I tried not to make you guys cry...that much. Enjoy :)

"Olivia, Brian, nice to see you again." George said as the couple sat down across from him. "How are things?"

Brian grabbed Olivia's hand. "We went to Jason's grave yesterday, and I think we're moving in the right direction."

George noticed that the couple did look happier since the last time he saw them. He looked over at Olivia. "Are we any closer to cleaning out Jason's room?"

She nodded. "I'm planning on doing it today. Leaving it the way it is makes it seems like he's coming back..." She trailed off as tears pricked her eyes. She was honestly so tired of crying, and wanted to be happy again, but her happiness died along with Jason. "...and I know that'll never happen."

Brian squeezed Olivia's hand to signal that he was there for her.

George took a deep breath. "Did you guys tell each other what we talked about last week in our private sessions?"

They both nodded and George was definitely surprised. Brian and Olivia were the most stubborn people in the world, and Brian would never want to hurt Olivia intentionally. "Well, how did that go?"

Olivia spoke first. "I needed to hear that he blamed me. It may be weird, but it helped. In my head, I keep thinking that this is a nightmare that'll I wake up from, but it's not. Hearing someone besides myself blame the situation on me helped."

"Brian, do you still blame her?"

"Not anymore. I'm not going to lie, it took awhile to do so, but it wasn't her fault. It wasn't anyone's fault, and I wish she would stop blaming herself."

George shifted in his seat uncomfortably at Brian's last statement that didn't go unnoticed by Olivia. "Olivia, do you blame yourself because the seat belt wasn't secure?"

"No. I blame myself because I was speeding, it was storming, I ran a red light, and the seat belt wasn't secure. Honestly, this was my fault, and I'm starting to live with it. I'm never going to get over the fact that I killed my son, and I pray he forgives me for what I did to him."

"Is that why you want another baby?"

Olivia tried to calm herself down before she answered the question. She hated feeling weak. She hated not feeling like herself, and in this moment, she hated herself. "It is. I feel as if it's the least I can do for ending his life so soon and all."

Brian let out a loud groan.

"Problem?" George asked looking in Brian's direction.

"I just hate when she talks like this. I hate hearing her constantly blame herself. Nobody could have seen this coming. I just want my wife back. This isn't her. I know a loss can change a person, because it sure as hell changed me, but it hurts and frustrates me that she thinks of herself as a murderer."

"I'm sorry, but I can't change the way I feel. No matter what, I'm going to live with this guilt for the rest of my life. If it frustrates you that much, I just won't bring it up to you. Problem solved." She snapped back. She felt as if Brian was trying to tell her she was wrong for how she was feeling.

"That's not what I meant, Liv. I just hate seeing you hurt like this. We both lost our son, but you're carrying the burden more because you think you killed him, and you didn't. It honestly feels like I lost both my son and wife that day, and I can't deal with it any longer."

George couldn't help but to feel guilty while he listened to them go back and forth. This was going to tear them apart. Putting his career to the side, he cared about both of them deeply, and knew he had to stop this. "How does that make you feel, Olivia?"

She shook her head and removed her hand from Brian's. "What do you mean you feel like you lost your wife?"

"Emotionally, mentally, and sexually, I lost my wife. You may be here physically, but you're not all the way here. I can barely get an I love you out of you nowadays. That hurts."

"Well, I'm sorry for mourning the loss of our son." She crossed her arms and legs and bit her lip to fight back a new wave of tears. It seemed as if her whole life was falling apart, and she didn't know how to stop it.

"You can't keep using that as an excuse! I mourn too. You don't think I cry at night thinking about how I'll never go to a sports event of his or teach him how to respect girls? You don't think this hurts me as much as it hurts you? I have to hide my emotions to be strong for you because you seem like you'll fall off the edge at any moment." Brian finally blew up. He couldn't hold his emotions in anymore. He looked over at Olivia, and the look she had on her face broke his heart.

Her chin was trembling and she no longer fought the tears. After being with her for so long, he could read her like an open book.

