I would like to thank my beta Rayvens Cave for making this readable.

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An hour later, I came back to semi-normal rationality. I was covered in blood but the burn had stopped so I was okay with it, until I realized what I had done.

"What have I done?" I remember asking myself. I stared at my hands as if the had betrayed me. I was in shock; I had taken someone's life….again. I swore that I would never take another life. I had done enough of that already.

After the death of my godfather in my 5th year the War had picked up, so many people had died. I had watched so many of them go down, and the sting had never once lessened.

I sank to the ground holding my head. What sort of monster was I? I managed a look at the corpse, someone that had been alive not even an hour ago my mind hissed at me, I had drained he poor soul of his blood. It hit me. I was a vampire. I no longer had need for food or drink, my magic was unreachable and my life over.

Looking at the body of my first and (Hopefully) last victim, I chuckled. The wizarding world had started to think I was a monster and now I was. Maybe it was one of those ask and you shall receive things?

--

After my first kill, I haunted Surry for about four months. Feeding of the small animals that lived there, and every once and a while I slipped up and killed a homeless person.

For some reason I couldn't leave.

I never returned to my aunt and uncle's I did watch their house for signs of my friends coming to get me….they never did.

I found my amusement in watching the humans. Watching them rush around, like there was never enough time to get things done.

I guess to them it's true, never enough time for anything.

I remember watching several witches and wizards coming and going from my aunts and uncle's house. I remember thinking, it was too late they were four months too late.

--

The only one I ever let see me was Snape, Severus Snape the man that hated me no matter what I did. I could have saved his life one thousand times over and he would have killed me himself to get rid of the debt.

I really liked that man.

--

I had been watching the house, the Dursley's house, for a while I found that watching the people who had come looking for me was very amusing.

I hoped to get a good show out of Snape. With his sarcastic demeanor and acid tongue the poor muggles wouldn't have stood a chance.

"Where is Potter?" He questioned before he even got in the door, his eyes sweeping over the inside of the, it seemed he was expecting me to be hiding there somewhere.

My uncle turned a lovely shade of purple and snarled, "We haven't seen the freak in months! We told the last freaks that came here!"

I watched as Snape's narrowed and he ground his teeth. He was getting angry, and I was enjoying every moment of it.

"When was the last time you saw him?" The professor asked. Dudley answered, "Four month ago. About the same time a body was found. It was burned very badly no one knows who it was. I think it was the freak." The teen sneered pitifully, "Serves him right."

"Here, here!" Vernon agreed.

It was too much I couldn't help it, I laughed softly, and to my surprise, Snape heard me. It was then that I noticed his scent. He was what I had become. I waved a sparkling hand and watched as anger engulfed his features.

I smiled and winked I knew I was playing with fire and was soon going to be burned. With out a look back I ran to the underpass where I was changed.

The professor followed soon after. I beat him there but just barely.

"Potter," He spat. His eyes seemed to be trying to kill me with just a look.

"Professor," I greeted. I smiled again.

"What have you done?" He hissed looking me over.

I raised an eyebrow, "You think I did this? You think I wanted this?" The man gave me a look that said it all.

"I know you Potter. You love this. The fact that everyone is running around trying to find you, worrying about you. Its all about you isn't it Potter?"

I glared back this was not what I had in mind. I snarled at the man. "I didn't want this! This like everything else was forced upon me!"

Snape bared his teeth. "Poor snivelling Potter. Always get the raw end of the deal. You and everyone else in the world you immature little brat we all live like that!"

I growled, "Watch yourself professor." I warned. "I'm not fully in control I would hate it if I accidentally killed you."

The man sneered. "You are a newborn correct?" At my blank look Snape snorted, "You are. You may be stronger but I have more experience. I will not be the one to die."

I lunged at him before he even finished the sentence. I wanted him dead.

He hit the ground hard and I wasted no time in trying to injure him. After a punch to the face, I picked him up and tossed him about four meters.

He retaliated quickly. The rest of the fight was a blur all I know is that I ended up pinning him down.

"All I need is a little help. Just answer my questions and I'll leave you and the wizarding world be." I told him. "Just answer a few questions and you'll never see me again."

Snape seem to be weighing the options. "I give you this information and I never see you again? You will never enter the wizarding world?"

I nodded I just wanted out.

"Let me up, boy, I refuse to answer your questions like this," Snape snapped. I let him up quickly vampire super strength or not he still scared me slightly.

I just stared at him waiting for the go ahead, when the potion's master lost his temper. "Well ask boy!" He shouted.

"Sometimes I can't control myself. It ends badly when I can't. My Occlumency helps but," I shook my head thinking back to the last time slipped up. I had killed an older homeless man.

The hard-faced man looked me over again. "You are doing well for a newborn. Most are unable to think rationally for a year or two after their changing."

I looked away. "When I told you I wasn't in control I wasn't lying." The man nodded, "The psychical changes that you have undergone can be hidden by a glamour, but as you most likely realized you no longer have magic."

I winced when he said that. I knew it was true but it still hurt. Snape saw my wince and gave me a slightly softer look. "I know it can be hard in the beginning but you will grow used to it."

I made a noise of acknowledgement and waved a hand for him to continue, but paused shortly there after.

"You have magic." I stated as I remember seeing him use it. "You were our defense professor last year. Why do you still have yours?" I shouted growing angry

The potions master raised an eyebrow, "It's true I still am I capable of magic."

"How?" I inquired savagely I hated being lied too.

"It's a gift;" He said cryptically, "Some of us are gifted with gifts beyond the imagination. I was blessed." He explained, "I some how retained a small sliver of magic. With it I am able to do what I do. My potions can be done by a muggle, but he would not be able to see the ingredients."

"So, you fake your way through being a wizard?" I asked incredulously. Snape was, in my mind and the minds of others, one of the strongest wizards to date and he faked it.

The man ignored me, "What I cannot do Headmaster Dumbledore does for me." It seemed to take a great amount of effort to say those words.

I closed my eyes trying to take this all in, nothing is as it seems. "Right," I said trying to stabilize myself and get a hold of my raging emotions, my Occlumency was slipping I needed to get back onto topic. "Go back to what we were discussing before I cannot think of this for to much longer."

Snape gave me an odd stare but continued speaking where he left off before. "The thirst should get better as you get older. You do realize that you will not age you are forever sixteen." He didn't wait for conformation. "Animal blood, drink it. Stay away from humans for a while until you get better at not killing them."

I mentally agreed.

"Head to Denali, Alaska, in America, seek out a group of vampires. They are on the same vegetarian diet I am on, ask for Kate she'll get you in contact with a family called the Cullens. The leader Carlisle will help you. Go to him."

I stared at him hard, "Tell me, what if I don't want help? What if I want to die?"

Snape came closer and grabbed my shoulders. "You are confused, take a few years, then if you still want to die find me again, that is the only reason I ever want to see you again."

"That's not good enough. Just tell me how I can die!" I shouted, Snape let go of my shoulder and flexed his hands

Neither of us said anything for a long while, until Snape spoke, "If you truly wish to die, go to Volterra, Italy. Speak to the leaders there. If they agree with you then they will see to it that you die."

I nodded my thanks and left soon after, never noticing Snape examine his burned and blistered hands.

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