A/N: Let me assure you that this is not a story with Gibbs as an abuser; that was never my intention and I'm sorry if that's what I conveyed. I merely wanted to show he made a mistake and like I said, I had to exaggerate a bit since even in an AU, I still intend to show the wrongness of Gibbs' attitude on the show and with the way he was during the last season (and even before that), I'm still a bit riled up.

You've got a point about the dinner part, though; as someone who never eats dinner, I keep forgetting it's not alright for everyone to skip it and that not everyone does that. But really; Gibbs just forgot because he was worried and had so many things going on around him (not a good excuse, but it actually happens sometimes); it was never meant to make it sound like he's neglecting Tony or being abusive with taking his food away from him and I get it that with wrong wording I made it look like he did it on purpose, so yes, I changed it a bit to clear things up.

Thanks for pointing my mistake out; I'm all for constructive criticism and again, sorry if I made anyone uncomfortable; I get it because to me, even spanking a kid is totally wrong and that makes me uncomfortable and I'd like to avoid doing the same thing to the others in my stories.

And finally, thanks a lot for your support and helpful words; all of you. Your supportive words encourage me and your criticism helps me make less mistakes.

The kids giggled and followed him to the kitchen; none of them caring that Tony wasn't there with them and Gibbs was still too mad or maybe shaken to remember they weren't all at the dinner table; there were so many things going on in his head that he simply didn't see what was happening in front of him or who was there and who was not.

Once the dinner was eaten, the kids were sent to get ready for bed. An hour later, they were all tucked in their beds and Gibbs felt quite happy with himself, feeling like a good, capable father. With a content sigh, he grabbed a mug of coffee and went to the living room to once again go through his notes and see if he could find a way to crack the case. Unaware that that night, Tony didn't go to bed; he didn't do anything; he just sat in the corner of his room, shaking quietly with fear as he waited to be dealt with. The little boy finally fell asleep in the corner of his room around two in the morning.

The next morning, Shannon called her husband to tell him that there had been an accident and they were swamped, so she couldn't come home that soon. Gibbs had to call his boss and ask if he could stay home with the kids or if he needed to find someone to come and watch them and was glad when Franks told him he could take the day and that he and Wilson, the SFA, could take care of the case on their own.

That being taken care of, he stood up and started to prepare the breakfast for the kids; they'd be up any minute now and since it was Saturday, they'd want to do something fun at home. He'd completely forgotten the events of the previous night and once the kids showed up in the kitchen, and his eldest wasn't among them, he frowned; it wasn't like Tony to oversleep; maybe he was sick?

Putting the plates in front of the kids, he absently wondered whether he should go up and wake the boy or maybe he should let him sleep since he didn't have school that day.

"Daddy?" Abby's tentative voice took his attention and it was then that he noticed the bruised forehead and the images of last night's incident rushed through his head.

"Yes, baby? Are you alright?" He asked worriedly.

"Yes, but... It's just-" She paused, eyeing the empty seat that her brother usually occupied and said, "Last night wasn't Tony's fault. Could you please not punish him and let him have breakfast?"

"What?" Gibbs was confused. 'Let him? Why would Abby say that? He'd never keep his kids from having their meals.'

"Well, you didn't let him have dinner last night, so he must be really hungry now and you were really mad at him and told him you didn't wanna see him and Daddy, it wasn't his fault I fell; he didn't do anything wrong."

"Yes, he did." Kate jumped in; she was tired of Tony's behavior and didn't mind a little bit of silence.

"He pushed you." Tim helped when he heard Kate's words.

"No." Abby screamed. "He didn't push me. He wasn't even near me. You fell on me and so I fell down the stair." She was now really angry at her playmates; how could they lie like that? Turning her gaze to her dad's confused one, she said, "Daddy, we were all playing together; Tony had grabbed my book and wouldn't give it to me, which I don't mind, but Timmy and Kate were screaming at him to give it back and Tony just held it up and he's taller than us, so Tim was jumping up to catch it but he missed one of the steps and fell back and bumped into me and then I fell down. I swear I'm telling the truth; Tony didn't do anything. Please don't hit him." She was close to tears now.

"Abs," Gibbs gasped. "I'd never hit Tony." And damn he was just remembering that Tony hadn't been at dinner with them last night and he hadn't paid much attention to it at the time! 'What is wrong with me? How could I call myself a father?' He thought painfully.

