Wow, I was stunned by the amount of alerts and favorites notifications tonight, lol. I can't imagine what it would've been like if everyone had reviewed it as well….even if it's just a few words, it is always highly appreciated, so a big thank you to those who did review!

Kate thought it was some kind of sick, cruel joke when the sound of a heart monitor tore her out of the drugged slumber she was in.

For the second time in less than a year, the over brightness of the lights, the overwhelming smell of disinfectant and the dim sounds of voices and beeping machines welcomed her back into the land of the living. And, as the previous time, it wasn't a pleasant one.

She was faintly aware that she couldn't move; her limbs were as heavy as lead and felt foreign, as if they weren't attached to her anymore. The pounding in her head was enough for her to want to beg someone to knock her out again just so she wouldn't have to suffer through it; but what she finally reacted to was the long, stiff and painful breathing tube that felt like it had been forcefully shoved down her throat.

Even as part of her knew it was in her best interest to stay calm, the rest of her panicked and her throat instinctively closed up on the tube. Flashes of when she had nearly drowned in the Hudson sent her into near hyperventilation and she choked, her battered body suddenly coming to life as she thrashed, desperate for oxygen.

A cold pressure on her forehead dimly registered after a moment and, as Kate struggled through the medicated fog she was in, it took her another moment, this one longer, to comprehend that the pressure she was now feeling on her shoulders and thighs were restraining hands.

Kate whimpered as a bright light was being flashed in her eyes, the harshness of it bringing her to tears. Overwhelmed by the sudden overstimulation her body was being submitted to, panic increased tenfold as she felt different hands on her; the first ones had been cold but soft, soothing. The ones on her at that particular moment, however, felt odd and had a smell that made the detective nauseous; focusing on their feeling, Kate soon realized that the smell was latex, which meant that the hands currently pining her down and holding her face so it wouldn't move either belonged to doctors or nurses, or both.

Distorted voices were talking to her but she couldn't make out what they were saying, her brain too busy concentrating on her inability to breathe by herself. A sharp tugging in her throat took her by surprise and she choked again, and then she could finally breathe, her trachea free of the plastic and mechanically-induced air.

Kate could have cried in relief when the soothing hands were suddenly back, stroking her cheek, jaw, her bottom lip. With the freedom of breathing by herself came the pain but, instead of fighting it, Kate focused on the hands. The nice, comforting, friendly hands.

As her body relaxed, no doubt because of whatever drug one of the gloved torturers had spiked her IV with, Kate was finally able to focus on the remaining voice. At first she thought the painkillers must have been much stronger than she remembered them to be because she thought she knew that voice. She had spent four years either despising it or loving it and now that she was hearing it again, her heart twisted painfully in her chest, fearing it was an hallucination.

The hand that had been gently stroking her left thigh was suddenly back in her hair when she tried to talk, soothing away her frustration when nothing but a faint mewl escaped her lips.

Kate realized she must have been getting more irritated than she thought when the hand moved from her hair to her forehead, and felt a soft thumb softly soothing away the frown that had been contorting her pained features. "Shhh, don't talk. I know you're tired sweetie, but can you open your eyes for me? Just for a little bit?"

'Sweetie?' It wasn't before the voice had asked her to open her eyes that Kate realized that she had yet to open them. The voice seemed to have sensed her hesitation because a few seconds later Kate felt the light dim through her eyelids, the scorching red quickly changing into a dull yellowish light. "Come on, Kate, please. I know you can do it, just let me see your gorgeous eyes, okay?"

Castle. The voice was definitely Castle's, Kate discovered with a flutter of the heart. After a few failed attempts, she finally succeeded in open both of her eyes long enough to see a blurry face inches away from hers. She wouldn't have been able to tell with absolute certainty who it was if it wasn't for the piercing blue eyes that was watching her intensely. "Castle?"

Her voice wasn't any better than before, the writer's name that came out from her mouth barely above a broken whisper, but judging from the smile brightening Castle's face upon hearing it, she still did good.

The voice was still there when she woke up again. It was softer this time, and the rhythm with which it spoke confused her at first but as Kate listened, she recognized it. The words, the names…

Founding she had no desire to strain her inflamed throat, Kate settled for wiggling her left pinky. The movement was caught instantly and the voice stopped. "Kate?"

"Mmm."

"Hello, beautiful." This time Kate thought ahead and worked until her eyes opened, a little proud to have succeeded faster. Apparently she was not the only one to be proud because Castle was watching her with a warm smile when their eyes locked. Kate's closed briefly when she felt the writer's hand brushing her cheek, her body enjoying the man's touch more than she was willing to admit. "Hi." She croaked, wincing as she licked her parched lips.

