Incredibly Incredulous
Chapter 2
Natural Disaster
"So..." Zhang Fei said thoughtfully. "You're sure that hot chick is really the same kid you made with Pang Tong?"
Yue Ying shuffled uncomfortably. "Why wouldn't she be?"
"No offense, but two wrongs don't make a right. " Zhang Fei replied. "You've got that homely, spank me school marm thing going for you but it's not enough to compensate for his ugly. Sure as shit isn't a mermaid swimming around in either of your gene pools so how did you two luck out?"
"Don't insult my wife." Zhuge Liang growled.
"Tread carefully Yide." Guan Yu warned.
"What?" Zhang Fei asked as they all glared at him. "You're all thinking it. Yue Ying plus Pang Tong does not make anything we would want to look at twice more or less drool over. It's...well incredibly incredulous is what it is."
Guan Yu hid his smile as the strategist threw his fan down and stormed off. "Now you've done it."
Yue Ying picked at her breakfast not really wanting to chase after her husband. Last night's silence had been awkward enough. "Maybe I should go talk with Pang Tong."
"Yeah, ask for proof she's really yours." Zhang Fei nodded in approval. "Go to the conservatory and ask those guys. They should tell you the sun, moon and stars all aligned the night you two hooked up and there was some miracle that fell out of the sky and into your bed."
"Ugh." Guan Yu looked around. It was amazing how he could keep digging himself into a hole. "I need reinforcements."
"What's with his mask anyway? Is he a leper or something? Or got some sort of disease? Is ugly infectious?" Fei asked. "Bet you kept the lights off with him. Might have needed a blindfold and some reverse cowgirl action too."
Guan Yu finally smacked him. "Just because she's a soldier doesn't mean you can talk to her like that."
"We're good, right?" Zhang Fei asked and wiped some breakfast off his beard.
Yue Ying gave him a weak smile. "Actually I think you've given me the required inspiration to go have a long overdue conversation."
"See. I'm inspirational."Zhang Fei responded and smacked his brother back.
"You're impossible." He corrected him and watched the young woman walk away to find her weapon and a horse.
"I just sent two strategists running with a mere conversation. I'm incredible."
"Incredibly incredulous." Guan Yu mumbled as his brother's smile broadened as his new phrase was used in conversation.
"Damn right."
Pang Tong looked up from the ginseng plants he was carefully rinsing and eyed the intruder. "I was wondering when you'd show up. Sorry that we really don't do breakfast."
"Is she really our daughter?" Yue Ying had to ask as she laid her eyes on the pretty face still nestled in her blankets. Zhang Fei was right. How did they produce something so beautiful?
"Amazing isn't it?" Pang Tong smiled. "Good thing everyone wants prepubescent girls who like to sing and dance or I'd have all kinds of men chasing after her."
"She got Zhao Yun's attention." Yue Ying reminded him. "Something a girl of her age should be a little happier about."
"Doubt she's interested in a lifetime membership to the Zhao Yun fan-girl club, but if that's the gift you brought don't be surprised if she sells it for twice what you paid."
"She's really our daughter?" Yue Ying repeated and cautiously sat down. This was as close as they had been since the night they had made her. A night she had tried so hard to forget as it was the most vulnerable and weak she had ever been. She hurt her husband and violated their wedding bed with her foolish need to be desired.
"Unless your husband switched out babies on his way from your bed to his door." Pang Tong shrugged. He wasn't really in the mood to play "Remember When" with his daughter pretending to be asleep behind them.
"I tried to pretend that what we did never happened." Yue Ying struggled with the words as his eyes narrowed at her.
"Look, this was just an unfortunate coincidence that we ran into each other again." Pang Tong shrugged. "Let's just leave it at that."
"You can do that?"
He looked over his shoulder as Fei Yan 'slept' next to the fire. "What do you want, Yue Ying?"
"I just want…" She bit her lip. "I want to know who my daughter is."
"She's my daughter, always has been." He shook his head. "Better to hear that from me, than her."
"Do you want to hear that from me?" Fei Yan asked and rubbed her weary eyes as she sat up and finally looked at her mother. "Do you want to hear that I don't want to know you? Or did you come here to try and explain yourself to me?"
"I…don't know." Yue Ying sat down and clasped her hands. "I just felt obligated to come here and try to convince you to join Shu. I can see you're both accustomed to this existence, but I know you want more Shiyuan. You always have. Why pass up this opportunity to show up Kongming like you've always wanted?"
