The soles of my feet grazed the dewy grass as the wooden backyard swing rocked me gently. The sun was barely rising in the horizon and crickets still sang their chirp-songs. I took a drag of my cigarette, letting it sit heavily in my chest for a minute before releasing it.

As the dampness of the lawn sent a chill through me, I pulled my legs up to my chest and wrapped my free arm around them, the seat still swinging beneath me.

I hadn't slept at all last night. I couldn't stop thinking about my parents and Jeremy and Stefan and – although I hated to admit it – Damon. I couldn't stop thinking about how I'd rather be back at home, in my own bed. The bed at Ric's was nice and all, it just wasn't mine.

After tossing restlessly for many hours, around 1:00 PM, I finally threw on an old enjoi panda hoodie over my sleep tank and padded outside in cheer shorts and bare feet, making sure to pocket my pack of cigarettes and iPod.

Ric's backyard was beautiful – from what I could see in the dim moonlight. Just outside the doors was a marbled patio area including a seating area and fire pit. To the left was an underground swimming pool complete with diving board and a small waterfall pouring into it. Farther out in the yard was a wooden swing, positioned to look out at the expanse of hills. To the right, a line of trees marked the entrance to a forest, pitch black beneath the canopies.

I quickly chose the wooden swing, wanting to be farther away from the house than the patio, but not so far away that I couldn't run back to the doors should something in the night spook me.

My cigarette neared the filter and I took one more inhale before tossing it out into the yard to join the last four I had smoked. I made a mental note to come back tomorrow with a trash bag and pick them up, lest I anger Ric. I pulled out a new one from the pack, blocked the wind, and lit it. As I brought it to my lips and sucked, a dull ache throbbed in my chest. I really couldn't handle six cigarettes. I really couldn't handle one. But I didn't mind the ache as much as I should. Actually, I kind of reveled in the pain.

I rolled my eyes at the twisted thought. What the hell had I become?

I pulled out my iPod and unraveled the earbuds as the wind began blowing, causing an eerie whistling between the trees of the forest. Popping them in my ears, I scrolled the dial until I landed on the band Bon Iver. Turning to the song "Wash", I hit play, closed my eyes, and leaned my forehead down to the tops of my knees, allowing the song to seep into my veins and momentarily bring me an escape.

Was this going to be my life now? I was just going to… what had Damon called it? Moping? I was just going to mope around, finding no purpose to life anymore.

I kind of liked the sound of that. It seemed easier.

My mind pulled up the image of Damon stepping into the doorway last night as I had been crying. I had been too preoccupied at the time to really assess him, but now that I thought of him, I couldn't push his eyes from my mind. They were so interesting. You could just tell they held all kinds of secrets. Not only that, they were seductive. Even when I was angry with him, I could feel his eyes pulling me in, drowning me, claiming me.

I, also, kind of liked the sound of that.

Abruptly the swing bounced and rattled from the force of new weight. As my eyes flew open, I half yelped and shot up, yanking the earbuds from my ears. Spinning toward the swing, I nearly cried from relief.

"Shit, Stefan," I gasped. "You scared me."

His palms were held up slightly. "I'm sorry," he apologized. "I didn't mean to scare you. I said 'Hey' when I walked up. Didn't realize you were listening to music."

My hand rested on my chest as I tried calming my heartbeat. "No worries," I said between breaths, feeling slightly bad for snapping at him so quickly. "I just wasn't paying attention."

Stefan bent over and I watched as he picked something up from the ground. "I think you dropped this," he informed me, holding out my still lit cigarette.

My lips pressed into a tight line and I nodded once before taking it back. I took a few more deep breaths to fully calm my heart, then I sat back on the swing and folded my legs indian style while Stefan propelled the swing back slightly so we'd rock.

"So, what are you doing out here?" I asked, scanning the cigarette for any dirt before putting my lips on it again.

"I go running every morning at 6. I was in the kitchen getting a bottled water when I saw you out here."

"It's 6 already?" It hadn't felt like I'd been out here that long.

He nodded. "What are you doing out here?"

I shrugged. "I don't know. I just needed some fresh air."

He nodded again, this time more to himself as he looked out at the lawn. Several minutes passed before he spoke again. "So, hey, I wanted to apologize for last night."

