Taxing Time RPG

by Mrs Wizzard

Terry Pratchett Message Board RPG, probably our most interesting one yet! The tax office is open once again in Ankh-Morpork, and none are too happy about it, all new characters with compelling side plots!

2. Chapter 2

After her strange encounter, Mirabell had decided that she was too tired to find the tax office. She had almost been to tired to shift herself out of the alley, but she dreaded to think what would happen if she stayed the night there. This is Ankh-Morpork after all...

She had eventually found a suitably central inn, and explained that she needed to board there cheaply. Since she still looked like an assassin, the landlord agreed without question.
Sweet!
Meera went up to her room, collapsed straight into bed and fell asleep instantly.

'Tweet! Tweet-tweet!'
It was morning. The birds outside twittered noisily.
'Ah shut up!' Meera shoved her head under the pillow.
'Tweet tweet chirp tweet!'
'Urghhhh!'
'Twit twit warble!'
'Arghhhhh!' A pillow went shooting out of the window past the bewildered chattering birds. Shocked, they flew away.

Mirabell consulted her watch.
Disbelieving, she checked it again.
Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! I'm late!
Mirabell grabbed her clothes. They were all black anyway, so no matter what she chose to wear, it would look all right. She threw on her clothes and ran towards the tax office. It turned out to be just a street away.

Meera jogged stealthily to the office and peered round the door.
'Sorry I'm late! I'm Mirabell Wren, but you can call me Meera if you want. ..Um It's up to you.
Yes, so... Have you started anything yet?'

"Ah! Come in ..Meera. You're just in time, we haven't really started anything, just working out some details."

Illyah directed her to her desk and showed her the rest of the office.

"You have already met the others? Nathan, Sasha and Candice?"

As he walked her over to the map on the wall, he said, "We were just thinking that dividing up the city amongst the team would be a good use of our time."

He explained about the priority assignments and the apparent loss of tax money going back gods knew how far.

"Apart from getting back up to speed on the caollecting part - we'll also need to find out where the money has been going. I have no ideas so far-"

Yes you do.

"I...er..."

You thought of it the first time you came in here.

*Cough*

"I have wondered, maybe, about why the entire tax team was replaced in one swoop. The tax coordinator, sure - but the entire team as well? Doesn't seem right somehow."

"So we're like debt collectors then?" Candice was beginning to understand. "But instead of collecting what people owe daddy, we're collecting what people owe the city?"

Things started to fall into place for Candice, and she looked at Nathan. "You're going to walk into the Seamstresses Guild and ask for money! Instant suicide." She laughed. "Those girls have a vicious streak."

She started lisiting properly to what was being said.

"How do you work out how much each person owes? And why not start by targeting the 'average' citizen? Theres more of them."

Then the allowance was mentioned, and Candice looked shocked. "We have to...pay...for clothes? Anyway, all the government officials i've met were ill fitting ugly suits with inapropriate ties. No Thanks, not for me."

She then placed her head back down on the desk, but looked up almost immediatly when another girl walked in. She HAD to be an assassin, from the way she was dressed. The girl was introduced, and then the topic of conversation turned to the the fact that the entire tax department had been replaced. It all sounded familiar to Candice, she was sure her father had had a hand in it, but she decided to refrain from commenting, and went back to sleep.

Sasha stared at Candice. Had she really just heard such self absorbed ignorance ?

"You are unbelievable! Start with the average citizen because there's more of them?" She thought about explainning to this rich girl a little bit about the distrubution of wealth in the city and how a huge percentage of it belonged to people like Candices 'daddy' but decided against wasting her breath.

Sasha jerked a thumb at Candice and spoke to Illyah

"Just don't pair me up with the air-head if we have to collaborate on any assignments okay?" She spoke slowly to Candice "Coll-ab-or-ate, that means 'working together' "

At the mention of the allowance Sasha's grin returned, leant against her desk with her arms folded and asked the obvious questions

"Cool, how much do we get and when do we get it?"

Then Illyah mention reciepts and Sasha sighed "Okay, okay. But we still get to choose what we buy right?"

Candices refusal was mumbled from the desk where she lay in an obvious hangover. Sasha just rolled her eyes, then raised a hand in greeting to the new arrival who peeked around the door. It was obvious what this new arrival was, Sasha looked sidelong at Nathan remembering his visit from the Assassins back in the cell. This could be interesting

Illyah mentioned the previous team, Sasha raised her eyebrows and nodded

"That's interesting all right, I expect there was a few un-official taxes being collected, such as 'new coach for the headman' tax and 'new gold necklace for the misuss' tax..."

Or perhaps something a bit worse? She wondered on that for a moment...

Illyah looked at Candice while addressing the group.

These aren't my rules per se; Lord Vetinari will be hearing of our accomplishments and our failures without me having to say a word. I'm sure he'll also be told all sorts of little details about our operation as well, so yes, you will wear appropriate dress."

He'd known the issue of the allowance would spark some interest. "The Patrician has set aside separate accounts for each of you. I have envelopes for each of you. As I have said, he'll know everything you...we do. That's where the receipts come in."

Illyah wasn't in the business of telling people what to do with their own money, but he'd never worked directly for Vetinari before.

"Somedays you may have to follow a target through the city unnoticed, other days you might find yourself sitting in on board meetings or speaking with the accountants of the guilds. In each case, looking the part is half the battle."

Without looking at anyone in particular, Illyah added, "I also don't have to tell you that weapons are not permitted under any circumstances. All we need is a complaint from one of the cities finest that he or she was robbed of their money, and all seven gates of the dungeon dimension will open up on top of us."

No weapons? Come on now, be reasonable.

He had grown up in a somewhat sheltered environment, but Illyah knew they'd go off and do what they wanted regardless of what he said. He had never been the command type, another reason he liked supply so much. But, at least he'd be able to say later that he'd told them.

Walking over to his desk, Illyah pulled out a stack of envelopes and passed them out. "This represents ten percent of your total allowance. The rest is in the account marked on the bottom of the envelope. Your pay will be added to that account every two weeks. Once your allowance is gone, the rest you spend will be your own money - so be careful."

He wasn't sure why, but suddenly he felt very fatherly toward this bunch. "Look, I know this is all new to us, but a government job isn't all that bad. You can do alright by this. Just do me a favor okay? Keep the trouble down to a minimum and I'll do everything I can to keep Vetinari off our backs."

Oh suuuure.

Kayla looked at Mrs Berger blankly, painfully aware of the awkward silence. Her brashness was surprising, and Kayla was a little taken aback by the matter-of-fact manner in which she was suddenly accepted. Blinking rapidly, she tried to formulate an answer.

"I'm... erm... Ok"

overnight visitors, what does she take me for?

Mrs Berger bustled away, nattering about all the chores that she would have to do.

"I won't expect you to clean any of the boarders rooms, but The kitchen, hall and main room will need a thorough dusting and cleaning every other day. Mrs Everson, that's the cook, has been a sickly recently so if you know anything about cooking that would be great, but the bow should be back soon so you won't be alone..."

Another thought crossed her mind as she looked at the broom offered, and the dustpan and brush behind her.
One handed should be fun, wonder how I'll get round this one?

"Where do I sleep?"

Mrs Berger was the one to look taken aback this time., cut off in the middle of her flow.

"Did I not say? well down here with the boy."
She indicated a staircase to the side of the broom cupboard tha disappeared into the darkness.
"I'll have a curtain put up for you tomorrow, and dinner is the soup that's on the table in the main room. I'll be off now, You'll be fine for the night. I'm the first door upstairs, but unless the house is burning down you'll get it in your ear if you disturb me. Have a nice night!" and with that she shuffled off along the corridor and up the stairs.

Kayla gazed despondently down the stairs and started down. As her eyes adjusted to the gloom, she saw that it wasn't the hole that she had thought it to be. There was a straw bed in one corner of the surprisingly large room, with a pile of clothes at the head for a pillow. the signs of the normal occupant of the room were everywhere, Clothes and wood shavings littered the floor. Kayla wondered who this 'boy' was, but night was drawing in and the light was failing, so she wandered over to the bed and collapsed on top, letting the day wash over her and send her into a troubled sleep.

***

The forest was closing in. They were all there, with their sticks and stones. She was confused and alone, her whole body ached and her eyes were swimming with tears. She ran and ran and ran and ran...

***

Kayla woke slowly with the dawn, stretching and yawning as she watched the sun climb fro behind her eyelids. The open door let in the low sun that shone through the window and Kayla turned away as she forced her eyes open, only to see a pair of feet right in front of her. Struggling up, her eyes ascended the figure only to see a young boy, probably around eight, glaring at her.

"tha's ma bed, an' ya sittin' in i'."

His voice seemed deeper than it should be, but his vicious gaze stirred her out of the bed and onto her feet. Her legs were a little shaky, one nights sleep wasn't going to revive her from yesterday's fun, although in the night her bandage had fallen off to reveal a clean scab. there was very little pain now, though probing it gingerly showed that it was still painful when touched. The boy saw the movement and looked down at her hand, his eyes going wide when he saw.

"what...who...when...? Kayla held up her hand to stop further questions, to ask a few of her own. As she had stood the initial faintness had worn off, and the sleep had reinvigorated her so that all her old confidence was returning.

"So I assume you're the boy that Mrs Berger talks about. What's you're name and how'd you end up here with that old bat?" she jerked her thumb up the stairs.

"Well, I'm Ed, and Mrs Berger caught me filchin' from 'er cellar 'bout three years 'go. I ain' got no mam or pa, so she's took me under 'er roof, an' I do all the dirty work in the Boarders rooms, cleanin' their chamber pots an' all! It's punishmen' to ma thinkin', but she's good to 'er promises wiv food and board, an' she even let me use the basemen' fer ma carvin' an' stuff. It's all I 'ave from mi pa, ma chisels an' tha', an' I never would have sold I', even if the money could 'ave bought me the board tha' I get 'ere. So come on, I've told ya my piece, yer turn now"

He appeared to have said all that in one breath, and his inquisitive glare now aimed at her was just as fierce as the aggression he showed earlier.
you don't do anything by halves do you
Kayla started to fill him in on yesterdays events as he started to tug her towards the stairs and through the winding passaged to the kitchen. Kayla spotted Sasha making her way out, but decided that she had pushed her luck with the woman, so refrained from waving or calling out. In the kitchen she spotted the cold soup on the table and immediately felt the stab of guilt from no eating it last night. Watching it now her stomach rumbled once more, and despite the weak and cold nature of it, she fell on the soup with alarming speed, finishing her story in between mouthfuls.

Once she had finished, she wiped her mouth delicately with the corner of her shirt and got down to business.

"So where do I start?"

Nathan ignored Candice's comments, Sasha's description of the girl seemed succinct and fitting. As soon as the assassin entered Nathan was immediately cautious, there was no obvious change in him, but his muscles tensed and he made sure he did not have his back to her. The Guild had two failed contracts on him, he didn't know if this one knew about them or the missing members, but he wasn't about to find out the hard way. Making sure he always kept a discrete eye on the newcomer Nathan continued listening to what Illyah had to say. When the subject of their salaries and allowances were brought up, he felt all ears in the room prick. He supposed the sort of people that they were, they often wanted to find out where they were going to get paid and how much. As Illyah mentioned the previous tax team Nathan realised that he had been trying not to think about that particular subject.

"Perhaps they all took early retirement?"

He said hopefully, although he doubted it very much.

Tracking targets was not a problem, but a board meeting? Nathan began to wonder whether a board meeting was worth staying out of prison for. When Illyah mentioned weapons Nathan became aware of the weight of his knife against his chest, definitely re-assuring.

"Well, the only weapon I have is my wit, and before anyone says anything, as doubtless they will, I am obviously not very well armed."

He flashed one of those quick smiles and took the proffered envelope. A brief glance and simple calculation later Nathan's eyes widened.

"What? I make more than this in a d-"

His eyes wandered over the figures and he did his best to get himself back under control.

"This can't be right, I don't think I've ever seen such a small number."

He suddenly realised how lucrative not doing an honest days work was.

Sasha made no comment on the weapon prohibition, she never went anywhere without her knife and she wasn't about to start now no matter where the orders had come from. There was no sense in telling Illyah that though so she simply smiled at Nathans quip about his wits and stayed silent.

She wondered if the comment about robbery had been aimed at her, nevertheless she kept a completely nonchalant expression and simply held out her hand for her envelope. Eyeing the figures before her eyes she looked up

"This is it huh? Nathan's right, this can't be right" she bit off the rest of the comment whihc tried to leap from her tongue

Whoever said crime doesn't pay didn't know what they were talking about! I make more than this in a bad week

"Board meetings? Following people I can do but..." she stopped, she was stuck with this job and the duties that came with it. That didn't mean she had to like it though, even if it was her own fault she had ended up here

Brushing her hair she sighed to emphasise her displeasure and stood up with folded arms from her slouch against the desk

"Okay then boss, how about we divvy up the territories then we can go get ourselves kitted out? When we come back you can give us our assignments. "

Isaiah Barter of the farmer's guild walked homebound down the street, smelling strongly of soggy fur, and animal manure. Though walking nonchalantly as he made his way home, he was fully aware of the figure stalking him from roughly a hundred yards back. Veurteilen, meanwhile, was grumbling to herself

This man vill be tricky, she thought, he's alrady detected me, even on zis crowded street she sighed inwardly, to herself, it is not often zat i must deal vith a smart vone, vut I know just how to deal vith his type

Verurteilen steered herself out of the crowd, and moved herself to the other side of the street, leaving Isaih relieved, thinking that his predator had given up, and they might as well, as surely no one could get to Isaiah that easily

"Excuse me, sir?" the voice echoed from the opposite side of the street, and caused Isaiah to turn his head. Apparently, he was being adressed to by the disembodied voice, but he soon matched it up with..a rather attractive young woman, dressed in a black shirt and trousers, who was making eye contact with him

Isaiah stopped in his tracks, ignoring the various people who bumped into him as they tried to maneuver themselves around him. The girl had long brunette hair that rained across her shoulders, and down to her lower back, and she stood with her legs crossed, and her hands held behind her back, and her silvery eyes were giving him a worried and frightened expression

Isaiah pointed to himself, to make sure that such a woman would be adressing a man looking like him, and, smiling at her nod, he made his way to her side of the street

"Is there anything I can help you with, miss?" he said, to the young woman who was just slightly over eye level with himself. She looked into his eyes, and nodded again

"It is just zat," she said, shyly, "I am new to zis big city, and you look as if you know your vay around"

"I would be happy to help you, ma'am," Isaiah went on, deepening his voice, considerably, "just where is it that you need directions to?"