"Is that what you want?" Tong asked. "You know better than to say things like that to a strategist, we're easily seduced by the temptation of a battle of whits."
"I want Shu to succeed and I honestly don't care what your motives are. I selfishly want to have a chance to get to know you, Fei Yan, however this isn't about any of us. It's about the future of this country. I love Kongming and I doubt you can come close to outsmarting him, but I also know you're a different kind of strategist. I know you like to take risks and always lean towards the more aggressive tactics. Your different styles would lead to a more complete strategy team and perhaps help us overcome the odds against us."
"Tactician Yin and Yang?" Pang Tong chuckled. "Does your husband know you're out here talking dirty to me?"
"I'm going back to bed." Fei Yan mumbled and went back over to the campsite and covered herself in a blanket again. "I don't need to hear my mother talk about my Dad's 'aggressive tactics' or gambling with outdated herbal remedy."
"Do it for her, Shiyuan." Yue Ying said quietly. "Don't try and tell me you're happy selling Ginseng and living off the land when your little girl is dressed in rags and you're no better. Join our army and give her a better life."
Pang Tong watched her leave and wandered over to the fire. "I think she's right. You do deserve better than what I can provide."
"You're a sucker." Fei Yan frowned. "She's preying on your weakness."
"Yup." He nodded. "However, it's something I've been thinking on a lot recently. You need to be a normal teenager, get out into the world and socialize like one."
"I don't like people." She said and rolled over on her back to look at the rising sun. "That's not going to change."
"Although I appreciate you hating the world for not treating me well, I do think you should at least give it a chance." Tong poked the fire.
"Why? We're both judged purely on our looks. You should be happy people actually look you in the eye."
"Maybe it won't be so bad when I can afford to buy you real clothes."
"So you've already made up your mind?" She said simply.
"You hardly made it worthwhile debate." He chided. "You're going to have to do better than that to win against Kongming."
"I think my presence alone will be a victory." She sighed. "I also think that Xing Cai girl is pretty cute and I'm not sure if it's because I like her outfit or I want to kiss her."
"Yeah, I think we're long overdue for getting you properly socialized."
Liu Bei's eyes glistened with excitement and he didn't notice the crane feathers floating to the floor as Zhuge Liang plucked more feathers from his fan in frustration. "Master Pang, I am honored that you have reconsidered and are going to accept my offer!"
Pang Tong watched the feathers float to the ground and then looked up at Zhuge Liang and had second thoughts. This wasn't about egos, he didn't really want the job that much and he did owe the man a chance to veto the decision. "Well Buddy, I think it's all going to have to depend on whether or not your existing strategist wants me on his team. Considering our history, I'm sure you'll agree that the decision should lie with him."
Zhuge Liang set his fan down to avoid doing more damage to it as his Lord looked at him with pleading eyes. He forgot how easily his old friend could spin his words so that the suggestion sounded like it was someone else's idea. He could see that Liu Bei was on the verge of saying something about virtue and he had to quickly make a decision. Should he be selfish and dismiss Pang Tong to avoid dealing with his now public personal problems? He knew releasing the free officer would eventually allow him to wander his way into Cao Cao's service since Sun Quan had already shot him down. Did he really want to see what the enemy could do with his friend's often brash and aggressive tactics? His stress level was reduced as his mind quickly ran through the scenarios.
"Master Zhuge, " Liu Bei didn't want to sound like he was begging, but it had helped him get this far n life so why change now? "I beg of you to consider employing Master Pang. His service would greatly help us on our quest to restore the Han but as a man of virtue I can not force you to work beside a man who has betrayed your trust."
Zhuge Liang kept his eyes on Pang Tong and they exchanged glances that only two men of vast intelligence could. He could feel Liu Bei's puppy dog eyes on him, begging for this chance to employ yet another individual they could barely pay. "Confucius said that it is more shameful to distrust our friends than to be deceived by them. I am sure that we can set aside our differences for the greater good of restoring the Han and bringing peace and prosperity back to this land."
"Sure can." Pang Tong chirped and smiled without breaking eye contact. Of course mending their broken friendship would be easy in comparison to winning the war, restoring the Han and bringing about World peace. He finally had to look away as Liu Bei approached and he wondered if the man was going to hug him.
"I made you and your daughter some sandals." Liu Bei offered the woven grass sandals as a token of his appreciation.
