AN: This is an AU afterall, an alternate to Ling and Ed being swallowed by Gluttony and the ripples that happen because of it.

Second Chance

Chapter 2

Denial

The secret to most interpersonal communication is to simply listen. The sad fact was that people have difficulty speaking the truth as it makes them vulnerable and sometimes they do not want to even admit the truth to themselves. Listening got Riza far in life, as she was able to read between the lines of dialogue and also utilize context clues when she wasn't sure what was going on. Right now, however, it wasn't shedding any light on what the hell was happening. Not when she was looking at a newspaper from 1915.

She continued to pretend she was reading the news in hopes of restoring her lost memory, but in reality she was listening in on the men in the next room. They were in the doctor's home, the man who had carried her to the car was arguing with him over checking into the hospital. Dr. Knox and Roy Mustang, two names that meant absolutely nothing to her, and the young man was Edward and the suit of armor was Alphonse. There was also a young girl in the next room, someone else who had been badly hurt. Everyone assured her that nobody was injured due to her car accident...mainly because she didn't have one.

There wasn't anything fake about the familiarity or worry on the faces of these people, they genuinely were concerned with her well being and her confusion. Knox said that the incident with 'Envy' could have caused head trauma but it was more likely an affect of 'whatever alchemy you conjured up back there, Roy'. Mustang had looked away and dismissed that comment, then grew irritated when Edward asked what he did. That was maybe ten minutes ago, but clearly the young man was not easily dismissed as Ed returned to the earlier conversation.

"Colonel, what's this on the Lieutenant's shirt?"

"It's blood, Fullmetal."

Riza looked up from the paper as she sat in bed and focused on the voices. That young man was distraught about leaving the scene of the incident, but had managed to cram into the car with his brother Al after declaring Envy took Gluttony home. She was starting to believe Knox when he diagnosed her with head trauma. In the packed car, she remained cradled in Roy's arms in the front seat as he tried to brush off the pain he was in. She looked at the Elric boys in the back seat as they sat with the other victim across their laps. She kept nodding off, unconsciousness beckoning her to let it ease her pain, exhaustion and questions, but she'd jolt awake as soon as she felt it getting too close. She was afraid she wouldn't wake up this time so she tried to keep her eyes open as long as possible. Unfortunately it felt so damned good to be held like she was a treasure that she finally couldn't fight off unconsciousness anymore.

She did wake up despite her fears and still nothing made sense, especially the reasoning behind coming to the doctor's home instead of taking everyone to the hospital. Limbs were missing. Memories were missing. She was having a hard time rationalizing anything. She was even doubting whether or not she was really alive because this didn't feel like the same world she had left.

"This is a washed out transmutation circle. What the hell did you do?"

"Medical alchemy. I don't have gloves for that."

Riza just couldn't make sense of that either. Alchemy. It kept coming up in conversation as if it was a daily topic of conversation instead of a an interesting footnote in a science book. She jumped as Roy entered the room and smiled as he looked at her. Always a glow about him when he looked at her and she couldn't help but enjoy the warmth of it. "Alchemy?"

Roy walked over and sat on the bed. In almost losing her, he was no longer strong enough to keep up their usual act. He looked at her again, just to make sure she was real. "I know, not my specialty but Knox helped me. I needed to stop the bleeding, you were going into shock."

"Did I die?" She asked and watched him freeze and his eyes betray him. "Is that what this is? Some sort of afterlife?"

"This is hardly heaven Riza. It's not hell either. It's just..."

"Not real." She said and he gave her a look that she couldn't quite figure out. She pushed the newspaper to him. "I was not alive in 1915. I'm not a Lieutenant and I don't know any of you. I'm work for a firearms company. I was on my way to deliver a presentation about our newest automatic rifle to the military. Along with ballistics data and my research on gunpowder. So, that being said, they will be looking for me when I don't show up."

"Ok. I guess that means we're going to the hospital." He mumbled and rubbed his eyes with his hand. Knox was probably right. Between the injuries and alchemy, her reality was completely distorted. If this was due to some brain injury than there would be swelling and that was more than Knox could treat in his house. Amputations for an army doctor were common place, however he was only comfortable working with brains during autopsy. Riza needed medication to make sure that this didn't get worse. It was worth the risk to return to the hospital for her, he wasn't going to take any more chances with her life. "I don't want to put us in a military facility now that we know Bradley is one of them, but it's an acceptable risk. We need to have a specialist look at you."