Abby's next words pained him even more. "But you did last night." She sounded uncertain. The images from last night's events weren't clear in her head and how Gibbs had pushed her brother out of the way seemed like hitting him to her.

Gibbs' frown deepened as he tried to remember his words and actions from the previous night and what he remembered sent a cold chill down his spine; he'd hit the boy; well, not really that, but he had handled the boy roughly and for a boy who'd been abused most of his short life, being pushed out of the way like that couldn't have been any better than actually being hit.

And his words... Jesus! Had he actually said those words to Tony? He'd spent months to bring the boy out of his shell and help him trust them; he knew the little boy still had nightmares about the early years of his life and that he still had flashbacks from those days, but they used to happen more frequently and now he'd gone and ruined all their hard work to lessen those nightmares and flashbacks; months and years of hard work was probably now ruined because of his thoughtless words and actions. Had he destroyed everything? Seriously! What the hell was wrong with him?

"Is that true?" He looked at Kate and Tim to hear their side of the story; not that he doubted Abby; he just wanted to see if the other kids would tell the truth or not; because it seemed like unlike Abby, they had no problem putting the blame solely on Tony.

Kate and Tim shared a look; they didn't know what to say. "But it was his fault." Kate finally said, whining a little.

"No, it was not." Abby screamed again. "Why are you lying? You aren't even real part of our family. You two are just staying here until you can get back to your own families; why are you trying to ruin Tony's only family?" She knew about Tony's past; not everything, but she'd heard some stuff from Tony and despite her young age and Tony's secrecy, she knew a few things that were really scary and she knew she didn't even know most of it, and to her that meant it must've been really terrible for Tony and she didn't want Tony to feel that way again, because she could remember the days that she'd just arrived to her new house and the way Tony wouldn't talk or play and she didn't want Tony to get like that again.

Kate and Tim were both pouting now and Gibbs watched the interaction between the kids and Abby's words and reaction made him shudder; she was right and she was just a kid; how could he treat his own son that way? Suddenly it was clear why Tony wasn't at the table with them and God; the boy hadn't even had dinner. Gibbs felt sick and he couldn't help hating himself.

Standing up from where he'd crouched in front of Abby, he said, "Eat your breakfast and go play; quietly." He added. "As for you two-" He eyed the other kids in the room; "We'll have a talk later and I'll let you know what your punishment is. We don't tolerate lying in this house."

Tim looked down quickly, but Kate opened her mouth to protest, Gibbs' glare made her close it immediately and look away, though.

Satisfied with the status quo, Gibbs left the kitchen and with some dread walked up to his son's room.

The moment he opened the door and saw the empty bed, his world tilted; had Tony run away? Had he lost his boy because he'd been unable to control his temper? Had he-

It was then, in the middle of all those awful thoughts that he heard a whimper and turned his head to find Tony's curled-up form in the corner of the room. What was Tony doing there? Why hadn't he slept in his bed? Why-

'Why do you think?' A scornful voice asked him in his head and it sounded scarily like Shannon's voice! He knew perfectly well that Shannon would be pissed off at him once she heard what he'd done; but he couldn't care about it right then; at that moment, he only cared about Tony and how he'd hurt his little boy.

Cautiously, he knelt beside his son, and gently shook his shoulder. "Tony? Son, can you wake up for me?" He asked quietly, careful not to startle the boy as it was clear that he was having a nightmare again; but apparently to Tony it didn't matter; because one moment the boy was lying on the floor, curled up in that corner and fast asleep, and the next moment, his eyes were wide open and he was sitting upright, pushing his back against the wall, like he thought he'd disappear if he tried hard enough.

"Hey, hey, calm down. It's just me." He tried to smile and sound soothing; like all the other times that he'd dealt with his son after a nightmare; except, this time, he was probably the nightmare and he slightly cringed at that thought.

Tony's eyes were filled with tears, but he clearly was fighting them, not letting them drop. The small boy quickly dropped his gaze to his lap and Gibbs knew it was because of the lessons that had been drilled into him by that good-for-nothing monster that called himself Tony's real father, back at Tony's first home.

"I'm sorry, Sir." The boy murmured quietly; "I didn't mean to fall asleep."

Too perplexed to say anything, Gibbs remained quiet and tried to find the right word.