"The city morgue," she said, solemnly, Isaiah looked a bit confused

"Why would you ever want to go there?" he said

"Oh, I do not vish to go zere," Verurteilen said, and she brought her hidden hand around, and implanted the knife into Isaiah's chest, and brought it back out, once again

"I just vanted to make sure zat you know vhere you vere headed," she finished, and replaced the knife into her cloak, as Isaiah hit the ground, stone dead, and then she walked away, tying her hair back, and putting her hat back on. As she threw it away, and over her shoulder, the little iconograph of Isaiah Barter drifted through the air, and landed beside his corpse

Illyah was used to hearing Watchmen gripe about their pay - or lack of it, but he had to realize that he hadn't bothered to look into the envelopes before he passed them out. He didn't know what any of the staff had received.

He hoped that if it was as bad as they made out, that in the future, providing they did a good job, raises or bonuses could be had.

"Sasha gets it in one. I realize trying to divvy up the city into acceptable portions may be a bit tricky, but I can go out as well to cover any excess."

Trying to show that he had no problems taking on any assignment, Illyah walked over to the map and blindly stuck a finger out.

"In fact, tomorrow I'll be making my first call on the...Fools Guild. Oh...joy."

That would teach him to be so easy going.

"Alright, how about this; Candice - take everything Hubward from Upper Broadway over to Chrononhotonthologos Street; Nathan, why don't you try everything Rimward of...that street and go to Dimwell. Sasha, you get from Dimwell to Easy street...and Meera gets Dimwell to Short Street."

"That leaves me with Short to Broadway and the Isle of Gods, plus anything that any of you need help with. Sounds good?"

There was a long silent pause once Illyah had finished, Nathan's brain was currently playing the conversation and divvying up territories back to him as he tried to recover from the shock of seeing how much he was getting paid. He caught up pretty quickly and glanced at the map.

"Okay, dividing the city up is a good idea, but we have a big problem. There are five of us," he looked at Candice "well four and a half. Has anyone actually seen the size of the map."

He waved his arm in front of the wall hanging to further draw their attention to it.

"It's not really something you can pop off and walk before lunch, not to mention one of us has got the shades," he decided not to look who it had been "and one person going into their? Unarmed? I hate to say it but we might be safer in prison and not a great deal poorer." He added bitterly.

He went silent and looked at the map, finally he spoke again, slowly at first as if the plan was forming as he spoke.

"Some parts of the city are going to need two of us, just for safety's sake, like the shades and some of the more…difficult guilds. If we are going to be focusing on the larger players then we should probably all head towards various guilds today, they have the most money by far. The richest guilds, I would imagine, are the Thieves, Assassins, Lawyers, Bankers, Merchants and perhaps even the Beggars guild, as strange as that may sound. I'm sure the accountants guild is one that we're going to have to say, you owe us this, we don't care what your books say, pay us or….we'll burn your guild down?"

He looked at Illyah questioningly, as though he might have gone to far, but just checking.

"Anyway these are going to be difficult places to get money out of and dangerous ones potentially. These are, in my opinion, what we should be focusing on at the moment. Also the post office use golems, is there any reason we can't do the same?"

Nathan had to solve problems every day when trying to get a hold of a particularly difficult item, this was a big problem, but when you had the backing of the government it might make it easier. Of course they could ask the watch for help, but a part of him rebelled at the thought and he kept quiet

Candice was hurt by the fact that they found her to be a self absorbed airhead, but kept her mouth shut. Let them think that. Too bad the guilds were going to say the exact same things she had just said, any petty insults werent going to help them there.

The envelope containing the expenses money was placed on Candices desk, and she opened it and had a look at how much, all the while hearing complaints from Sasha and Nathan as to how little it was. Considering neither appeared to have any other job but this, it seemed odd that they acted like they were used to much higher figures, which was another interesting bit of information she filed away for later. They were right though, it wasnt much money. But money wasnt something she had to worry about, so she just dropped the envelope into her bag.

Candice noticed bitterly whe n the assignments weere handed out that she'd been given probably the biggest area. But hten the conversation turned to them all working together on the guilds, so she didnt comment on that either. She jsut sat back and listened as once again her intelligence was insulted.

"What we could do.." Candice couldnt believe she'd even spoken up. LIke they'd even bother to listen to her. But she continued regardless. "...is go in, speak to them politly, and explain the benefits of doing so. if they refuse, who cares? We'll just go back tomorrow, with a few trolls or gollums, and explain politly again. Then if they still say no,we'll repossess their things. Anyway, im sure the rate the guilds tax there members is a lot higher than what we tax them, and there must be laws somewhere that relate to how much they can actually charge..."

Sasha was silent for a moment as she worked out her territory. As Nathan spoke Sasha put up her hand, her usual grin now gone without a trace.

"That would be me who's got the Shades. You know, I'm beginning to find the idea of the Tanty quite an attractive alternative". Her expression made it clear that she was far from joking. She nodded at the rest of Nathan's idea, still not smiling

"Sounds sensible enough and Golems are definitly a good idea. And if I'm going to have to deal with the Shades I'm going to need back-up." Sasha quite blatantly pointed at Candice not caring how rude it may seem, when it came to staying alive Sasha didn't mind insulting a few people "But not her. I want someone who knows how to watch my back and who can handle themselves."

She gestured to the map and shrugged "But back on topic, I agree that the best plan is to use today to approach some of the richer Guilds...Can we get hold of some Golems? They would certainly add some weight to our presence"

When Candice spoke up Sasha gave her a narrowed eye glare

"A minute ago you didn't even know what Tax was."

Illyah could already see the dynamic working amongst the team and figured this was going to be an interesting office to work in.

"Alright, I guess we have some things to think about. I don't know too much about the golems and even less about the post office, so if anyone can make that happen for us I'd be appreciative. I'll send word to Vetinari that we're looking into that and maybe he can grease the wheels for us."

What you need are some enforcers - people that can go in and make someone see the light. In your favor ofcourse.

"I'd rather not have to use...threats...to get our point across."

Some people only listen to threats. Being polite is a sign of weakness to them.

"But if the sight of a golem, maybe just the sight of one, is able to nudge someone into being more cooperative, then fine."

Just the sight of one - no more.

But that could work couldn't it? Was that it? Have a golem show up on your doorstep with a bunch of tax collectors and, well, the implication would be enough - right?

See? You do have a sneaky side after all.

Illyah saw the sense in that line of thinking and although it kind of shocked him to realize he had warmed up to it so quickly, he went on with it.

All he had to do - they had to do - was find a golem, any golem, the thing could be a tree trimmer for all he cared - and just show it off as being of theirs . The average citizen wouldn't know - in fact nobody could guess it. But the idea would be planted.

"Tell you what, if someone can get me in touch with someone with a few golems available, I'd appreciate an interview as soon as possible."

"You're right." Candice replied. "I dont know anything about tax. But i do know about debt, and that methods always worked for daddy... and the guilds charge for their services to their members. Thats tax, yeh? Im so very sorry if i got it wrong..." Candice was right - they werent going to listen to her.

"Anyway", she added, yawning, "The laws get pretty specific when it comes to money. Take unlicenced theiving, as an example. Seems to me, tax is just government sanctioned form off theft." She looked directly at Sasha. "Sanc-tioned. That means aproval from an authority"

She then placed her head back on her desk, and was about to go to sleep. "I'll just stay like this, ok. You dont want me to be part of this, and thats fine. You enjoy working for a living..."

Nathan heard Candice but wasn't listening, his mind was already working on their man power problem. Absentmindedly Nathan put his hand on the desk, it sent up puffs of dust and for the next twenty seconds he was sneezing.

"Okay, Candice, I'm sure your father has a maid can you get her to come down and clean in her?"

He looked at the map of the city again.

"The rest of us might as well start at the deep end. Can someone find out how much our figures tell us the…Guild of Merchants owes us? I have an idea how to solve another of our problems and I will meet you all at across the road from the entrance. If I'm not there in thirty minutes, just wait longer."

Mark had realised that this could be quite an opportunity, he would now have access to places he would never have been able to get to before, this could certainly enhance his business. Without waiting for a response from the rest he disappeared out of the door to see a man about some clay.

Sasha rolled her eyes at Candices attempts at a retort

"Aww look, the bubble brain knows a big word. Did Daddy teach you that one?""

She was about to reluctantly admit though that actually the comparison to debt collecting wasn't all that far off the mark but the sudden dissapearance of Nathan took her attention instead

"Where's he...? Ah whatever, we might aswell go along with it."

It was the closest they had come to a plan of action so she walked over to one of the dust encrusted desks and began to leaf through the ledgers looking for the Guild of Merchants.

"Aha! found them. Woah! Did somone miss a decimal point? Apparantly the Guild of Merchants owes us..."

She turned the ledger round so the others could see it. There was a healthy string of zeros following the first three digits

She grinned, this could be fun after all

Mirabell went and sat down at a desk that mysteriously seemed to have her name on it. She felt as if she was back in the classroom again.

No weapons? An assassin never travels unarmed! But Meera kept quiet. There was something about this guy Illyah that meant you didn't want to disappoint him. Nevertheless she still looked disappointed at the meagre payment she would be recieving.
It's better than nothing I suppose, but this does encourage us to 'appropriate' extra tax money doesn't it? And I think that for some of us here, it might actually be an option. She looked round hard at the rest of the group.

Dimwell to short street? But that was huge! Mirabell nodded at what Nathan said.
'Teams work better, we're more vulnerable if we're spread out.'

As Nathan left to find a Golem, Meera said
'Golems won't impress everyone, I think that we're hardly in a position to threaten the guild of assassins, for example. There needs to be something more.'
Plus if I displease them, they won't take me back, and I'll be stuck with this job forever. Who knew tax-gathering would be so badly paid?

Illyah called after Nathan as he left the office, "Just a regular golem please Nathan! Nothing...messy!" He heard what Meera had said and agreed that in the future, more - er, subtle methods would be called for.

Turning to the rest, he added, "Okay, let's see what Nathan has planned. We'll need those figures for the Merchants Guild and I have the letter from Vetinari that identifies our authority to collect monies owed to the city."

He hoped that was all they'd need for their first assignment.

Looking at Candice, Illyah figured this was as good a time as any to try and settle some issues.
"I don't know exactly how you were all picked by Lord Vetinari, but I gather he would not have done so lightly. I have no problems working with any of you and considering we haven't even left the office on our first day, I don't see how we can be having...difficulties."

"Candice, you are just as much a part of this team as Sasha, Meera or Nathan until, that is, you give me reason to believe otherwise. At that time, I'll just inform his Lordship that you no longer want to work here, and I'm sure he can find re-assignment for you."

Re-assignment? Is that what they call it these days?

"I'm sure Vetinari would be most generous."

Oh, you kill me! Or her, which ever you prefer...

"I..uh *cough* think that maybe we should head out."

Illyah didn't really see why this should be so hard. He was sure that most people would be more than happy to pay their back taxes once they saw that appropriate steps were being taken to correct the oversight.

Nathan leant against a wall opposite the Guild of Merchants and leafed through a small book. He had managed to change in the time it had taken him to leave, talk to a few people and come to the meeting place, but he had still arrived before the others and he wondered what could possibly be taking them so long. His boots were new and the good kind, not the paper soled ones, his trousers were black and his shirt was a crisp white, over it he wore a high coloured three quarter jacket of navy blue, he seemed to have the extraordinary talent of looking great and still not standing out. He had run into, literally, Captain Carrot on his travels, the captain had grinned and handed him a book of city laws to do with tax. Nathan dreaded to think what Carrot considered to be bedtime reading. Nathan would also like to have said that he was throwing himself into the job, but in reality, there was something he…needed inside of the guild which had been previously inaccessible, now though he had a letter from Vetinari himself to allow him into the place and the thing was so insignificant he doubted that anyone would miss it. Standing unobtrusively by his side stood, what appeared to be a six inch high figure of a golem, which Nathan occasionally looked down at and smiled privately to himself. Okay Illyah had said a regular golem, but this was such a very small golem, he couldn't wait to try it out.

Candice was offended.

"We're having difficulties because everytime i speak my intelligence is insulted. Airhead, bubble brain, and i'm sure they've thought worse. Why should i participate if im going to be treated like that." She pulled out a little mirror, and started fixing her hair. "I want to be here, otherwise i wouldnt have shown up. Its not like i need to work. But you're right, im here for a reason."

She snappped the mirror case shut, and stood up.

"So please, stop treating me like the easy target. I've said nothing worse than what they've said about me."

She picked up her bag, and pushed in her chair.

