Previously:
They're not sure how long they just sat there hugging, oblivious to everything around, everyone around them; but there was someone off to the side who stood watching them.
No, this can't be happening. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Ashley is at her locker after school, packing up her books, when Kurt and Mercedes come up to her and talk about how she should come and join Glee club. At first Ashley was hesitant because she knows Noah is in the club but one look at Kurt and Mercedes and she finds herself agreeing to come along.
On their way to Glee Kurt decides to ask the question he's been waiting to ask since lunch, "So Ashley, how do you know Karofsky?"
"I grew up with him. Mostly I would just hang out with Noah and Finn but sometimes Dave would join us too." She looks to her two companions and adds, "He isn't such a bad guy you know. He may act tough and bully people but that's not the real David."
Kurt and Mercedes share a disbelieving look but choose not to comment on it. "So did you two ever date?" Mercedes asks.
"Who? Me and Dave?" Ashley asks, completely caught off-guard by Mercedes' question. "Yeah, Finn mentioned that he thought you two were a couple before you left Lima." Ashley smiles at that, "Finn likes to think he knows what's going on but has never been good at noticing subtleties, heck even obvious signs go over his head sometimes." Kurt and Mercedes laugh at Ashley's spot on description of Finn.
"So you two never dated then" Kurt says, part statement, part question.
"No, never. We're just friends, and always will be just friends." Ashley thinks she sees relief wash over the two of them. If only they knew the truth.
When the three of them walk into the choir room, they are greeted with a chorus of hellos from everyone. Ashley risks a glance at Noah who is sitting next to Santana, she meets his gaze but she can't hold it for long and quickly looks away and sits beside Kurt.
Puck wasn't surprised to see Ashley walk into the choir room; he always knew how great of a singer she was, it was only a matter of time before someone else found out. As kids they would put on shows all the time, Puck on guitar (the only thing his Dad left him), Finn on drums (Puck's mom's pots and pans) and Ashley would sing. They had their own little band and it was one of the happier times in Puck's childhood. Hell, any time spent with Ashley was a happy time for Puck.
Mr. Schuester was the last one to arrive, as usual, and when he came in he had his 'I have another great assignment' look on his face. I wonder what it is this time Puck thought bitterly. He didn't really want to be here, don't get him wrong he liked Glee (not that he would tell anyone that, he was a badass after all), and he likes being near Ashley but after seeing her and Karofsky together he can't stop picturing them hugging on the bleachers and it makes him sick. What the fuck does he have that I don't?
"Okay everyone," Mr. Schuester said, interrupting Puck's thoughts, "I have a great idea for an assignment for this week." Schue looked around at everyone in the room taking in their reactions and noticed Ashley. "Well it looks like we have a new member with us today." Everyone looked toward Ashley who visibly blushed. "This is perfect actually because you're the one who inspired me to come up with this week's assignment."
"I did?" "Yeah! When Finn told me you moved back here from Toronto I thought, why not dedicate this week to looking at different Canadian music artists. I know we had a 'Bieber Experience' already but he isn't the only Canadian singer out there, there are plenty of other great musicians, both mainstream and otherwise. So, I will be splitting all of you into groups, two groups of five and one group of four and you will..."
"Um Mr. Schue" Rachel interrupted. Schue put his hand on his forehead in exasperation and answered, "Yes Rachel."
"As the co-captain of this club I think it is only fair to have any new members perform a song and audition like each of us had to do." Everyone turns to Rachel in annoyance.
"You're right Rachel, it is only fair to have Ashley audition," Mr. Schue turns to Ashley then, "Do you have a song that would like to sing?" Everyone's eyes were on Ashley again and she shifts uncomfortably, "Um..." Mr. Schuester senses her uneasiness and suggests she think about it for a minute as he reads off the groups for the assignment. Ashley relaxes a bit at this and nods her head.
"Okay so the first group will be Finn, Kurt, Rachel, Santana and Puck." Santana is about to protest being in a group with the hobbit when Puck speaks up first.
"Uh, Mr. Schue? Could I be on my own this week?" Mr. Schuester seems to consider this for a minute and finally relents to Puck's request because it's not often the mohawked teen asks for solo's and he wants to encourage all of his students to break out of their comfort zone.