Tony who'd mistook Gibbs' shock and silence for anger, quickly stood up and took his shirt off and turned his bare back to his dad. "I'm ready, Sir." And he sounded steady and firm and it made Gibbs' stomach churn; because no child should be that OK with being hit; no human-being should be really that OK with it and yet, here, his boy with his already marred skin was letting him beat and belt him and he actually sounded like he was ready for a lesson in fishing, not for being whipped.

The skin on his back still held the telltale signs of his father's abuse; thankfully, they were few pale lines and not very obvious, but it was still heartbreaking to see them, because they told the story of years of abuse; however, what hit Gibbs the hardest and finally made him lose the content of his stomach wasn't any of those old signs; what did it was the angry bruise on his arm. Running towards the bathroom; Gibbs barely made it to the sink before he started to throw up heavily. He'd left that bruise on his son's small, fragile arm; he'd been the one who'd hurt his son this time; he was no better than his biological father; those thoughts kept running through his head and with each wave, he puked more and more. He, of course, hadn't done it intentionally; at the time, he hadn't even realized that the hold he'd had on Tony's arm had been hard enough to leave a bruise; but that didn't matter; what mattered was that his son's arm was bruised now because he'd hold him too tightly.

He wasn't sure how long it took for him to stop puking; but it felt like hours.

Washing the sink and his mouth and face; he wished he could go back in time and stop his idiot self from doing that to Tony. Eyeing his face in the mirror, he felt sick again; he couldn't stand to look at himself and he couldn't stand the fact that he'd hurt his son with this hand; so before he knew what he was doing, he'd raised his fist and punched the mirror.

The pain that ran through his arm and up his shoulder was strangely satisfying and welcome; the sound of the breaking glass had caught the attention of the kids, though and soon they were all there; all but one; the one that Gibbs needed to see the most at that moment and he was sure the boy hadn't left his room only because Gibbs had ordered him to stay there until he was told otherwise.

"Gibbs?" Kate asked, sounding shocked and Gibbs noticed that Tim was hiding behind the wall, looking scared as Abby stood there, crying quietly.

"Hey; it's alright. Go to your rooms. Everything is OK." He sounded hoarse, but gentle.

"But-"

"Please." The request sounded more like an order, but it did the trick and the kids disappeared in Abby's room and closed the door.

Quietly, he grabbed the first aid kit, bandaged his hand to not scare Tony and walked back to Tony's room; the boy was still standing there with his back towards the door and God, if there was anything left in his stomach, Gibbs was sure he'd lose it again.

"Tony." He sighed quietly.

The boy stiffened, but didn't turn around. "Yes, Sir?"

He couldn't take it anymore; kneeling on the ground, Gibbs turned the boy around and pulled him into a fierce hug. "God, I'm sorry. Tony, I'm really really sorry. I know you probably hate me now and you should. You really should hate me. I hate myself; but I'm sorry; you gotta know that."

Tony was too shocked to say anything. He couldn't understand what was happening; was it part of the punishment? Was it this way in this house? Make him feel comfortable and suddenly strike? He felt that it was worse; he wished Gibbs would just hit him like his father and get it over with. He didn't care if Gibbs broke his bones or if he used his belt; he could take it; he had with his father; what he couldn't take was this uncertainty and it scared him more.

"Please, son. Please don't think I'm like your... Like that guy who just helped to bring you to this world. I'm not him. I love you and I didn't mean to hurt you." Gibbs was still talking.

When Tony remained silent; Gibbs pulled away a little and studied the boy in his arms. "Tony?"

Tony looked up with tears in his eyes and so much fear and uncertainty that Gibbs couldn't help but squeeze him into his chest. "I'm sorry."

"It's OK." The boy finally murmured; realizing that it was what Gibbs was expecting to hear.

"No, it's not." Gibbs shook his head. "Nothing about this is OK and it's all my fault; but I promise you, Tony; this will never happen again. NEVER." He stared the boy in the eyes and hoped the boy could read the sincerity in his eyes.

"It's OK. But-" Tony repeated. "Why are you apologizing?"

That simple question broke Gibbs' resolve and after years of not crying, tears left his eyes. God, what had he done? Tony was so far gone that he couldn't even understand he should hate this man for hurting him; he was thrown back to his early years so suddenly that he'd clearly believed he deserved the punishment and so he couldn't get why he was being apologized to.

