As Kate walked to the elevator, Castle, Ryan , and Esposito were left standing at the murder board, completely unable to react. Where did that just come from? Did that actually happen?
On hearing Kate's "You coming.", Castle was in motion, still struggling to understand, but more than willing to find out what had gotten into her. As he entered the elevator, he turned slightly to glance back at his two friends, giving them, the famous Castle smile. As the elevator doors closed, he slowly turned to his partner, grinning with a sense of confidence and Castle cockiness. He tilted his head and began to lean into Kate.
"Back off, big guy", Kate snorted, pushing the palm of her hand into his chest, "and wipe that cocky grin off your face. Do not make me regret what just happened in there!"
With that retort, Castle immediately dropped the attitude and backed up. Okaay, again with the mixed messages. This woman was killing him!
"No, I wouldn't want that detective, seeing as I haven't a clue as to what just happened. Let me remind you… the boys and I were reviewing the results of our latest case, when you came out of the interrogation room, walked between the boys, grabbed me, and laid a kiss on me that I've dreamt about for four years. You then said "I love you, Rick" and you walked away. So, please feel free to explain what the hell just happened because I'm confused!"
Kate, who was busily inspecting the elevator floor during his tirade, looked up to see Castle angry and hurt, and it was her fault yet again. Yes she owed him an explanation, but the reality suddenly set in, and she couldn't think, couldn't breathe. Placing her hands on her face, she slowly brought her hands down, reaching out to touch Castle's arm.
"Yes I owe you some answers" she started, licking her lips "I-I meant what I said in there" God, she couldn't talk, her mind was reeling and the elevator walls were closing in. The air was stifling, she felt faint and she was trying desperately to regain her composure. Take a breath, come on Kate, just breathe, she murmured silently. She was trying to grasp that her friend Nick was dead, and that she had made the ultimate confession to the man in front of her. She was a wreck.
Kate was finally able to croak out, "Not here Castle, not here." It became apparent to Castle that Kate was struggling, and he realised that something had happened. As his eyes bored into hers, he could see pain and a lack of colour, which was reflected in her features He knew that when her green eyes changed to pale grey, his partner was in trouble. He abruptly forgot about himself and his need for answers, focusing on her. They needed to get out of the precinct, and out fast before something happened to embarrass her, she would hate that. As the elevator doors opened, he took her elbow, guiding her into the fresh air.
"Stay with me Kate, come on we're almost out." he whispered.
Kate couldn't, wouldn't fight him, and just like the night his voice guided her back to reality in the warehouse, things started coming back into focus.
"Ok", she mumbled, as they moved around the corner. Castle gently leaned her back against the side of the building.
Again, she slowly licked her lips, looking up at her rescuer. "Thanks, I don't know what happened in there, sorry."
"Nothing to be sorry about. Did you want to talk here or go someplace else?"
She took another deep breath, the words still wouldn't come. She pulled her phone out of her pocket, looked down at the text message, and handed the phone to Castle. Although somewhat confused by this gesture he shrugged, taking her phone from her trembling hand. He looked down, reading 'Nick died this morning at 4:26 am, he went peacefully.'
He totally understood now. Kate has again had someone she cared for, deeply, leave her. Not of his own free will, but he was gone none the less, out of her life. Before him stood this extraordinary woman, so used to being in control, yet currently reeling. He placed his hand on the back of her head and pulled her into him.
"It's Ok Kate, go ahead and let it out, he was your friend, you loved him."
As if this was the permission she was waiting for, the sobs started rising through her lungs and out of her mouth, racking her body, while tears flowing freely. She grabbed his arms, pulling him into her.
With her heels on, her face was buried in his shoulder. He held her closer and murmured quietly "Cry, it's Ok, I've got you, I'm not going anywhere."
After what seemed to be an eternity, her sobs finally lessened in intensity.
"I couldn't even respond back to Deb, what kind of friend am I? What can I say to her?"
tears spilling out of her now reddened eyes, as she backed away slightly and looked into his solid gaze.
Castle wiped the tears away with his fingertips so gently she didn't even feel his touch.
"Here let me." He took her phone, texting Deb; Rick and I are so sorry for your loss, say the word and we will be at your doorstep. My one question is Do you think Nick has talked God into opening a bottle of Amarone yet?
Rick showed her what he had typed. "What do you think? Should I send it?" he asked. Reading the message, a grateful smile appeared and looking into his eyes, she replied, "Absolutely."
With that the text was sent. What felt like mere seconds later, her phone chimed. Castle hit the read button, They're on their second bottle. See you around 9 tonight if that works for you.
Count on it they responded, smiling together.
Ok, so now what. They had so much to talk about, but Rick could see Kate was dead on her feet, her eyes at half-mast. She had been at the precinct for nearly 48 hours straight, surviving only on cat naps and coffee. She had made the three boys go home and sleep, not once but twice. Hmm, he thought, now is not the right time to bring up her earlier actions and open declaration. She never did well when she was tired, and he definitely didn't want to fight with her, not now.
