No Way Out

Disclaimer :I do not own Criminal Minds.

'We desire most what we ought not to have' ~Publilius Syrus

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Reid lay alone on a bed in a small uncomfortable Florida hotel room. He was soaked in his own sweat even though the ancient air conditoning was running full blast. How was it possible, he wondered, to feel hot and cold at the same time. He wanted to sleep and the mouldy smell of the hotel room was not helping.

Reid was bored with staring at the ceiling, he thought for a change of pace he'd stare at the walls for a while, maybe count the flowers on the tacky wallpaper. Why had JJ checked them into this shit hole of a place?. The walls were paper thin, he swore he could hear Rossi snoring three doors away and could hear Morgan having a supposedly private phone conversation with one of his lady friends right next door.

There were just weird sounds everywhere coming at him from every direction. He threw his pillow at the wall in frustration. He gave up, he obviously was not going to be able to sleep tonight. He might as well get up, he turned on the tv and saw on the weather channel it was currently 86 degrees in St Petersberg and it was expected to be even hotter tomorrow. Growing up in Vegas he was used to heat, but not like this, this semi tropical humidity made him feel like he could barely breathe. He stood up and pulled off his sweat soaked pyjamas, threw them on the floor and plunked his nude body into the nearest chair.

That was a mistake, no sooner had his bottom hit the seat of the rattan chair when he felt a shooting pain in his knee that made him groan out loud. Reid grimaced and grabbed his leg. Morgan next door was suddenly silent. Reid bit his lip in an effort to remain completely still and quiet. The last thng he needed right now was for Morgan to come snooping around asking what was wrong. He relaxed as he heard Morgan resume his conversation.

Spencer sat rubbing his leg debating what he should do. Go down to the bar and have a drink, take a cool bath, raid the mini bar. No, none of those options held any interest for him. He knew what he wanted and it was only a few steps away. He reached over and grabbed his messenger bag, he reached in and pulled out his prescription of Percocet. His mouth watered at the sight. The bottle did not have much left in it, a weeks worth at best and then he would have to either stop or get some more.

He had got the script quite a while ago when he was first shot. He let the doctor fill out the prescription for him but he was deterrmined not to use it, and he hadn't until...

It was the most innocent thing really, he had climbed down into a muddy ditch during a case. Going down had been fine, climbing out had been the problem. The ground had been a little bit wet and slippery and his shoes had slipped in the mud. The casual observer wouldn't have noticed a thing but to Reid it was as if a small grenade had exploded under his kneecap. Newly healed bone and cartilage shifted and stretched in directions they were not supposed to go. He even imagined he could hear his knee popping out of place.

For the remainder of that day the pain was managable. He wished the same could be said the following day when it woke him at 4:30 in the morning. He just went to work early and tried to focus on some case files. It was no use, he found his pills and popped three of them, triple the amount he was supposed to take. Half an hour later he felt great, he was pain free for the first time in months, not to mention slightly buzzed.

From that moment on it became a strange dance of denial for Reid. He knew he took too many pills the first time, so he started with one pill every six hours just like it said on the bottle. One was not enough, two, he thought would be alright as long as he started to wean himself off them when the supply ran low.

The supply was running low. He opened the bottle and popped three into his mouth. He dry swallowed them, causing him to gag a little. He lay back down on his bed. Already he could feel a soothing warmth creep up his spine. The pain in his knee was gone as was the agitation he felt with the noises of the hotel.

This was good, percocet was what he needed. He told himself he could stop this drug easily. Percocet was not dilaudid. Percocet was like a old friend who offered comfort and warmth, while dilaudid was like an insatible lover who wanted to posess you body and mind.

Reid began to drift off to sleep, he could no longer hear the small voice that screamed at him to stop lying to himself. The drug had silenced it.

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At 7:30 the next morning, Spencer was awakened by a insistant knocking at his door.

"Reid, hey Reid, you in there?" It was the voice of Derek Morgan.

Reid yelled out a garbled response and headed to the door. It felt very drafty all of a sudden. Spencer looked down at himself and realized he almost answered the door completely naked.

"Hold on!" he yelled. Reid grabbed the bedsheet off the floor and wrapped it around his waist. He half hobbled over to the door and pulled it open. Morgan stood there with two take-out coffees and David Rossi beside him. The two men were slightly taken aback by Reid's appearance.

"Did we interrupt a toga party?" asked Rossi with a smirk on his face.

Reid ignored him and spoke to Morgan. "What is it?"

Morgan grinned at his young colleague. "Hotch wants us to be ready to leave at nine sharp, here, I brought you a coffee,"

Reid took the coffee and almost lost his sheet. "Thanks," he mumbled.

Rossi gave him a once over "Ya know Reid, I never took you for a sleep in the buff guy"

"I was hot last night" he explained. He was becoming irritated. He wished they would go away and let him drink his coffee. Reid thanked them again and tried to shut the door. Derek blocked it with his hand. He wore a more serious expression on his face.

"Everything ok? I thought I heard you yell last night." Morgan said.

Reid pretended to look puzzled. "No, I'm ok, must have been the TV," he lied.

This time he did shut the door. He felt shaky, he noticed he had left the pill bottle right out in the open. They might have seen it. He sat on the bed, opened the bottle and took out 2 pills and washed them down with hot coffee. He sighed with relief when he felt the effects come over him.

'Good, that will do me till I get home and I only took two,' he thought. 'This will not be a problem,'

Reid felt in a much lighter mood. He busied himself packing and thought he had time for breakfast, then changed his mind. He really wasn't hungry. Coffee was all he needed. He caught his reflection in the mirror and for a split second he almost didn't recognize himself, it was like he had seen a stranger looking back at him through his eyes. He shivered and took another look; it was just him.

He cheerfully carried on as if he didn't recognize the signs. His life was about to unravel.

FIN

AN: This was mean't to be a one shot, but I guess it had more to say. Please read and review