Emily thought she was ready. Wasn't this how it was supposed work? Put on a mask, get invited to a team, then set your own path?
The pain she felt was instant. Hit after hit while she tried protecting her head from the incoming punches. She wasn't sure what to do. Was she even allowed to fight back? Her alone fight against an entire team?
"Bitch, get the fuck off of her!" Grue yelled.
Grue grabbed her back by the arm, but Bitch kept punching with her other arm. "Rachel!" Tattletale yelled, "she's not a threat!"
Not a threat. Those words stung more than anything else. When Regent, Tattletale, and Grue finally managed to pull Bitch off of her, Spitfire found herself crying. It was humiliating. A part of her wanted to believe that their invitation was just a cruel prank, but she knew that everything that had just transpired was all too real.
"What the hell is wrong with you guys?" Spitfire yelled, trying to take the attention away from her crying, "all of you can go to hell!"
She turned around and ran off. Before her plan was to find her place in a scary world, now her only plan was to get as far away from that team as possible. Faced with showing humiliating weakness, she knew she'd never survive with the Undersiders. What kind of team beats someone up for staring at them? But an underlying worry scratched at her backside, will I have to do this alone?
Spitfire needed a team. She knew next to nothing about capes and her destructive powers made her a danger to everyone. If she couldn't get allies, the only futures she saw for herself were either the birdcage or a death sentence.
She breathed heavy, Spitfire was careful not to let her saliva build up as she panted, lest she accidentally burn something. By the time her heart and legs were too tired to take her forward, Spitfire slowed down at the nearby alley dumpster and crouched herself to it's side.
Dawn was setting. The darkness protected her visibility as she pressed her face into her knees to finish crying. The world was becoming more and more scary to her. After she finally regained control of her breathing, she wiped away her tears to try and get her thoughts back in order.
I need a plan, she thought to herself. Her only plan was to join any team, she never considered that some of the teams were completely off the rails. Getting taken advantage by others was a deep fear for her. After what just transpired, she could never show her face to the Undersiders again.
Contemplating her options brought up more doubts. Were they the only team that would accept her? How worse were the other teams? She refused to consider joining the E88 or Merchants. Going solo was a death sentence. New Wave wasn't an option and the Wards were more likely to arrest her.
Faultine's crew was an option. They were mercenaries. Theoretically, they would take anyone. But Emily ideally wanted a team of people that were closer to her age group. A team that she could relate to as a teenager, not be a kid among parental figures.
Then there was one last option. Something that wasn't even an option a month ago. Emily pulled out her smartphone and typed 'The Losers' on the web browser. A video website came up. Each upload had over fifty thousand views, Emily clicked on their latest video.
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"Welcome my bitches and bastards!" The voice on the video feed said. The silver haired girl stood in the center of an alleyway, wearing a Link outfit with a plastic sword at hand. There were three strangers tied together behind her. Her broken mask revealed the bottom half of her face, allowing for her smuggish grin to display. "Today on the Loser's channel, we've taken the liberty enlighten these hitler hipsters that no, the fourth reich isn't happening, and you guys aren't cool for trying to bring it back." She tapped her plastic sword at the tied up victims. "Apparently, these incest loving pagans thought they could get a hit on us."
"And not the good way!" A boy's voice from the background said.
The camera lit a spotlight onto the victims. They were three E88 members with tattoos covered across all their necks and faces. They were tied together by rope and had bruises across their faces. The E88 girl growled at her, "you can go and get fucked!"
"I will later," the Link girl said sticking her tongue out. "But for now, I'm busy screwing you guys over."
"All of you are dead," she growled back, "you really think you can get away with fucking with Kaiser?"
"When you say fuck, do you mean-"
"Captain!" Uber interrupted. The camera turned to reveal him wearing a pink Zelda dress over his robust physique. "Shall we commence the interrogation?" Uber proceeded to take out a pink themed makeup kit. Upon opening it, a dildo fell out.
"Oh, fuck no," one of the victims screeched.
"These guys are just talk," the tied girl said. "They're pussies and they know it."
"The preferred term, is loser." The Link girl leaned down at her, "As in, you're getting your asses kicked by a bunch of losers." She flicked her on the nose and turned around to face the camera.
"So, back to my gentlemen and friends, I'd now like to take the time to enlighten everyone on who these wannabes were messing with." She gestured behind the camera, "Allow me give proper credit to our camera man, Leet!"
There was a grumbling behind the camera, "I'm not coming out with this cosplay."
"But skimpy Shiek is best Shiek."
"No!"
She shrunk her lips, "fine. Special thanks to Leet, our anonymous cameraman. And let me also introduce, Uber. The brawn, muscle, and heart of our team!"
Uber spun around in his pink colored zelda dress. He asked the E88 members, "does this dress make me look fat?"
"Yes," one of them answered. Followed by a headbutt by the girl tied next to him.
"Aaaand... Light!"
The camera turned to a chainmail wearing boy, he held a heavy sword that glowed an ominous blue light. Light mirrored an antagonist from the Legend of Zelda series. "Winter is coming."
