Dark times
This is a continuation of the previous chapter. Enjoy!
As strong as she may look, as bold as she may sound, deep down she is broken, just like the rest of them. The avengers' first encounter (excluding Clint) of Natasha's nightmare. Will they be able to save her from herself?
I do not own the avengers.
|~.~.~|
Heart pounding, sweat pouring, Natasha hurried out of her room. She walked as far away from her room as possible, to the training room in the basement.
Just breathe you're fine. It's ok. Steve wasn't hurt. Clint saved you, you're fine.
She paces around the room anxiously. She had nightmares constantly, but this one was different. She usually saw flashes of her past, but woke up before she screamed.
This time, she heard Loki's voice loud and clear.
"Can you? Can you wipe that much red?" he smirked.
His voice rang as she remembered the innocent girls she killed to survive and the missions she had succeeded in. Then she was trapped all over again, looking straight at the hulk. She saw Clint's blue eyes when he was being controlled by Loki. Then she saw herself in the red room, a girl in front of her. A girl she had to kill to survive.
That is when she felt a hand grabbing her arm, as she pulled out the knife that she always sleeps with.
No stop. It's over. Past is the past.
She tries hard to convince herself, knowing that she won't succeed. Natasha slowly moves to the punching bag and punches it over and over again. She feels a burst of pain spreading through her knuckles.
Better physical pain than emotional. Don't feel just do.
She felt a sob clutched at her throat. She swallows it. Crying was for the weak.
|~.~.~|
After they saw her leave, Tony is the first to speak.
"Can we talk about it." he asks.
Everyone turns to look at him. Silence replaces his words. Clint breaks the silence.
"We should give her moment. Maybe she is dealing with something" he states.
"She jumped on Capsicle, she is certainly not stable. And shouldn't we at least be there for her through th- whatever this is?" Tony argues.
"Not now, not this fast. Clint's right, and he knows her more than all of us. Leave her alone for today. Let's talk to her tomorrow at breakfast." Steve says.
|~.~.~|
After an hour or so of punching, she sat down on the gym floor, out of breath, holding her purple and swollen hand.
Pathetic
She stood up, not willing to go wherever the avengers were, she changed into a plain shirt and sweatpants and headed out the gym. According to Jarvis, Tony was in his lab with Bruce, Clint was out on a mission, Thor left the compound to visit Asgard, and Steve was in his room. She silently headed to the kitchen and made herself a big cup of coffee. When she was about to pour her coffee into her cup, she was stopped by a voice.
"Hey." Steve mumbles. Ignoring the idea of "giving her a moment."
Natasha immediately drops the pot of coffee, which spills on her foot. When the hot coffee touches her bare feet, she jumps back and quickly searches for a towel.
"I am so sorry, I didn't mean to startle you." Steve apologizes.
"Jeez Rogers, never sneak up on a spy." Natasha smirks.
She tries to ignore the pity in his eyes as she cleans up the hot coffee on the floor.
Please don't mention this morning. Please. I don't want to… not yet. Natasha thinks.
"Nat," Steve starts, concern in his voice. "Can we please talk about this morning?"
Natasha ignores him as she picks up the loose glass pieces off of the floor into the garbage disposal. Steve doesn't give up.
"Please Natasha, everyone is worried. We've never seen you like this." he worries.
As he spoke, Natasha tightens up as she finished up cleaning. When she reaches for the top cupboard to put her empty coffee mug away to flee the situation, Steve spots her swollen knuckles.
"Nat, what happened to your hand." he asks.
Natasha immediately freezes in her spot. She closes the cupboard with a slam, as she walks out of the kitchen.
Steve looks at her back with sorrow. He didn't want to lose another friend after he lost Bucky. He doesn't want to experience the terror and hopelessness again. He wanted her to know that the avengers were there for her no matter what.
Thank you for reading my fanfic! I think I will continue writing this fanfic with each avenger's encounter w/ Nat after the nightmare. I started off with Steve since he is the most empathetic out of all the avengers.
This story was inspired by Amanda ;)
Please comment on who you want Nat to encounter in the next chapter!
Who should be the one that Natasha lets in?