He shouldn't have yelled at her like that. "I'm sorry, Liv." He tried to reach out to touch her, but she jerked away from him.

"Don't touch me. You said what you had to say, and I said what I had to say. Happy fucking 10th anniversary to you too, Brian." She got up and stormed out the room.

"Fuck!" Brian buried his face in his hands.

George cleared his throat. The tension in the room had just grown to unstandable levels. He's seen couples fall apart because of the death of a child, and he refused to let it happen to friends of his. "It looks like we need to cut this session short." He had a phone call to make.

"Liv, can we talk about this?" Brian asked as they walked in the house.

"I think you've done enough talking for one day." She said as she walked upstairs.

Brian sighed. This was not how he wanted to spend his 10th year wedding anniversary, and he refused for it to be tension between them like this. He followed her. "No, we're going to talk about this. Us not talking is what caused this."

She turned around and looked him dead in the eye. "What do you want me to do? Fuck you? Tell you I love you?"

"That would be a nice start." Brian said as they walked in the bedroom.

She squinted her eyes at him. "Are you serious right now?"

"Are you serious right now? You're upset because I said I don't feel loved by you? This is why! Every time we talk, we're arguing or crying over Jason. I just want to feel happy again. I want you happy again. Your smile is the light of my life, and I haven't seen it in months."

"What..what am I suppose to do, Brian? My life, it's falling apart. I ran out of therapy today because what you said scared me. If I lose you..." She shook her head and let the tears fall freely. "I'll have nothing to live for."

"No, you're not losing me. I love you more than life itself, and we've been through too damn much to give up now." He walked up to her and cupped her face in his hands. "This rough patch is just a test of our love."

"I don't understand how you could love me after all of this. You're amazing to me." She looked him in the eyes. "I love you."

"Good." He smiled. "Can I kiss you?"

Olivia leaned in and pressed her lips to his softly. This was different than the kisses they shared over the last 6 months. Those were just "I'm going to work, see you later." kisses. This one had emotion and passion behind it. She couldn't lie, she missed the intimacy between them. Brian was right, she did forget about him.

When air was needed, they both pulled away smiling. They knew they had a long road of recovery ahead, but it was worth it, because they were with each other.

"Happy anniversary, Liv." Brian said with their foreheads still touching. He looked her in the eyes, and for the first time in a long time, he saw Olivia again.

"Can you help me with Jason's room?"

He grabbed her hand and led her to the end of the hall where Jason's room was at. Neither of them had moved anything since the last day Jason was alive. When Olivia did occasionally sleep in there, she found a spot in the corner and slept there.

"I don't even know why you asked." Brian turned around and looked at her making sure she she wanted to do this. "You ready?"

She nodded, as she already felt the tears burning her eyes. This was something she would have to do so she could move on. It was going to hurt like hell, but she was more than grateful that Brian was going to be by her side.

Brian sighed before he opened the door. In all honesty, he wasn't ready for this at all. He tried to avoid coming in here as much as possible. He tried acting like this didn't happen. He pushed all his feelings down, and he was soon going to regret it.

"They need to know. We can't keep this from them anymore, or they're going to end up divorced." George said.

"Until we know the coast is clear, this has to stay between you and me."

"What about him? You don't think this is hurting him too? If they aren't better the next time I see them, I'm telling. I don't care if I lose my job or my license. My friendship with them is much more important."

"George, that wouldn't be smart. Then you'll be in danger, and who's going to have your back?"

"You're not in those sessions. You're not looking in the eyes of a broken woman who thinks she killed her son! You're not seeing a 10 year marriage slowly disintegrate because of a lie! Don't tell me what the hell isn't smart, because this whole plan wasn't smart at all." And with that, George stormed out the house. He knew if he wanted this all to end, he would have to do it himself.

The last time Brian and Olivia felt like this was after the funeral. They just sat in their bedroom silent crying, thinking about what they just did.

"He's gone." Olivia choked out in a raspy whisper.

"I know." Brian replied.

