*Sorry - Jamie will be spelled "Jaime" until Chapter 4 - VERY SORRY!
Chapter 2: Days of June
The next day Jaime rushed to group and met up with June a few minutes before the session started.
"You don't think there's a way to meet in another way, do you?" He whispered to her. A chill raced up her spine as she felt his breath caress and tickle her ear.
"We can't." she whispered back, "I'm surprised the counselors even let us have group together. They're very strict about avoiding boy girl relationships - I guess they want to create a laid back kind of environment."
"You see," Jaime retorted, "I'm not sure that I quite understand the logic in that - you're already dealing with people on the verge of suicide. and I'm not sure how anybody could live without you." She blushed and then laughed at him.
"You really are something!" June sighed, turning around as the session began. "I just wish the rest of the world felt the same way." She seemed as if she wasn't even talking to him anymore - Jaime didn't respond but nudged up closer to her. They will someday, he thought to himself. After the meeting, the two were greeted by the female counselor, who hastily pulled them aside. They both stood close to each other, nervous.
"Now," the counselor started, "the reason why we allow boys and girls to share these particular group sessions - is because it is the only truly supervised time - and we feel that it lightens frustrations when opposite sexes interact - or at least brings people, who would other wise ditch, to the group - but we don't intend for it to be a meeting place to develop romantic relationships. now, if you in fact have - I suggest you keep it at a limited view to others. or else you won't have a relationship at all." She raised her eyebrows seriously and then left the two standing side by side. When she left, the two rolled their eyes at each other, giggled, conversed on whether or not they had romance, and then dispersed.
It was a Saturday afternoon, Jaime knew because he had been keeping his own calendar - it frightened him to think that he could forget the days - he didn't pay attention to the adults that just never seemed to stop talking - he had to rely on himself. And on that day, for the first time, him and his fellow teens, at least the ones in his group session, would go out into the world - to the local swimming pool. All the counselors said how it was vital to let them "go outside and release some energy, as long as it was under proper supervision." Jaime had been dreading this day ever sense the trip was mentioned.
At nine in the morning, the teens gathered their things and piled onto a bus, excited to breathe fresh air that was far away from their prison-like sanctuary. Jaime didn't bother to borrow a suit, due to the fact that he didn't have one, because he didn't swim. However, a counselor practically forced him to. Swimming was one thing he did not do - and he wasn't planning on doing it in the near future. Finally, the bus made a jerky stop after fifteen minutes of jerky ride, and a gleam of hope sprinkled over him as he remember that he could see June's face - she was on the girl's bus. They lined up in the isles and hopped out of the bus, one by one, their eyes adjusting to the bright sun, which spilt off the pool house's roof and poured onto the tops of their heads. Jaime studied the crowd of faces for June - only to observe a circus of diverse personalities, some loudly talking, some very comfortable and anxious, and others solemn and almost scared - like him. But where was June?
Then he saw her. her dark hair contrasting with her somewhat pail, yet angelic, skin. She wore a short flowery top with frayed blue jeans complimenting her thin, light-skinned, bare stomach. "Jaime!" She squealed, racing over to him.
"June." he said. The two were inseparable - although her girlfriend's tried to pull her away. But he began to tense up as they neared the pool and everybody began undressing and edging towards the shallow, clear blue water. His mind became clouded with confusion - he didn't swim, but what if they made him? What about his scars, would people see? What if he couldn't handle being near the water? What if he freaked out? What would everybody think? He had to leave. so after telling June that he'd see her later he rushed to the nearest bathroom, only to have a counselor follow him.
"Jaime, where are you going?" The tall male counselor asked, grabbing Jaime's shoulder with his strong fingers.
