Britta could only shake her head in disbelief as Abed peered curiously over the pharmacy counter at his rows of options.
"So much for our one innocent. You're lucky I give such good advice, I've seen what you're in for and Troy's going to rock your world, but it's still weird to think about it. Pick that one," Britta amended quickly, pointing at a box of oddly-colored square packets. "Oh, and make sure you get one of those," she gestured at some small bottles that looked like the ones that the Dean sometimes swept hurriedly off his desk when people came into his office. Abed examined them.
"Oil or water based?"
"Water. And in case it goes well you should probably get two."
The cashier definitely raised an eyebrow when they brought the stuff up to pay, even more so when Abed turned out his empty pockets and Britta exasperatedly handed him money.
After Abed had walked out with the goods, Britta doubled back to the front of the shop, and in true Britta fashion took it upon herself to slam her hand on the counter and haughtily announce to the cashier,
"Yeah, you just saw that. A woman buying condoms and lube for her platonic male friend so he can go home and have sex with his boyfriend later. What's it to you buddy?" She turned and walked out with her head held high to join Abed, and seemed so pleased with herself that he chose to refrain from telling her that that hadn't been necessary. So much for any pretense of subtlety.