Chapter Two

Renee

It was almost Christmas once more and this year Bella would be old enough to feel the excitement. I went to town but still made a lot of their presents as money was, as ever, very tight. We were paying a mortgage and I needed a car for my evening job which I only took to get a little extra in to help pay the bills, I would have preferred to stay with the girls. If Charlie wasn't home then Sue or one of the others from the Res would come and babysit and the girls adored this, even though they only had a little while before bedtime. That was something both Charlie and I were very strict about, kids needed their sleep and we made sure the girls went up at a reasonable time.

I started to feel ill the beginning of December, running a fever and I couldn't keep anything down, but then I seemed to recover but, unfortunately, it was just a lull before the storm and I spent the whole of Christmas week in bed or on the toilet leaving Charlie to deal with the girls. Needless to say, there was no Christmas dinner and one or other of the girls was usually perched on my bed waiting for me to wake up so they could show me another of their presents. Would the Swan family never have a Christmas all together? At least, I couldn't blame Charlie, this time, it waa all down to me but no less disappointing for the fact.

I was already beginning to dread Christmas and begged Charlie to take some time off and visit my mom, she still lived in the same town where I was born, Downey California. We'd been estranged for years, ever since my dad left. It was as of she blamed me in a way and we had argued violently ever since, until the day I ran away without a backward glance. It wasn't until I had a family of my own that I finally took the first step and wrote to her with photo's of the girls and to my surprise and relief she had rung me back. We weren't exactly back where we started but she was my mom and it sounded like she had finally gotten her life back together. Besides it was somewhere Charlie couldn't get called back to work or be forced to stay on because of an incident or something. He procrastinated, at first, he didn't want to end up spending Christmas as a buffer between me and my mom but eventually I wore him down and he agreed managing to swing three weeks off, a whole three weeks with just us and the girls, plus my mother of course, but even that thought couldn't ruin my joy and expectation.

Mom rented a two-bed house in town, close to the house where I was born and promised to get a couple of air beds for the girls to sleep on in the lounge. As the time got closer I found myself worrying that maybe this hadn't been such a good idea. Mom kept ringing to ask me to take something else with me until it felt like we would be providing not only the food and drink but the decorations and even the tree but when I pointed this out to Charlie he just smiled,

"This was your idea remember, and she's on her own Renee, I doubt she's bothered about Christmas in years."

Of course, he was right but it didn't stop this nasty feeling in the pit of my stomach from rising up from time to time.

Megan was sick again the day we left but the infection she had fought so bravely as a small child had left her a little weak and she picked up just about everything that was going while Bella sailed through without a cough or cold. Her particular weakness was coordination, our Bella could trip over a thread, fall on the soft dry ground and cut her knees, she was a walking disaster and I used to joke I should have married a doctor...preferably a Pediatrician!

We flew down to Los Angeles and rented a car driving to Downey in the evening. It had been a long day and both girls were shattered, but they perked up when we arrived, excited at the thought of seeing their Grandma for the first time. She came to the door all smiles, but I could smell the spirits on her breath and prayed she hadn't started drinking again, not now, not with the girls here, please. She hugged me rather too tightly then squatted down to look at the girls.

"Well, two little Christmas Angels if ever I saw them. Come on in girls."

She totally ignored Charlie but then they had never met, we were still estranged when Charlie and I got married, but I wondered how long peace could reign in this atmosphere. The house was warm and clean but there was no sign of Christmas anywhere and the girls looked around confused.

"Don't you have a tree, Grandma?"

"No angel but mommy and daddy will get us one tomorrow. There's a place at the back of Wal-Mart that sell them real cheap. I did get you some decorations to make, though."

She waved a hand airily at a heap of tinsel and colored card on the table and Megan ran over, Bella following along behind and falling over, banging her head on a wooden stool that stood in the center of the room. I thought mom might get up to check on her, but she turned back to me with a sigh,

"I see she's got your trouble girl. Never could walk without falling flat on your ass."

Then she turned gimlet hard eyes on Charlie,

"And you must be the hot shot lawman my girl fell for. You don't look much like Clint Eastwood to me, more like Inspector Clouseau."

I bit my lip, but I didn't say anything, I wouldn't spoil things for the girls while Charlie just smiled at her unsure what to say to that. Bella had the lid off some glitter and was powdering herself with it while Megan concentrated on opening the glue to stick what was left of the multi-colored glitter over a picture of a rather badly drawn Santa.

Christmas was a nightmare and I was so grateful to Charlie for keeping his temper. We went shopping for the Christmas meals, the fridge was almost bare, and all the trimmings including a tree and decorations to supplement those the girls had made. My mom did everything she could to bait Charlie and upset me, from allowing Megan to sample her drinks to leaving all the work to me while she sat glued to the T.V watching old movies and grumbling when the girls made too much noise.

"Kids got no respect these days. If you'd made all that racket while I was trying to watch something you'd have gotten a good beating girl."

Megan looked at me in horror and I was only too happy that Bella was too young to understand.

One afternoon my mom suggested Charlie and I took a walk,

"The girls will be fine with me, you two look like you could do with a bit of peace. We'll play cards shall we girls?"

We hesitated but the girls were already getting the set of snap from Bella's pile of presents and decided a walk around the block wouldn't take too long and it would get Charlie out from under my mom's feet, and out of range of her acid tongue.

The sun was shining and we sat on a park bench for a little while enjoying the peace, we loved our girls, but a few precious minutes alone were nice.

"I'm so sorry about my mom. If I had known how she was going to behave I would never have suggested this trip but at least, the family was together for once."

"Yeah, she isn't at all what I expected."

"She wasn't always like that Charlie. When I was little, when my dad was at home, she would spend hours playing with me. I guess she got bitter when he left."

"Well, if she treated him like she's treating me I don't blame him for bailing out."

He was right of course, but it hurt to hear how much he disliked her.

"Do you think the girls have enjoyed themselves?"

"You mean have they noticed they are staying with Ebeneezer Scrooge's mother? Hopefully not."

"She hasn't been that bad like you said she's just not used to children."

"Let's just say we won't be coming again."

I nodded wanting to argue but unable to against the truth, she had been truly awful although mainly to Charlie it had to be said, not the girls.