"To the bathroom." he laughed, "what? You don't trust me to go and take a piss?" The counselor nodded his head and waited outside as Jaime entered the bathrooms - which looked as though they were built with millions of brown, black, and white pebbles. He instantly splashed some cold water on his face - sensing the irony of his action - and stared at himself in the mirror - his dark eyes, his soft features, predominant lips, and rugged hair - but pale and quivering - how was he going to handle this? After a few minutes, knowing he was being waited on, he hastily exited and tried to sit as far away from the pool - trying to blend in with the others who were also avoiding swimming. But then June spotted him, and he felt that oh so familiar heat overcome him and he blushed, gently rising from the chair that he was sitting on.
"Come on in, Jaime." she sighed, a huge smile revealing her dimples. She had already jumped in, her long hair even longer and even curlier and droplets of water forming around her bright eyes.
"I sun burn really badly, June." he explained, backing away.
"So don't take your shirt off," June sensed his insecurity.
"Besides I don't like to swim." He added, sitting back down. But she grabbed his arm tightly and urged him to jump in with her.
"Do you know how?" She asked. "Because I can teach you - we have a lake house. oh, I love to swim!"
"Yes, I've swam before - but I don't anymore." He suddenly became louder and more defiant - almost angry.
"Why not?" She giggled, pulling him closer to the water. She then jumped in, splashing him. "Please come in." she pouted her lips and then smiled, ducking underneath. He watched her blurred figure dive around underneath the surface, like a mermaid. And then as he glared deeper into the waves. his eyes became more distant and June noticed, climbing out of the waves that she had created. "Jaime?" she sighed, snapping in front of his eyes. He suddenly glanced up at her.
"I have to get out of here." he said, "It's not you." he stormed off and hid out until the trip ended, solemnly returning to the bus, without June - although she watched him the whole time, sympathetically.
During lunch the next day, Jaime made his way to a tough looking group at the center of the cafeteria. The three strangers glared over at him, implying that he wasn't welcome.
"Guys." he stated daringly, "I'm in need of something and I was wondering if you knew how to get it."
"No way," the leader chuckled, as though he had entertained this request quite a bit. He was a big guy with soft blue eyes and bold lips and he rested his elbows across the cold table. "There's no way to smuggle stuff in or get around the security to get out of here - people have tried it, only to get caught and sent to juvie. and if you think this place is bad, you just go to juvie and this place will be heaven."
"Just give in dude." another added, "the food really isn't that bad, and you'll be out of here soon enough." Jaime clenched his teeth together in frustration.
"You mean to tell me there aren't any connections inside?" He interrogated skeptically, his anger rising.
"Not that I know of." the leader replied, "and believe me if anybody knew it would be me."
"I don't believe you. What are you afraid of, that I'll nark you?" Jaime spoke confidently, without hesitation, only to be stared at intently by the three, their dangerous eyes stabbing into him threateningly. "But, I'll be out of your way," he said, getting up and walking away to his original, lonely, cafeteria bench.
That night he tossed and turned again, the covers were either too hot or he was too cold without them. And every time he closed his eyes, all he could think of was getting another fix - not sleep. so he kept them open and tried to envision June. Suddenly, she was hovering over him, and as he felt her warmth - he realized that it was not a dream.
"June?" He said, rising upward. She nodded her head and sat down next to him. Their legs dangled over the mattress. "How'd you get here?"
"I have my ways." she answered slyly with a devilish smile, as she batted her long eyelashes. "Did you know I was fifth in my class before I got sent here. fifth in my class!"
"I was just thinking about you." Jaime murmured, losing himself in her eyes, not totally hidden by the darkness.
"I couldn't get you out of my mind, Jaime." her voice was quiet, yet seductive and aggressive and she started to caress his chest and push down on him.
"June." he stuttered, "What are you doing?" His eyes wondered to the roommate that lay across the room from him.
"Oh, he'll enjoy this Jaime!" she giggled, lowering down on him even further, her nails digging into his skin. Then she brought her lips to his and they started to kiss - Jaime almost couldn't stop, but somehow he managed to pull away.