"How about if we go back to the loft, fix something to eat, clean up and take a nap, so we can stay awake at Deb's house tonight?"
"Um, what about Alexis and Martha?" she asked.
"They're off spending my money shopping, and then plan to head out to the new Matthew Broderick musical. The place is ours."
While Kate was comfortable and at ease with Castle's family, tonight she was relieved for the quiet introspective time they would have. Though she wasn't sure if she had the strength for the conversation that was brewing. It was sure to be intense, emotional, she shuttered as she thought about it.
As she pulled the keys out of her pocket, Castle took them, saying "I'm driving; I have no intention of ending up as an accident report."
She gave him a raised eyebrow glare, but shrugged her shoulders, she knew she wouldn't have able to focus on the road. "Ok, do it."
"I have to make one stop on the way." Castle said as he glanced her way.
"Whatever", she said. She almost fell into the passenger seat, buckling her seatbelt. God, Castle was humming, he was so excited he got to drive. She never let him drive, so decided to let him enjoy his moment in the sun. As the car's engine started, she felt herself slipping into sleep. After all, she had been awake for almost 48 hours. She had no idea what time it was when she felt the car's engine turn off.
"Kate, we're here. You need to wake up, or do you want me to carry you, hmm?"
She opened her eyes, noting the mischievous smile on his face.
"Relax Castle, I can walk up." She was still a little groggy, but did notice he was carrying a large white box. "What's that?" she asked.
"Just wait, you'll find out", he replied, giving her a wink.
"Ok, fine. Keep your secret if you must. I'm hungry and gotta pee, let's go." She threw over her shoulder as she stomped off. He chuckled as he followed her into his building. She was still a little out of it, so he guided her to the elevator.
Once inside the loft, she kicked off her boots and made a beeline to the bathroom.
Her most pressing need taken care of, she splashed water on her face, washing off the smudged makeup, and hoping it would help her wake up.
Entering the kitchen and feeling better, she stated "Hey Castle, nothing like a power nap to bring me around. What's to eat?" She reached for the big box, getting her hand slapped for her effort.
"That's for later, leave it alone!"
"I'm hungry", she whined.
"I ordered from Eastern Pearl on the way home", he said looking at his watch, "it should be here shortly" and with that the doorbell rang, "See I'm psychic."
"No, you're lucky", she laughed.
While he was paying the delivery boy, Kate went into the kitchen to gather what they needed to eat the food. Once she had everything, she took the supplies into the living room. "Chinese picnic?" she asked.
"Sure, great idea. Did you remember the chopsticks?" he asked and he ducked as she tossed them at his head.
They mostly ate in silence, neither wanting to be the one to open the conversation door. Once they finished their meal and cleaned the kitchen, Castle suggested "Why don't you go clean up? You know where everything is, go on, ladies first."
"Hmm, you promise you'll be a gentleman?" she said raising an eyebrow.
"Naturally! Cross my heart!" moving his fingers over his heart, all the time smiling at his beautiful partner.
Castle realised he hadn't heard any noise. or running water for about fifteen minutes, and he entered his bedroom expecting to see a closed bathroom door. A low growl escaped his mouth, as he saw her, wrapped in a towel, with wet hair spreading across her face. A sleeping Kate Beckett, on his bed. My God, awake or asleep she was breathtaking. He wanted to sit with her, hold her, let her tell him what had changed and what was happening to in store for them. But he knew that would have to wait. She needed to sleep, and then they needed to comfort their friend. Their time would come. He had waited four years, he would wait for this woman forever. With that thought, he spread a blanket over her and headed for his shower.
He was sitting on the couch, working on his laptop, when he heard her exit the bedroom, "What time is it?" Kate asked sleepily.
"I was just coming in to wake you up. It's about 8:30, time to get ready."
As they were locking up the loft, he grabbed the box. "Ok, spill, Castle, what's in the box?" She again asked, now impatient for a response.
"My God, are you always a detective? Can't you handle a little surprise in your life?"
She turned around, pretending to be displeased with his secrecy, her finger poking his chest.
'Ok, Ok, violence is not required, jeez" he sighed, as he opened the box. She peered in, spying the wonderful desserts from the French Bakery Deb had introduced them to. A sincere smile of satisfaction slipped on her face, "Perfect," she replied, feeling somewhat guilty for her distrust.
On the ride over to Deb's house, Kate again allowed Castle to drive. When she handed him the keys as they were leaving the loft, he realised just how tired she was, there would be no pushing tonight.
"Oh, by the way, after we leave Deb's, we're stopping by your place and picking up some of your stuff. You're staying with us for a few days."
" I don't think so Writer Boy, I can take care of myself!" she returned through clenched teeth.
"I don't remember asking you, and it is not up for discussion. Your friend is dead, and you need people around you. Guess what, I'm people, I'm your people. Am I clear?" This time his voice had an edge to it.
She shifted her position. Facing him, she realised he was right. She did need him, tonight and always, and she couldn't run. Not anymore. She was in for the duration.
"Fine, whatever", she conceded as she slumped down in her seat.
"Good, glad that's settled. We're here."