Author's Note: See, two chapters in one night. This one is quite long, so I hope you enjoy it!

It had been two hours since Beth had arrived, and it was all anyone could do to keep breathing. Roxanne Bojarski, Meg's best friend, had dropped by unexpectedly, and found herself in the middle of the mess. She felt awkward, being with them, but she thought she might feel worse if she were to leave. After all, she cared about JJ, too. She stared at the family, so quiet and in shock. Usually life at the Pryor's was non-stop chaos and fights over sweaters and television channels. That's why Roxanne spent most of her time there. She felt so unnerved, watching her best friend grapple with the pain of possibly losing her big brother forever.

The phone rang. Not a single member of the family made a move to answer it. Jack held Helen close, her face buried in his chest. He stared over her sculpted bouffant, focusing on something that no one else could see. Ring. Patty sat on the stairs, flinching as the tone pierced the eerie quiet. Ring. Will was clinging desperately to his sister. Ring. Next to the hall table sat Meg and Beth, JJ's "best girls." They both had the same faraway look in their eyes, although Meg was slightly more successful than Beth at hiding her tears.

Roxanne leaned against the door, taking it all in. The phone rang a fifth time, and she picked up.

"Hello, Pryor residence," she said with as much casual warmth as she could muster. She seemed to sigh with relief as the caller returned her hello. She gestured toward Meg. "Sure. I think she's available."

Meg gave Beth's hand a squeeze, standing up. Roxanne handed her the receiver. Drew, she mouthed.

"Hello?" Meg's voice sounded hoarse.

"Hey, Meg," replied Drew. His voice was bright, and Meg felt like the wind had been knocked out of her. She winced.

"Hi," she said quietly. Things in the Pryor house were tense enough. She didn't need her parents thinking that she was still seeing Drew. Not now.

She could see Drew's frown, even on the phone. "Hey, what's the matter? Why so gloomy?"

The room started to flow again around her. Jack led Helen and Beth to the kitchen, muttering something about coffee. Patty took Will into the living room, trying to escape the quiet with the television. Roxanne remained, still standing near the door. It seemed weird to Meg that even at a time like this, things could move with a certain normalcy. She felt numb.

"W-what?" Meg asked. Patty and Will were watching "Bonanza." A gun went off, and Meg braced herself against the wall.

"What's the matter? You don't sound so good."

Meg bit her lip. "I'm fine."

Roxanne stared at her feet, fingering the cigarette in her coat pocket.

"You're lying. You don't sound fine."

"Maybe," she admitted. "Look, Drew. About tonight, I-"

He cut her off. "Don't worry about it. The restaurant will still be there tomorrow."

"Tomorrow? I don't know if that's going to work." Tomorrow definitely wouldn't work .

"Meg? Look, this might not be the best time, but you definitely sound like you need someone to talk to. I can't get out of here tonight. I'm swamped. But you think you could swing down my way? I'm worried about you."

"You are?" Meg asked. She tried her best to sound genuinely curious. It wasn't working. Another shot went off in the living room. She could hear Beth's ragged breathing and her father whispering to her mother from the kitchen.

There was a pause. "Please, Meg. Just come on down. I want to see you."

"Okay... yeah."

It didn't seem like such a bad idea. She'd had enough of sitting and wondering for today. She heard a third bang! from the television.

"Yeah?"

Meg nodded.

"Meg?"

She half-giggled self-consciously. "Sorry. I'll be there."

"Good. I'll see you in a few, okay? Be careful."

"Yes. Bye."

Meg hung up the phone, and Roxanne looked at her expectantly.

"Well?"

"Can you give me a ride to Penn?"

Roxanne pulled her mother's keys from her coat pocket. "Not a problem."

*

By the time they were almost to Penn, Meg had decided that it definitely wasn't a good idea.

"He asked me what was wrong," said Meg quietly. "I don't know how to answer that question, Rox."

Roxanne shrugged. "Where am I parking?"

"We were supposed to go out tonight, but he told me just to meet him near the quad. He said it sounded like I needed to talk."

"Maybe you do," Roxanne said matter-of-factly, piloting her mother's beast into the student parking lot. "You haven't really had a chance to get any of it out of your system, Meg."

"I know. But I don't want to talk to Drew about this."

"Well, considering that you won't be doing much together for a while, I think the guy has a right to know."

Meg nodded. "I just don't know how he'll react."

Roxanne gave her a reassuring smile. "He wanted to know, Meg. All you're doing is giving him what he wants."