She must have been trying to swallow too often for the man's liking because next thing she knew his hand was back but this time his fingers were cold and…wet? Kate opened her mouth obediently and sighed contentedly as a small piece of ice grazed her lips before finding residence on her tongue, the water forming as the ice melted instantly soothing her throat.

"Better?" Castle asked he had fed her a few more chips, taking one last piece and delicately ran it over her lips to help rehydrate them. Taking the woman's weak nod for a yes, Castle put the glass containing the ice chips back on the small night stand and sat back, watching her carefully.

Kate rolled the words a few times in her mouth before she felt strong enough to voice them, hoping her voice wouldn't be too broken still. "How bad?"

It wasn't as good as she'd hoped, but she had managed to voice two words out loud without choking on them, so it could still be qualified as progress in her book. In Castle's too, by the way his eyes sparkled. "You don't want to wait for the doctor?"

Kate shook her head, happy with not being probed and poked a little while longer. "Please."

"Okay, okay." Castle frowned as he looked at her, considering how to approach her condition. "They still don't know if you lost control of your bike, or if the car is at cause," he began.

"You landed mostly on your right side, which they told us is a good thing since the left one is still somewhat weak from surgery last time. You have three broken ribs and a broken wrist on your right side; you've dislocated your left hip, and your ankle is sprained as well. You had internal bleeding so they had…you had to go under surgery again."

"They've stopped the bleeding without having to take out any organs, which is good, and for the rest, it is the usual: bruises, bumps and chafes. Your leather jacket and your jeans protected you from most of the impact, so you didn't lose too much skin, but you still got road burn and scrapes, although they'll heal and you shouldn't scar from them. You also have a concussion…they said you were lucky not to have a fractured skull or worse, even with your helmet."

"I know it's a lot to take in, I'm sorry." Castle whispered when the blank face Kate had managed while he talked slowly crumbled, her eyes becoming shiny with unshed tears. "Do you need anything? Are you sure you don't want me to call a doctor?"

"Why are you…here…Castle?"

Castle blanched, not expecting that answer. "What do you mean?"

'Of course now he wants me to talk.' Kate thought as she winced. "I thought you…didn't want me…anymore."

Castle's face was unreadable. Or maybe it was and Kate was the one unable to read it. She must have been making a face because Castle had edged closer again and his hands hovered over her before finally settling on her arm. "What is it, Kate?"

Kate didn't want to talk anymore. Her last words had strained her vocal chords and now that the discussion she had been trying to have for weeks with the writer was on the verge of happening, she wanted out. She wasn't strong enough to have that kind of argument, not when she was barely awake in a hospital bed with her body broken and useless for escaping him.

Castle sighed when he was met with silence. They couldn't have this discussion here and now, not when the detective was literally trapped in her own body. Noticing that Kate was refusing to meet his eyes, the mystery writer had an idea. Her father aside, Castle knew he was the one who knew Katherine Beckett the best. And he knew that she knew it.

Gently in case she'd refuse to cooperate, Castle cupped her chin and put just enough pressure on it to show her what he wanted. Thankfully he met no resistance and soon her eyes were on his again.

Neither of them spoke, Kate's openly challenging him to figure her out. Air hitched in Kate's lungs when Castle leaned forward so that their faces were mere inches apart but she held his gaze as best she could.

Kate's interest peeked when something changed in the writer's eyes but didn't have time to think that his lips were on her forehead, and then on her cheek, his hand having never moved from her face. "Kate?"

She answered him with a tired blink, making him smile. "You're right, now is not a good time to talk about it. In a few days, when you're better and you can talk, we'll take the time, but not now. Not like this."

Castle hesitated a moment, unsure if he should share Alexis's revelation, until the dim fear that has constantly been present in the detective's eyes in the last weeks came back with a force in her eyes. He couldn't deal with that fear anymore, couldn't stand to see her that anxious all the time. "Kate?"

"I said we didn't talk about it and we won't, but I just have one thing to say, okay?" Fear flashed stronger in her eyes, but something else was there…hope? "I just…I'm sorry. I should've stayed around when you wanted to talk, I shouldn't have bailed like I did."

"Five times."

"Too often." He conceded with a frown. "But I'm here now, and I'm not leaving anymore. Kate?"

Fear receded in the cop's eyes, curiosity quickly replacing it. "You're not dying or anything anymore, right?"

Kate slowly shook her head, a small grin gracing her lips. The glint in her eyes might have been due to the drugs they kept her on, but Castle knew that little sparkle. It appeared in the detective's eyes whenever she was happy, and it had occurred on such seldom occasions that he knew each and every one of them.

"Good." Castle leaned forward again and softly pressed his lips against hers. "I love you, Kate."

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