"What about last night?" I asked, taking another drag from my cigarette and blowing the opposite way so smoke wouldn't surround him.

"I was talking to Jeremy after I left your room and he told me about you having a real problem with people saying 'Sorry for your loss.' I had no idea and I'm sorry."

I looked down at the ground. Jeremy had heard my rant on the sentiment multiple times. He out of anyone would know exactly how I felt about it.

"I just said it because, well, because I honestly had no idea what else to say," he told me openly. "I tried to think of what I would've wanted people to say to me if I'd lost my parents like that, but I'm not sure I'd be able to empathize even in my imagination. I never knew my parents. They gave Damon and I up when I was born and he was about a year old. So, because of that, I think I have a sort of… disconnect, I guess, when it comes to the relationship between a child and their parents. I can't say I understand what you and Jeremy may be going through because I just don't. And I'm sorry for not understanding…for not saying something better… I guess, I just…" He ran his hand over his face and into his hair and sighed. "I feel like this is coming out all wrong."

A pang of guilt shot through me as I watched Stefan struggle to redeem himself. I hadn't even considered the fact that he, too, had no parents. I shouldn't have automatically written him off because he said four small words to me. The truth was, if the situation was reversed, I'm not sure I'd know what to say to someone else going through this.

I reached out and pushed his shoulder gently, causing him to sway. "Hey, don't worry about it, Stefan. All's forgiven." He looked at me, doubtfulness in his eyes and I laughed. "I'm serious. I was just being cranky yesterday. I was overwhelmed with the trip and the move. It's a lot to take in."

I watched his shoulder drop a bit as he exhaled in what sounded like relief. "Okay. Good." He looked back down at the ground and I did the same.

I shifted a bit in my seat as an awkward silence settled over us, fiddling with the cigarette between my fingers. "So," I started slowly, my mind racing for something to talk about before we landed in the silence-so-quiet-no-one-wants-to-break-the-silence silence, "you and Damon have been here for about two years?"

He nodded, giving the ground another firm push to send us back. "Yeah, give or take."

"How old were you when you got here?"

"I was 16, Damon was 17."

"So, you're 18 now and Damon's 19?"

He nodded again.

Immediately my mind wandered to the dark haired boy upstairs in the round tower. 19. About a year and a half older than me, which meant he was wiser than me in some ways. With how he spoke to me I could only guess what ways those were. I'd never had a guy come on to me so blatantly. It was infuriating…and intriguing. I'd ever only been with one guy and that was my ex-boyfriend Matt when I was 15. The experience was awkward and uncomfortable… every single time. I'm sure Damon would be able to teach me all sort of new things…

I shook my head slightly at the thoughts, realizing where they were heading, and tried to focus back on Stefan. "You're both technically adults. Why are you guys still with Ric?"

"Well, I just graduated in May, so I'm still trying to figure out what my next move is. Damon's going to school at MFU and Ric offered to let him continue living here to cut down on costs."

He's in college. What's he study?

Each answer Stefan gave me about Damon, I found a new question popping up. A yearning began to form in my gut to learn more and more about the brazen brother. I glanced at Stefan and wondered how much information I could get out of him without being conspicuous.

I decided I would have to ask the questions in a round-about way to get my answers.

"Do you want to study what Damon studies?"

Stefan scoffed. "Photography? No way."

Photography. Makes sense. The darkroom, the camera. I should've guessed. "You don't like Damon's photography?"

"We really don't get to see much of his photography. He's real private that way. We only really get to see what he allows to be put into their art shows at the university."

"From the stuff you've seen, is he any good?"

Stefan stared down at the ground for a moment in thought before answering. "Yeah, I guess so. A lot of it was pretty deep. The kind of stuff you'd expect to see from an 'abandoned, brooding artist.' That's what the University Journal called him in an article."

My brow furrowed slightly. Damon didn't seem all that brooding to me. I mean, I'd only seen him twice – once in my room and the second in his – but he wasn't what I'd call 'brooding'. Pompous, maybe, but not brooding.

"So, if you don't get to see his work really, are you two not close?"

Stefan barked out a clipped laugh. "Definitely not close."

"Why not?"

Stefan turned and looked at me, making eye contact in full force. "Because Damon doesn't understand boundaries. He tends to destroy anything that's good and pure." His stare grew heavy on me and I sensed his words held more of a warning than one would first assume.