"I know, Rox, but he's so testy about Vietnam. And he doesn't like JJ. I'm not sure how this is going to work. I really don't want to make him mad."

"Look, if he gets mad, college guy or no college guy, he's not worth your time. Besides, JJ's more important than Drew any day," Roxanne countered. "If you need anything, I'll be in the car."

"Okay."

Roxanne flashed Meg another grin for encouragement as her friend crawled out of the passenger seat. Meg immediately saw Drew, sitting under the lamppost at the bottom of the steps. He was bent over a legal pad, and she could tell that he was deep in thought. He was scribbling furiously. Inwardly, Meg smiled. She loved watching Drew think. He was so passionate about everything. Unfortunately, he was incredibly passionate about his dislike for the conflict in Vietnam. And JJ. He had tried to be supportive, but Meg knew that it was difficult for him. He had constantly tried to convince her that JJ had made a mistake, and that she should tell him so, but to no avail. She took a deep breath as she approached him.

"Hi."

Drew looked up at her and gave her a small smile. "Just one sec. I have to finish this for the rally tomorrow."

Meg bit her lip. Great. Another rally. Just what she needed. She tried not to groan.

"So, high school," Drew greeted her affectionately, giving her a quick kiss. "Are you all right? You sounded pretty bad on the phone."

"Did I?"

Drew nodded. "Yep. What's wrong?"

Meg stared at the top button of his coat. "We got some news from JJ this afternoon."

"Oh," Drew said. She could tell that he was trying not to say anything to upset her.

"He's- well, he's not in Vietnam anymore," Meg managed.

Drew nodded. "That's good news, right?"

"Not exactly," Meg replied. She felt the familiar ache in the pit of her stomach. Every time she said the words, the more real they seemed. "He's at a military hospital in Japan. His squad was ambushed, or something. And he's... he's not doing well. They don't know if he'll last. "

"Oh, Meg." Reflexively, Drew pulled her close.

She shifted her eyes to her feet, trying to hide her tears. "I don't know what to do. Everything at home is a mess. I don't think we'll be seeing much of each other for a while."

Drew stared at her.

"I'm so scared. What if-- what if he doesn't make it, Drew?" Meg pressed. She clung to the collar of Drew's overcoat. "What if--"

"It was his choice, Meg," he replied plaintively. "He joined the Marines. He's the one who practically volunteered himself into Vietnam. He was selfish to set you up for worry. I'm sorry, but if anything happens to him, it's his own fault."

Meg let go of Drew's collar. This wa s a surprise. She looked up at him in shock. "What did you say?"

"I said it's his own fault. Anyone who would fight for a non-existent cause deserves the consequences."

"He's my brother, Drew."

"I know, Meg. I'm just saying that--"

"You don't know what you're talking about. You don't!" Meg insisted.

Drew looked at her doubtfully. "Look, Meg. I know that you want to believe that we're doing good over there, that your brother was doing good, but it's just not true. Killing innocent people under false pretenses is never good. It's murder. And that's what JJ was doing. I'm just not sure how to make you see that."

Meg's eyes widened. She felt her anger beginning to simmer and her chest begin to tighten. Drew couldn't talk that way about JJ. JJ wasn't a murderer. He didn't deserve to die.

"I do know what I'm talking about, high school," Drew continued. "I'm out here in the real world. And I want you to be too, Meg. It'll help if you know what's really going on over there."

"You don't! JJ's serving his country. He's risking his life for ungrateful people like you, who talk trash about the war and the government because they're too scared to do anything about it themselves."

Drew shot her a condescending and false look of comfort, as if she were a small child waking from a nightmare. "You know that isn't true. "

"It is, Drew," Meg said. She was on the brink of hysterics. "The whole time JJ's been gone, you've done nothing but tell me what a mistake he made. You don't do anything but talk, while thousands of men are over there, dying for freedom."

"What're you saying?"

"I'm saying that I think you're a- a coward!" Meg cried.

She rewarded Drew's stagnant expression with a slap across his face.

"You know, I thought I made the right choice. Deciding to date you," she continued. "But I guess not."

"I guess not, either. I should've known better than to take a chance on a high school girl," Drew put in, rubbing his cheek.

Meg felt a hand on her shoulder. It was Roxanne.

"Yeah. I guess it's hard to date someone who's so obviously out of your league. Come on, Meg," Roxanne said, grabbing Meg's hand. She pulled Meg to the parking lot, leaving Drew alone underneath the lamppost.