A/N: It's been a while. Major OOCness.
Chapter 2: Healing
NPOV
He stood in the expansive, dark tranquility of his kitchen; nibbling on a bar of chocolate. The digital clock on the stove glared the omniscient viridian numbers of 4:57 back to his jade orbs. She was due to be welcomed into his extensive, dim abode in 3 minutes.
The walls with which he lived in reflected him through every shade of color represented and every deliberately placed object of furniture. Grays, blacks, and whites predominantly occupied the hues of all of his furniture, while splashes of crimson, royal purple, gold, and occasionally forest green stood out from the rest. His decorative fashion was brightly reflected through the timeless artifacts that once belonged to the Persian aristocracy; each piece handpicked and more artistic than the last. He had put a lot of thought and patience into his loft for it to reach the artistic level it now exuded. However, most of all, tonight, it needed to be that much better.
He sauntered over to the open living room adjacent to the front door and sat on the plump obsidian couch. Allowing his arms to dangle between his ajar but tense legs while his elbows supported his torso upon his knees; he waited.
Two days prior, after having been given the assignment, he'd quietly written down his address and phone number on a piece of paper and slid it across the desk to her.
Flashback
"Friday, 5pm, and do not be late."
She gaped at him before hardening her resolve and glaring at the piece of paper, then their professor. She was a little spit fire, he'd give her that much. Hell, he could give her a lot more than that and he did not like it one bit.
He'd been drawn to her since that morning in the parking lot. Something about the pleasantly strange looking girl startled him into existence. He'd fully intended to start at this new college and finish as quickly as possible to obtain his medical degree; anything to defy the "business plan" that his father forced down his throat every time they spoke. But then she came in a flurry of profanities and…captivated him. He hated her for it. He'd never looked at a woman like he was trying desperately to stop doing now. His fingers had never fidgeted with the compulsive need to reach out and touch her somehow. She was no good for him; he could see that clearly. She had the power to make him do anything with a glance; it was something he wasn't used to doing. Not a feeling he openly welcomed. No matter how loud the bells in his head were going off to demand he switch his class, his subconscious allowed nothing of the sort. He stared at her for a few seconds while half and half of him debated. One side demanded that he would mentally and emotionally crush her to prevent damage to his one psyche, while the other side ached to cover her in an emotional blanket of love. Love... He needed to get away from her, quickly, to clear his thoughts.
He had come home and in a flurry of anxiety and rage, and stripped down to only a pair of tattered jeans. He would paint her out of his life and mind.
Hard, languid strokes of charcoal and pastels hit the canvas as rain assaulted the windows of his loft. A beautifully haunting memory she would become. Forever out of his system; he hoped. He worked well into the night and stopped only when dawn struck. He was emotionally exhausted and dropped to his knees in the middle of the havoc he'd created.
It was her. All of the vibrant art situated around him stared back with emerald eyes and petal pink hair. It was her. It would always be her whether he wanted it to be or not.
End Flashback
The viridian clock on the stove struck 5pm. He looked to the door and waited with anticipation.
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Porcelain fingers gripped the steering wheel tightly until her knuckles became a ghostly white. Fierce emerald eyes glared unseeingly out of the windshield of her car.
"Get a hold of yourself Haruno. He's just a dim-witted guy… Just another guy…"
She grabbed her bags from the passenger seat and swiftly exited her truck, making a beeline for the elevator of the car park she was in. Her finger jammed repeatedly at the up button until a 'ding' resounded throughout the quiet space around her, echoing off the walls.
"Creepy…" she mumbled.
She glanced down at the crinkled address on the piece of paper in her hand and pressed the button for floor 2. With a jolt, the machine ascended upwards, its old gears screeching with complaint to a halt.
"Very creepy." She mumbled once again while exiting the elevator. It was a single hall with one door at the end all the way to her left.
She stood in the middle of the hall, mulling over the thoughts that had been chaotically colliding with each other over the past 48 hours. He was within her thoughts all the time and it was insufferable. She didn't think she could put up an irritated and disinterested façade for very long within the presence of his home. She would be in one of the most intimate areas of his current life. How could she brush it off and act as if he didn't matter? He mattered. For the first time in Washington, something other than school mattered and it frightened her. She'd have to be acceptable for him. But hell she couldn't see herself changing back into her 'flamboyant ballerina' days for him…No…not since him. She'd be the best that she could without the fancy tricks and cadavers of her previous years. And by the gods, she hoped he accepted her.
She'd only just met him. Why was he impacting her so, and screwing up her thought patterns?
She huffed and began taking deliberate and staccato steps towards his door.
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He heard the footfalls of her heeled shoes on the floor and quickly crossed to the door waiting for her to knock.
She didn't.