"Wrong reference," Leet yelled.
"You're a wizard, Luke."
"Goddamnit man. Do you even game?"
"And I," the girl yelled over them, "leader of the losers, advocate of chaos, agent of the Underlord. Rush!" The camera zoomed out as she lifted her arms up. Heaps of garbage behind her floated and collapsed for a mid second. The ground thumped at once by the demonstration of her power. "We are the losers! The scums of society, the rats that gnaw at your feet, the cockroaches that can never be killed! Whether they be wannabe nazis fake, or protectorate sellouts, our only mission is to watch the world burn. To bring chaos to the secret puppeteers above!"
She pointed at the E88 again, "pawns of the illuminati! Pathetic wretches being used as tools, their blind lust for power shall be their downfall!" She pointed at the camera again, "do you hear that Illuminati? We're coming for you. And when we find you, your fates will be worse than death!"
The video feed cut off. What followed it was a series of images as they drew dicks on the E88 member's faces. Light took the opportunity to put a wig on the man. An image by image process was shown of Rush removing her sock and stuffing it into the girl E88 member's mouth. The final image ended with a bear hug, in which Uber hugged the three of them while wrapping them in a gay pride parade flag. The song "Happy Days" played in the background throughout the montage.
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Emily lowered her cell phone. She was forced to admit that she enjoyed their show. Where as Uber and Leet were originally infamous for their ineptitude and failures, Light and Rush carried the team up into heightened success that no one else thought was possible. It wasn't just a nerd channel anymore. They were all becoming reputable villains wreaking havoc onto Brockton Bay's organizations.
The Losers were mostly thieves. They'd rob jewelries stores across the city, more as a PR stunt than for actual profits. Their livestreams of them running away from the PRT were the highest rated videos on their website. The banter between them and the Wards increased popularity among both the villains and hereos. Clockblocker's fanbase grew tremendously, and there were even rumors that the Wards didn't actually want to capture the Losers.
Even as villains, many people speculated that they were more anti-villain than villain. They robbed more villains than heroes, constantly hitting E88, Merchant, and ABB businesses. And although they stole from everyone, the E88 were the prime targets for their attacks. Nazi puns, ridiculous pranks, constant ridiculing on camera, the E88 were becoming the laughing stocks of the internet.
Emily took a deep breathe. She was a fan of them, but did she really want to join them? They were in Brockton Bay, but Emily's ideal scenario was joining a team and then fading into obscurity. That's why the Undersiders seemed so ideal at first. Now it was either the Losers or Faultline's crew.
It all boiled to a basic question: What did she really want? To join a team that would let her hide? Or join a team that would put her in the limelight?
Was the exposure worth the companionship? She scrolled across the photography section of their websites. There were a few dozen photos of them smiling next to their fallen enemies. On one occasion, they took a group picture with the Wards before confronting each other at a store robbery (the PRT swears it was photoshopped). On another occasion, they took a selfie of themselves hiding, with New Wave hidden in the crowd behind them, thumbing up as though they were planning something devious.
They were each active with their own communities. Light recommended cooking recipes, Uber offered sparring tips online, and Leet gamed with his fans regularly. From the world's perspective, they're lives were stable. Some people even romanticized the villainous life because of them, and Emily couldn't help feel the same way.
At least I'll know what to expect. Emily took another deep breath, and turned on the camera on her cell phone.
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An important trait to have on the internet: Have a personality. People liked to see other people be the extremity of things. The reason this is is because there's a general 'standard' to real life, an etiquette that people have to follow. Manners, respect, courtesy, these are all things people get bored of easily. Which is why people followed internet celebrities; they're deviations of what people are used to.
So, Emily needed to pick a personality for Spitfire. Something that the internet could love, something that the Losers would want to have. She swallowed, and spoke softly to the camera. "My name is Spitfire, and I'm…an arsonist." She fired her burning breathe onto the junkyard behind flames amassed into the air as the metals around her began to melt. "I also enjoy long walks on the beach, Netflix and chilling, and getting upset at people who don't like raisins."
Her voice was oddly shaky, but it wasn't noticed over the sounds of burning metal. "So if the Losers ever need help lighting up a campfire, a bon fire, or a… House fire, Spitfire can help."
The video ended with the flames spreading across into a wall of fire behind her. She breathed through her gas mask and gestured a quick peace symbol to the camera. Emily hoped to give herself an absurd contradiction by the end of her video.
After uploading the footage to their website, she held her hands tightly as she waited for a response. Instantly, the footage became the fastest trending video on the website. People commenting for her to join.
She should rename herself flowers and sunshine.
Thank God someone else loves raisins.
Does walking on the beach include walking on a burning beach?
Emily commented: That's what I meant the first time.
More people endorsed her.
Now they can finally use the catchphrase "let's watch the world burn."
I can finally ship Leet with someone.
Join them, and f*** up that song from Adele.
After fifteen more minutes of waiting, a single message from the main mod become the top rated comment in the video.
She's in. Prepare for the initiation test.