Finally! It's the overdue second chapter of The Expressions of Yuki Nagato! I know I said I'd try to update every week, but I've been pretty unlucky for the past month or so. Lost all of my documents (including a good amount of this chapter), and my motivation went with it. I've been spending a lot of time trying to get my programs to work again, and can't even get MSN working very well. Oh well. Things will get better when I get a new computer, but that won't be for quite some time.
Anyway, I was going to make this chapter longer, but I realized that it's already long enough, and it reached a good stopping point. This is about half of what i was going to write, so the second half will be the next chapter. Hopefully that will be online faster than this update.
To all my reviewers: Thanks, I appreciate the feedback. And I went back to fix all those typos for you! I really do feel bad for making you wait this long, so I'll really try to get chapter 3 up as soon as possible.
Without further ado, Chapter 2: The Novel Which Is Life!
Haruhi, Haruhi, Haruhi! Damn that girl makes my life hell, even when she's nowhere to be found. Well, at least I don't have to deal with Koizumi's philosophical jargon. All I know right now is that there are keys out there, and I'm supposed to find them. The deadline was either yesterday or today, I'm still not sure. So it comes down to the fact that I'm in distress and Nagato's the one to save me again. How many times has it been now? It doesn't really matter, it gets solved somehow, and Haruhi never knows the difference, even with being the cause of it all.
Honestly, I'm somewhat sick of it. Haruhi just drags everyone along on her numerous schemes, and no one stops her. She ignores me, Koizumi just supports everything she says, Asahina is too timid to try to stop her, and Nagato… just reads. I never had a choice with Haruhi around. Never had a choice about being a part of the SOS Brigade. Never had a choice to be put in all sorts of dangerous situations.
But all that's gone now. Does that mean I have the choice? Given that, I figure I'm supposed to find these keys, which would mean going back to reality, back to the SOS Brigade. Or I could keep things this way, couldn't I? I have been complaining about not having a choice in the matter since the beginning, though I have to admit it's been kind of fun. From going into another dimension to meet a giant cave cricket, to traveling three years into the past, to just sitting in the Brigade room playing games with Koizumi. It was all fun, but is it what I really want?
This morning's definitely not being kind to me. Not only did I have indecision induced insomnia, but my sister fell off the bed as she was jumping on me to wake me up. And now Taniguchi's back, even if he is only forty percent himself. Class four, my class, is all looking at me like some sort of circus animal.
"I've heard you've become the class clown while I was gone." Maybe this is the circus. That doesn't stop my blundering idiot of a friend, however. "So, what's her name again?"
"Haruhi Suzumiya."
"Why… Why would you be looking for her? How do you know her?"
"Little bit of dementia, that's all."
After pretty much the same speech I got at the start of school, I finally find out that Haruhi is attending Kouyouen Academy.
Kyouen… That's the pre-disappearance all girls school at the bottom of the hill we North High students walk up and down every day. It's a rather prestigious school, so they definitely have the normal half day for this time of year, unlike us, who have to endure full length days. Why do we have the bad luck? Let's face it, North High is full of idiots. So that means I have thirty minutes if I'm going to track Haruhi down, or at least have a chance at it.
But what happens if I do?
I still have things I want to do in the proper reality, but I really doubt I can return here. And this Nagato seems to lonely, I feel like I can't just leave her. With how many things didn't change, could it be that the SOS Brigade Nagato was lonely before all this? Speaking of Nagato, why is it she's the only Brigade member I talk to in this world? Did she think this whole thing up? Does that mean she wants me to choose, like I never got to before? She's the one who gave me the option of finding the keys, so she would make them something I can find, wouldn't she? And if I go back, that'd mean the SOS Brigade gets back together. So the keys are Haruhi, Koizumi, Asahina, Nagato, and myself? Could it really be that simple? And how would the keys just magically work? Did Nagato place them here in advance, or was she the one who did it? So in the end, it's still my choice to make.
I have to say, staying in school knowing students anywhere else have already gone home is excruciatingly boring. And it doesn't help I can't pay attention to my class to save my life, though I never can even when I don't have a predisposition like today. After the final bell, the class throws their hats to the air and rushes out the door. While pretty much everyone else is in a rush to go home or to hang out with friends, I have a different destination in mind. It's a five minute walk, five minutes I have to decide what I'm going to say. Why do I need to plan my conversations anymore? It's not like Haruhi will be there to unleash avatars of destruction in a world of grey if I say the wrong thing. I don't always have to distance myself. I guess I do really like this world after all.