"Yes, lets go. But can we stop for food on the way?"

Still holding the ledger Sasha looked over at Illyah and shrugged

"She's right Boss...I have been thinking much worse things"

Sasha rummaged around in the closest desk until she found a pencil and paper and began to copy the figures out for the Merchants guild, as she wrote she spoke

"I'm not here to make friends, I'm here to do a job...and on that note, it would appear that the Merchants Guild took millions of dollars last year and we saw approximately none of it so instead of worrying about the airhea..." At a sharp look from Illyah, Sasha rolled her eyes "Okay okay, Let's just go shall we?"

She handed the piece of paper with the figures on to Illyah and walked towards the door, stopping on the way to put her hand on Candices shoulder

"No hard feelings huh? I just tend to say what I think, I may be a thief but I guess the honesty had to come out somewhere" Sasha grinned and continued towards the door. As she left the office and walked toward the Guild she snapped open Candices mirror, which had inexplicably found it's way into Sasha's pocket, and examined her unruly hair

Once the others had arrived Nathan flashed them a quick smile and handed Illyah receipts.

"Here you go, for my new gear."

He nodded to the six in golem.

"I managed to get hold of a golem, his name is Spinner apparently, although he's not the chatty type. Okay, I've just been flicking through this book, it talks about what we are and are not allowed to do, we actually have quite a lot of power, I suppose we just need the backup to enforce it."

Again another quick smile and a discrete look at his new toy.

"Okay, let's try this out, does anyone know how much they owe then?"

Someone flapped a piece of paper in front of him, taking it he opened It up and nearly fell to the ground.

"Seriously? I don't think I've ever seen that much money. Okay okay…" he paused and appeared to collect himself "Right, let's go shall we?"

Without waiting for an answer he moved towards the double doors above which was the symbol of the Guild of Merchants. Looking at the others around him, Nathan knocked on the door. There was a short pause before a plate was slid back and a pair of eyes peered out at them suspiciously. The eyes must have belonged to a strangely paranoid man as they darted continuously left and right, focusing only on Nathan briefly. Finally the wandering eyes settled on him long enough to become wide.

"Here, you're that-"

Nathan cut in smoothly

"Good morning Sir, we are from the Ankh-Morpork Department of Taxation."

Nathan wasn't sure if that was their proper name, but he decided it sounded good.

"We'd like to discuss with whoever's in charge the subject of accrued arrears."

Those were both words form the book.

"What?"

Said the ping pong eyes, stopping on him again. Nathan decided to tone it down a little.

"Open up, we want to talk to your boss, you owe the city money."

The ping pong eyes became a blur, Nathan was beginning to feel a little dizzy watching them, it was like looking at a cartoon character that had just been hit on the side of the head, he wondered if the man could make them roll around as well.

" I've never heard of this 'Department of Taxation'"

Nathan turned to Illyah and took Veinari's letter, putting it through the slot.

"Our credentials, I'm sure you'll see they're all in order."

The letter was pushed back through the slit a few moments later, it had all gone very quiet. The sounds of running footsteps could be heard then, a whispered conversation and the flap opening and shutting with no less than three sets of eyes peering out at them. Finally the ping pongs appeared again.

"Look, this could be a fake right, besides this is guild property not city property. Go away."

The flap closed, Nathan did his best to restrain his excitement, he saw Illyah's thoughtful expression though and decided he should probably try again. Once more he knocked and once again the eyes appeared.

"What, I thought I told you lot to go away."

Nathan quickly rifled through the book.

"Yes, but we really need to talk to someone about all these back taxes we need to get off of you. Please can you let us in under one of the laws of taxation."

The man's eyes stopped, Nathan was so grateful.

"What law of Taxation?"

"I'm afraid" Nathan said, trying to sound as professional as possible "The exact law eludes me, but I can assure you that there is one I've seen it in this book."

"Are you making this up?" the voice said a little unsure now.

"No, it's all here, please let us in, this is my third request, if you refuse us entry we will have to use force to enter the premises."

The eyes seemed to smile and start laughing.

"How are you going to do that?"

Nathan pointed down to the small Golem. The eyes strained to looked down.

"What? With that? You must be joking, go away."

The plate closed and the laughing continued. Nathan looked over to Illyah in a silent 'Well I tried'.

"Spinner, please open the door."

The small Golem walked forwards and placed his hands on the door. At first nothing happened, then, slowly at first, a crack appeared in the door and began to extend upwards. There was a loud crack and the door split in two and disappeared, bricks from around the door fell into the empty space. As the dust cleared the small golem was standing with two very small pieces of door in his hands.

"I'm not sure how it works, but it's something like, he is not quite in the same space as we are and so he looks really small and is very portable, but he is in fact golem. It means that everything he pulls into his space will get smaller as well."

The golem threw the pieces of door windows, they suddenly expanded and slammed into the astonished ping pong eyed man who was thrown backwards and had a vase fall on him. The golem moved forwards and stamped, a crack appeared in the floor that made the doorframe groan again.

Nathan was pretending to look shocked, it was spoiled by the fact that he was trying to hide a smile.

Illyah stood for a second with his mouth wide open as his brain worked out how exactly to tell Vetinari about this.

"It's...ah..."

Seeing a small crowd growing at one end of the street, he turned and tried to assume a reassuring stance.

"It's okay...we're from the government, we're here to help."

Not getting the reaction he wanted, Illyah tried another tack, "It's just business. Nothing to see here. Keep moving along please."

Again, not a single twitch from the on-lookers.

"I say, is that Captain Carrot?"

With that, the crowd suddenly became a disinterested group of shoppers, merchants and assorted riff-raff, just out for a lovely day in Ankh-Morpork.

Turning back to Nathan, Illyah said quietly, "I did say nothing messy, right?" But the fact was, they were in. Nathan had asked nicely and warned them ahead of time and as far as golems went, the hole wasn't as big as it could have been.

"Well done however. Now, let's go and see a man about some money shall we?"

Walking along Baker street Sasha couldn't help but glance again at the figures she had written down, would the Merchants Guild actually agree to pay this much money? But then they had too didn't they? Knowing they would have a bit of muscle, okay technically it was clay, backing them up made it seem a little more plausible...

She looked up and saw Nathan standing opposite the Guild, she looked for the Golem but could see nothing, frowning slightly she walked over to him with the other. When he pointed out the tiny golem she stared at it, then began to laugh. There was just something so comical about the six inch little golem. Who in hells names were they going to scare with that?

She had handed the paper to Nathan and stood behind him and Illyah as they had spoken to the eyeballs. After listening to the exchange she watched with interest as the golem stepped forward

Once the door was in pieces Sasha whistled in approval "Wow! I guess size really doesnt matter. Well, shall we?"

She stepped into the Guild, grinning down at the man with the vase on him as she walked further inside. She looked around at the inside of the building, it was unsuprisingly well decorated with various ornaments and rugs, the main feature of the hallway was a banner hung over a set of highly polished stairs that stated the Merchants Guilds motto 'VILIS AD BIS PRETII'. She smiled to herself, much as she was opposed to the Thieves Guild, it's own motto held close to her heart and way of life.

She rubbed her hands together, actually finding this a whole lot more fun than she had though. She smiled at Nathan "That was rather impressive. So, anyone know which way to Mr Parkers office?" She walked back to the stunned man behind the door and nudged him with her foot "Hey, which way to Parkers office?" when he did nothing more than moan she bent over to look him in the eyes "Oi, I'm asking you a question, I'm a Tax officer so you have to tell me , or else I may have to find one of those tax laws that means I have to convince you to co-operate" she flashed a wicked grin and nodded toward to the tiny golem, the man eyes widened and he mumbled some directions. She patted him on the head, getting some satisfaction from the way he flinched as her hand moved "Thankyou, you've been very helpful" and stood up straight again

"Top of the stairs, second office on the right." She gestured for Illyah to go first

"After you boss"

Yes, like the lady said - after you boss.

"Well, uh, yes - shall we?"

Walking up the stairs, Illyah had to admit to himself that his stomach had a case of the butterflies.

A little nervous on the first assignment?

"A little."

Shame really. Same thing happened when you started going out on patrol as a young officer. Pity.

" *cough* Let's see if the man will listen to reason first. I wouldn't want any more holes appearing in the building prematurely."

Illyah stopped outside of the very large, very heavy, very locked door with the name PARKER on it. Just on the other side, he could make out the muffled voices of several men, in what could only be described as heated discussion. Heated, no doubt because of the arrival of the new tax team...and one golem.

Looking suddenly at Sasha, Illyah asked, "What do you think about badges? We should have badges right? Like the Watch?"

Turning back to the door, he knocked. Unfortunately the sound was not nearly as impressive as he had hoped. The door was thick as well.

"Maybe hammers as well. Big hammers."

Candice laughed at the size of the Golum, but stopped when she saw the damage he caused to the door.

"okay..."'

a crowd was starting to gather, and people started pointing at her. Several then turned and left - it wasnt like Candice to cause a scene during the day. At the mention of Captan Carrot, however, they all dissapeared.

Finally, they reached Mr Parkers office. Candice couldnt believe the commotion going on inside.

"If paying tax is a good thing, why are they yelling?" she asked quietly. Then another thought struck her, but decided to keep it til later.

"WE should have badges" Candice responded to Illyah's question, even though it was directed at Sasha. She then went to pull out her mirror, but found it missing.

"I'll have my mirror back now please". she said to Sasha.

Illyah knocked on the door, but it didnt sound very loud. It was similar to the door to Candices fathers office.

"Thump it with your fist" Candice said. 'its a bit louder than normal knocking."

Mirabell had shadowed the company to the Merchants guild. (She hadn't got out of her old habits yet)

Meera's reaction to the Golem was similar to Candice's, though she stifled her laugh - It wouldn't do for an assassin to show her emotions now, would it? Unsure of the situation, Mirabell stood back and let the others get on with it for now, but despite her efforts to be forgotten, she couldn't seem to shake the attention of the man -what was his name? Oh yes! - Nathan. He checked where she was periodically as the moved through the guild, and Mirabell was painfully aware of his wary stare.

Maybe the guy just doesn't like assassins? But I'm not even a real one yet! There has to be a reason..
Meera brought back her attention to what was happening. This next bit would be interesting...

Waiting for the door to be answered, Mirabell gave Nathan one of her best piercing yet inscruteable Looks.

As they stood in front of the door, Nathan checked where the Assassin was, call him paranoid, but when you've had not one, but two contracts taken out on you, and both of them failed you tend to get a little…cautious. Satisfied with where everyone was, Nathan shook his head.

"No badges, we are not some troop, the watch can have their badges we have the back of Vetinari."

For some reason at the mention of badges the vision of all of them wearing a great deal of tight uniforms and all moving in synchronisation came to him, shuddering he tried to rid himself of the thought.

"Okay, so they're not listening to us" he looked down at the golem again, Illyah didn't look pleased. Sighing Nathan turned to Sasha.

"Okay Sasha, do you not have skills in entering somewhere no one wants you to be? You don't happen to have any of your tools with you to open this door do you? So there isn't so much mess. I just explore all avenues before I feel compelled to ask Spinner to help us."

"As it happens then yes, I just so happen to have my kit with me. I never go anywhere without my kit and my kni.."

Just in time she rememberd Illyah's warning against carrying weapons and caught herself just in time, flashing a smile that was full of innocence and changed the subject

"You know, I'd quite like to have a badge."

She fished inside a pocket and pulled out a black velevet roll, inside were the small yet incredibly useful tools of her trade. She eyed the lock and selected some suitable picks form the roll. Kneeling down by the door she set to work, motioning the others to complete silence so she could hear what she was doing

It took only a couple of minutes until an audible click told her her efforts had been rewarded, she stood back up and began to put her lockpicks away

"Not much of a challenge really, now the locks at the Art Gallery are much more difficult..."

She grinned

"...or so I've heard"

reaching out she twisted the handle and the door opened. The voices inside had been silent since the scrabbling sound of Sasha at work on the lock had been heard by the occupants but noew a grunt of outrage could be heard as the heavy door swung open and Sasha stood in the now open doorway with her arms folded

"Hello gentlemen, it's your lucky day. You've been chosen as the first clients of the newly reformed Department of Taxation"

Illyah was impressed; he was thinking that Lord Vetinari had chosen wisely when selecting the team.

And you wanted hammers...gees.

Looking around the room as he walked in, Illyah noticed that although large and obviously the office of a guild master - it wasn't nearly as nice as theirs.

They spend their money on their own homes and such, not where they work...

"Yes. Uh, yes, indeed Mr Parker, you have been chosen as our first collection. Let me introduce myself, I am Mr Kuryakin - you can call me Illyah. I am the new tax coordinator for the city."

He stood in front of the desk and introduced everyone to the master; the guild members in the office couldn't decide whether to stay or melt into the woodwork.

"Sasha has the figures I believe, for your account. I dare say you have been most negligent in your duty as a citizen of our fine city. 's shame really, you should be setting an example for the rest of us."

A box of cigars was open on the desk and even though he didn't smoke-

Grab one will ya? I might like a smoke after dinner.

Illyah did so, and putting it into his coat pocket, saw the color rise over the collar of Mr Parker like a thermometer in the sun. He quickly laid out his best case for cooperation from the guild.

"We are here under the authority of Lord Vetinari. He will be expecting your full cooperation. I would be happy to tell him that you were most helpful. Do you have children Mr Parker? I like children, never had any myself, but they are just little angels aren't they?"

You never had any children because you could never get-

"And puppies. I like puppies too. Shame they have to grow up to be big old smelly dogs."