"And it's all my fault." She curled up into a ball and sobbed loudly. She just buried her son. Something a parent should never have to do.

"Liv, how many times do we have to go over this? It isn't your fault."

She didn't reply. She heard that so many times today, and she still didn't believe it. No one was in that car with her. She knew that if she was driving safely, and paying attention, none of this would be happening.

Brian figured she wasn't in the mood to talk, and to be honest he wasn't either. He just wanted to wake up from this horrible nightmare, except it was reality. He got up from the bed. "You want a beer?"

"No. Vodka." She mumbled.

He knew where this was headed. "On the rocks?" He asked. It was her signature drink nowadays.

"No. Bring the bottle."

"Liv.."

"Brian, bring me the damn bottle, or I'll get it myself." She hated that she was turning to alcohol to get rid of the pain. She hated that she was turning into her mother, but the worst part is, she hated herself.

There was no need to fight with her, or to even try and compromise. Brian knew her way too well. Olivia was going to come out of this situation one of two ways, and so far, she was going down the wrong path.

Now, they were sitting in the middle of a nearly empty bedroom. They had got rid of the furniture, most of his clothes, and toys. They clothes and toys they kept had memories attached to them that couldn't be replaced.

"I swear, if we would have let him, Jason would have worn this shirt everyday." Olivia said as she held up a navy blue shirt that said "Both of my parents are cops, therefore, I am a cop."

Brian chuckled. "He slept in it every night, along with the bear my mom gave him."

"He was such a perfect child." Olivia leaned on Brian's shoulder and folded the shirt in her lap. "He was always smiling, like you could never be in a bad mood with him around."

Brian was silent for a moment. "Whatever is going on with us right now, he wouldn't want it."

"I know." She whispered. "He would probably put us in time-out." She said smiling.

"Liv, what the hell do you think you're doing?"

"Packing your things. I want you out my house, now!" Olivia said throwing Brian's things in a garbage bag.

"Why can't we talk about this?"

She looked at him and twisted her lips in a frown. "There's no need to talk about the fact that you slept with a slut while you were undercover. Your son and I hadn't heard from you in days before you came home."

"My cover would have been blown!"

Olivia rolled her eyes and went back to 'packing' for him. "Just like she blew you. Did you not think I was going to find out?"

"Are you kidding me?" He walked over to her. "Olivia, I love you more than anything. My life was in danger, and I did what I had to do. Am I happy with what I did? No, but I didn't have any other choice."

"I don't want to hear it." She handed him the bag. "Just go." She whispered as her eyes begin to well up. Through everything her and Brian had been through, she didn't think she would have to add infidelity to the list.

"Just listen to me, baby, please." He begged her. He wasn't ready to just give this up.
"JUST GO!" She screamed at the top of her lungs. Her emotions were boiling over. She had enough.

"Daddy, don't go." Jason came bursting in the bedroom with tear stained cheeks. He had heard the whole argument.

Both Olivia and Brian's heart broke at the sight. They didn't want Jason to have to see them like this, but there was no way to avoid it.

Brian squatted down to his level. "I'm sorry, kiddo. I'll be back in the morning."

"Stay!"

"Jas, I'll be back. I promise. Mommy and I just need a few days apart."

"But, you just got back."

Olivia was watching the scene between them, and realized this was hurting Jason more than it was hurting her.

"I know. I love you." Brian kissed his forehead before he stood back up. He looked over in Olivia's direction. "I love you too." He started to walk towards the door, but Jason blocked him.

"No, stay."

Olivia spoke up. "You know how when you do something bad, you have to go in time-out? Well, that's what daddy is doing. He'll be back."

Jason shook his head. "No. Time-out here. Both of you." He walked out the room and shut the door behind him. "Five minutes!" He yelled from the other side of the door.

"He was so mature for his age. I forgot he was five sometimes. Whether we realize it or not, Jason helped us with so many things." Brian said as he was walking around the room absorbing the memories. His son was the best thing that happened to him besides marrying Olivia, and now it was heartbreaking to think about the fact he would never see his face or hear his voice or see him smile anymore.