Puck seems slightly shocked that Mr. Schue gave in so easily but is happy that he'll finally get a chance to tell Ashley how he feels; and convince her that Karofsky is a complete ass-hat and she should be with him not that other loser. Puck isn't the type of guy to express his feelings openly so maybe using someone else's words will give Puck the courage to man up and actually admit his feelings for Ashley aloud.
Santana seems even more pissed about her group members now that Puck has decided to bail on her. "Way to leave me with the hobbit, her dumb merry sidekick and Porcelain" Santana grits out beside Puck, but all he does is shrugs and tries to give her an apologetic smile but it comes off as more of smirk than anything. What can he say? Puck does not do apologetic.
As Mr. Schue names off the next group, which consists of Quinn, Lauren, Artie, Mike and Sam, Artie who is on the other side of Puck as Santana but a row below them looks at Puck and tries to get his attention. Puck notices Artie's stare and bends over asking what his deal is.
"I was hoping maybe I could partner up with you to do the assignment this week. We haven't hung out much since I stopped being your community service project and I assume you want to sing a song to Ashley and I want to sing one for Tina so thought it would be cool to team up."
Puck looks angry, "What do you know about me and Ashley?" he seethes.
Artie has a deer in the headlights look and tries to come up with something that won't anger the very large and muscular jock further. "I uh, just saw the way you two looked at each other when she walked in to Glee today. Like there's some feelings that both of you won't admit, or something, and I just thought, you know, maybe I could help."
The anger in Puck seemed to subside, slightly, and Artie looked relieved. "Fine," Puck ground out. Artie smiled and raised his hand before asking to be partnered with Puck. Mr. Schuester looked between the two boys baffled at the request but agreed to let them do a duet.
"So I guess that leaves Tina, Mercedes, Ashley and Brittany as the last group." Schue looked pleased with himself. "So now that we've established who's working with whom," he looks toward their newest member, "Have you decided on a song Ashley?"
"Yeah, I have," she mumbles quietly. To her right, Kurt gives a reassuring smile and says that she'll do just fine and not to be nervous, Mercedes leans forward beside Kurt and nods in agreement.
I wish I had as much faith in me as those two did, Ashley thought to herself, but she pulled herself up from her chair and went over to the band to tell them her song choice.
Ashley was feeling many different things since she first walked into McKinley today, especially about her first conversation with Noah since they stopped talking to one another, correction: since he stopped talking to me. She wanted to let all her feelings out and finally let Noah know how his abrupt halt to their friendship really affected her. She was angry yes, and let Noah know that this morning, but she was more sad than anything. She missed their late night conversations, his infectious laugh, the way he could always make her smile when she was feeling down. But most of all she simply missed just being with him, whether they talked or just sat in a comfortable silence, she just liked the way she felt when she was in the same room as him.
She stood in the center of the room and signalled for the band to start the music. Ashley was nervous, she wasn't really sure of Noah's feelings for her or how he would react to her song but it was too late to turn back now so she took a deep breathe, kept her eyes downcast and began to sing.
In your brown eyes, walked away
Ashley looked up at Noah then, staring directly into his eyes, pouring all her emotions into the song.
In your brown eyes, couldn't stay
In your brown eyes, you watch her go
And turn the record on
And wonder what went wrong
What went wrong
If everything was everything
But everything is over
Everything could be everything
If only we were older
Guess it's just a silly song about you
And how I lost you
And your brown eyes
Puck listens to the song, sees the emotion in Ashley's eyes, and can't help but feel disappointed in himself. If he wasn't such a coward and told her how he felt about her before she left, she wouldn't be singing this song to him trying to choke back tears. But Puck was afraid, afraid of losing his best friend if she didn't feel the same, afraid that if she liked him back that the distance would be too much, but most of all he was afraid that he wasn't good enough for her. Then in one of her last emails she talked about a guy she started dating and I guess you could say Puck got jealous, real jealous. That's why he went to Quinn that night and slept with her, he was angry and upset and just needed someone, anyone, to make him feel better; that was the night Quinn got pregnant.
Ashley couldn't look at him anymore, even though he broke her heart she will always love him, and it hurts.