He looked through the peephole and watched her for a few seconds as she took short laboring breaths and wrung her hands within one another. She was mumbling words he couldn't hear but nonetheless he liked the way her mouth was moving; her tongue.
He look away from the peephole and leaned his forehead against the dense wood. His lips slightly agape, eyes scrunched shut, fingers flexing against the wood of the door where her body would be. Maybe, he decided in that moment, just maybe he could indulge himself without her being aware. It would satisfy him and she'd never have to know. He wouldn't have to feel unrequited love once again.
Four short rapid knocks awakened him from his thoughts and his body retreated from the door as if it had been scorched. He slowly unlocked it, opening it with an unwavering gaze present on his face. She looked up into his face and all the confidence she'd been just trying to gather diminished. She was defenseless in his eyes, and he could feel it.
"H-Hi…" she lifted up her delicate hand in a small wave but dropped it when he didn't return the gesture.
"W-we…um…I-"she was nervously wracking her brain for words she didn't need to say. Why couldn't she form one coherent sentence? She was acting like an idiot. This wasn't her intention at all. He wasn't saying anything either…
"I-"she gestured back down the hall towards the elevator, "I think maybe I should just go?"
He quirked an eyebrow at her awkwardness and ran a hand through his shaggy red hair.
"I know why you're here, obviously." The baritone in his voice commanded her attention and she stared back doe eyed. Why was she acting like this?
He stepped back and opened the door wider for her to enter. After shuffling on her feet for a few seconds, she swiftly entered his loft and took a 360 turn to capture it all. It was a work of art and absolutely nothing she'd expected. He had taste…she adored men with taste.
He ever so quietly stalked up to her from behind, so close that he could bump into her if he so much as inhaled too deeply. He lightly inhaled her scent which sent his body into a disordered frenzy. Goosebumps prickled his skin while the hair at the nape of his neck stood on end. It took everything in him not to let a rather violent shiver wrack down his spine. If only he could just touch her…but that wasn't permitted in the decision he'd reached.
He sensed her about to say something, which probably wouldn't be of importance and retreated back to his rightful position a good 5 feet behind her.
"You know, I've actually always wanted to study abroad in history. Persian history always interested me." She said while turning around to look at him.
He looked at her before shifting his gaze to the dining room and taking swift long strides towards it.
"Okay…" she mumbled and followed in his footsteps.
"I researched a few topics already. I know what I want to do; you just need to approve it." It was the longest sentence she'd heard from him thus far.
She looked at the stacks of scattered paper around the dining room table and his forgotten computer with word documents open.
"Alright, well let's see what you found." She moved to sit in the chair directly next to him but he abruptly stood up. She stilled her movements and looked up at him dumbfounded.
"You look here…I'll just go over a few things online…over there." He mumbled the last part and moved quickly to the other side of the long table with his computer. He couldn't handle being that close to her unless he felt in control, and after that initial greeting, he was not in control at all.
He moved to the opposite side of the table and engrossed himself in his searches. She eyed him curiously from his abrupt reaction and he felt her stare boring into him from all angles. Wasn't she supposed to be doing something productive? He'd left her more than five minutes ago and yet she was still staring at him.
He was such a beautiful and distant creature. Not very often nowadays did a man stir up the carnal instincts threatening to pour out of every aperture of her body. His presence blanketed her and consumed her in his dark and restrained aura. She'd never experienced these feelings so profound. Not even with him. She wanted to get to know Gaara; from the inside out. To find out what makes him tick both the right way and the wrong way. She didn't want to be lonely anymore. She'd never been in a relationship; she just didn't have the heart after high school. Maybe he could be her first. Her first for a lot of things it seemed…
He was so distant, so cold, although the passion flaring dully in the background of his intense jade eyes was enough to make her weak. She was under his complete control with one disinterested glance. Here she was putting her fragile barely mended heart on the line for the same type of guy that made everything go wrong just a few short years ago. She desperately wanted him to prove her wrong. She was tired of feeling alone, sleeping alone, eating alone, being alone and letting her thoughts consumer her…
She shivered at her thoughts and took a furtive glance over in his direction. He looked very concentrated on something; one fist balled up next to his computer.
"So I think I like project 3. " Her quiet voice rang out through the silence around them, just above the pitter patter of the rain against the windows.
"Alright…I assume we'll have to meet weekly to finish this whole thing as soon as possible?" His eyes shifted about the room looking at random objects, anything other than her.
"Yeah. How about Wednesdays and Fridays?" she asked, desperately trying to meet his shifty gaze.
"Yeah, sure." He closed his laptop and began gathering the papers strewn about the table.
She tried helping, upon occasion slightly brushing his fingers with her delicate ones. There was only so much control he'd have until he snapped.
