That's not a terrible idea Harry. Trauma victims are actually encouraged to revisit the sites of their trauma to help manage the stress of an attack and to minimise panic attacks.'

'Except we aren't trauma victims Hermione.' Ron said.

'Then what are we?' Harry asked softly.

Ron shook his head. 'We aren't. It's not the same.' He said shakily.

Hermione reached over the table and took Ron's hand. 'That's exactly what we are. Us and everyone else too, but it's ok. We'll be ok.'

Ron took a deep breath. 'Let's go back to the start then.'

'Harry?' Hermione said 'What are you looking at?'

Harry was looking at the huge dark shadow creeping across the table towards Ron and Hermione's entwined hands. It moved like a slow creeping fog, and Harry felt an unbelievable urge to knock their hands out of the way. He shook his head. It was gone.

'Nothing. It's nothing. Never mind.' He said quickly. 'Let's go.'

Please review and tell me how often to update, and I'll try my best!