In your brown eyes, I was feeling low
'cause they're brown eyes and you never know
Got some brown eyes, but I saw her face
Ashley looks up again but not at Noah. She looks anywhere else but at him.
I knew that it was wrong
So baby, turn the record on
Play that song
Where everything was everything
But everything is over
Everything could be everything
If only we were older
She tries so hard not to search him out but her eyes are drawn to him, and when she looks at him, she can't hold back her tears anymore.
Guess it's just a silly song about you
And how I lost you
And your brown eyes
Brown eyes
The music slowly fades out and Ashley turns around not wanting to look at anyone's confused stares. She furiously wipes at her eyes trying to gain some composure but her knees buckle under her and she slumps to the ground, or she would have had Noah not caught her before she hit the floor. She curls into his embrace as they now sit on the cold tiled floor and Noah just holds her and lets her cry, gently crooning words of comfort as he strokes her hair.
Ashley doesn't know how long they sat there for but when she finally stops crying and looks up she notices they're all alone, everyone must've left after her embarrassing breakdown. Great, now they all think I'm some emotional wreck, what a great first impression that was, she thought. She still had yet to look at Noah and chances a glance his way only to find him staring at her intently with something akin to the hurt and pain she feels, reflected in his eyes.
When Puck saw Ashley start to cry it hurt to know that he caused her that pain, all he wanted to do was to make it better. When she finished singing and turned away from everyone Puck was out of his seat immediately and managed to catch her just in time before she fell. Then she put her head in the crook of his neck, folded in his lap, and let out gut-wrenching sobs that tore at his heart. He didn't notice when everyone started leaving, all his attention was focused on the broken girl in his arms. Then she finally looked at him and all he could do was stare back at her, then he grabbed her face in hands and kissed her, long and hard.
Ashley was surprised when Noah kissed her but she wasn't complaining, she moaned into the kiss and deepened it, needing to be as close to Noah as possible.
They broke apart only because they needed to catch their breath, but they never let go of each other; Ashley with her arms around Noah's neck and Noah's arms around Ashley's waist.
Puck had to know what was going on between her and Karofsky, he can't be the guy who makes girls cheat on their boyfriends, it was a mistake with Quinn, one he sorely regret after his friendship with Finn faltered because of it. He was just thankful that the taller teen ended up forgiving him and becoming his bud again.
"I thought you were with Karofsky now," Puck mumbled, still looking into those green, almost emerald eyes.
Ashley looked at Noah confused, "Why would you think that?"
Puck sighed and looked away, "I overheard Finn tell the rest of the Glee kids that he thought you two had dated before." As much as Puck liked Ashley he did not want to admit to her that he was jealous after hearing that, Ashley didn't exactly deny being together with Karofsky after all. "Then I was, uh, walking by the football field and saw you and Karofsky hugging, figured you guys got back together or something" Puck finished, shoulders hunched and looking defeated.
Ashley unwound her arms from behind Noah's head, took his chin in her hand, and lifted his face so he was looking at her again, "I am not now nor have I ever dated David. We have only ever been friends, nothing more," then placed a chaste kiss to his lips.
Puck smiled at Ashley's words and her kiss. He looked at her from under his eyelashes and gave her a cocky grin, "Good, 'cause Puckzilla doesn't share."
Ashley couldn't contain her laughter, "Is that so?" she said with a wide smile on her face. "Funny I don't remember ever belonging to a 'Puckzilla'." Noah growled, "You're mine now Ash. No else can have you."
"Wait, I'm confused, first I was Puckzilla's now I'm yours. Which one is it?" Ashley feigned a contemplative look. Noah simply tightened his hold on her and kissed her again.
When the kiss ended, all Ashley could do was smile at how fast they went from yelling at each other this morning in the hallway to now cuddled up in the choir room making out.
Puck was one cloud nine, okay that sounded lame, but it was true nonetheless. I'm going soft he thinks to himself, but one look at the beautiful girl in his arms and he can't seem to care anymore of how un-badass he may look to someone walking by the open door. Puck brought his hand up to wipe Ashley's hair from her face when she suddenly grabbed his hand, but it was too late. He saw them, again.