Illyah found a chair currently unoccupied by a guild member and sat down, taking up a copy of the city newspaper.

"So, Mr Parker. I hope we can come to an agreement this morning, we have so many other calls to make. You...uh, can say something Mr Parker - we'll make better progress that way."

The door...

Opening the paper to the next page, Illyah relaxed in the chair and then straightened up quickly. "Oh! Almost forgot! We'll deduct the cost of a new front door...er...wall, maybe, from your balance. Least we can do."

Returning to the paper, he settled down again to read.

Most of the members in the room had gone very pale, but the one sitting opposite Illyah appeared to be chewing something invisible and his face was going through a very interesting colour combination. The situation was obviously very delicate.

"Actually" Nathan began deciding to live dangerously "We are not required to pay for the door as you refused us entry."

"YOU BREAK INTO GUILD PROPERTY AND HAVE THE AUDACITY TO ASK FOR MONEY!"

Nathan was very proud that he did not wince at the overpowering assault on his ears. He merely closed his eyes until the ringing stopped. Flicking through the book he looked at it for a moment before responding.

"You have a hefty account with the city, we showed your doorman our accreditation from the Patrician's pen, the ink isn't even dry on it. The bottom line is whoever you are, we are collecting money you owe us, we can breakdown whatever we want and it's perfectly legal."

He threw the book on the desk, it spun and landed facing the man behind the desk, open and ready to read. Nathan felt his temper flaring, his job required patience, but he didn't even wish to be here and he was certainly not going to be shouted at by some guy behind a big desk who think they should be contrite and apologetic.

"I can't even remember your name is how little I care who you are. That book and the letter my boss is carrying says that we can strip this entire place of anything of value until it adds up to the amount that you owe us, if you don't want that to happen the I suggest you pay us. If you have not got the funds available at the moment a payment plan will be set up with you."

He decided with a flash of inspiration, the merchant stood and one or two of the members stepped forwards.

"You know something else, if you hit me you'll not see daylight for so long when you do get out you'll wonder what the strange glowing fire in the sky is."

He didn't know whether it was true or not, but his fire was up, he was good at confrontation, he usually managed to stare the other guy down. He stood there waiting for the fat cat to reply.

Sasha stood by the door and listened with interest

We can do all that? Cool! I really need to have a read of that book

The atmosphere in the office changed with Nathans mood. As Nathan stood firm the face of the merchant went through several shades of pink, then red darkening to crimson with splotches of purple. His jaw worked as though he was trying to speak but was choking on his own rage. Sasha couldn't help but smile, she leant against the doorframe with her arms folded

"You know gentlemen, if you really don't believe that we can do everything that my colleague has just told you we can do then I can always run up to the palace and get his lordship. I'm sure he can explain the situation to you again, although I can't imagine he'd be too happy about having to do so"

The merchant glared at her and sat down heavily in his chair. His cohorts backed down but added their own glares at Nathan and Illyah. Finally the merchant grunted somthing unintelligble. Sasha theatrically cupped her hands around her ear

"Say it again so everyone can hear you"

The merchants expresison turned to pure poison, he pointedly looked only at Illyah perhaps hoping that if he ignored the annoying young woman she might shut up and go away. He spoke in a low even voice, but was obviously still furious

"It won't be nessecary to bother his lordship. Show me your accreditation and if it all seems in order we may proceed to discussions of payment"

Sasha stepped forward and put the paper with the figures on the desk, the merchants gaze fell to the figures and he spluttered

"This is daylight robbery!"

Sasha grinned, perhaps this tax collection business could be fun after all

Illyah listened to the exchange between Nathan, Sasha and Mr Parker, but continued to read the newspaper with interest. He heard the reference to robbery though and decided to speak up.

"No Mr Parker, robbery is done by theives, usually armed and with threats of great bodily harm if the victim refuses to comply with certain demands. We however, are from the government...it's different."

As he stood up from the chair Illyah saw a cartoon by Mr Fizz on the last page of the paper. It depicted an old woman, hunched over her handbag, while in the background several shadowy figures each put out a hand as if to grab her purse. The caption read: Tax Time My Deary!

Somebody has their ear to the ground don't they?

"I never understood that saying. Sasha, look - I think this is meant to be us."

Handing the paper to her, Illyah took a step closer to the desk and could just make out the figures on the paper in front of Parker. He cringed inwardly - this was no small figure. But still, a debt was a debt and this one was long overdue.

"Nathan, I'm sure Mr Parker will see reason soon enough. I expect the sudden shock was a bit much." Giving him only the most subtle of winks, Illyah continued. "You do have your little friend secured? I'd hate for him to get loose in here."

"Candice? I think we'll be getting paid today. I don't believe Mr Parker would be keeping such sums of money in his office; could you please accompany his associate to the vault? I only assume there is a vault on the property because I don't think anyone would want us to start poking around their bank accounts. Would they?"

The Merchants were beaten, Nathan knew they were beaten by the look in Mr Parker's eyes. The rest of the man's face however spoke of belligerence and Nathan couldn't help hoping the man would just try something. When Illyah spoke of the golem and winked Nathan replied with his gaze still on the merchants.

"Well, I'm not sure if he enjoys being laughed at, you always know that the small guy is the one to watch in a fight."

Mr Parker waved to an associate and stood, a clear white flag. The room seemed to relax, they were reluctant, of course they were, what Ankh-Morpork citizen enjoys being parted from his or her money? Still it had been relatively easy, relative that was to pulling teeth from a trolls mouth of course.

"Well Mr Kuryakin it would appear that we must concede to you in this matter, my colleague will show your Miss Candice to our vaults. Have no fear however that I will be speaking with his Lordship directly about your conduct and this outrageous flaunt of government intrusion."

Nathan watched the man and as he spoke he couldn't help seeing the death throws of a struggling animal, trying to give one final kick before turning over and dying. Moving forwards he took the book from the desk and then began the task of blending in. They had got access to the vault and he was sure as heck going to be one of the ones that got a look in there, especially since he was pretty sure one of his clients wanted a specific item stored in there. He stepped back so at not to be so centre stage and waited patiently.

Candice had wandered over to the window, and looked down into into the street. There appeared to be a fair few iconographers and reporters in the street. Things were going to get interesting when they went to leave.

She realised that Illyah was speaking to her.

"No issue" she replied, eyeing off the associates. Mr Parker waved one of them forward, and she smiled. She then glanced at the bit of paper that had what the Merchants Guild owed, completely unshocked by the figure. "I'm going to need a hand carrying all this though."

The associate grunted, and they headed out of the office.

Illyah walked over to the window and looked out upon the city. He would have competely missed the crowd below if it hadn't been for sudden flurry of iconograph flashes.

"Oh my."

Well, you said Vetinari would know everything you did. You have to admit, your entrance was less than subtle...

"Mr Parker, my associate will require some help. I suggest one of your coahes be put at her disposal for the time being...maybe a couple of your best men as well?"

He didn't have to turn around to know the reaction; he could feel the heat rising once again from behind the desk. When Parker did speak, it was more of a croak.

"You - you - Never Tell Me What To Do! I-"

"I'm not telling you what to do Mr Parker, I have simply made a suggestion. I wouldn't want to have to tell anyone that you were, um, uncooperative?"

"Tell? Tell? Who are you going to tell? Vetinari will not care about anything you have to say about me! I am an important figure in this city and I will not be intimidated by the likes of you!"

As he turned back to the desk, Illyah took the opportunity to take another cigar from the open humidor.

"I'm not going to say a word to Vetinari. I won't have to. He can read about it in this the late edition."

Before you leaving the office, Illyah motioned for Parker to go to the window. "You might want to smile Mr Parker, they can make you famous."

As far as parting shots go, that was pretty weak.

"I'll work on it. Nathan, Sasha, let's go see how our Candice is coming along."

As Verurteilen walked on through the crowded street, an unusual pang of curiousity struck her, what was it, exactly, that happened when someone discovered her victims? Before she could finish this train of thought, she had already set out to investigate

A few moments later, she had found out. It had not been difficult to find where she had left the body of the late Isaiah Barter, as a small crowd had gathered around the body. A few watchmen were examining it

Hoping to go undetected, Verurteilen nonchalantly made her way across the street, and stopped in front of the jewelry store window, not far from the scene. Pretending to be admiring a black gem on an elegant silver chain, that was on display, she cast her eyes to the reflection of the two watchmen, standing over the body

"Poor bugger," one was saying, "it looks as though someone sent the assassin's guild on him"

at that moment, a younger watchman, probaly a corporal, dashed down the street, and came to a halt before his two superiors, and saluted

"What's the word, Lores?" said the other watchman, "and put your hand down, looks as though you can barely keep yourself up, as it is"

the corporal obeyed, and ceased his salute

"I just got word from the assassin's guild, sir," he said, breathlessly, "Lord Downey says there is no contract for this man, it was a murder, sir!"

"That is the second time this week!" shouted one of the two sergeants. The shop window suddenly reflected a toothy grin

third, Verurteilen proudly corrected him, in her mind, though it was not her own skill, she reminded herself, as they would have found Jacob Waverly's body, had it not been for the sudden luck of Talbot's igor. One of the sergeants sighed

"First, young corporal Sardent, and now this poor bugger," he said, "I tell you this, the man who did this is a clever one"

Yes, Verurteilen thought, yes, she is

and with that, the vampire leapt, unseen, of course, into the air, and disappeared, once again, along the rooftops

By the time Nathan had arrived, one of Mr Parker's associates was opening the vault with Candice standing behind him. All the hairs on Nathan's neck stood up and he felt his heart quicken, he knew that his client wanted something in there and now he was being let in. The vault was smaller than he had expected, but the shelves were groaning with the amassed wealth of the guild. Gold glittered, silver shone and diamonds twinkled teasingly, it was a real-life treasure trove. The small group walked in and immediately Nathan allowed his body to start stacking cash for the tax office leaving his mind free to examine the contents of the room and try to locate what he was really interested in. It was like a rivier of coins that poured int othe tax office sacks, it was just as well Illyah had had the forthright. As he lifted another box he felt something burn him and he dropped it. There was a crash and gold coins cascaded all over the place floor, blossoming outwards from him. The noise was not unpleasent, the sound of money but it was loud and when it finally stopped and the final coin had ceased its rolling the vault fell silent.

"Sorry, butter fingers."

Nathan said int othe awkward silence and watched the merchants that were helping them glare at him. He saw it then, the silver goblet, he cursed himself and looked at the others to see if they had noticed it as well. It was a stupid mistake and one he was angry at himself at, but he was pretty sure he'd gotten away with it and on the bright side he had spotted what he was looking for, and never one to miss an opportunity he had grabbed the small sheef of papers while people were looking elsewhere.

"I'll clear this up into the sacks."

Sasha had a quick chuckle over the cartoon, and gave Illyah a curious look. She was sure half his conversation was being carried out with someone not actually in the room...but ah well back to more important issues.

They were being given access to a vault full of loot, could today get any better?

She arrived at the vault not long after Nathan, stepped through the door and gasped softly at the vast collection of alluring shiny little treasures. Amongst the gold sat Gems small enough to fit into a pocket yet valuable enough to line her pockets for a year at least. She stood for a moment doing a mental list of what she could ...

No, better just take what I'm supposed to, these guys looks pretty hacked off. Don't wanna give them anything incriminating to take back to Vetinari

She shook her head imperceptibly, surprised at her own sudden sense of integrity even if it was technically more of a sense of survival at not wanting to have to explain to the Patrician about illegal theft whilst on a job. She grabbed a sack, the gold felt deliciously cold as she grabbed handfuls of the cash, the coins tinkled and jingled against each other as they were dropped into the sacks. To Sasha's ears this was sweet music, the sudden crescendo from further across the room got her attention, as it did with everyone in the room.

In the silence that followed the crash of the crate of gold coins Nathan had stood in front of the slowly expanding pile of coins and muttered a excuse. After a few glares from the merchants everyone had gone back to what they were doing, but Sasha was a thief. She had been a thief for so long it was like a natural part of her and she recognised the signs and tells of someone who was up to something. Nathan was very good, he had waited until everyone was busy and his movements had been so slight they were almost impossible to notice. Sasha was quite impressed, his reflexes were really quite something.

Well, there's an interesting thing or two about my new colleague.

She went back to what she was doing, filling the sacks with the gold and cursing the fact she couldn't pocket any of it. Damn Vetinari, this was as bad as having a conscience although a conscience wouldn't berate you with quiet irony, befuddle you with impeccable logic then sentence you to the worst possible fate you could imagine.

Soon they had a nice pile of several sacks of coins. Enough money to clear the Guilds Tax debt and a very good start to the first days work of the citys new and improved Tax Office. Sash stood up after tying her final sack and looked at the bulging bags

"Okay, how we gonna get this lot outside?"

Illyah hadn't yet walked into the vault when he heard Sasha asking about moving the money. Deciding to turn around right there and get a coach - from the guild ofcourse - he spoke to one of the guild members and followed him outside.

No sooner had he reached the stables then there was a shout.

"'ere! He's over here!"

A running gaggle approached, flashes going off and notepads at the ready.

"What's going on here?"
"Who put that hole in the wall?"
"Are you from the government?"
"Is the guild in trouble?"

"Who are you?"

Ah, a question that was easy to answer.

Illyah spoke quietly to his new found guild associate and instructed him to bring the coach to an entrance suitable for his staff to use.

"My name is Illyah Kuryakin, formerly Sergeant Kuryakin of the City Watch."

"Has there been a crime? What can you tell us? People are saying you broke into the guild?"

Illyah tried to smile as he spoke, he didn't really do crowds well.