"Thank you." She said and she could see his hand start to move for hers, but he thought better of it and smoothed out the sheets instead.

"Riza..."

"Mustang!" Ed burst into the room and held up the bloody shirt. "You think I won't recognize this?"

Riza watched the teenager point to her shirt, stained from the accident. She could see something that looked like a circle that was drawn in blood and not a ring of blood. Dr Knox had given her something to wear that was clean, from his wife's closet since apparently his wife left and never bothered to pack. She was eager to get out of her wet and bloody clothes and didn't investigate them before. However that was not the shirt she put on his morning. She was concentrating on Ed and almost didn't catch Roy sneaking his hand into his pants to pull out...gloves? Was he going to inspect her shirt with gloves now? After he practically smeared her blood all over him when he was carrying her earlier? She wasn't prepared for his hand to raise and for him to snap his fingers. A streak of flame shot forth and lit the shirt on fire, rendering her wide-eyed and speechless as the fabric burned up in Ed's metal hand.

After the incident in Knox's home, she decided it was best to interact with everyone as little as possible. She was scared and disoriented and it was making her feel sick. Ed and Al left the doctor's home after the shirt incident as they needed to go find a friend named Ling, Ed's disgust was written all over his face and Al made sure he expressed his concern for her safety in the voice of a scared child. That left Roy driving her to the hospital so he could check back in for an injury he had received earlier in the week and to make sure she got the medical attention she needed. She had little choice, and simply nodded and went along for the ride.

She really didn't have another option.

This man, Roy Mustang, was apparently protective of her and saved her life. She didn't know him, but she didn't know anyone, and her best option was to stay with him. She also decided it was best to observe than volunteer information and gather what knowledge she could of her situation that way. As they drove to the hospital she felt like she was going back through a historical village, and a creeping sense of uncertainty began to overtake her thoughts.

The cars were all older models, models she had never seen. The buildings and streets were out of a painting from the turn of the century, complete with gaslights. Phone booths and painted signs, no billboards or neon or cell towers. Butcher shops and bakeries, no super markets. Even a hardware store and apothecary. This was way too elaborate to be a hoax. This was not home either. So what was it?

So now she faced the conundrum of questioning herself and what she knew. Everything in front of her was fluid and she was the rock in the stream. The people she met, knew her and each other, and the city in front of her was very much real. So was Knox right? Was she really just confused, her brain struggling to make sense of something and ergo inventing some fantasy to come to terms with what happened?

She did die, after all. That, along with her name, was the only thing that everyone agreed on.

Riza tried to keep her eyes on the road, look out the window and take in everything that was around her, however she could feel him stealing glances in her direction. She could feel his concerned looks and finally let her eyes shift to him. The look on his face and in his eyes almost killed her again.

Whoever this man was, there was no doubt in her mind that he truly loved her. She felt a flutter in her heart and wished it was just that simple to accept that this was her life. However there was a staggeringly high probability that once she gave in to this reality, or the nagging need to close her eyes and rest, that it would disappear or she would lose herself completely. Despite telling herself to stay silent, despite telling herself to stay distant...she couldn't help but ask him one question. "We're more than co-workers, aren't we?"

"Yes." Roy said and ran his hand over the steering wheel. "We've been together a long time. We've known each other since we were teenagers...we've been through war together..."

"Are we together?" She asked as she tried to read his face. Was he hurt because she didn't remember and had to ask?

"We can't be because of fraternization laws. I'm your superior officer." It sounded so much better than the truth. The made excuses because work came first and they lied to themselves and said they'd eventually make time. The had a history that bonded them yet also repelled them. They loved each other but also loved stewing of the pain of denying themselves love.

"Why are you having such a hard time answering my question, sir?" She said and he reacted favorably to it. It was the tone she used at work when people weren't getting her the work or results she needed. She hated hearing excuses when she wanted answers. He looked over at her, he seemed relieved to have her bark an order at him.

"I have always loved you. Our jobs and goals have kept us from being able to do more than just settle for what time we can have together. I almost lost you Riza, you died and I realized that there wasn't any time left to make good on all those promises I made. We worked, we did our jobs so well that it earned us a lifetime of guilt and self-loathing and...as much as I hate myself, I love you. I want to give you everything, see you happy...and I don't think that's where my goals take us. I'm willing to give up my life, not yours. This is twice in one week you've made it clear to me that you don't value your life above mine and that is unacceptable. I'm not letting you slip away from me again, you're all I have."