"She better appreciate this….." I could not help but mutter to myself as I continue to guide my mount towards the address that my sister gave me. The summer heat was stifling this time of year. Storm clouds dance overhead, threatening all with heavy torrents of rain. Of course, this damn Templar armor does not help combat the humidity or heat. The stench of leather, sweat and steel fill my nostrils as does the scent of the horse I am currently riding. The animal neighs softly and shakes its head, sending droplets of sweat upon my armor. I grimace slightly, but force myself to ignore it. My own sweat slowly pools down my skin, forming uncomfortable trails of cold, wetness at the base of my spine. It is miracle that I even managed to get from the port to this middle-of-nowhere village without collapsing from the heat. Another deep sigh escapes my lips as I vainly try to stop the parade of complaints that continue to voice themselves in my thoughts.
As I cross through the village, I cannot help but notice there are no other living souls moving about. Perhaps the afternoon heat and the threat of a tempest are too much, or maybe the sight of my armor keeps them inside. With the growing tensions between the Circle of Magi and the Chantry it comes as no surprise that many locals find the sight of Templar armor to be unsettling…. Another sigh escapes my lips at the growing headache that is Templar and Mage relations. Thank you sis…..thank you so much for dropping this in my lap. The accusation is unfair, I know, but it does make me feel better.
It seems to take forever in this Maker-forsaken heat, but I finally find the shack my sister told me about. Okay… maybe it isn't a shack. But anything compared to the Amell estate is homely at best. It is a simple farmhouse, and though it is far from being beautiful it does have a certain rustic appeal and sense of durability. In fact, it almost reminds me of our house in Lothering. Oh, Lothering ….home….. When we were all together… when we were a real family and no one was dead or murdered or an outlaw…. The grief clenches at my heart at the mere thought of our past, but I quickly banish the memories before they can take hold completely and force myself to dismount my steed. I bring the animal to the side of the house where a small overhang and bucket of water sit; a place obviously meant for horses to rest. I quickly unsaddle the horse and rub his muscles down before making my way to the front door.
My heart thrums with nervous, excited energy as I bring my hand up to knock on the worn wooden door. Why did she want me to come so quickly? Is everything alright? What if she's ill? No…. she must be okay. She's the only family I have left….. Angrily and stubbornly I force myself to push back the thoughts that have been riding on the edge of my subconscious throughout my entire journey here. I knock on the door, perhaps a bit too loudly, and wait patiently for her to appear. I do not have to wait long, as a few seconds later she stands in front of me in a nondescript tunic and disheveled hair. Despite her unkempt appearance, there is a large, carefree smile on her face and her eyes shine brightly with vitality. I feel annoyance prickling the edge of my mind. Of course nothing is wrong with her. Since when does my perfect sister ever need help from anyone or done anything wrong? I try to force down the bitterness. After all, it has been a long time since I've last seen her and I did miss her…
"Carver! Fancy seeing you here." She says with a wide grin and laughing eyes, as she drags me by my arm into the house. I stumble in, more out of surprise than her actual strength.
"Hello sister." I manage to mumble as she drags me across the room into the dining area and sets me on the nearest chair. The table and the chair are both made out of the same worn, nondescript wood that the house also seems to be made of. In the center of the table a cheap vase sits, filled with various kinds of flowers. Their scent is faint and some of the petals have already started to wither and fall. The room itself is small, though the atmosphere is warm and cozy. Her smile grows wider as she sits next to me.
"I'm so glad you managed to come." She says, handing me a cup of water. It is cool, and I don't have to look inside the glass to know that she used an ice spell to keep the liquid cold. Greedily I gulp down the contents, not realizing until that moment just how parched I am. She is silent as she watches me, the silly grin never leaving her face. After a moment or so, the excitement is too much for her to handle. "There's so much I have to tell you about." The words tumble out in an excited rush. Eagerly, she grasps hold of my hand and drags me to my feet. With a loud, annoyed grunt I allow her to pull me upright and lead me into the next room.
"I've been doing well too, thanks for asking." I grumble much to her chuckling amusement. The empty cup is still in my hands as she pulls me into a small bedroom. The bed appears cozy with large, fur blankets and a large fireplace right next to it. On the other side of the wall is a small bookshelf filled to the brink with books. Dying sunlight fills the room giving every object a golden hue. But, what captures my attention is the wooden crib in the center of the room. Absently I feel myself walking towards it, with my sister close at my heels. The crib is simple, though obviously lovingly made if the decorations that adorn it are any indication. A baby boy with dark hair and large, luminous green eyes stares up at me. He coos and smiles gently at me, trying to reach up to grab me with his small hands. His features are delicate and soft. Even at a cursory glance I can see traits of an eleven heritage. Dumbly, I feel my gaze slip back to my sister. She is still watching me, her eyes shining with a mix of anxious expectation and excitement. Her hands tug at the edges of her tunic as she awaits my reply. My mind is blank with confusion. Why is there a baby here? Where did it come from? Why is she so excited about it?