"I'm ready." Olivia walked down the stairs in a knee-length dark purple dress. Her hair was full of bouncy curls, and she had on light make-up.

Brian turned around and his jaw dropped. It wasn't the first time he had seen Olivia in this dress, but she seemed to just get more beautiful. "You look absolutely amazing."

"Thank you." She smiled and even blushed a little.

"I see why this was Jason's favorite dress of yours. You just took my breath away." Brian said still raking his eyes over Olivia.

"Bri..." He knew how much she hated him drooling over her like a dog, but at the same time, she was happy she still had that effect on him.

His eyes lit up as soon as he heard his nickname. "I'm Bri again?"

"For now, but if you don't feed me soon, you'll be Sergeant Cassidy." She said grinning.

"After you, baby."

XXXXXXXXX

"Brian, I can't believe you got reservations here." Olivia said as she allowed Brian to pull out her seat.

"I pulled a few strings, beat up a few people. No big deal." He chuckled. "I'll do anything to see that smile on your face."

She smirked. "An illegal romantic? Boy, did I luck up."

"I mean, he's pretty sexy too."

"True, but you know something else about him?"

Brian raised an eyebrow. "What?"

She leaned over the table and whispered. "He's getting laid tonight." She sat back down in her seat and smirked at his reaction.

Brian felt his friend twitch and he gulped. "Seriously?"

"I don't leave the house without underwear on for no reason. Happy 10 year anniversary."

Brian was two seconds away from grabbing Olivia and taking her home. "You need to stop before I take you to the bathroom." He managed to get out before the waitress came to their table.

"Can I start you guys off with some drinks?"

"I already ordered ahead. It should be under Cassidy."

The waitress face lit up. "Oh, you guys are the Cassidys? Happy anniversary! I'll get your wine and appetizers." She walked away.

"Brian, you really did pull some strings. I..."

"Don't thank me. You've been married to me for 10 years. You deserve the world. I don't know how and why you put up with me for all these years, but I'm happy you did." He pulled a box out of his pocket. "That's why I got you this." He opened it, and revealed a diamond band. "It's about time I make your finger shine a little bit brighter."

Olivia didn't try to hold back her tears. Brian treated her like a queen, and she doesn't know why he thinks he doesn't deserve her. "Bri," she held out her left hand for him to put the band on. "You've been the best husband anyone could ask for. We've been through the ringer, and I still fall in love with you more and more everyday. I'm the one that doesn't deserve someone as good as you. I love you."

"Let's just say we both don't deserve each other, but we deserve the world, and for as long we been together, we've been giving each other that." He leaned over the table, and Olivia met him in the middle for an earth-shattering kiss. They were going to survive this. They were going to be okay.

Brian pushed Olivia against the wall and ran his hands up and down her sides. "No panties, huh?"

"Not even a thong." She ran her hands over his chest.

"You are such a bad girl." He began to kiss and lick at her neck.

She tilted her head to the side to give him better access. "Very bad. I should be punished." She gasped when she felt his teeth sink into her neck.

"Already of ahead of you." He lifted her up and she wrapped her legs and arms around him.

Olivia started kissing Brian, hard as he carried them up the stairs. She ran her fingers through his hair, and every step they went up, she bounced against his hard member, and the would both groan into the kiss. It had been too long and Olivia felt like she was going to explode already.

Brian finally got them in the room, and he threw Olivia on the bed. He pulled off his clothes quickly while Olivia go rid of her dress.

He grunted when he saw Olivia laying on the bed in just her strapless bra, waiting for him to take control. "Fuck." He hovered over Olivia and stared in her eyes. "I love you."

She placed her hand on the back of his neck. "I love you, and tonight, I'm going to be in charge."

"But why?"

"Earlier today you said saying "I love you.", and fucking you would be a nice start to us getting better, so..."

Brian smiled and rolled off her. "Say no more." He put his hands behind his head. "I'm all yours."