"Can you just-"She continued to scoop up the papers, although now intentionally brushing her hand against his. She didn't hear his soft whisper.
"Can you just stop! Just sit in the living room!" Gaara suddenly roared, throwing the papers in the middle of the table and furiously running his hands through his crimson locks, grabbing at the ends.
Sakura shook with the adrenaline coursing precariously through her veins. Why did he just scream at her? What did she do?
"But I was just-"
"Go."He uttered that one word while looking off to the side. His chest rising and falling rapidly although his demeanor gave off no other sign of his agitation. At least she thought it was agitation. In actuality it was his body trying to fight back against the control his head was now reigning over it.
She hardened her gaze and quickly began throwing things at random into her bag to leave. "Fine." She grabbed her belongings and stormed towards the door, stopping herself short when she reached the handle.
He didn't want her to be upset with him, but didn't she see what she was doing to him? There was only so much his fragile soul can handle. He didn't know how to make it up to her because apologies weren't his thing. Crap, he'd messed up.
She looked at where he was standing in the waning light of the afternoon, a perplexed and crest fallen look upon his face. She'd forgiven him the moment she began walking towards the door. She would give him a thousand more chances with just a glance from those intense jade orbs.
"I'll see you Friday Gaara…" His head quickly snapped up and jade met vibrant emerald. If she hadn't been mistaken, the beginnings of a smirk started twitching on the left side of his mouth. She wanted to walk over and trace his unique masculine features…but he didn't seem to like touching very much.
He watched her leave and listened to about 5 clicks of her heels and the elevator's prominent 'ding' before he rushed to the door and grabbed his keys. Why he was following her home, he didn't know, but he just couldn't leave her yet. This big open space became too lonely at times.
Sakura darted out of the elevator and into the desolate car park, heading straight for her car. She saw a lone figure hastily making their way through the garage also, a flash of red capturing her attention.
Is that…?... No..No.
She got to her truck and unlocked it, hoisting herself into the large machine. It was only a short 10 minute drive back to her home. Thankfully a lot closer than that hell hole of a college. She picked up herself phone and dialed an all too familiar number.
"My lovely Koi-chan!" a hefty baritone rang from the other end upon answering.
She laughed and turned onto the main road. "Why do you insist on calling me that?"
"Because I love you of course, unless you're cheating on me, I won't stop. And I know you're not." He started laughing but soon stopped when she didn't join him. She worried her bottom lip and made a slight cough into the receiver.
"Sakura…" she cringed at his commanding tone.
"What?"
"Who is he?"
"Who's who?" she pretended to not understand his question.
"I'm not going to ask you again." His voice left no room for discussion.
"He's just this guy."She waved her hand in a dismissive motion while turning down her block.
"But wha-"
"-Oh well what do you know, I'm pulling into my driveway. I'll talk to you later Kakashi! Love you!" She closed her cell phone as quickly as possible, frowning down at it as she thought over the small conversation.
That man…
She sighed while gathering her things, and literally hopping down from her large truck, nearly breaking her ankle in the stumble that followed.
Grumbling all the way to the door, she hastily unlocked it and threw her belongings down on the floor. She was going to go make a nice dinner and wallow in her thoughts with a glass of white wine. Perfect night. She rounded the corner to her kitchen but immediately backed up until she ran into the wall behind her, hand against her racing heart, eyes wide as saucers.
"Sakura, you know this wasn't the greeting I was quite expecting." A throaty chuckled resounded throughout the kitchen at their own words.
She squeezed at her heart to stop the fast pace and a large smile began to creep across her features.
"Kakashi!"
He darted into the significantly vacant garage right after her and made a beeline for his black sports car parked on the other side. She looked at him, but he quickly turned away, quickening his pace further. He ducked into his car and started it as he waited for her to reverse out of her parking space.
Why are you doing this Sabaku…
She reversed and began heading to the entrance of the garage, cell phone in hand. He followed her all the way home, watching as her head occasionally shook from side to side and how her hands sometimes flailed in the air at the conversation he could only guess she was having.
She pulled up to her house and sat in her truck for a minute longer before she hopped out and…nearly busted her ass. A small smile etched its way across his features at her almost potentially harmful spill. He watched as she entered the house and could see her through the clear window in her dining room. She walked into the room but immediately became frightened. What the hell was going on? Now there was a shirtless unknown man approaching her…and she was smiling back at him?
The anger that began coursing through his body made the hackles on the back of his neck stand up. What was a half naked man doing in her house making her eyes light up the way they did? Was she… Was she involved with someone?… Why hadn't she told him? Did he ever give her reason to? Did he ever give her reason to think he cared in general? He never wanted to.
He looked back at the window and watched as the silver haired man peppered kisses all over her face. It should have been him. It should have been his mouth. He should be the one making her look so happy.