"June, you know we can't do this." his voice became louder and he stared at the ground, trying to avoid her eyes. June folded her arms angrily across her chest and shifted away from him. He looked back at her - she seemed hurt, her lips pouting and her eyes blankly staring ahead.
"I thought we had a connection," she said, almost about to cry.
"We do!" Jaime interjected, "But you know we can't do this here. maybe another time. We do have a connection, that's why I don't wanna do it like this." His voice became softer and he shifted towards her, putting his arm across her shoulder. "This is not like you."
"You don't even know me, Jaime. is this about the pool? I didn't mean to make you angry..." she replied, seemingly frustrated and surprisingly defensive - she didn't seem sympathetic, only regretful.
"Look. I think if we were together like this - that I'd be taking advantage of you. because this is not you, you're someone else right now - and I don't want to be the guy that takes advantage of the girl. I don't want to be that guy, June. okay?" His words were stiff and final. Her expression didn't change. "Look, June." he repeated, "I've known that guy - that guy is the person who stuck twenty dollar bills in my mom's panties when she danced at the bars, that guy was the person who beat her, the person who made her so crazy." he swallowed hard, his words fading as he continued. "you see? Please tell me you see? I don't wanna be that guy." He desperately hoped that unveiling some of his soul would win her over - but then he contemplated whether or not saying what he had said would accomplish the contrary. The two sat in silence and she slowly worked her way over to his side and she put his hand over his, gripping it tightly.
"I understand." she assured, noticing his genuine pain and longing for her. "So your mom." she said, "Do you wanna talk about her?"
"No," he answered quickly, yet calmly. He appeared to have forgotten the topic and he carefully tucked a curl behind her ear and caressed her cheek. "You know. you're beautiful. and today, I really did wanna jump in with you."
"That's the nicest think anybody's ever said to me." she whispered, with a slight laugh. "I've never met anyone like you before, Jaime. you fascinate me."
"Is that all I do?" He whimpered.
Madison Graves
MadisonGraves@yahoo.com
Chapter 2: Days of June
The next day Jaime rushed to group and met up with June a few minutes before the session started.
"You don't think there's a way to meet in another way, do you?" He whispered to her. A chill raced up her spine as she felt his breath caress and tickle her ear.
"We can't." she whispered back, "I'm surprised the counselors even let us have group together. They're very strict about avoiding boy girl relationships - I guess they want to create a laid back kind of environment."
"You see," Jaime retorted, "I'm not sure that I quite understand the logic in that - you're already dealing with people on the verge of suicide. and I'm not sure how anybody could live without you." She blushed and then laughed at him.
"You really are something!" June sighed, turning around as the session began. "I just wish the rest of the world felt the same way." She seemed as if she wasn't even talking to him anymore - Jaime didn't respond but nudged up closer to her. They will someday, he thought to himself. After the meeting, the two were greeted by the female counselor, who hastily pulled them aside. They both stood close to each other, nervous.
"Now," the counselor started, "the reason why we allow boys and girls to share these particular group sessions - is because it is the only truly supervised time - and we feel that it lightens frustrations when opposite sexes interact - or at least brings people, who would other wise ditch, to the group - but we don't intend for it to be a meeting place to develop romantic relationships. now, if you in fact have - I suggest you keep it at a limited view to others. or else you won't have a relationship at all." She raised her eyebrows seriously and then left the two standing side by side. When she left, the two rolled their eyes at each other, giggled, conversed on whether or not they had romance, and then dispersed.
It was a Saturday afternoon, Jaime knew because he had been keeping his own calendar - it frightened him to think that he could forget the days - he didn't pay attention to the adults that just never seemed to stop talking - he had to rely on himself. And on that day, for the first time, him and his fellow teens, at least the ones in his group session, would go out into the world - to the local swimming pool. All the counselors said how it was vital to let them "go outside and release some energy, as long as it was under proper supervision." Jaime had been dreading this day ever sense the trip was mentioned.