I quickly averted my gaze to my dying cigarette and acted as though it needed ashing.

The atmosphere grew uncomfortable for several beats before Stefan spoke up again. "Anyway, I guess I'm gonna' head out," he finally said, standing up from the swing. "Want to join me?" he smiled.

I shook my head and returned the smile. "Maybe another day."

"Well, if you ever want to keep up with me, you might want to give up those things," he nodded toward the cigarette.

I laughed. "Yeah, you're probably right. We'll see."

Before leaving, Stefan walked to the back of the swing and gave it one firm push to send me rocking again. I grinned back at him as a 'thank you' and he simply nodded.

I watched as he turned and started out in a slow jog toward the line of trees, eventually disappearing in the darkness.

Stefan was actually a really nice guy. I could see he and I becoming friends if I'd stop being an idiot and give him a chance. Back home, he'd be the exact kind of guy I'd love to hang out with. Maybe it would be good for me to get back to the basics, get back to what I was familiar with.

But something about the unknown interested me. The unknown, of course, being Damon. Stefan had said he'd been called 'abandoned', 'brooding'. What made people see that? Maybe I wasn't really paying attention when I met him. Now that I'd heard him described in those words, I felt a stronger compulsion to know him.

I was always a sucker for the walking wounded.

I picked back up the iPod and stuck the earbuds in their place. I closed my eyes and was met with his face again. I lingered on the mental image while turning up the volume, Stefan's warning ringing in my ears.

…

"Are you a coffee or juice kind of girl?" Ric asked as he rummaged through the kitchen cabinets.

"Juice," I responded, lightly pushing my eggs around on my plate in an effort to appear as thought I was eating.

"Jeremy?"

"Coffee," he answered around a mouthful of bacon.

"Aren't you a little young to already be drinking coffee?" Ric laughed as he sat my glass of orange juice in front of me.

Jeremy shook his head. "Dad started letting me drink it when I was 10. Never looked back."

"Well, okay then," Ric shrugged and went to get a coffee mug. "How'd you guys sleep last night?"

"Great," Jeremy responded first.

"Fine," I lied. I had come back in the house about an hour after Stefan had left. No one was up yet so I went upstairs and got dressed for the day in a pair of blue jean shorts, a plain grey shirt, and my converse. My straight hair hung loosely around my shoulders, but at least today it was brushed well. I applied a bit of foundation under my eyes to conceal the dark circles from lack of sleep and brushed my cheeks with light blush to try to make me look slightly less ghoulish.

Ric brought Jeremy his coffee and then sat across the table from me, grabbing a shaker full of pepper for his food. "I spoke to the moving company this morning. They said the rest of your stuff should get here by tomorrow."

"You know they're bringing like my bed and dresser and stuff," Jeremy said after washing down his food with an entirely too large gulp of hot coffee. "You can sell that furniture if you want. I like the stuff in this new room. Maybe that'll help pay the bills or something."

As Jeremy spoke about getting rid of his furniture, panic swelled inside of me and I dropped my fork. "I'm not selling my things," I snapped. The idea of getting rid of the furniture my parents had bought crushed me. Those things were mine. They belonged to my family. There was no way in hell I was letting someone sell them.

Both guys stared at me, shock registering slightly in their eyes.

"Um… Elena, I was only talking about my stuff," Jeremy started slowly, approaching with caution. "No one's making you get rid of yours."

I glared at him, his reasoning lost in my eyes. "You shouldn't want to get rid of your things either, Jeremy," I shot back harshly, pushing back from the table. "Why don't you just throw away our family pictures while you're at it," I nearly yelled at him. Before he had time to respond, I was sprinting toward the front door, a surprising amount of anger radiating within me and having me want nothing more than to get away.

As I threw it open, I ran into Damon who was balancing a box of what looked like chemicals in his arms. His eyes snapped up to mine in confusion.

Immediately I saw an out. "Still want to show me the town?" I asked quickly, glancing over my shoulder.

He looked past me to where Jeremy and Ric were approaching. "Uh, sure, I guess," he responded, shifting the box. "Let me get these inside."

"I'll meet you at your car," I said and started past him, not wanting to confront Jeremy and Ric about what just happened.