To tell you the truth Puck forgot all about the markings on Ashley's forehead. He was so caught up in knowing she was back and trying to find a way to win her over that it simply slipped his mind. Now that he's seen them for a second time, Puck became furious all over again, "What the hell Ash? What are these scars in your head?"
Ashley tried to stand up and get away from Puck's heated stare but he wasn't having that, he simply held on tighter and kept her firmly planted on the ground between his legs. "No, you are not getting away this time. Now tell me what happened to you, why do you have all those scars on your forehead?" he tried to make his voice gentler as he could see Ashley's panicked expression.
He hated seeing her like this, as if she was afraid of him. Puck would never hurt Ashley, never. So he told her so, "You know I would never hurt you, right?" Ashley simply nods but doesn't look at him. This time he grabs her chin and lifts her face to his, "You can tell me, it's me, No-No." Ashley smiles at her childhood nickname for him, the one he absolutely hated.
At Noah's unwavering gaze, Ashley's smile falters, "It's not just my secret to tell Noah." "I don't understand." Ashley takes a deep breath and decides to just come out with it; she knows Noah won't give up otherwise. "If I tell you, you have to promise me you won't tell anyone, not even Finn. No one can know about this. Alright?" "Yeah, yeah of course. Your secret will be safe with me." He brushed away a stray tear that Ashley didn't even knew had fallen.
"Well, you know my younger brother Joshua right?" "Yeeaah," Puck replies, not really knowing where this is going, "Well, he's gay." Ashley states, as if that explains everything.
"So? Hummel's gay, it's not that big of a deal, and how does this explain your scars." She looks at Puck confused, "Hummel?" "Er, Kurt I mean." "Oh, right. I kind of guessed he was gay." Puck chuckles, "Yeah I guess he doesn't really hide it too well." "Nor should he have to Noah!" "Hey, hey," Puck raises his arms in defence, "I didn't mean anything by it I was just saying."
Ashley looks down guiltily, "Sorry, this is just really hard for me to talk about." "Hey, don't worry about it; if you don't want to tell me now that's cool you don't have to." "No I want to tell you. Joshua and my mom are the only other people who know, we didn't even tell my dad. He didn't react well to Josh coming out, especially when he started dating another guy. If he found out about what really happened to me, he probably would have tried to hurt him." "Well I'm here whenever you're ready."
Ashley looks up at Noah and asks if they could maybe find a more comfortable place to sit and talk. He stands up and takes her hand, then leads her to sit down on a chair. They sit beside each other and Noah takes Ashley's hands in his, waiting for her to start telling her story.
Ashley tells Noah about her brother Joshua and his boyfriend Darren, and how they were bullied at school for being gay. The two of them would get harassed on a daily basis and it got to the point where Josh decided to leave and become home-schooled by their mom. Then one day at school Darren, who had decided to stay, was being thrown around out by the football field by a bunch of jocks. Ashley recalls that the harassment had never turned physical before then, so when she saw what was happening she had to step in and do something. She confronted the guys pushing Darren around not really thinking before she did as to how she was going to help him all by herself.
Ashley pauses and tries to steady her breathing which had become a bit erratic, while Noah sat quietly waiting for her to calm down, rubbing gentle circles on her back. She finally got her breathing under control and started talking again, "I didn't even see the broken bottle until it was too late. One of them swung their arm and it connected with my head." Just then a sob broke out of Ashley that she was desperately trying to hold in. Noah gathered her in his arms, pulled her onto his lap, and rocked her back and forth running his hands up and down her spine. "Shhh, it's okay, I'm here. No one's going to hurt you anymore. I won't let them."
"I was so scared Noah. I was on the ground bleeding, Darren was crouched over me trying to stop it and everyone was just standing around laughing. I didn't know what they would try to do next, I didn't want them to hurt Darren I had to protect him, he was my little brother's boyfriend. I guess they heard people coming because next thing we knew they all took off like a bat out of hell. When someone found us a few minutes later Darren and I lied and said I fell and hit my head on the bleachers. No one even suspected it was a lie."
"Why didn't you tell someone about it? Those guys could've gotten expelled for what they did to you." "Like I said, I was scared. We had no proof of what they did; there were no other witnesses. If we accused them and they got off, they wouldn't just forget that. They would try to come after us again. I mean I could handle it if it was just me, but I would never forgive myself if they did something to Darren, if they hurt him, or worse."