At nine in the morning, the teens gathered their things and piled onto a bus, excited to breathe fresh air that was far away from their prison-like sanctuary. Jaime didn't bother to borrow a suit, due to the fact that he didn't have one, because he didn't swim. However, a counselor practically forced him to. Swimming was one thing he did not do - and he wasn't planning on doing it in the near future. Finally, the bus made a jerky stop after fifteen minutes of jerky ride, and a gleam of hope sprinkled over him as he remember that he could see June's face - she was on the girl's bus. They lined up in the isles and hopped out of the bus, one by one, their eyes adjusting to the bright sun, which spilt off the pool house's roof and poured onto the tops of their heads. Jaime studied the crowd of faces for June - only to observe a circus of diverse personalities, some loudly talking, some very comfortable and anxious, and others solemn and almost scared - like him. But where was June?
Then he saw her. her dark hair contrasting with her somewhat pail, yet angelic, skin. She wore a short flowery top with frayed blue jeans complimenting her thin, light-skinned, bare stomach. "Jaime!" She squealed, racing over to him.
"June." he said. The two were inseparable - although her girlfriend's tried to pull her away. But he began to tense up as they neared the pool and everybody began undressing and edging towards the shallow, clear blue water. His mind became clouded with confusion - he didn't swim, but what if they made him? What about his scars, would people see? What if he couldn't handle being near the water? What if he freaked out? What would everybody think? He had to leave. so after telling June that he'd see her later he rushed to the nearest bathroom, only to have a counselor follow him.
"Jaime, where are you going?" The tall male counselor asked, grabbing Jaime's shoulder with his strong fingers.
"To the bathroom." he laughed, "what? You don't trust me to go and take a piss?" The counselor nodded his head and waited outside as Jaime entered the bathrooms - which looked as though they were built with millions of brown, black, and white pebbles. He instantly splashed some cold water on his face - sensing the irony of his action - and stared at himself in the mirror - his dark eyes, his soft features, predominant lips, and rugged hair - but pale and quivering - how was he going to handle this? After a few minutes, knowing he was being waited on, he hastily exited and tried to sit as far away from the pool - trying to blend in with the others who were also avoiding swimming. But then June spotted him, and he felt that oh so familiar heat overcome him and he blushed, gently rising from the chair that he was sitting on.
"Come on in, Jaime." she sighed, a huge smile revealing her dimples. She had already jumped in, her long hair even longer and even curlier and droplets of water forming around her bright eyes.
"I sun burn really badly, June." he explained, backing away.
"So don't take your shirt off," June sensed his insecurity.
"Besides I don't like to swim." He added, sitting back down. But she grabbed his arm tightly and urged him to jump in with her.
"Do you know how?" She asked. "Because I can teach you - we have a lake house. oh, I love to swim!"
"Yes, I've swam before - but I don't anymore." He suddenly became louder and more defiant - almost angry.
"Why not?" She giggled, pulling him closer to the water. She then jumped in, splashing him. "Please come in." she pouted her lips and then smiled, ducking underneath. He watched her blurred figure dive around underneath the surface, like a mermaid. And then as he glared deeper into the waves. his eyes became more distant and June noticed, climbing out of the waves that she had created. "Jaime?" she sighed, snapping in front of his eyes. He suddenly glanced up at her.
"I have to get out of here." he said, "It's not you." he stormed off and hid out until the trip ended, solemnly returning to the bus, without June - although she watched him the whole time, sympathetically.
During lunch the next day, Jaime made his way to a tough looking group at the center of the cafeteria. The three strangers glared over at him, implying that he wasn't welcome.
"Guys." he stated daringly, "I'm in need of something and I was wondering if you knew how to get it."