"No, no - there has been no robbery or other crime committed here. In fact, my associates and I are here on business. We are from the tax collectors office and we are in fact...er, collecting taxes."

There was kind of perplexed hush that briefly fell on the assembled crowd.

"But...but...you broke through the wall! You bashed your way in!"

"Um...well...ye-es, you could say that. I can see your point, really, but you have to understand that we are simply acting in the best interest of the city. We really are here to help."

"So," said a voice at the back of the crowd, "if you come knockin' and they don't open up their door - you're going to just break down their wall?"

Yeah, what are you going to do?

"I will, I mean we will do whatever it takes to accomplish our mission. We are working towards a better Ankh-Morpork after all."

Quickly turning away and almost jogging over to the waiting coach at the door, Illyah called downstairs.

"We're ready!"

Candice was supervising the counting of the money. She was surprised when Nathan dropped the crate of coins, as she hadnt picked him as the clumsy type, but then saw him staring at a silver goblet on the ground.

hmm, pretty she then dismissed it from her mind.

Finally, all the money was counted. Illyah had yelled down the stairs that things were ready up top, so she figured he'd organised a way to get the money back to the office.

"Lets go then" she said, and followed several of the merchants carrying the money out.

Nearing the coach, the reporters spotted her.

"Candice! Why are you participating in the robbery?"
"Is it true you work for the tax office now?"
"Who made the dress you're wearing? are you still dating William Downey?"
"Will you be breaking into everyones home?"

Candice was in her element now.

"Yes, i work for the tax office. Paying tax is something i feel strongly about, as i love this city, and its falling to ruin. WE all take so much from the city, isnt it time we gave something back? I'd love to see the streets safer at night, and the brass bridge looks like its about to collapse. We need your support to make sure Ankh Morpork continues to be the best city in the world."

another reporter went to ask a question.

"shush, let me answer the others. Tax officers are not theives. They're neccessary, like the Watch. how else would we ensure everyone paid their fair share? None of us should be exempt, because we all use the City. and it is a shame about the door, but it has to be known we are serious about this.

as for me and Will... well Will is a friend, and no more. My dress is from a boutique store on Short Street named Stitches, fantastic clothing in there. Now, if you'll excuse me, i have to get back to work."

She climbed into the coach.

Sasha hoisted one of the sacks and followed the procession of disgruntled merchants. It wasn't until she stepped outside to put her bag of cash on the coach that she noticed the rather large crowd, and even more disturbingly the iconograpers

Oh bugger!

She hefted the sack up onto her shoulder to obscure her face, there was no way she would willingly end up with her face in any newspaper. Tax Officer or not there were one or two people in the city whom she would prefer to stay out of the way of, a long way out of the way

Sasha saw her opportunity when the gaggle of reporters and curious citizens flocked around Candice, keeping the sack high enough to hide her face she sidled past but couldn't suppress a chuckle when hearing Candice states that 'Tax Officers are not thieves'

Well, most of them anyway

She busied herself at the coach helping to load up the bags, making sure not to attract too much attention to herself, but thankfully all the attention was on the rich girl who was lapping it up which suited Sasha right down to the ground. By the time Candice had finished answering questions Sasha was already inside the coach.

"So, not a bad job for our first haul. I think it's fair to say that this is going to be in the evening edition of the papers."

It was late in the day when Talbot awoke and slowly came to a realisation of where he was. His head felt as if it were full of cotton wool and very, very tender, while his mouth felt incredibly dry. Not surprising really considering he'd had one of his 'moments' the night before.

The sun was beginning to set as he rose from the chair and made his way over to the small kitchen where he poured a green-coloured cordial into a tall glass and drained it all in one go. That was better! Searching through the sparse cupboards, he couldn't find anything particularly appetising. He'd have to go out to a bar or restaurant instead. It was a while since he'd eaten out so it would be something of a treat.

The outer door banged shut as Talbot reached for his coat.

"Hello?" he called. There was no answer. Who on The Disc could that be? He wasn't expecting anyone until much later… Perhaps Igor hadn't locked it properly and the wind had blown it open and then closed again. He shook himself. Silly! For a moment there he thought someone had just barged in, but it was probably nothing.

Pulling his coat on as he walked, Talbot headed towards the door, just as it flew open and caught him on the head. He was aware of a sudden movement and flash of silver as he fell to the floor in a daze.

The Shades were a dark and dreadful place, filled with many dark and dreadful people, doing whatever they pleased to whoever they pleased, but to Verurteilen von Uberwald, it was home

She could hear every movement in the dark silence that shrouded this area of the city like a cloak, every shuffle of the feet, and every distant cry of someone in anguish, but to her, this was soothing music

It was only when someone grabbed her shoulder that the spell was broken, and a voice echoed in the otherwise unsettling silence

"Are you Verurteilen von Uberwald?" said the disembodied voice, holding the vampire girl, but the odds were soon turned around, and Verurteilen had suddenly seemed to have disappeared and materialised behind her stalker's back

"Zat depends on who vants to know," she whispered into the now suddenly frightened girl's ear, she quickly spun around so as to face Verurteilen, who smiled, "I see you for vhat you really are, you know, miss Mauria Barleysvay," said the vampire, her silvery eyes gleaming in the darkness, the werewolf girl, however, did not seem surprised at this bit of information

"I am here on business related matters, miss Verurteilen," she said, "and I am willing to pay you very well"

"I see," said Verurteilen, "and who is zis 'business' of vhich you speak, miss Barleysvay?" silently, the werewolf handed over an iconograph to the vampire girl, who suddenly burst out laughing

"Maurice Capenspire?" she said, "you vant me to take out an assassin?"

"What do you say, then, miss Verurteilen?" Mauria went on, offering out her hand, Verurteilen smiled, and shook it, closing the deal that has been offered to her

"It vill be undoubtedly be a good challenge, miss Barleysvay," she said, "I accept zis contract" and with a nod, Mauria shifted her form, and dashed away, further into the shades

when she was gone, Verurteilen took out a knife from her cloak, and turned it so that it flashed in what little light was allowed into the shades

"I believe zat zis is going to be very interesting," she had said, quite confidently

As Nathan emerged from the guild he watched Candice wave and get into the coach . By the look of it they had all been clustered around her, but now, it would appear, they weren't.

"Damn."

He muttered and started towards the coach as fast as he dared wit ha large sack of cash over his shoulder.

"Excuse me." A voice said before the world went white.

Purple flecks danced in front of Nathan's eyes and as they cleared he saw the man with the iconograph being swallowed up by the mass of people that were beginning to surround him, all of them asking questions simultaneously so that all he ended up hearing was a buzz of jumbled voices. The crowd around him felt like a physical weight, crushing him. Having photos taken of himself was not going to be great for business, his hand hurt and his progress to the coach had become painfully slow. There was not a lot he could do though, if he lost his temper and tried to barrel his way through the crowd it would gain him even more attention. Finally the small golem appeared with a tiny sack held in his hand. He moved through the crowd, if the crowd wasn't going to move that was it's problem. The small golem got to the coach and entered, leaving a pile of bruised and groaning people behind him. Realising his opportunity, Nathan raced forwards and jumped up, closing the door behind him. The carriage juddered and moved off.

"Well, I guess people don't like having money taken off of them….who knew?"

He drew the curtain back a crack and saw the crowd dispersing.

"So, what's our commission?"

He said flashing a quick smile.

Once they were all back at the Tax office, the gold was unloaded dumped into the vault, they would sort it out later, the Merchants guild was ticked off. Looking out of the smudged window Nathan noticed that it was already afternoon,

"Well that's one down and gods know how many more. It's afternoon already, if we carry on like this it's going to take us forever to go around just getting back pay."

He turned questioningly to the others to see if they might not have noticed the same thing.

"I agree. This could take time, but then again, I think once word gets out about us, the possibility of having to go around again will be greatly reduced."

Illyah had sat behind his desk to make an entry into a log and maybe send off a quick note to Vetinari.

"Let's do a few more of these and see how things go. Once we see what we're up against and what we need to do the job, I can get us some more help."

He quickly scribbled the word coahes on a scrap of paper.

"Right now, I can say two things for certain; first, Sasha was right, our little job this morning is going to be in the paper before dinner time; second, I'll bet anything that before we left, word was spreading through the other guilds. Right now they're either trying move money around the city, or running to Vetinari complaining about this injustice."

Don't forget...

"Ah, yes - good work this morning! I'm sure we are going to get along just fine."

Sasha had not spoken much since getting inside the coach, once they had arrived back at the office she had helped to shift the money into the vault then returned to the office. She walked over to her desk and sat down on the leather covered chair behind it. She put her feet on the desk, crossing her legs and leaning back with her arms folded.

"The boss has a point, once people learn that we will bust down the door to a Guild to get what we are owed I'm guessing it will get a little bit quicker to collect the back-pay. It's all about setting an example. Once the big players are forced to hand over the readies then the small fry should follow without a problem, and if they don't..." a broad grin "...that's where we come in"

Sasha looked at the afternoon light filtering through the window, she was feeling good. That sense of satisfaction that came with relieving people of large amounts of cash, it never failed to put her in a good mood. She looked at the board with the city map pinned on it

"So who's going to be our next target tomorrow then boss? Another Guild for sure, but which one?"

Leaning back further in her chair she put her hands behind her head and gave a small nod

"Not a bad result for our first day." She covered her stomach as it gurgled "Do we get a lunch break? I'm starving"

Candice had sat back down at her desk.

"There'll be people here tomorrow." she said, leaning back in her chair. "They'll want to pay their taxes."

Jeannie commented about lunch.

"Yeh lunch! Im starving. Letsgo get food."

"Tell you what - go take a lunch, enjoy yourselves. We'll meet back here later. I want to take a look at something here."

Illyah had a small nagging thought at the back of his mind ever since he had seen the bags of money being loaded into the coach.

If you think I'm hanging around while you count all that, you are sadly mistaken.

"I'm also thinking that we may need more staff eventually. If people do show up on their own to pay taxes, we'll need someone to man a desk...or two."

Looking over at the map of the city he saw that someone had put a red stick pin in the place for the Merchants Guild.

If those guys got away without paying for all this time, you know who would be the next likely bunch.

"The Thieves Guild. Right. That's it then - we'll try them next."

Mirabell had been trying to be as inconspicuous as possible. It had worked right up to the point where she started trying to transport the gold.

"'ere look! There's another one 'ere!"

Catching other people's attention felt so, so wrong!

"Careful Stan, looks like an assassin. You don't want any bother.."
The man looked worried for a minute, then checked himself saying
"Naaaah.. 'e's young, n' anyway, they don't kill anyone that they don't 'ave a contract on..." He turned to Meera "so mister," he grinned winningly " you an assassin or a tax collector?

Mirabell blushed furiously, and was immediately angry at herself for doing so. She opened her mouth to respond wittily with something along the lines of
'Well I don't know who you're talking to 'cos I don't see any men right here, but you're lucky I don't have a contract on you.'
Unfortunately the words got lost on the way to her mouth and she just whispered
"tax-collector" before scuttling off embarrassed to the coach.

Once back at the office Meera listened to the decision being made over where to go next.
Not the assassins guild! Not the assassins guild! NotTheAssassinsGuild NotTheAssassinsGuild!
Meera breathed a sigh of relief as the Thieves guild was chosen. She did not want to be the one to face lord downey, much less to take money away from him. She had the feeling that the man could easily find people to take out a contract on them if he so wished.

Mirabell's stomach rumbled, but she didn't have much money.. Don't worry, you'll eat lots tonight, no need to eat anything much now... That was the thing to tell herself, who knew? -She might even be right!
So Mirabell lagged behind a bit, and heard Illya speak again.
"Um.. Excuse me, but are you talking to me?" She asked him.

Sasha closed her eyes at the mention of the Thieves Guild and uttered a silent curse. She knew it would have to happen eventually but...

Only someone watching her closely would have noticed the forced brightness of her voice and expression

"The Thieves Guild? Okay, so we hit them tomorrow." She stood up, perhaps quicker than was nessecary "Well, time for lunch"

As she walked towards the door she imagined the scene, of her standing infront of Boggis and demanding he pay a huge amount of money in taxes. It would be...interesting

"Are you alright, Thur?"

Talbot steadied himself as he tried to get up. "Wha…..?"

"You were thlumped on the floor when I came in jutht now, Thur. And that'th a nathty cut on your hand. I'll jutht get my thurgical bag. Won't be a moment."

Before Talbot could reply, Igor had hurried out and rummaging sounds could be heard in the next room. Talbot lifted his hands in front of his face and saw his right hand had a deep gash on the palm which was bleeding profusely. His head felt delicate and, although he couldn't remember anything in particular, he was sure someone must have knocked him out with something. Before he had chance to think any more about it, Igor returned and immediately began stitching. Aaaargh! "Anaesthetic, Igor! Please!" he shouted.

"Thorry, Thur! I forgot. It'th jutht that I'm not uthed to patientth who are conthiouth."

Igor went over to the table and selected a syringe and phial from which he drew a suitable dose for Talbot. A few minutes later and Igor was able to resume his surgical exploits and repair the hand painlessly – and very neatly, as it turned out. Talbot wondered whether the Igors also had a sideline in embroidery and tapestry heirloom production…

"Thank you, Igor", he said. "I wonder who my assailant was and why they chose to come here and do… well, whatever it is they came to do." The two men slowly looked at each other and Talbot raised an eyebrow – something Igor could no longer achieve himself, at least not without installing bionics in his forehead - "I wonder…", he said. They both looked towards a small cupboard in the corner, the door of which had been prised open. It was easy to see from the doorway that it was empty.