"Well….?"
"….Why did you steal a baby?" She frowns at my question, amusement and exasperation shining in her orbs.
"Why in the Maker's name would I ever steal a baby?" She asks, hands resting on her hips as she looks up at me. Her bangs fall onto her eyes and with an impatient huff she quickly blows them back into place. I cross my hands over my chest defensively as I glare at her.
"I don't know. Why did you try to break into the Gallows wearing stolen Templar armor that was dyed pink?!" I retort with a snort. Of course, there are hundreds of stupid things that she's done over the years despite being the 'perfect one.' I never did have to think particularly hard when coming up with examples from her impulsive adventures, even when we were young. Her eyes widen and a sheepish grin slowly decorates her face. She holds up a finger while trying and failing to stop the slight blush of embarrassment from adorning her cheeks.
"…..One I was drunk…." She pauses a moment as if to remember the exact events before continuing once more. "….Very drunk…" She mumbles under her breath before holding up a second finger. "And two, Isabella dared me too!" I roll my eyes. Of course, how typical of her. And why am I not surprised that Isabella was somehow involved in that little mishap? A sigh escapes my lips as I rub my temple, already I can feel a headache coming on just from talking with her. "Anyways!" She says brightly, trying to bypass that particular memory or more likely any incident associated with Isabella. "I wanted you to come here so you can meet your nephew!" All the air escapes from my chest at that simple statement. My mind is blank trying to figure out the hidden meaning behind her words. How did….? When did…..? Who is the father? Mentally I kick myself for asking such an absurd question. The parentage of the child is as obvious as the sword at my side. Besides, she only ever did have eyes for that brooding elf.
A conflicting surge of anger and happiness rushes through me. I cannot help but feel a slight rush of protective anger at the thought of Fenris and her together. I knew that elf was no good. The next time I see him I'm going to…..
"Gahhooo" My eyes wander back towards the cooing infant, and I cannot help but be entranced by the innocent smile that he gives me.….. I'm an uncle… The thought frightens me and excites me at the same time. For several long seconds all I can do is stare stupidly at the baby until my sister, gently but firmly, leads me towards the bed and directs me to sit down. The mattress sinks down under the combined weight of my body and my armor. I can feel her gaze intently studying me, waiting for my reaction. A hopeful, impish smile makes her lips twitch slightly and even though her penetrating stare annoys me I cannot seem to bring myself out of this mental stupor.
"… how did this….how is it possible…. I don't understand…" The words tumble out of my mouth without me realizing it. Her slight smile turns into a full-blown grin and her eyes twinkle with humor and teasing. Mentally, I groan at the comment that is sure to come.
"Well, dear brother when two people love each other very much-"
"I know that!" I all, but, growl at her. Can't she ever take anything seriously? An exasperated sigh escapes my lips as I try to suppress my annoyance at her teasing remarks. "I mean when did you…well when did he….uh…. when was he born?"
"A little less than a year ago. I wanted you here then, but I was worried that the other Templars might have intercepted the message and I did not want them to find me in my vulnerable state. I'm so sorry Carver." She replies with an apologetic smile and a tight squeeze on my shoulder. I nod absently, still gazing at the crib where my …nephew… rests. A dark thought enters my mind, freezing my blood with fear and anger. Fenris has never made his hatred of mages and magic a secret. Where is he now? I haven't seen any sight of him living here and I don't remember my sister mentioning him in her letter…. Did he abandon my sister and her unborn child due to their magical ability? Pure, unadulterated hatred flows through me in addition to my fearful uncertainty. Both emotions quickly overcome the nervous excitement from moments earlier.
"Does he have any magical ability?" The words barely make it out through my numb lips. She blinks in surprise at my question and sudden shift in mood. Electricity and tension cackle through the air, and though it is probably only me, it feels as though the entire world is holding its breath. She cocks her head to the side as she considers the answer. Almost hesitantly she replies,
"It's still too-"The suspense is too much and she is taking too long to answer so I immediately cut her off with another question.
""Where is he?" The words rush out and I abruptly stand up, the anxiety making stand still unbearable. She quickly moves back in order to avoid being roughly brushed by my armor, but otherwise only stares at me as I begin to move about the small room. I swear, if he did abandon them I'll kill him myself. I start to pace, the loud thump of my metal boots ringing throughout the room. The infant does not seem startled by the loud noise, though in his short life he has probably become used to such oddities.
"Who?"
"The elf!" My shout echoes throughout the small room. The baby whimpers gently in surprise, but I'm too anxious to feel any guilt over startling him. Understanding floods her features and a small almost invisible smile slowly spreads across her face. She moves towards the still whimpering child, and quickly gathers him in her arms. Almost immediately, he stops whining and resumes his happy cooing once more. His large green eyes seem to sparkle as they fix themselves upon me. Once he is content, she turns her attention back to me.