"I shouldn't have hurt you, son. Never and in no way and I'm so sorry I did." Gibbs replied, knowing that he needed to make Tony see he hadn't done anything wrong and even if he had, being handled roughly; being sent to his room without food or punished like that wasn't OK and that Gibbs was the one who had done wrong, not him! "You've done nothing wrong; I shouldn't have just assumed and gotten mad at you and I shouldn't have hurt you. I'm sorry. But, Tony; even if it was your fault that Abby fell down the stairs, which I know wasn't your fault because Abby told me the whole story and I should've asked you about it first, instead of jumping into a conclusion; still, even if it'd been your fault, I should've handled it better; I promised you the day you came to us that you'd be safe here; that no one would ever touch you the wrong way or hurt you and here I am, the one who said those words and I still went and hurt you. So, I'm sorry, son and while it doesn't make what I did OK, I'll do everything in my power to make it better."

Tony's innocent face was so open and a tear had escaped the corner of his left eye. He couldn't believe his ears; this was new to him; last night he'd believed that things would become just like they'd been in his father's home and now... Now, Gibbs was apologizing to him; hugging him and saying all these things that didn't make sense; but all those things made him feel wanted and loved. And Gibbs had thrown up and his hand was hurt and he wasn't sure, but it seemed like Gibbs had hurt himself because he'd been angry with himself for hurting Tony and nobody had ever done that for him. So yes, he was lost and totally confused, but he nodded and rested his forehead against Gibbs' chest, feeling safe again for the first time since Abby got hurt.

Maybe things were actually different here; maybe he hadn't screwed up completely. "I'm sorry I screwed up. I didn't mean to." He said quietly into his dad's chest.

"No. No, son, you didn't screw up; I promise you. I'm the one who screwed up and I'll let Mommy punish me for it."

Tony's head snapped up; his green eyes filled with terror; "She'll hit you?"

"Oh, no. No; nobody hits anybody in this house." Gibbs said firmly; "And I know you can't believe me now after what I did last night, but I promise you it won't happen again. Well, I'll probably be grounded; she might take away my privileges; I don't know. We gotta let her decide and I'm sure she'll ask for your opinion. You should help her; I deserve to be punished."

"No." Tony shook his head vigorously.

Gibbs felt his son starting to panic, so he quickly changed his ways. "OK, you don't have to do anything you don't want to. Just calm down, please."

Forcefully, Tony calmed down his breathing. "Thanks, Dad." He said quietly.

Swallowing the lump in his throat, Gibbs once again squeezed the boy to his chest. "No, Tony, thank you. I couldn't have asked for a better son."

He felt like Tony was falling asleep in his arms and he momentarily thought about letting him; but then he remembered that the boy hadn't had his dinner last night; a stupid mistake on his part that he vowed to never make again; so it wasn't right that the boy skipped breakfast, too. Shaking him slightly, he said, "Hey, what do you say we go and have some breakfast? I'm sorry I didn't come get you for dinner last night. I... I kinda didn't notice because I got scared last night and..." He shook his head. "That's no excuse. I'm sorry I didn't come get you and that I didn't check on you to make sure you've gone to bed. Those are two other things that won't happen again." He felt that even if he apologized till the day he died; he wouldn't be able to make up for his harsh words and actions of the other night. "Hope you've had enough snacks in the evening, at least..." He added quietly.

Tony was hungry, but not too much. "I did." He replied just as quietly and with his father's help, he stood up to go have some breakfast.

"After that, maybe you can go play with Abby? She was worried about you and I'm sure she'd love to have you around. Kate and Tim are gonna be grounded for a while." He squeezed his son's shoulder and ushered him down the stairs. Tony was still quiet and Gibbs knew it'd take more than one talk to bring the smile and life back to his face and once again, he silently cursed himself for it; but he was determined to prove it to his precious boy that he meant it when he said he was sorry and that he wouldn't hurt him again. Not deliberately. He wasn't one to apologize really, but with the way he'd screwed up, he'd apologize to Tony forever if he had to. He just hoped that Tony could find it in himself to become so playful and energetic again and soon; he was already missing Tony's smile, laughter and voice when his mouth worked a mile a minute as he talked about his day. He just hoped he hadn't ruined things beyond repair.

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The End...

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A/N: That's it for this one. The next chapter will have a new storyline.

Let me know what you think?

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I don't own the show and its characters and all mistakes are mine.