"No way," the leader chuckled, as though he had entertained this request quite a bit. He was a big guy with soft blue eyes and bold lips and he rested his elbows across the cold table. "There's no way to smuggle stuff in or get around the security to get out of here - people have tried it, only to get caught and sent to juvie. and if you think this place is bad, you just go to juvie and this place will be heaven."
"Just give in dude." another added, "the food really isn't that bad, and you'll be out of here soon enough." Jaime clenched his teeth together in frustration.
"You mean to tell me there aren't any connections inside?" He interrogated skeptically, his anger rising.
"Not that I know of." the leader replied, "and believe me if anybody knew it would be me."
"I don't believe you. What are you afraid of, that I'll nark you?" Jaime spoke confidently, without hesitation, only to be stared at intently by the three, their dangerous eyes stabbing into him threateningly. "But, I'll be out of your way," he said, getting up and walking away to his original, lonely, cafeteria bench.
That night he tossed and turned again, the covers were either too hot or he was too cold without them. And every time he closed his eyes, all he could think of was getting another fix - not sleep. so he kept them open and tried to envision June. Suddenly, she was hovering over him, and as he felt her warmth - he realized that it was not a dream.
"June?" He said, rising upward. She nodded her head and sat down next to him. Their legs dangled over the mattress. "How'd you get here?"
"I have my ways." she answered slyly with a devilish smile, as she batted her long eyelashes. "Did you know I was fifth in my class before I got sent here. fifth in my class!"
"I was just thinking about you." Jaime murmured, losing himself in her eyes, not totally hidden by the darkness.
"I couldn't get you out of my mind, Jaime." her voice was quiet, yet seductive and aggressive and she started to caress his chest and push down on him.
"June." he stuttered, "What are you doing?" His eyes wondered to the roommate that lay across the room from him.
"Oh, he'll enjoy this Jaime!" she giggled, lowering down on him even further, her nails digging into his skin. Then she brought her lips to his and they started to kiss - Jaime almost couldn't stop, but somehow he managed to pull away.
"June, you know we can't do this." his voice became louder and he stared at the ground, trying to avoid her eyes. June folded her arms angrily across her chest and shifted away from him. He looked back at her - she seemed hurt, her lips pouting and her eyes blankly staring ahead.
"I thought we had a connection," she said, almost about to cry.
"We do!" Jaime interjected, "But you know we can't do this here. maybe another time. We do have a connection, that's why I don't wanna do it like this." His voice became softer and he shifted towards her, putting his arm across her shoulder. "This is not like you."
"You don't even know me, Jaime. is this about the pool? I didn't mean to make you angry..." she replied, seemingly frustrated and surprisingly defensive - she didn't seem sympathetic, only regretful.
"Look. I think if we were together like this - that I'd be taking advantage of you. because this is not you, you're someone else right now - and I don't want to be the guy that takes advantage of the girl. I don't want to be that guy, June. okay?" His words were stiff and final. Her expression didn't change. "Look, June." he repeated, "I've known that guy - that guy is the person who stuck twenty dollar bills in my mom's panties when she danced at the bars, that guy was the person who beat her, the person who made her so crazy." he swallowed hard, his words fading as he continued. "you see? Please tell me you see? I don't wanna be that guy." He desperately hoped that unveiling some of his soul would win her over - but then he contemplated whether or not saying what he had said would accomplish the contrary. The two sat in silence and she slowly worked her way over to his side and she put his hand over his, gripping it tightly.
"I understand." she assured, noticing his genuine pain and longing for her. "So your mom." she said, "Do you wanna talk about her?"
"No," he answered quickly, yet calmly. He appeared to have forgotten the topic and he carefully tucked a curl behind her ear and caressed her cheek. "You know. you're beautiful. and today, I really did wanna jump in with you."
"That's the nicest think anybody's ever said to me." she whispered, with a slight laugh. "I've never met anyone like you before, Jaime. you fascinate me."
"Is that all I do?" He whimpered.
Madison Graves
MadisonGraves@yahoo.com