Penelope stood in front of the Hotchner's house and just stared. The front door was still taped with Crime Scene tape. She looked up at the Victorian suburban home. She had spent many afternoons and evenings there, baby sitting for Jack as well as just hanging out with Hayley. Looking after Jack had brought them closer than Penelope imagined they would, after all Hayley was her boss' wife, and for awhile there Hayley was very anti BAU. After their separation Penelope had remained neutral and Hayley appreciated that, and their friendship had truly started from there. She knew that Penelope did not judge her for the decisions she made to fight for her family, and that meant a lot to her. The more she got to know Penelope, the more she liked her and vice versa. Tears began to roll down from her cheeks. She was buying time and she knew it. As much as she needed to go inside, and wanted to do it alone, the weight of it all knocked the wind out of her. She wrapped her arms around herself, as she began to shake. She bit her lower lip and looked up at the house again forcing herself to pull it together and go on in. She didn't want to have to call Dave and tell him that she couldn't do it, she couldn't let Hotch down. Not now. Just as she was about to lose it familiar arms wrapped themselves around her, lost in her grief she didn't have the energy to fight him off. She merely turned into his chest and buried her face into his shirt as he held her as tight as he possibly could as she wept. Penelope was so upset that she was shaking, and beginning to gasp for air,
"Sweetheart, it's okay. It's okay." Derek murmured in her ear before burying his face on her shoulder into her curls. It was all so familiar. With one arm protectively around her waist the other held her face close to his chest while his fingers were caressing her hair. Every fibre of Penelope wanted beat his chest with her fist, yell at him to leave her alone, but she couldn't. With his hand resting beneath her curls, he dropped his lips on her forehead, trying to offer the comfort they both needed.
"I'm here P. I'm not going anywhere." He promised. Penelope raised her head from his chest to look up at him,
"But you've already left." She said sadly,
"I know, and I'm sorry, but I'm here now. Please P, let me be here for you. For this moment. Right now. Everything else we can battle later. I know right now you need me, so I'm here. Later, you can yell at me, slap me, hit me, whatever, but right now I'm here to help you do what you need to do. After all this, we're going to talk, and I know you don't really want to hear what I have to say after everything I've done, so I will beg until I'm blue in the face. For now, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for hurting you, and I'm sorry for walking out of your life. Please let me be here for you. Please let me hold your hand as you go up those stairs. Let me stand behind you as you pick out what she needs to wear. Let me give you a hug when you need it. Let me offer you all the comfort you need. Despite my actions of late, I'm still your best friend, and I am asking you to allow me to be that if only today." Her mind screamed no, but her heart longed for him. Her heart needed him. She needed him to be what he was in her life, even if only for that moment.