Furiously, he began searching for something, anything that would allow him to do what he had planned. He was going to stop this and permanently set his foot in her life somehow.
He unbuckled his seat belt and began barreling towards her front door, ripping his hood off. Three brisling knocks faded into the cooling evening air as he waited for her to answer. Loud stomps of two pairs of feet could be heard along with giggling. Her laughter.
"Sa-Ku-Ra, you were expecting company my koi?" Gaara desperately wanted to snap this man's neck.
"What? No, no, I don't know who this could b- Kakashi stop it! Stop! It tickles!" He could hear her laughing again while he began to start seeing red.
He knocked again and again until she pulled open the door and stared at him with a shocked expression on her face…the silver haired man draped behind her, leaning against the door frame.
"Gaara? What are you doing here? How did you know where I-"
"-I brought you this." He held up a small pink Hello Kitty pen in his hand.
She looked down at it, quirking her eyebrow and cocking a hip. Kakashi looked from the small pen to the unknown red head, back to the pen. Was he serious?
"Are you really-"
"-You left it? At my house when you left in a hurry. I figured you'd want it since you seemed to like it." He threw an intimidating and smug smirk in Kakashi's direction when he mentioned her being at his house.
"Oh, well," she grabbed the pen from his hand, "Um…thank you?"
He gave a curt nod and continued to stare at Kakashi. She watched the two men conduct a staring contest and rolled her eyes.
"Who are you?" Gaara asked in a stern voice.
"I could ask you the same." Kakashi matched his tone.
Sakura gave a frustrated growl that had both men looking at her in question. "Kakashi will you just go wait in the living room, please?" Sharp emerald eyes met guilty charcoal.
He sighed, "Alright, alright." He kissed her on the top of her head like a loving father, "Don't you hurt her." He shot an intimidating look to Gaara before retreating to the living room as instructed.
Sakura stepped outside onto the porch and looked up at Gaara, pen in hand. "So you came here fo-"
"-Who was that?" Was he ever going to stop interrupting her?
She looked up into his captivating eyes and found herself telling him things she really shouldn't be sharing with a complete stranger. "His name is Kakashi, obviously. He's a very very close friend of mine from when I lived in Japan. He lives in Canada now…I don't know why…"
"Don't bash Canadians!" Was heard from inside the house.
Sakura turned and smiled towards the door before turning back to Gaara, "He um…He helped me through a period of mine when I had…for better lack of words, mentally checked out. Sanity wise that is."
She looked off to the side as Gaara quirked and eyebrow at her statement. "There was this guy…this guy way back in high school. I-"She paused and inhaled slowly, "I loved him."
Gaara visibly flinched at her words.
"At least I thought I did. I was just a stupid teenager caught up in obsession…And he broke me. He broke me from the inside out." She looked down and a curtain of petal pink folded across her features before she looked back up, stronger than before. "Kakashi was my English teacher. He saw me crying in his classroom and he fixed me. He's been one of the closest people to me ever since. He's like my other half I guess." She laughed at her own statement.
He wanted to be her other half.
"Don't mind the gestures either. He's just a very affectionate man."
Gaara gave a curt nod and stuffed his fist in his pocket. They stood there for a couple more minutes listening to the growing sounds of the night as the cool air set in.
"I think I'm going to go-"
"-Do you want to maybe go out for tea? I love green tea. Maybe at the smalle coffee shop in town?" She was the one to interrupt him this time.
He looked shocked at her offer and began warring with himself in his head. He wasn't supposed to be allowing himself to spend time with her. Follow her around. To even be around her period. But he was tired….so tired of not letting himself feel for the sake of trying to be protected. He desperately wanted to have her be his Kakashi; affectionate gestures and so much more involved. It was the first time he'd ever felt like this and it was consuming him whole. No more barriers, no more rules, he was going to try everything in his power now, and she would be his. It was going to be hard to try and change 20 years of living so quickly but he'd try, for her.
"Yes. Yes, I want to." He stared intently into her face, into her eyes. She noticed something there that wasn't there before. Something had changed within him in a few short seconds.
"Okay…just let me get my bag and shoes and I'll be right out." He looked down to her bootless feet wiggling in the cool air and let out a breathy chuckle. She already had him laughing. He hadn't felt like this in years. He wasn't going to let her go, whether she knew it or not.
She smiled sweetly at him and disappeared into the house to retrieve her belongings.
He walked to the steps of her porch and sat down, mulling over his thoughts as hefty puffs of smoke escaped his mouth in every breath. A real smile began tracing his features and he let his head hang as he stared down at his faded converse. Inklings of happiness traced and ebbed at the edges of his heart and soul. He was healing. Finally learning how to heal.
Thank you for reading. Review please.