I wasn't entirely sure that the black muscle car at the end of the drive was his, but as I approached, I placed my hand on the hood and could still feel heat radiating from the engine. I assumed Damon had just come from it so I went ahead and hopped in the passenger seat, my knees bouncing rapidly as my over-built energy made me jittery.

Damon stepped out on the front porch and I watched as Ric called him back to the door. As they spoke, Ric glanced toward me with sympathetic eyes. Damon nodded in response to whatever he said then headed for the car.

As soon as the driver side door closed, I turned on him. "What did Ric say?"

He started the ignition and backed out the drive. "Basically that you're having an emotional breakdown and I should be prepared for sobbing. Little does he know that we've played through that episode, haven't we," he smirked and glanced over at me, reminding me of the closet fiasco.

I crossed my arms and snapped my head forward. I didn't find that incident or this one amusing at all. My frustration and rage still felt as though it was swirling across my skin. How could Jeremy be so stupid? How could he just let go of stuff just like that? It didn't make any sense to me. That stuff came from our family home. Those possessions were all we had left of Mom and Dad.

"What are you thinking?" Damon suddenly asked, pulling me from my internal rant.

"Nothing," I answered.

"Liar," he shot back just as quickly.

My eyes shot daggers at him. "What?"

"Elena," he chided, looking toward me again. "You honestly expect me to believe that you're sitting in that seat thinking 'nothing'?

"I expect you to know how to mind your own business," I replied under my breath, turning to look out the window.

He chuckled and the sound infuriated me more. This was a stupid idea.

After driving a while in silence, the car veered off down a narrow dirt road with trees on each side and my brow furrowed. "I thought you were showing me the town?"

"In time," he assured. "But I want to show you someplace else first."

It didn't take much longer before the road began to disappear between patches of overgrown grass and met with a thick wall of trees. We both climbed out of the car and I looked around, even more confused than before. "There's nothing here," I said aloud, stating the obvious.

"Follow me." He walked toward the line of trees and into the forest.

"Hey, I'm not really into hiking," I called after him. I was kind of clumsy when it came to non-flat ground and I wasn't really wearing the clothes for tromping through the woods. I could already feel the sting of thorns on my bare legs.

"Come on!" he shouted back and I bit down on my lower lip. I waited a few more seconds to see if he'd come back out and when he didn't, I realized it was either follow him or be left here in the middle of nowhere by myself.

Quickly, I started after him.

Damon was standing just within the trees and when he was sure I was following, he began walking.

"Where are we going again?"

"Jesus, Elena, why don't you just asked 'Are we there yet' until we're there."

I rolled my eyes at his rudeness. "Fine, then."

Was walked for some time before the trees finally faded away. In front of me was a tall hill and I inwardly groaned at the thought of climbing it. Before I could ask if we had to, Damon was already on his way up.

The anger I had felt toward Jeremy earlier was now directed entirely at Damon as I climbed the steep slope. My calves burned from the workout of traversing the forest and now my breathing was unnaturally heavy. Maybe Stefan was right and I should give up the cigarettes.

Finally, the ground began to level out and I looked up to find Damon standing a little ways away, balancing on a rusting rail of railroad tracks. The tracks were broken on each end, indicating it was no longer used.

Taking gasping breaths, I walked up beside him and let my eyes wander to where his were looking.

If I hadn't already had a difficult time breathing, the sight before me would have taken my breath away.

On the other side of the hill, a large lake with dark water was nestled comfortably between the hills. On one side of the lake the water met the grass and on the other it met a towering stone wall. Water trickled down the wall and stirred the nearly still lake. Colorful flowers and a few trees edged the water and the grass swayed in the breeze coming from the hilltops.

"Wow," I exhaled the word.

"Yeah," Damon answered simply and sat down on the rail he stood on.

I sat beside him and looked out at the scene. "How'd you find this place?"

"When I first moved here, I was out taking pictures. Came across it. I come here to think now."

I nodded, understanding how the serene atmosphere of this place could clear one's mind. I already felt much more calm.

We sat quietly for a while before Damon started to speak again. "So, seriously. What were you thinking about in the car?"

I glanced over at him, but he was still staring down at the lake. I waited a few beats, weighing whether to tell him the truth or not. I finally settled on the truth. "I was thinking about how angry I was with Jeremy."