"So much for Craggy's pouch with whatever it had in it." Talbot hoped that whoever it was had got what they wanted and that that would be the end of it. He headed back towards the door and was about to set out into the street when something shiny caught his eye. Bending down, he picked up a small crescent-shaped amulet and, with a puzzled look, put it in his pocket. Oh well. One item lost and another found.

"I'll just go and have a drink and maybe a bite… to eat, that is, Igor." The manservant merely nodded and turned to replace the syringe on the table. With his back turned to Talbot, Igor's look of concern went unnoticed.

The street was busy as the dentist stepped outside. He doubted whether anyone would have noticed anything unusual. After all, very little that happened in The Shades could ever be described as usual. Shrugging slightly, Talbot headed off towards one of the local taverns. Perhaps he should have that drink first.

Candice stood up, happy. She was starving!

As shewas about to leave she saw Sasha's slight panic at the mention of the thieves guild.

ah of course...

Sasha had made it clear to Candice that she WAS a thief. but the only time thieves ended up in the cells was if they were unlicenced. Tomorrow was going to be very interesting.

Candice was about to leave, then realised the assassin girl was still just standing there.

"You coming? My shout."

They have machines for that sort of thing. I'm not counting out all that money.

Illyah watched as the team filed out and caught himself as Meera spoke to him.

"Huh? No..I...uh, I was just thinking out loud there for a second."

Oh, go on, you can tell them...

"I'm fine."

With that, they left.

Illyah thought about Meera. She was so quiet that it was easy to forget that she was even in the room with you. That, and she dressed like an assassin...what was she thinking?

She is who she is.

"What do you mean by that?"

She is an assassin.

"No-o-o. She's too...I mean, she's not... You think?"

Next to Illyah, a cigar hung in the air, slowly smoking away.

After all these years, you still think like the child I met in The Shades.

Illyah got up from the desk and made his way back to the vault. He saw the bags of money on the floor and realized that yes, it would be too much to count by hand.

"Okay, show me this 'counting machine'."

Nathan watched Illyah, something had been bothering him about the guy. It seemed as though he were listening to someone who wasn't there before replying out loud. The htought of it engrossed him to such an extent that only the mention of the theieves guild was enough to jolt him from his revery. The Thieves and the Assassins were both annoyed at him at the moment, butt despite his concern for himself, he managed to note the force joviality of Sasha, not to metnio nthe slight dilation of her pupils, she was nervous. She was a thief why should she be nerovus? The answer came to him and seemed obvious after a moments thought, however he decided it would probably be unwise to talk about it, they all had their secrets. The mention of food reminded him of how hungry he was and the lunch break was a good idea. Unfortunatley, it was unlikely he was going ot get any food down him, there was too much he needed to do. He felt the papers nestled safely in his shirt, these needed to be conveyed somewhere safe before the merchants noticed that they were missing. Nathan doubted that htey would go to the watch, the contents of the papers were...sensitive.

Following the rest of them to the entrnace he said.

"Listen, I'll catch up with you guys back here in a little while, I've got some stuff I need to do."

He had realised that going to see the Dentist tonight would not be a good idea, well not unless he wanted to scare the guy wittless. He looked at his palm, it stil looked pink and tender but it would heal.

Nathan was always amazed how the shades alwyas managed to seem gloomy and dark even on the brightest of days. As he wandered his way through them, he felt like he was being thrust into deep night. It didn't take him long to find the surgery of the dentist, but when he got near he stopped and felt his enitre body shudder. Moving with a quickened pace he stood in front of the door, composing himself before knocking. It was as he raised his hand for the second knock that the door was opened and what he had sensed became stronger. Despite himself he flashed the six fingered fellow before him a quick smile.

"I'm sorry, I know I'm early, but I was meant to come and see Dr Talbot again this evening, I was wondering if he was available now."

"I'm afraid the mathter is out at the moment, would you like to come in and wait for him?"

Unwilling to seem to eager Nathan looked at the sky (as if you could see it in the shades) and nodded stepping inside.

"He thouldn't be long thir, can I get you thomething to eat or drink?"

The smell was so strong here it blotted out almost everything else and he trembled again. Taking control of hismelf he sawllowed.

"Coffee would be great."

He knew that the scent was strongest in the next room, but to move into there with Igor here and the guy coming back gods knew when? Nathan would have to sit and be patient.

Illyah found the machine in the corner of the vault under a cover of dust.

It looked simple enough; the coins got poured into the bucket at the top, fell through various openings depending on thier size and were directed to one of several tubes. The tubes in turn were equipped with small cloth bags that held one hundred or a thousand coins depending on the denomination. Once the bag was full, another was rotated into place.

Presumably, the bags were kept small in order to make it easier to track specific amounts.

The machine wasn't set up to count paper money as that was a more recent addition to the currency, so that would still have to be done by hand.

Unless whoever made this thing could make another.

"Yeah, that's an idea."

Deciding to give it a try, Illyah took one of the bags of coins and began pouring some into the beast. They all got stuck in the bucket and wouldn't move.

There's a handle on the side.

The handle began moving while Illyah poured even more coins into the top. Slowly but surely, the money began to fall into place and sorted itself out according to denomination.

"Makes an awful racket don't it?"

The telltale sling-sling of coins rolling through the machine was interrupted now again with a slight grinding noise. It didn't seem to affect the operation - probably just a cry for oil.

In no time at all, the coins from the bag were divided, counted and stacked neatly on the shelves of the vault.

"That was easy enough. An hour or so of that and our bags from the Merchant Guild can be sorted."

Interesting...

Closing the door to the vault, Illyah didn't catch the small glint from under the machine.

Sasha had headed out of the office quickly, for once she was frowning. But techincally the guild could't do anything to her now could they? Vetinaris letter had said he would take care of that. She took a deep breath, well she would just have to hope he had been telling the truth.

As she stepped out in the bustle of the city streets Sasha rememberd the allowance they had been given. Her grin came back, well a bit of shopping would help take her mind off the Thieves Guild...and she would be actually paying for it. The novelty of such an idea was fairly enticing and so she began to walk towards Market Street, there was a pretty good little tailors shop down there from what she could remember

She took her time, observing people out of habit for the opportunities that allowed her to ply her trade. When she arrived at the little shop she oushed open the door, a bell jangled and a middle-aged woman peeked out from the back room. A quick once over of Sasha earned a expression of bored interest, as if she thought it was obvious that there wan't going to be much money made from this customer. The woman walked our from behind the curtain and took her place behind the counter

"Can I help you?"

Sasha looked around the shop, through the half pulled curtain covering the back room she could see a half constructed suit on a tailors dummy. The shop itself was small yet clean and had a huge range of rolls of fabric stuffed into various shelves, a few items of clothing were on a rack in the middle of the shop and Sasha wanderd over to them

"Yes, I sure hope so. I'm looking for some clothes for my new job. I need somthing smart, y'know for meeting's and stuff"

The look on the womans face made it clear she found it hard to believe that this particular customer could be in any line of work that involved smart clothes, yet she managed an icey smile in Sasha's direction

"Well, I'm sure we can help you, although I'm not sure we would have anything in your price range, what may I ask is your line of work?"

Sasha had been browsing the various garments on the rack, but looked straight at the woman now

"Tax Collector"

The icey smile suddenly melted away as fast as the colour in the womans face.

"Tax collector? I-I see. Would you happen to be anything to do with the disturbance at the Merchants Guild earlier? My cousin Ernie works there and he told me that they blew the doors off then..."

Sasha flashed a grin and cut the woman off mid-sentence

"Yep, that was us. Only we didn't blow the doors off, our golem ripped them to pieces"

The womans eyes went wide and she looked around her tiny shop "I see, and this golem..he wouldn't happen to be anywhere near here would he?"

Sasha shrugged "Who knows, he's pretty hard to notice. Anyway, about my clothes..."

The woman nodded "Y-yes, of course. I'm sure we can find somthing that will suit, hahaha, you"

The nervous laugh from the shop keeper made it pretty obvious that one mention of the T-word and people immediatly thought you were going to cause trouble for them. Sasha bit back a grin and nodded

"That would be wonderful thankyou"

The woman, who introduced herself as Mrs Trimmer bustled off to grab various items...

...it had taken about half an hour for the right garments to be decided on but Sasha looked at her reflection in the full length mirror and had to blink to check it was really her. Mrs Trimmer had really done a good job, a well tailored white shirt coupled with a well cut black skirt that was short enough to be flattering to Sasha's slim figure yet long enough to not be considered trashy, the look was finished off with an extremely well fitted black jacket with an attractive V-cut. Sasha pulled her hair back into a ponytail and looked at her reflection thoughtfully

"Wow, now I really look like how I always pictured a tax collector. Perhaps I should get some glasses, you know, really finish off the serious clerk type look."

Mrs Trimmer nodded nervously, Sasha decided to push it a bit further and turned around to face the proprieter

"And on that subject...are you up to date with your taxes Mrs Trimmer?"

The woman paled, but recovered well "I-I dont handle that side of thing, my husband does all that, I..."

Sasha put up her hand "It's okay, I'm not about to demand to check your accounts...yet"

She turned back to the mirror and tried to turn enough to check out the back of the suit, apparently speaking to her reflection "I'm sure we can give you a few weeks to make sure it's all in order"

Mrs Trimmer swallowed hard "You know, that really does suit you, perhaps a small discount..." Sasha grinned and turned back to face the woman

"That's very kind of you. But I'm a government official, I can't take bribes"

A little while later Sasha left the shop, she would return that evening to collect her suit after Mrs Trimmer had finished it. Mrs Trimmer had also thrown in a nice pair of heeled black shoes to complete the ensemble at no extra charge, Sasha grinned to herself. Techincally she hadn't taken a bribe and she had been telling the truth that in a few weeks they probably would be looking at the tax status of the cities businesses. She double checked the reciepts she had been given and went to get herself some lunch, perhaps she would try All Johnsons, apparently he did a fantastic steak...

Entering the tavern, Talbot headed straight over to the bar and ordered a large beer. It wasn't his usual beverage but was most certainly what he needed at that moment. Halfway through the first glass he became aware that he was being watched. He turned towards a table in the corner just in time to see the figure sitting there huddle inside its cloak and hood. He had no idea who it was and wasn't minded to investigate. He'd had enough excitement for one evening and, besides, his stomach was beginning to feel extremely hungry. Draining the remainder of his beer, Talbot paid the barman and left, conscious that his exit was under scrutiny by the stealthy stranger.

Back in the street once more, Talbot could smell roasting meat and the draw was too strong to resist. He crossed to the opposite pavement and turned down the next alleyway where he entered All Johnsons. Many of the tables were taken and the diners were deep in conversation, one group laughing loudly at some humorous anecdote or other. Talbot selected a small quiet table for two to one side of the restaurant and picked up a menu.

It wasn't long before a waiter ambled over to him and took his order. That was simple enough and it shouldn't take long to prepare. Talbot had enjoyed his steaks 'sanglant' for as long as he could remember. As he waited, a beer was placed in front of him and he relaxed back in his chair to savour it. Then he felt it again – that same sense of being watched. This time, however, he couldn't tell who it may have been. There was no obvious candidate. Hmmmm. Maybe he was imagining it. He had a tendency to paranoia sometimes, he knew, but it had been such a strong feeling. Ah well, food was his priority right now.

Moments later, the bleeding steak was placed before him and, without hesitation, Talbot began to eat.

Verurteilen examined the iconograph as she stalked along the streets, toying it around in her gloved hands

she had never been assigned to an assassin before, and the thought of being caught and brought before lord Downey, or quite possibly, even Vetinari, both terified and thrilled her

she fantasised about stalking through the shadows of the assassin's guild, itself, knowing that making just the slightest mistake would result in her eminent demise, and she was hungry for the thrill of it all

suddenly, Verurteilen realised that danger was not the only thing that she was hungry for, it had been nearly a full day since she had last eaten, and the craving for the warm blood of the living was beginniong to set in

so she hurried down the crowded street, and stopped at the restaurant that was emmitting the strongest scent of blood, which, of course, turned out to be the one owned by All Johnsons, especially when his famous steaks were the daily special

walking in, she automatically chose to sit at the broken down table in the darkest corner of the restaurant, she sat alone until the waiter came over and asked for her order

"Just tip a day old steak over a cup and give me whatever comes out," she said, removing her hat

As Verurteilen sat in the dim corner, on a broken chair, sipping a cup of day old cow blood, she began to let her mind wander, and found herself contemplating what her life has become

Once a normal vampire girl, living comfortably in Uberwald, with her parents, and drinking fresh blood from whomever she pleased, now a vampire girl in her early twenties, wealthy enough to own acres of land, but choosing to live a life as a fugitive assassin, living in a cold and dark alley, out in the middle of the Shades, drinking cold blood in a low class restaurant

she was not entirley aware of how her life had turned into this, but now that she was living it, she would have to make due with what she had become

she looked down at her mug of blood, and sighed, sometimes she missed fresh blood

Sasha arrived at the door of the restaurant and was greeted by a mouth watering aroma of various foods. She pushed open the door and entered, the smells seems to intensify and her stomach rumbled again. Finding a nice quiet corner table Sasha began to peruse the menu, looking over the top of it every now and then to take a good look at the other clientele who were dining there. Her gaze fell upon the man she had seen yesterday at the cafe, he was happily tucking into a steak that looked as though it had only just been cut from the cow

ewww! Do you want steak with your blood?

Her eyes travelled over the room, and only took a few seconds to recognise the vampire that had been with the girl in the same cafe. She seemed to be nursing a glass of blood whilst deep in thought, Sasha shuddered at the sight of the congealing red liquid and went back to choosing her meal.