I knock on the door out of habit, since I'm still subconsciously afraid Mikuru would be inside changing. But of course she isn't. She's spending her time in the calligraphy club, like she was before the SOS Brigade ever formed. At least this way she isn't constantly being sexually harassed by a certain overlord-like brigade chief. Though I will miss the tea she served so full of pride and joy every day after school. She'll make an excellent wife for one hell of a lucky guy some day.
Not hearing a response to my knock, I can't tell if Nagato is in the room or not. But, this being Nagato, I'm fairly certain that she is. She doesn't have anywhere else to go, as far as I know. As I enter, Yuki looks at me, but obviously avoids eye contact. I can't blame her, as the last time we talked, I told her what was my truth, but to her it was a blatant lie. I could possibly have broken her fragile heart back there. "Please be serious about anything important with Nagato. She's a fragile girl, and I'd never forgive you if you hurt her." Asakura's words float into my mind. I don't want to think about what she'd do to me.
"I hope you don't mind that I came back." I'm met with silence, as I expected. She really doesn't know when to say something to put a guy at ease.
The situation is quite discomforting, and I can't help but to fidget. As I am, I realize there's a crumpled piece of paper still in my pocket. I take it out and stare at it a few moments. Yuki looks close to tears in the corner of my eye. She must think I'm rejecting her, since the club application is obviously still blank.
"I've decided the past is the past, and it's time to write a new future," I smile, looking at her amethyst eyes. "And all there is to do, is to live in the present."
Nagato's eyes widen as I finish speaking, like I'm something she had never seen before. Thinking about it, it really isn't like me to give motivational speeches. All I know is I'm done with the SOS Brigade, and my future lies with this Literary Club, or should I say it lies with Nagato. If I just keep worrying about everything, I'll just have gray hair before I'm twenty. I'm surprised I hadn't given up yet and tried to mash up, up, down, down, B, A, B, A, start. With Haruhi around, even a cat would lose all its lives.
"What I'm saying is I want to join the Literature Club, if that's all right with you still."
Yuki nods. Someday I'll get her to overcome her lack of social skills, but that will take quite some time. But I know she can do it, her previous self was one tiny muscle at a time.
The next couple days are pretty nonchalant. Nothing happens really worth mentioning. I skim over books, while Nagato reads one thick sci-fi novel after another. She's on her third one this week. I'm amazed that there's still enough books to go around. The slight conversation we have is mostly me just trying to get her to open up a bit more, and be more comfortable around me. My latest save state is about ten really good attempts, and half a success. I guess I'll just take what I can get and select 'continue' from the main menu.
This Nagato is considerably different from the Nagato I've known from the SOS Brigade, though, on the same note, she's definitely similar. The both love their sci-fi novels, they both are quieter than a ghost, and they both spend all their time in this room. The most noticeable difference, aside from her wearing glasses again, is that I catch this one looking up at me from her book from time to time. Did her humanoid interface self do that as well, and I just didn't notice? Now it's going to bug me for a while.
"Is something the matter?" Nagato puts her book down, looking at me with inquisitive eyes. And that's when I realize I was staring at her.
"It's nothing," I pause, wondering what she's thinking, "I think you look better without glasses."
"Oh." I've probably confused her more times than either of us can count since I've shown up to the Literary Club.
Several minutes pass before I realize how late it's gotten. As if almost on cue, Yuki puts away her book, and announces her intent to go home. I whole heartedly agree, and make my own preparations to home, including a mental pep talk about Sisyphus's Hill. But as we're leaving the room, a thought occurs to me.
"Hey," I'm not exactly good with original ways to get someone's attention, okay? "I've been wondering, what do you do on the weekends?"
"Read."
"That's all?"
She nods.
"Well, I think it's a good idea to try to do things you like, but can't do during the week because of school."
I'm answered with a look I can't quite read. It is curiosity? Or is it…. Hope?
"How would you like to spend tomorrow with me? I mean, I'm sure you would enjoy going out with a friend, wouldn't you?"
"It would be enjoyable."