"Why are you angry with him?"

"He wants to sell his furniture from my parents house. He likes the stuff in Ric's house better."

"And that's wrong because…?"

"Because our parents got us that stuff. It belongs in our family," I snapped.

He looked to me and I waited for a sign of judgment to reach his eyes, but it never did. "I guess I get that," he nodded and looked back out.

His response startled me and I looked down at the ground. "Yeah. It just upset me, I guess," I replied slowly. As I stared at the grass beneath my feet, I noticed the lace to my shoe was coming undone so I bent down to retie it.

Before I could even grab the loose lace, Damon shouted, "Elena, look!" and I sat up, afraid something was wrong.

Immediately the click of small square camera went off and my brow pulled together. "What the hell?"

He shrugged, laughed, and sat the camera next to him on the grass.

"Stop taking pictures of me," I demanded and punched him in the shoulder.

The act only brought another laugh out of him and made me angrier.

"Hey, you wanna' go swimming?"

My mind was whirling. I was going from angry to confused to calm to angry to confused all within one morning and I didn't understand how to handle it. "What?"

He pointed at the lake. "Swim-ming," he sounded out with a playful smirk. I punched him again. "Ow!" he laughed and rubbed his arm. "You stop doing that." He stood up and started walking down the hill, his body turned at an angle to keep his balance. "You coming?" he asked without looking back.

A blew a breath out my nose and shook my head at him. How could one person be so exasperating?

When we reached the bottom of the hill, I looked over at him. He was wearing dark jeans and a black v-neck shirt. "How do you propose swimming, Damon? We don't have any swimsuits."

"Take your clothes off," he responded and I tilted my head slightly, giving him the are-you-serious look. He held my gaze with eyes that answered he was entirely serious.

Sighing, I turned my back to him. At least I was wearing a tanktop under my t-shirt. I pulled the shirt over my head and dropped it to the ground. I kicked off my tennis shoes and reached for my shorts before stilling. Suddenly, this seemed like a horrible idea. I shook my head. "I changed my mind, Damon," I called over my shoulder and bent to reach my shirt.

Abruptly, strong arms wrapped around my waist and tossed me out into the lake.

Gasping, I shot back up from the water and looked at Damon. "Seriously?" I shouted, my hands held out to my sides. "You've got to be fucking kidding me!"

He stood at the waters edge, that maddening smirk on his lips. "You think about things entirely too much, Elena."

A grit my teeth together, too angry to laugh along with him. "There's boundaries, Damon," I snapped. "Oh, but I forgot, you don't understand boundaries."

"And what do you mean by that?" he asked.

"Stefan warned me about you, you know."

"Oh, yeah?" he smiled. "And what did he say?"

"That I needed to stay away from you."

"Why?"

"He said you destroy things that are good and pure."

I saw Damon's jaw muscles tense as he stared at me, the playfulness fading from his eyes. I suddenly felt as though maybe I shouldn't have said that and I wanted to take it all back. Damon broke eye contact long enough to hold onto the base of a tree and hop down into the water, still completely dressed.

Instantly, my heart began to race and my brow furrowed. Damon stalked toward me through the water and I instinctively backed away. I could feel the lake getting deeper behind me so I was forced to stop moving and let him approach.

He stopped nearly a foot away, staring down at me with blazing eyes. "Do you believe him?" he asked.

My mouth fell open slightly as I looked up at him. "I have no idea, Damon. I don't even know you! Or him for that matter!"

"What's your gut say?"

"What?"

"What do you believe, Elena?" he repeated again, stressing the words.

His stare was entirely too intense and I wanted to dive under the water to hide from it. I had no idea what had happened between him and his brother, but it was obvious that whatever it was still burned deep for both of them. I didn't want to get involved.

"I don't know what I believe," I finally responded. "I guess I think you could if you wanted to." I had no idea where the answer came from, but it felt honest. Damon seemed like the type of guy that could go either way.

He looked down, a flash of pain crossing his eyes. I instantly regretted the honesty. I needed to diffuse the situation and quickly. I was already too uncomfortable.

Not really knowing what else to do or what else to say, I swung my arm and splashed a fistful of water into his face.

His eyes returned to mine, a disbelieving look in them. When he didn't respond, I splashed him again and a small smirk turned the corners of his lips.