Whist waiting for her food she had begun to choose a couple of likely targets from the diners when her steak was placed in front of her, it was well peppered and cooked perfectly. Nicely seared on the outside and beautifully pink in the middle, she tucked into it with gusto. A short while later Sasha sat back in her seat, her appetite satiated. A glass of red wine had made the perfect accompaniment to the steak and she sipped the last of it as she looked around, contemplating her first day at work.

For an 'honest' days work it seemed pretty close to thievery, and that was just fine by her. But tomorrow was troubling her, she would have to face the Guild who had been pursuing her for months, and then ask them for a ton of cash...a slow smile spread on her lips. What could they do? Vetinari had exonerated her, and she was enitiled...no, expected to hit them for a huge tax settlement. Still, she took a deep breath. It was going to be an interesting day tomorrow...

The smell that seemed to permeate the surgery was beginning to get to Nathan and he knew he couldn't stay here a lot longer. Igor had given him water and the empty glass sat on the floor by his feet. Finally unable to wait Nathan moved into the next room and saw the splintered cabinet, he looked into the gaping hole in the door, he plucked a splinter form it and drew it to his eye, there was blood on it. Someone had been here and had snatched something and Nathan was willing to bet it was the same thing he was looking for.

Nathan tried to order his thoughts, he knew he was looking for but they'd be long gone by now and he doubt he'd be able to follow a trail of someone who was aware they were leaving one. His stomach decided his next move for him, he'd not eaten anything for what felt like a day and sitting here wasn't getting him anywhere, besides the thing was no longer here, mind you nor was the dentist. Looking around the floor he didn't see any signs of a struggle not that he could do a lot about it if there had been. Moving to the door Igor appeared.

"Can you tell Mr Talbot that I am sorry I missed him but that I waited as long as I was able."

With that said Nathan moved through the door and out into the perpetual gloom of the shades.

Johnson's, it had been the nearest place and it had smelt tantalisingly of meat and blood. It was not a noisy place, but still managed to convey the air of a busy place, there was low conversation and the scrap of cutlery. Nathan was so distracted that he did not realise he'd sat at an occupied table until the waiter came over to clear the occupants plate. Looking over he realised it was Sasha and flashing her a quick smile he spoke.

"Seems like once you're in the same profession you keep bumping into one another."

After a protracted pause in which Nathan did his best to try and forget what he had seen in the dentists office, he scrutinised his co-worker.

"Hey, nice clothes, very…appropriate."

He thought for a moment trying to come up with some topic of conversation.

"You know, what I've noticed about thieves is, they don't like it when you take back what they stole. I think I'm taking the golem to the Thieves guild."

Sasha finished her wine and was distracted from musing on tomorrows events whilst debating if the future should contain a slice of the gorgeous looking chocolate fudge cake she had just seen another diner begin tuck into. When Nathan had sat down at the table, she returned his smile with one of her own

"Admit it, I'm such charming company you just can't keep away" another thoughtful glance at the chocolate cake, maybe a small slice wouldn't hurt "I'm kidding by the way"

She shifted uncomfortably when he commented on her clothes "Well, the boss said we should get kitted out so I did. Think I'll go change after lunch though, I feel...conspicuous"

'Conspicuous' was not a good feeling for someone who used stealth and lived most of her life working on the wrong side of the law.

When Nathan said he would take the golem to the Thieves Guild tomorrow Sasha smiled again, yet there was just a hint of the forced joviality from earlier

"Yeah, that's one of the problems with Thieves. Another one is when they want to catch you, gut you and hang you from the Guild roof...*deep breath*... Good idea to take the Golem. You know, that chocolate cake really looks good"

She put up her hand to call over the waiter and looked at Nathan, her not very subtle change of subject nevertheless bringing her closer to achieving the goal of chocolate cake

"You want anything?"

Illyah decided to take a walk while the others were out to lunch.

Walking out into the sunshine, he squinted at first against the reflections from the store fronts before getting his bearings.

Making his way along the street, he noticed something peculiar; not one person would meet his gaze or acknowledge him as he passed by. He'd grown up here and knew almost everyone on sight, but today something was off.

He tried waving to C.M.O.T. Dibbler who simply turned his back and walked around a corner. He walked toward a few of the lads from the Watch and couldn't believe it when they walked away, suddenly intersted in ancient Morporkian architecture.

"What's going on?"

Looks like you've been turned out.

"Why? What did I do?"

Aha ha ha! What did you do? Gods you are a simple one aren't you? You're in the pocket of Vetinari now. You, my friend are One Of Them.

"One of who?"

Them. The oppressors. The Man. The enemy of all honest, hard-working folks all across the city. You are the Tax Collector.

"But I've known these people all my life! I baby-sat for them, I helped one or two of them build their homes for crying out loud!"

Yes, but in those days you weren't about to crash into their homes and take their money back to the city vaults, were you?

"I'm not a thief!"

No, you're worse now. You work for Vetinari. Hey, you still have that other cigar?

Illyah handed over the cigar and matches as he continued down the street.

The steak was truly excellent and Talbot licked his lips as he finished, noticing rather alarmingly that his tongue seemed to catch on his incisors. That hadn't happened before! He hoped it was his imagination but there was nothing he could do to check discreetly in the middle of the restaurant. He looked around to see if anyone had noticed anything and caught sight of the man who had visited the surgery the night before sitting with a woman he vaguely recognised at another table. They seemed to be engaged in conversation and not to be interested in him. Nevertheless, he still felt as though he were being watched and, trying not to be obvious, glanced around the room. It was then that he noticed the lady he had encountered rather alarmingly in The Shades. He saw the flash of beautiful teeth as she opened her mouth to sip her… drink? She didn't seem to be looking across at him and was sitting in a darkened corner of the room as if she intended to keep herself to herself.

Feeling slightly reassured, Talbot caught the waiter's eye and signalled for the bill. He would try to leave unnoticed if he could. The sooner he could get back to the surgery, the sooner he could check all was well in the incisor department. Just as long as everyone focused on what they were doing, he'd be fine.

Putting his hand in his pocket to find the money for his meal, Talbot's fingers brushed against the amulet he'd found earlier. He took it out to look at it.

Verurteilen was diving deep into her thoughts, and was not coming back up for air, she was flashing back to how her life had taken such a drastic twist

All she had ever wanted was to be free, but her parents thought that they had all ready had her own future set in stone, they had wanted her to go to snotty rich children schools, and follow in the steps of the nobles families like they had

She retaliated against their authority, and was eventually forced to run away to get away from it all, but she had soon realised just how tough it was to make it out on her own

She had returned home, and had begged her parents to take her back in, but they had completely shunned her away, and refused to even consider her their daughter, any longer

And so, Verurteilen was forced to suck the blood of innocent strangers, and even had to resort to killing them for their money, all just so that she might see the next day

The disgrace that she had caused herself had eventually driven her mad, and she was forced out of her home country of Uberwald, and came here, where a low life similar to hers was not uncommon, but it seems like that now that she has the solitude that she had always sought after as a child, the lonliness that followed that was the price, did not seem worth it

As Verurteilen scowled in her own dismay, she slammed some coins down on to the table, so as to pay for her mug of blood, and stood up to leave

These days, she thought, it seems like I cannot look anywhere without seeing someone who hates me

almost to prove her point, fate guided her eyes in the direction of the table where Sasha and Nathan were sitting, she sighed, and, bowing her head low, Verurteilen slipped silently out of the restaurant, nobody cared about the lonely little vampire girl

Nathan glanced at the board while the waiter stood waiting for his order.

"Just bring me a steak, pink on the inside and none of the scrawny ones, I want the edges to be hanging over the plate."

Nathan appeared to lapse into thought for a moment, his face going serious before a smile flashed and died on his face and he leant forward.

"Well hey, at least they've not strung you up yet, that's something to be thankful for right? Live for the day and anyway you're on Vetinari's payroll now, I don't think that the thieves guild could be that stupid."

His steak didn't take long to come, some effort had been made at presentation, but it was very hard to miss a steak that large. Nathan took up his cutlery and started his attack. He ate quickly but efficiently, slicing the meat and sending trickles of watery gravy oozing out of the steak.

The glint of something silvery caught his eye and he turned to see the Dentist sitting at a table alone looking at something he'd cupped in his palm. Turning back to Sasha he frowned and stood up.

"Wait one sec."

He said before moving over to the Dentists table.

"Mr Talbot, it's me again, I'm afraid that I came looking for you earlier than our arranged appointment this evening, but didn't find you there. I was wondering if you had decided on whether it would be possible for me to take back the small pouch that was left in your care?"

Talbot was shaken from his reverie by the sudden appearance at his table of the man he had noticed earlier. He started and almost dropped the charm as… what was his name again 'Peers'? – well, something like that – spoke, asking about the pouch again.

"Er… oh, yes, I remember. You came to see me about that last night didn't you. It had completely slipped my mind until earlier this evening. I'm afraid it's gone. Someone came into my surgery, knocked me out and stole it. I'm sorry. There's nothing I can do. I've no idea who it was or where they went with whatever it was." Talbot paused, waiting for 'Peers' to speak. His fingers played with the amulet under the table. It was somehow soothing. He couldn't explain why, but he felt compelled to keep it safe come what may. Odd that. It was almost as if it had a mind of its own, or rather that it was drawn to his mind in some way. He smiled vaguely.

Candice wandered out of the office without waiting to see if she got a response to the lunch offer - she figured if the girl wanted it, she'd follow. Actually taking a lunch break was a new and odd concept to Candice, lunch for her was normally an all day affair, but she realised most normal people couldnt do the kind of all day luncheons she was used to.

Candice found a place she'd been to before, and sat down outside, knowing that her meal here would be free. Candice hadnt had to pay for anything in a long time, which suited her fine. The chef here had a tendancy for swearing way too much, but his popularity, or notority, made him highly in demand by other resturants needing a boost. He was a celebrity in his own right now.

A meal was placed in front of Candice without her even having to order, along with a glass of wine thatwould perfectly compliment the meal. The food looked fantastic, and she realised how hungry she actually was.

While she ate, Candice watched the people in the street. People facinated her, they were so easy for her to read. She'd realised as a teenager how easy it was for her to get people to do things for her, give her things, and for her to talk her way out of most trouble. Pushing peoples buttons was easy for Candice - for her, they glowed neon.

The same people who Candice used to get what she wanted always assumed she was stupid. The blank stare, the dumb questions...it was easy to come to that conclusion about her intelligence. But Candice was far from it, it suited her to for peopel to think that. In her experience, you found out a lot more from a person if they thought you didnt know what they were talking about. Sure, there was a lot she didnt know, but she could pick up on a concept pretty fast, and anyway, it didnt matter what you knew, it was who you knew.

Sometimes they tried to use her. People and businesses would attach themselves to her, in an attempt to achieve the same level of fame and riches as she had, without ever stoppign to think that maybe she was using them too. It never even occured to them that if she could build their reputation up so high, she could also destroy it. Candice liked that power. You just dont bite the hand that feeds you...

So she sat there, eating her meal and sipping her wine, while people walked past telling their life stories to her without even realising.

Illyah managed to grab a sandwich and a bowl of soup at his favorite little shop before heading abck to the office. Along the way, he tried to ignore some of the stares people were giving him; even if he did try to make eye contact with them, they'd just turn away.

Back at his desk he sat and ate quietly, all the while thinking about how this afternoon would play out.

A knock at the door brought him home; a small man enetered and handed Illyah a small envelope. He then stood there as if waiting for a reply.

Mr Kuriyakin,
It does appear that you have taken on your new assignment with a certain amount of zeal unheard of until now. Start out big and make an even bigger 'bang' eh?
A word of caution however - do not expect all to be as easy as this morning. Certain members of the city may take serious offense to being brought to task by a team as colorful as yours.
I am sure you know what you are doing.
V.

"But I don't know what I'm doing," Illyah mumbled before remembering the man standing next to him.

"Thank you. I have nothing to send back just yet. I'll...see him later."

Gulping down the last of his soup, Illyah returned to the vault and started counting the next bag. The machine continued making that horrible racket, but appeared to be working just fine.

What did he mean by 'colorful'?

Sasha nodded gratefully at Nathans reassurances and was prety sure he was right, after all everyone knew that there wasn't alot going on in the city that Vetinari didn't know about. The Thieves Guild knew this so she was safe now right? A mischievious twinkle glittered in her eyes, perhaps tomorrow could be amusing after all.

She gave a nod when Nathan excused himself from the table and continued to attack the gooey rich dessert that the waiter had brought her. She watched Nathan approach the guy from the cafe earlier, the one who had been enjoying his barely dead steak. Sasha couldn't hear what was said but she caught a flash of something shiny under the table, intrigued she watched the mans hands and again caught a glint.

What is that?

No matter how much she tried she couldn't get a good look at it. These peaked her curiosity even more

Candice finished her meal, and realising there wasnt much she could get done before she had to go back to work - not even shop for a new outfit, as shopping was an all day affair for Candice - so she headed back to work. The main office was empty, but she could hear a loud noise coming from somewhere. She followed it, and found her boss tipping coins into a large machine. She recognised it, as her father had one in their basement too. But the one her father had wasnt anywhere near as loud.

"Its broken!" she yelled over the din. "I think there's something stuck in it!"

Illyah nearly jumped when Candice shouted to him.

"I would have thought the same thing," he shouted back, "but it seems to work!"

He stopped adding coins and let the beast finish counting what was already in the bucket. In about a minute the last few pieces of gold were bagged up in a pile on the floor.