"He's just out taking Togo for a walk. He should be back in time for supper."
"Oh…..I….well….I see…." Shame and guilt color my expression, and it is all I can do to meet her gaze. I shrug sheepishly in a nonverbal attempt to apologize, and thankfully she does not look too upset by my previous assumptions. Her small smile transforms into a full-blown affectionate grin as she walks closer towards me with her child still in her arms.
"Thank you Carver….." She whispers. A hand manages to detangle itself from the child and rests itself firmly on my shoulder. It is an action that father used to do as well; whenever he wanted to have a serious talk with me or if he was simply praising me for a job well done….. Sometimes it hurts just how alike the two of them are…. The memories are bittersweet and tempting; it takes more effort than normal to simply bury them within the depths of my subconscious. "Listen, I know we haven't always gotten along….. but, I am proud to have you as my brother….." By her expression I can tell that she is uncomfortable being so sentimental but forces herself to continue with her little speech. "Even though I'm kind of an outlaw…. Well I guess what I'm trying to say is that….maybe one day we can all be a family again…. and live together…. Or something like that…" She finishes with a bright flush across her cheeks. I can think of a hundred reasons why it would never happen, why it's nothing more than fanciful wishing….but I can't deny that the idea is more than a little tempting. A small, sheepish smile spreads across my face as I nod my assent.
"I'll like that…."
"Good! That means you can cook for us tonight." She says brightly with a wide grin. I feel my eyebrows twitch at her statement, but she either doesn't notice or care. She sets the baby back down into his crib and leads me back to the previous room. "Unless of course, you want me to cook…. Remember how well that turned out last time?" She calls as she strides into the kitchen.
"Alright, alright." I roll my eyes as I sit back down in my previous chair. My eyes are still drawn towards the bedroom, where I can hear my nephew cooing. Another cup of water is placed in front of me bringing my attention back towards my sister standing over me. I don't even remember her taking the cup to be refilled…nonetheless; I nod in thanks as I gratefully drain the contents.
"So tell me about what's been going on with you? Been keeping in contact with Merrill?" She asks with a teasing wink. I feel my face growing hot once more, but I force myself to ignore her teasing jabs. Instead I nod towards the room, directing her attention back to her son.
"I don't even know his name…" A new expression crosses over her face at my question. She smiles sadly at me before replying softly,
"I named him after father…." A thunderous silence descends upon the two of us. My eyes jolt to her's in surprise. It takes her a moment to meet my gaze, but when she does I notice that her eyes possess a sadden gleam that I'm sure shines through my own as well. I can't decide if I should be delighted or downhearted at the news. Instinctively I know that she understands my torn emotions. Words are not needed now…. Even after all these years, the pain remains for both of us. It binds us together, despite our differences in temperament and opinion. In the end I smile sadly and nod my head in approval. A rough knock and the sound of loud barking breaks through the taut silence.
"That should be Fenris. Go ahead and make yourself at home. We can catch up while making dinner. Your room is right through there." She says with a parting smile and casual wave of a hand before going off towards the door. I remain in my seat, watching blankly as she opens the door and embraces her elf lover. It would be nice to live here with them….. My only ties to my happy childhood…. I know it's all just a dream and with the way the Magi and the Templars are acting it would be a miracle if any of us live to a ripe old age. ….But…. Still….. It would be nice to pretend that we could live like a normal family again….. I miss bickering with my sister….and I could teach my nephew how to use a sword….. I could show him all kinds of things…. Perhaps we could live with our uncle and cousin….. maybe even Merrill…..A new life…. Away from the building tension of war. A small smile decorates my face at the fanciful thoughts and with a contented, wistful sigh I force myself back into reality. I place my cup on the table and get up to greet Fenris. He is still conversing with my sister, with Togo bouncing around their heels like a little puppy. I've never seen the two of them so happy, so content….. Despite all odds they're still here….still together…. Starting a new family…..
Yeah…. A life here would be nice…..
A/N This chapter came into being due to one of my reviewer's requests. (See, I do read them. Hah!) I hope I didn't disappoint. And I also really hope I got Carver's character right. Hawke's and her brother's rivalry relationship is not exactly easy to do. At one hand there's the standard jealousy/inferiority feelings and on the other side, Carver is very protective of his family. I hope I was able to hit the right balance in this fic, but I've never really attempted such a complex relationship, at least, not with an already established character. Regardless, I'm sorry for any spelling, grammatical errors or any OOC-ness. Oh, and Togo is the name of the Mabari. Everything else, (Hawke's name, her father's and son's names are all left up to the reader as is Carver's final decision.) Oh, and a special thanks to Krie for proofreading this piece. Gracias mi amor!