Missing janitors were one thing. The akatsuki locked in a closet were another. The leader had no intensions of letting them out anytime soon. No one really knows why, but Itachi's guess is he rewards everyone like this.
"Hey," He began to ask, but decided to say something else. "Ever heard the happy song?" Half of them nodded.
"I made a new version of it," said Itachi.
"Spare us!" everyone screamed, and Itachi took a deep breath.
"Im really happy, im sugar coated me, happy good anger bad, that's just like Tobi," Itachi began to sing, as everyone screamed and covered their ears at the tone of Itachi's singing.
"I am really special, cause there's only one Sasori, Look at my smile, Zetsu's so dang happy, the people are jealous of Itachi, these are my love handles, and I am not fat," He continued.
"Spare us!" Screamed the 'missing' janitor, who ran into the door and bounced off mumbling about Liam Lynch's 'Happy song.'
"How are we to get out of here?" asked Zetsu.
"Zetsu's right, we need out or were going to starve," agreed Deidara.
"Well maybe some of us will," informed Zetsu. Deidara smacked him upside the head.
"At least we have each other, a few buckets, some bug spray, extra cloaks, and- Tobi, you know you're eating a mop, right?" said Kisame, turning to Tobi, who, in the dim light of the closet, was in fact eating a mop.
"Why are you eating a mop?" asked Kakuzu, who spoke for the first time in this story. Woooow.
"Tobi is being a good boy and eating a mop so you get out alive. Good boys aren't cannibals," Said Tobi.
"I dare you to say that again!" said Zetsu, who was biting Itachi's arm.
"Ok, let's just put our differences aside and work together on getting out and Zetsu, your drooling on my arm," Said Itachi, giving Zetsu 'The Look.'
By that night, almost all were driven into insanity by each other. Tobi continued announcing that he was a good boy, Zetsu's leaves continued getting shoved into Hidan's eye, Itachi did the hamster dance, Kisame began dancing with a mop, Deidara attempted to blow the door, Kakuzu's rage was building, and Sasori tried melting the door. His attempts never succeeded.
"ugh, there's a bucket on my head again," Said Zetsu, backing up. His leaves plunged deep into Hidan's eye.
"Auhg, Zetsu, your stabbing my eye! Again!" He screamed, and bumped into Itachi, who was doing 'ring around the rosy' with Kisame and a mop.
"If you bump into me one more time, I swear, Itachi, I'll nail you to this door and Ill blow it up, unn," Said Deidara threateningly. Itachi dared to bump in the next 2 minuets.
Bump bump
"Itachi…"
Bump bump
"Ok, that's it!" Screeched Deidara. In 5 seconds flat Deidara and Sasori had welded Itachi to the door.
"ok, I think I can get us out if I melt the door," Said Sasori.
" Don't you dare!" Screamed Itachi, accidentally kicking Kakuzu.
"I say that you should," Said Kakuzu, who had been kicked in the eye. "I was tracking that dime I lost earlier, and now there's no way I can see it!"
"Not my fault you have a big head," Said Itachi, more concerned about being melted.
"ok, im going to do it," said Sasori. Deidara attempted to hand him a match. It fell on the floor.
If you are ever faced with a challenge like this, one word will NOT calm you down. That word you should prepare for if you are ever in a closet with a bunch of S- ranked criminals.
Boom.
Deidara did it.
"AAAAHHHH!!!" all of the Akatsuki screamed. Even the leader who was by now back at his house dreaming about Human/ flytrap/ Oreo people. No, wait, just Zetsu.
"Thanks a lot for dropping that, Deidara," Said Kisame, who noticed he was sitting on a cactus in a rain forest. Talk about misplaced. Kisame then walked behind a tree to get out the thorns, while everyone else noticed Itachi was missing now, and the janitor was on Zetsu's head. Zetsu, of course was trying to close his leaves, as Deidara sat the janitor on a clay rocket.
XXX
"get me down from here!" screamed Itachi, whose door was working as a hang glider.
XXX
To be continued…