Puck always knew how protective Ashley was of Josh, and if this Darren guy was important to her brother, then he was important to Ashley too. Ashley has always been such a selfless person, always putting others before herself, and that's one of the things Puck loves about her.
"So what happened after that? Did they bother you and Darren again?" Puck asked.
"They didn't have a chance to. After the incident Darren's parents thought it would be best if he go live with his Aunt and Uncle in New York. Josh and Darren didn't want to be apart but they knew it was for the best. As for me, mom pulled me out of school and started homeschooling me too. Then a few weeks later her and dad got into yet another fight, but it was worse this time. The next day mom, Josh and I packed up our things and took off. We came back to Lima because mom's family is still here and they've been helping us out, getting us back on our feet."
Puck didn't know what to say, he was never good at the whole comforting thing. So he gently kissed her forehead, making sure to Kiss each scar, as a way to say that he loved her no matter what happened or how she looked. "I'll keep you safe, I promise" Puck whispered in her ear and Ashley believed him. She knew her No-No wouldn't let anything like that happen to her again. "And your brother too," he added.
At this, Ashley stiffened in Noah's hold. "There's no need. Josh isn't coming to McKinley. He's going to stay at home and continue getting homeschooled." At Noah's confused expression Ashley went on, "Lima is a lot smaller than Toronto Noah, significantly so," "You don't think I know that?" he interrupted. "Yeah well, we didn't want to risk him getting bullied again, or having the same thing that happened to Darren and I to happen to him. Besides Josh didn't want to come here anyway, he happily agreed to continue to be homeschooled." Ashley sighs, "I hate that he feels the need to hide who he is but it's what he wants."
"As long as he's happy right," Noah says and Ashley smiles, "Yeah, as long as he's happy."
They stayed in a comfortable silence for a while, Ashley leaning into Noah's embrace, her cheek on his shoulder and his head resting atop hers. It was getting late and they should probably head out soon but neither of them wanted to move just yet. When the night janitor finally came in and said they had to leave, Ashley got up off Noah's probably numb legs and grabbed their bags. Noah however didn't care that he had no feeling in his legs, he was just happy to be with Ashley again. When he felt his legs were almost back to normal and he could stand without them turning to jell-o, he got up, took Ashley's hand and together they walked out of the school to the parking lot.
The next day at school Noah and Ashley entered school much the same as they exited it yesterday, hand in hand. Whenever any of the glee members noticed them holding hands or giving small gentle kisses to one another all they could was smile. They seemed happy and it was nice to see a positive change in Puck, though he had been slowly changing since he joined Glee club.
However, not all good things can last. After fourth period Azimio came up to Ashley holding a familiar iced beverage in his hand. Not being familiar with what a 'slushie facial' is Ashley saw no threat when a dark-skinned letterman jacket wearing jock approached her at her locker. She remembered him as one of David's friend when she confronted him in the caf yesterday and was just about to ask him his name when a bitter cold syrupy liquid collided with her face. She was stunned; she didn't know what to do.
"That's for whatever you said to Karofsky. He's been ignoring me since he went off with you at lunch yesterday, then today he came up and said he didn't want to be friends no more. What did you say to him you little bitch?" At this point Azimio was in Ashley's face.
Santana was nearby when this was happening and stepped between the angry jock and the flustered and still in shock Ashley. "Hey Azimio, why don't you back off before I tell everyone that it's not always true what they say about black men and the size of their dick." Azimio looks pissed and is about to defend himself when Santana speaks up again, "Don't try and deny it, we Cheerios talk. I know all about your little problem." Then she stalks off with Ashley to the nearest washroom.
Karofsky turned the corner and saw his former best friend with an empty cup in hand and Ashley dripping in an all too familiar purple liquid heading off with Santana. Karofsky sees red. He marches up to Azimio demanding to know what happened. When the other jock has the audacity to smirk and say that that whore deserved it, Karofsky can't hold back any longer and punches Azimio square in the jaw.
I can't believe he just hit me, Azimio thought. That's it! The bitch is going down.
Song used:
Brown Eyes - Lady Gaga
Feedback: Please feel free to read and review. :)
Much love!
-PF