"Remarkable thing, this. It sorts, counts and bags the coins in a fraction of the time it would take us."

Illyah asked Candice to help him put the bags of coins on the shelves.

"How was your lunch?"

Sasha had been staring at the mans hands trying to work out what the half concealed object was and was also, out of a habit that was so instilled in her it was almost instinct, trying to figure out how she could get hold of it. She had finished her dessert and now pushed back her chair and stood from the table. Drawing closer to the table she heard a snippet or two of the conversation and got the impression that perhaps the man was involved with some sort of business with Nathan. Sounded like something had been taken, she stopped briefly to speak to Nathan flashing a quick grin

"It wasn't me! Listen, I'm going to head on back to the office now. I'll see you there"

Her hand reached out for the door to leave when a gruff cough behind her made her stop. This was never a good sound, especially for someone with Sasha's colourful history. She turned slowly, her hand resting just over the pocket where she kept her trusty knife. To her relief it was simply the waiter, giving a pointed look from her to the bill for her meal that he held in his hand. Sasha laughed at herself, she was so used to hasty exits from restaurants that it had completely escaped her that she had to actually pay after her meal.

"Sorry, I swear I'd forget my own name if it wasn't written on my underwear"

Seeing the waiters solemn expression she shrugged "I'm kidding! Anyway..." Sasha rummaged in her pockets and pulled out enough cash to cover the meal "...here you go, keep the change"

Not surprisingly, since the change due was only a few pennies the waiters expression didn't change. His hand closed around the money and he stalked off back to do waiter-type things like harassing the kitchen staff and coughing subtly until his tip was added to the customers bill.

Sasha turned back and pushed open the door, it felt strange to actually pay for the meal. But it had been very good food and was worth putting up with the alien feeling of honesty that washed over her...and somehow she didn't think Vetinari would take kindly to one of his employees openly stealing...so she would just have to keep her thefts discreet, and besides, she had only taken a couple of dollars from the waiter.

A short while later Sasha arrived back at the office, her new clothes were safe in their bag and she felt better back in her own outfit. No-one was in the office but she could hear raised voices and a hell of a lot of noise coming from somewhere, following the noise she found the most interesting part of this place so far, the Vault. Illyah and Candice were surrounded by bags of money,

"Aww, not fair. You counted it all already?"

As he waited for a response, Nathan's companion came over to the table and, saying something about having to go and meeting up later, had turned to go.

Talbot was feeling unwell and was conscious of the changes in his teeth. He felt the need to leave urgently and beckoned to a waiter who came over immediately, before Nathan had time to continue the conversation.

Talbot handed the waiter a bundle of notes, much more than he needed, but h couldn't wait for the man to make out the bill. "This should more than cover it", he said. "Please excuse me", he said to Nathan. "I really have to go. I'm feeling ill."

He rose from the table so quickly, that he knocked his glass to the floor. The waiter bent to pick it up and Talbot made good his exit. Or was it escape? Why did it feel like an escape? He had no idea whether Nathan would follow him or simply return to his own table but Talbot was feeling worse than ever and was desperate for fresh air.

As soon as he was outside the restaurant, Talbot dashed into an alley. He had a sudden urge to put the amulet around his neck but no idea why. Was it really a living thing, imposing its will? He shuddered. It was then that the world changed, as if he was looking through a photographer's red-filtered lens and watching himself from above. His mind felt sharp and alert – not a common experience for Talbot. What was happening to him?

There was a hissing sound coming from behind some boxes in the alley and he was in time to see a small cat, arching its back, retreat into the shadows. Without warning, he sprang onto the roof of the nearest building and sat there, poised.

Thoughts rattled through Verurteilen's mind as she walked away from the restaurant, moving almost in a daze, she thought she was alone

she wasn't

If the smell of fur had not stung her nostrils, Verurteilen would not have noticed the heart beat of someone stalking her from not too far behind, she turned swiftly to see a matted furred, dark brown wolf sitting patiently on the ground before her, it's dark golden eyes stared directly into hers, as if it was expecting something of her

"Vhat is it, Mauria Barlesvay?" Verurteilen scowled, the wolf smiled, and shifted form into a young woman

"What is the hold up, miss Verurteilen?" said Mauria Barleysway, "you would have usually completed your contracts by this point"

"Give me time, Mauria," Verurteilen snarled, "it is not like I alvays get contracts on assassins, I must formulate a new plan if I vish to stalk ze guild undetected, I assure you, you vill be ze first to know vhen I have completed zis contract, save Mr Capenspire, of course"

"Just do not take too long with this," said Mauria, and with that, she was gone, padding her way back down the streets

Verurteilen growled at the sight of the retreating wolf, and then turned to continue on her way, and that was when she felt the heart beat of another person, though this one seemed to be high off of the ground, and it had felt quickened, as if some kind of rush had excited it

Verurteilen looked up, and could see a figure sitting upon a rooftop, but could not make out the face

Curiousity once again took its hold on Verurteilen, and she felt compelled to investigate this

Quietly, she had backed away into the shadows, and swiftly jumped up onto a rooftop not far away, but still close enough for her to get a better view

Ze dentist? Verurteilen said, in her mind, just vhat is he doing up zere? More importantly, just how did he get up zere? No human should have ze ability to jump zat high

Nathan nodded to Sasha as she left and, as it happened, paid for his meal as well. Talbot definitely seemed ill, his movements were jerky and it seemed that Nathan's presence was making him uncomfortable, or perhaps it was just being inside? The Dentist almost threw the notes at the waiter before disappearing outside. Nathan turned to leave and turned back to the waiter saying.

"The one that left already paid for both of us."

He went outside the dentist was nowhere to be seen but Nathan didn't need to see where the guy had gone. As he went to follow the clocks of the city struck the hour and Nathan knew that if he didn't get back to work he would be late and Veinari would want to know why. Cursing the poor timing he scanned about and looked up. Others eyes might not have seen it, but Nathan sure did, he put his fingers to his lips and blew a sharp whistle. Before calling out to Verurteilen.

"Oi, Come here, I need you."

His skin crawled, he recognised the figure from the square and had a distinct feeling she might just be something he wasn't going to like, but beggars couldn't be choosers. People around looked at him and then looked up, but they were all unable to see what Nathan could.

Verurteilen winced as the sound of the whistle struck the vampire's ears, and left them ringing. She looked down and caught sight of the man who was sitting next to Sasha, beckoning to her. Other people were looking in her direction, but Nathan seemed to be the only one who could see her

Vhat do I look like, a dog? she scowled

Quickly, but silently, she leapt from the roof, more like floating down quickly, rather than falling. She landed a few feet away from Nathan, and turned to him

"Vhat do you vant?" she said, coldly

Nathan took a moment to collect himself once she had landed and found himself wondering if this was truly a good idea, but was again reminded of his lack of options.

"I'll give you one hundred dollars to follow the man that came out of this restaurant before me. Follow him and I will meet up with you later and you tell me what he did and I'll give you the money. Normally I would be open to negotiation but I am running out of time, either yes or no."

Perhaps not the most polite way to address anyone, especially not a species as proud as a vampire, but he really didn't have the time for it. He waited for her reply

Verurteilen looked at Nathan as her mind replayed his request

He vants me to stalk ze dentist? she thought, sounding shocked

So? her mind answred back, what's the difference if it was you or him?

For one thing, she scowled, if I got caught, I vould be ze vone in trouble

But, you would get the one hundred dollars

I have got twenty times zat amount in my pockets, right now! Besides, I am an assassin, not a spy

It is either do this for him, or answer to Mauria Barlesway why you have not yet even thought about how you were going to take out the assassin

"...All right," she said, after a while, to Nathan, "it is a deal"

"Lunch was...short"

Candice looked at the sacks of money, then juumped when Sasha joined them.

"Hun, couunting money isnt as fun as peopel think it is. Its worse when its someone elses money, too."

She strecthed. "What time are we finishing today?"

Talbot felt another presence on the roof and could smell... vampire. He was just beginning to make out an unexpected shape on the roof when he heard footsteps and a sharp, ear-piercing whistle that made him wince with pain. Nathan appeared in the alleyway below and was looking up at him, giving instructions to come down. Talbot was about to comply – after all, he was feeling thirsty – when a shadow close by swooped down to the ground and transformed from an indistinct shape into a woman, standing with her back to him. So, the summons wasn't for him. Probably best not to stay around.

He turned and leapt across a few more rooftops, heading who knows where. The feeling of disorientation was unexpected and his thirst was increasing. A clomp of heels on the cobblestones below heralded the timely arrival of a passer-by. Anything would do at this point. He landed silently almost on top of the unwary stranger who had barely time to exclaim before Talbot's teeth had sunk with surprising precision into his bared neck. Moments later the man, drained of his lifeblood, slumped to the floor. Talbot looked at the still figure. It was not someone he recognised, but his victim seemed to have been clutching something in his hand that looked almost like the pouch he had lost. Curiosity getting the better of him, Talbot bent down to take a closer look and was about to pick it up when a faint sound from deep in the alleyway disturbed him and he decided it was time to leave.

Wiping traces of blood from his mouth, Talbot emerged into the main street and, recognising the buildings ahead of him, began to stroll nonchalantly in the direction of the River Ankh. He felt sated and alert. That had been just what he needed. He licked the inside of his mouth and found that his teeth had returned to their usual size. Perhaps now was the time to make his way home

Annoyed that he was forced to leave the pursuit to hired help, he banged open the door to the Tax office and moved over to the map.

"There's still plenty of daylight!"

He shouted into the vault where the sound of conversation came from.

"Let's go and shake a some thieves and see what falls out."

Something had happened to the dentist, someone had taken the pouch and their scent was strange. Most vexing of all, he knew that if someone had the pouch who saw it merely as something of value, they would sell it very quickly and it would be gone very quickly. The clock had started ticking again and instead of being what he should be, because of a couple of missing assassins and no proof, he was standing here 'giving back to the city'. He hit the desk with his fist, making an ink well jump and sending the crystal inside spinning to the ground where it shattered, sending shards tinkling everywhere and ink oozing slowly outwards in an uneven stain.

"Are we going?"

He said again, he was certainly not in the mood to take s**t from ANY of the guilds

After Nathan had left, Verurteilen turned to take out her orders, only to find that the dentist was no longer on the roof, she could feel his heartbeat, retreating quickly

She swiftly followed it, easily keeping on his track, until she found the body, it was stone cold, already, being drained off all of its blood, some of it staining the ground, Verurteilen idly nudged the corpse with her boot

Heh, she thought, this man is lying here, dead, and Talbot has just come this vay, unfortuneately, I think zat I know vhere zis is headed, but I am not surprised

It was then that she noticed the small pouch in the dead man's hand, leaning down, she carefully pried it from his clutch, and placed it in her cloak, Nathan might want to know about this

Continuing along the path, Verurteilen found herself stalking about twenty yards behind the dentist, she attempted to hide in the shadows as she persued him, reminding herself to be cautious, afterall, his senses might have hightened

The acrid smell of the Ankh was potent and threatened to overwhelm all his senses but Talbot sensed someone watching him. It had happened a lot that evening and he wondered why. Normally his life followed an unexciting and routine path but over the past few days it had become disjointed and strange. He wondered if this accounted for his sudden 'illnesses'. Was his metabolism becoming unstable?

As he walked, Talbot began to feel more and more like his usual self. Whatever had been ailing him seemed to be subsiding and the paranoia that had overtaken him earlier was diminishing. He shook his head as if to dislodge the remnants of the evening's events. That was better. Everything around him seemed normal – well, as normal as it ever did in the City and so close to The Shades. As if under autopilot, Talbot's steps turned towards his lodging and his face resumed its placid, daydreamy look. And as for someone watching him, he must have imagined it. The street was deserted apart from a few rats scurrying in and out of a nearby eaterie.

Inside his shirt, the amulet sighed contentedly and drifted off into its equivalent of a deep sleep. To all intents and purposes it seemed now no more than a simple necklet. Whatever had activated it was no longer in evidence.

A scuffle in a nearby alley heralded a Thieves' Guild encounter but Talbot was back in a world of his own and observed nothing

Sasha had been stood just inside the vault when Nathan yelled inside and she came out now wincing and banging her right ear with her hand.

"You know, me actually paying for my own lunch is a rare and remarkable event, let alone being gracious enough to foot the bill for someone elses and what thanks do I get? Being rendered half deaf"

Shaking her head to try and clear her ringing ear she walked into the office then stopped and watched the inkwell fall and shatter. Sasha crossed her arms, giving Nathan a raised eyebrow

"Dare I ask?"

When he asked if they were going to the Thieves Guild now Sasha was silent for a moment, her grin fading. After a few seconds she shrugged "Ah what the hell, might as well get it over with."

She wandered back towards the vault leant around the door frame and called over to Illyah "Hey boss? Are we going after them today or what?"

Mirabell started in surprise at the sound of Nathan's shout, and emerged from the shady corner of the room where she had been sitting watching the money fall through the machine.

"We're going to the Thieves guild now?" This was bad news in a way. It was only a matter of time before they started on the assassin's guild..

"So.. did we get the right amount there? What do we do if it's less?" Meera stretched and becoming more awake again added "actually, what do we do if the people we're collecting from don't have the money to pay us?"
An image of Mirabell's family being forced to part with all their hard-earned savings popped into her head, and Meera fell silent. As she did so, she appeared to melt back into the shadows again.

Tax-collectors are evil round where I live. What will my family think when they find out that I am one?

It was a funny old world indeed when government officials were considered evil while assassins were deemed perfectly acceptable