Vicki entered Rodi's and saw her brother drinking another shot glass of poison. "Todd," she whispered as she sat across from him.

"Don't start lecturing me Vicki, I need this to stop the pain."

"It won't help, it will only make things worse. It won't ease your pain, not really."

"What do you know of my pain?"

"Marty was like a daughter to me, I loved her, so yes Todd, I understand your pain and there's a part of me that wants to join you in drowning out the pain with alcohol, but that's not what Marty would want for me and I don't think that's what she would want for you either, do you?" Vicki asked.

"How did you find out about Marty?"

"Dorian called me, when she couldn't reach you. Blair's awake and she's asking to see you."

"I know that I should be there for Blair to help her recover, I should feel happy that she received another heart, but I just can't. I'm furious that Marty had to die for Blair to be given a second chance at life. Does that make me a selfish monster?"

"No, I know that you love Blair, but you also loved Marty. I know that your angry and scared, but don't use Marty's death as an excuse to push the ones that still love you away. Don't give into the anger, resentment and self hatred that you feel and undo all the progress that you've made over the years. I know that you hate yourself for what you did to Marty, but she forgave you, and I think that it's time that you find a way to forgive yourself."

"Never…I didn't deserve Marty's forgiveness and I will hate myself for the rest of my life. Twenty years ago I raped her and now I've killed her."

"Spencer killed her, not you."

"It was my finger on the trigger when the gun went off. I was trying to take it away from him. I wasn't paying attention to where the gun was aimed. I was to busy trying to be the hero to see where she was. My finger slipped and the gun went off and Marty was on the floor bleeding. I did that and I can't ever take it back just like I can't take back the night of the Spring Fling."

"It was a horrible accident Todd. Marty wouldn't want you blaming yourself for her death."

"Maybe, but she doesn't get a say in how I feel or how I act anymore. I begged her to stay, to fight to live, but she abandoned me, so I don't give a dam what Marty Saybrooke would want anymore," Todd said as he took one last drink and got up from the table.

"Where are you going?" Vicki asked.

"Back to the hospital to see Blair before Dorian sends anymore reinforcements," Todd said as he left.

XOXOXO

"You've always been my conscience, my heart, my soul…Don't leave me," Blair heard his familiar voice pleading with her as she succumbed to the tiredness that had settled upon her as she waited for Todd to arrive.

She was in Dorian's house, only it wasn't her aunt's house, it was hers…it was Marty's, left to her by her parents. She could see Marty sitting on the bed and Todd was there, but he looked the way that he used to look, when he was younger. They had just made love and he was getting ready to leave, only she didn't want him to go. He wasn't like the rest of her one night stands, she had fallen in love with him.

"Don't go…Will you stay?" Marty asked as her voice trembled.

Blair looked at Marty as she felt her anguish and fear of being alone. She wasn't just seeing her, she felt every emotion that she was feeling as clearly as if they were her own."

"Like the whole night?" Todd asked.

"Not the whole night, just a little longer," Marty pleaded as her eyes filled with tears.

"I can't, I'm busy. Get a hold of yourself, brush your hair or something," Todd said and then left."

Blair walked over to the nightstand and grabbed the brush, but when she looked in the mirror, she didn't see herself. She saw Marty's reflection staring back at her as she tried to brush through her curls. The anguish, fear and anger that she felt kept on building until she threw the brush into the mirror shattering it.

Blair opened her eyes and saw Todd sitting by her side, he was holding her hand and there were tears in his eyes. There was a part of her that was relieved to see him, but Marty's anger and rejection carried over from the nightmare.

"What is it Blair? What's wrong? Are you in pain?" Todd asked her.

"Why didn't you stay?"

"I know that I should have been here for you and I'm sorry. I just…I couldn't, but Vicki came and got me and I'm here now."

"Not with me, with Marty. She begged you to stay, she wanted you to stay and hold her. You just told her to brush her hair and you left her in that big house. Why didn't you stay?" Blair shouted.