A clowder of cats

The rumble of booted feet, bouncing down the stairs, heralded the arrival of the youngest Summers sister.

"Alright, who broke my Xander?" Dawn glared at the assembled catwomen.

Buffy actually shrank back a bit from the look in her little sister's eyes. Normally she'd have just glared back, but the cat's eyes contacts Dawn wore, along with the extended canines, gave her snarl a feral look that Buffy wasn't used to on anything she couldn't stake. "She did it!"

Willow looked shocked at Buffy's betrayal, but a hint of pride was still lurking in her eyes from 'breaking' Xander. "Ididn'tmeantodoititwasanaccidentbutit'skindacutethewayhejustkneelstheredroolingandtwitching…" Willow ran down a bit, turning bright red beneath her mask.

Joyce smirked at the way the girls were fussing over Xander. It seemed like the only one of the three he was interested in, was the one that wasn't interested in him or was at the very least extremely good at hiding it. He was completely oblivious to the affections of the other two girls; One, because she meant too much to him for him to ever consider 'dirtying' her with thoughts of a sexual nature, much less actions and Two, because she was a whole two years younger than him. 'Two years seems like forever at their age.'

Joyce grinned to herself, as she decided to fix her erstwhile son. Grabbing her purse off the coffee table she pulled out a small cellophane wrapped object and purposely crinkled the wrapper.

Xander's eyes stopped tracking Willow's curves, snapping shut as he started sniffing the air.

Giggling the Summers matriarch shook the cellophane encased Twinkie several times and then tossed it into the air above Xander. She could have sworn his eyes flashed green for a second, as he leapt into the air from his knees and grabbed the Twinkie before diving behind the sofa.

Safely ensconced in the space between the wall and the sofa he began caressing the golden cake and singing The Twinkie Hunter's song. "I'm gonna eat you little Twinkie, I'm gonna eat you little Twinkie, cause I like eating Twinkies!"

The giggling reminded him that he wasn't alone. "It's my Twinkie, you can't have it!"

The giggling exploded into full blown laughter, as he devoured his precious noisily.

"Xander, come out from behind there and show me your costume." Dawn called out.

"Sure, give me a second." Xander quickly pulled up the cowl and took off the trench coat, so they'd get the full effect.

Popping out from behind the sofa, he dropped his trench coat on the couch and posed with his hands on his hips. "I'm Batman!"

Blushing under the catcalls, he quickly swirled his cape over himself.

Buffy grinned and teased him a bit. "You weren't kidding about the spandex effect, it's like you're wearing body paint."

"Yeah. So, Dawnie who are you dressed as?" He quickly tried to turn the spotlight away from his costume, that he was sure was creeping up on him.

"I am Catwoman 2.0. This year's latest Catwoman, for those who feel like upgrading from the old sagging models, but you can call me Huntress." Dawn grinned, showing off her own fangs and cat's eye contacts. Black boots, jeans, and shirt with a crocodile skin jacket made up the whole of her costume, ignoring the padding she'd added up front to try and compete with her older sister, whom she was glad did not get her breasts from mom's side of the family like Dawn did, even if the two years in age gave her a bit of an edge still.

Sensing the restart of hostilities between her daughters, Joyce spoke up.

"It's a very nice costume, Xander. Which Batman are you?"

"Why Lady Chatterley, I'm simply a common entomologist. The costume is to scare them out of hiding, as insects are a bat's favorite prey. Now, I was lead to believe you had some butterflies you wished to show me." Xander said in his best Adam West voice.

Joyce flushed, recognizing the movie reference, but grinned and was about to fire back a few choice lines of innuendo, when Buffy decided to step in and enforce the 'No Flirting With Mom' rule, by distracting him.

"I didn't think you were so vain you'd stuff your costume, Xan." The slayer reached out and started feeling a particular bulge in his spandex.

Joyce knew she should stop her, but this was something she could use to embarrass her daughter for years! She also knew, from the shape of things, that Xander hadn't stuffed anything and was a... talented young man for his age.

"What'd ya stuff in here, half the sock drawer and why's it so warm..." Buffy's voice trailed off and she froze, as she realized that Xander hadn't stuffed anything and that she was fondling her best male friend's bits.

"It's getting bigger!" Willow voiced, as the girls stared at Xander's crotch in disbelief at what Buffy was doing.

Xander's eyes were open about as wide as they could go. Somehow, he'd never, not even in some of his more perverted dreams, imagined this happening.

Joyce knew that as the responsible adult here she should step in, but it was taking nearly everything she had to keep from laughing. Oh yes, she had struck parental embarrassment gold tonight!

Just as everyone thought things had reached a level of embarrassment that no one could top, Dawn showed that she was indeed related to Buffy.

"How the hell am I gonna fit that in me?"

Dawn's complexion matched Willow's hair, as she realized that she'd said that out loud and seconds later she was up the stairs and hiding in her room, completely mortified.

Joyce spoke up over Xander's incoherent babbling of apologies and denials. "It's ok, Xander. I know you didn't do anything. She's just at that age. Buffy, perhaps you should move your hand now."

Buffy practically teleported away from Xander, her own apologies just as incoherent as his were a second before.

"You kids have fun. I don't think Dawn will be joining you. Looks like I'll be giving her The Talk a bit earlier then I did Buffy." Joyce just managed to shoo them outside, before she completely lost it and had to muffle her laughter with a sofa cushion.