Brutus and I watched Caesar and his entourage leave.
"Will you go see the order of the course?" I asked.
"Not I."
"I pray you, do."
He shook his head. "I am not gamesome; I do lack some part of that quick spirit that is in Antony. Let me not hinder, Cassius, your desires. I'll leave you."
I caught his wrist as he turned to leave. "Brutus, don't go. This is the first time we've been alone together in ages."
Brutus nodded. "You're right. I didn't have anything to do anyway. Staying and talking with an old friend never hurts."

I tilted my head and looked him in the eye. "Brutus, I do observe you now of late. I have not from your eyes that gentleness and show of love that I was wont to have. You bear too stubborn and too strange a hand over your friend that loves you."
Brutus's gaze softened and he put a hand on my shoulder. "Cassius, be not deceived. If I have veiled my look, I turn the trouble of my countenance merely upon myself. Vexed I am of late with passions of some difference, conceptions only proper to myself, which give some soil, perhaps, to my behaviors. But let not therefore my good friends be grieved-among which number, Cassius, be you one-nor construe any further my neglect than that poor Brutus, with himself at war, forgets the shows of love to other men."

I was relieved. "Then, Brutus, I have much mistook your passion, by means whereof this breast of mine hath buried thoughts of great value, worthy cogitations. Tell me, good Brutus, can you see your face?"
His brow furrowed. "No, Cassius; for the eye sees not itself but by reflection, by some other things."
I nodded. "'Tis just; and it is very much lamented, Brutus, that you have no such mirrors as will turn your hidden worthiness into your eye, that you might see your shadow. I have heard where many of the best respect in Rome-except immortal Caesar-speaking of Brutus, and groaning underneath this age's yoke, have wished that noble Brutus had his eyes."

Brutus's hand fell off my shoulder, and he stepped back. "Into what dangers would you lead me, Cassius, that you would have me seek into myself for that which is not in me?"
"Therefore, good Brutus, be prepared to hear. And since you know you cannot see yourself so well as by reflection, I, your glass, will modestly discover to yourself that of yourself which yet you know not of. And be not jealous on me, gentle Brutus. Were I a common laugher, or did use to stale with ordinary oaths my love to every new protester; if you know that I do fawn on men, and hug them hard, and after scandal them; or if you know that I profess myself in banqueting to all the rout, then hold me dangerous."

Trumpets sounded in the distance, and I heard people shouting. Brutus heard it too. "What means this shouting? I do fear the people choose Caesar for their king."
I tried to conceal my excitement. "Ay, do you fear it? Then I must think you would not have it so."
"I would not, Cassius, yet I love him well. But wherefore do you hold me here so long? What is it that you would impart to me? If it be aught toward the general good, set honor in one eye, and death i' th' other, and I will look on both indifferently; for let the gods so speed me as I love the name of honor more than I fear death."
"I know that virtue to be in you, Brutus, as well as I do know your outward favor. Well, honor is the subject of my story. I cannot tell what you and other men think of this life; but for my single self, I had as lief not be as live to be in awe of such a thing as I myself." I proceeded to tell the story of how Caesar had challenged me to a race in the churning, violent river, but I'd ended up having to rescue him before either one of us could win. "And this man is now become a god, and Cassius is a wretched creature, and must bend his body if Caesar carelessly but nod on him. He had a fever when he was in Spain, and when the fit was on him I did mark how he did shake. 'Tis true, this god did shake! His coward lips did from their color fly, and that same eye whose bend doth awe the world did lose his luster. I did hear him groan-ay, and that tongue of his that bade the Romans mark him, and write his speeches in their books, alas, it cried 'Give me some drink, Titinius,' as a sick girl. Ye gods, it doth amaze me a man of such feeble temper should so get the start of the majestic world and bear the palm alone."

I paused to take a breath. More trumpets roared.
"Another general shout?" Brutus asked. "I do believe that these applauses are for some new honors heaped on Caesar."
"Why, man, he doth bestride the narrow world like a Colossus, and we petty men walk under his huge legs and peep about to find ourselves dishonorable graves. Men at some time are masters of their fates. The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars, but in ourselves, that we are underlings. 'Brutus' and 'Caesar': what should be in that 'Caesar'? Why should that name be sounded more than yours? Write them together, yours is as fair a name. Sound them, it doth become the mouth as well. Weigh them, it is as heavy. Conjure with 'em, 'Brutus' will start a spirit as soon as 'Caesar.' Now in the names of all gods at once, upon what meat doth this our Caesar feed that he has grown so great?" I clenched my fists. "Age, thou art shamed! Rome, thou hast lost the breed of noble bloods! When went there by an age, since the great flood, but it was famed with more than one man? When could they say, till now, that talked of Rome, that her wide walks encompassed but one man? Now it is Rome indeed, and room enough, when there is in it but only one man." I stared deep into Brutus's eyes. "O, you and I have heard our fathers say, there was a Brutus once that would have brooked th' eternal devil to keep his state in Rome as easily as a king."

Brutus stood there, frowning slightly, as he always did when he was thinking very hard about something. Finally he spoke. "That you do love me, I am nothing jealous. What you would work me to, I have some aim. How I have thought of this, and of these times, I shall recount hereafter. For this present, I would not, so with love I might entreat you, be any further moved. What you have said I will consider; what you have to say I will with patience hear, and find a time both meet to hear and answer such high things. Till then, my noble friend, chew on this: Brutus had rather be a villager than to repute himself a son of Rome under these hard conditions as this time is likely to lay upon us."
"I am glad that my weak words have struck but thus much show of fire from Brutus," I said, with absolute sincerity.