…

I don't know how long we stayed in the water, but I was sure that I felt more relaxed than I had in a long time when the hills eventually began to cast half a shadow across the lake. A peacefulness that had long evaded me was settling around me and I wasn't excited about leaving it there in the water, but the air was growing cold and we knew it would be dark soon.

Damon climbed out first, shaking his head like a dog to expel water from the dark strands of hair. I watched as he grabbed the hem of his shirt and pulled it gracefully over his head. He walked over to where the sun still shone and hung the shirt on the branch of a tree. He stretched his arms over his held and I found myself captivated by the movement.

His body was just as I had pictured it. Strong shoulders, muscled arms. As he turned back to me and I was shown his chiseled chest and abs, I had to look away to conceal the blush creeping over my skin.

"Getting out?" he called out to me.

I nodded and waited for the redness to fade away before swimming to the edge and accepting his hand to get out. His long fingers were warm against my cold skin and a spark sizzled where he touched me. Quickly, I released his grasp and started toward my shirt on the ground, knowing a new blush would appear if I stayed too long.

I kept my back to him and tugged my wet tanktop off, replacing it with the t-shirt. I turned around to find him staring me unabashedly, a darkness clouding his eyes.

Despite my best efforts, the blush returned anyway.

…

When we returned to the house, Ric gave us a once over and shook his head, obviously deciding it was best not to ask. As I made my way up to my room, Jeremy stopped me in the hallway and apologized.

He told me that he hadn't realized it was a big deal to me for him to keep the stuff. I quietly accepted his apology, not really wanting to get into an argument and continued up to my room.

I grabbed fresh clothes and went back to the second floor bathroom. I made quick work of getting out of my wet, uncomfortable clothes and started a hot bath.

As I slid down into the water, whatever tension I had picked back up from coming back to the house melted away.

I found that the only thing my mind wanted to think about was Damon and unlike earlier at the swing, I allowed myself to.

My mind recalled the image of him climbing out of the lake and him removing his shirt. Water had glistened off his skin like crystals and part of me wished I could've licked them off.

The way his body moved was sensuous. His muscles excited me as his attitude enraged me. I didn't know how to handle him.

Unconsciously, my fingers slid down my skin and under the water until they found the sensitive area between my legs. My mind began conjuring up images that absolutely did not happen, but that I wouldn't mind experiencing.

Damon turned to help me out of the water and then pushed my back against a tree trunk. His lips found their place against my neck and he sucked the skin gently. I pictured his sinfully long fingers brush against my hip and dip beneath my shorts.

Automatically I moaned and massaged the throbbing nub under my fingertips.

I could see his grey-blue eyes staring down at me, watching me react to his manipulation.

"Damon," I gasped quietly, my head lolled back against the tub.

His face moved down my body until his lips were surrounding my nipples, his tongue circling the sensitive area.

My fingers quickened their pace, sparking a buildup in my abdomen.

I imagined his body trapping me against the tree, his fingers sliding effortlessly between my wet folds. "You like that?" mind-Damon asked me darkly.

"Ugh, Damon," I moaned again, my release quickly approaching.

His mouth returned to my neck and I could hear him groan against me. His fingers tweaked my clit several more times before my mouth fell open and my orgasm slammed into me.

I stilled my fingers between my legs as my body tensed and the sensation lapped over me, my clit twitching wildly from the stimulation.

When the orgasm finally faded away, I fell slack into the water, my breathing heavy and my mind racing.

Never in my life had I gotten off to a specific person before. I used to always image faceless guys with amazing bodies doing me the way Matt never could. I guess the guy finally had a face.

I finished washing and dressed in the fresh clothes, wrapping a towel around my wet hair before leaving the bathroom.

As the door opened, my heart stopped in my chest.

Leaning against the wall, directly across from me, was Damon. His arms were folded across his chest and that damn smirk lingered on his lips.

He knew.

Shame washed over me and I could feel my skin go up in flames.

Damon remained quiet as he pushed back from the wall, giving me a quick once over before turning around and walking to his room.

I stood frozen in the doorway, mortified and humiliated.

And this was only my second day there.

A/N: To see the photo Damon took of Elena, go to my tumblr: aphobiac(dot)tumblr(dot)com

See you guys next chapter!