"Thanks Buddy!" He wondered if this was really the best gift basket the Shu lord could afford. Not exactly the best start to inspiring confidence in a win if your hand outs were hand made by your king from free materials he found on the side of the road.
"Than you Master Pang." Liu Bei smiled. Finally things were going so well! He couldn't wait to get to Wu! "Sima Hui said that any man who obtains the help of the Sleeping Dragon of the Young Phoenix will restore the empire. Now that I have both of you, the Han will surely be restored!"
"Thanks for the job, Kongming." He winked.
Zhuge Liang gave him a weak smile. Was he really going to be able to make this work?
"What does the tourist pamphlet say about the observatory?" Zhang Fei asked.
"Discover your lifespan! Find out if lost relatives or dead or alive! Update your officer Biography! Predict natural disasters! Find out if that's really your kid! All for low low prices..." Zhang Bao read and looked up at his father as he smacked his hand on the table.
"Natural disaster. How much does that cost?"
"I'm pretty sure it's for earthquakes, floods and famine not a way of unveiling one of Zhou Yu's schemes." Guan Yu informed him.
"Right!" Zhang Fei jumped up and nudged his son's arm. "Go get the horses and lets go sightseeing."
"So you're the great, all powerful Zhao Yun." Fei Yan circled him as if she was appraising a cattle for slaughter.
He watched her and smiled. "Yes."
She looked over at a nearby herd of fan-girls swooning and salivating. "Why exactly is it that you're in the market looking for women when you have those girls ready to service you at a moments notice?"
"Fan-girls are...a different kind of monster." He replied and she looked up at him with curious eyes.
"So you're more into teenage girls? How old are you again?"
"28...and you look a lot older than you are."
"You look younger. I'm not really attracted to you. I'm told I should be because you're some sort of sex symbol and superhero but I'm not really impressed."
"I have to admit, I don't hear that every day."
"Hey, kid! Quit talking dirty to him and come over here!" Zhang Fei hollered and waved at her.
She thought about that and looked up at Zhao Yun. "Maybe if you talked dirty to me...like a strategist. Can you do that?"
He had to smile. "Maybe when you're a little older I'll let you lure me into a debate."
"Now I'm intrigued." She said hopefully. "You really have a decent debate skillset?"
"Why are you trying so hard to like me?" He queried.
"I'm trying to figure out if there's something wrong with me...or you." She frowned and wondered if she was going to end up with some ugly strategist who could only arouse her with his brain. "Well I have to go look for my Nipples on the outskirts of town when this day is over, maybe you'd like to come help?"
"With as much trouble as you seem to be having keeping your Nipples contained, I would have thought you'd have found a way to tie it up already." He countered and watched her eyes light up with mischief.
"Nipples should be left loose to enjoy freedom so the milk tastes better." She watched him crack a smile and moved in for the final blow. "Want to taste the free range milk from my Nipples?"
"HEY!" Zhang Fei hollered and rattled some windows. "Pang Titties! Get over here, we don't have all day!"
"Someone is going to have to teach that man manners." Fei Yan turned and looked at the man. His son was beside him chuckling while his daughter his her embarrassment behind her hand.
"Says the girl who decimated a town's innocence by talking about her Nipples in public yesterday." Zhao Yun looked over and noticed two of his young pupils were apparently skipping practice today to go on an adventure with their boisterous father. "Try to behave yourself in town, the infirmary doesn't need any more heart attack victims."
She pouted. Just as she was starting to enjoy herself. "I'm not supposed to talk to strangers or let them lure me into family adventures."
"I will let your father know where you are. Zhang Fei is not a stranger anymore, he's a superior officer and unfortunately he will only get more vulgar the longer you ignore him." Zhao Yun turned to go back to the camp where he was hoping the Guan children would be already working on morning drill.
Fei Yan wandered over to the small group and looked at Zhang Fei. "Did you want something?"
"We're heading to the observatory, wanna come?" Zhang Fei replied.
"You do realize it's not a place where you go to observe anything? It's not a peep show." She replied as they prepared to go sightseeing.
"Yeah, but it's where we're going to find out if you're really who you think you are. They offer parentage verification. I have to know, it's just to crazy to think you came out of that union and very possible this is some ploy to create tensions in our camp." Zhang Fei announced his grand plan and sat up in the saddle and belched.
Fei Yan looked to Xing Cai. "You are too pretty to be your father's daughter. Does anyone question that? "
"Well...no...I never had anyone question..." Xing Cai looked to her father and brother for support but they were both in the saddle already laughing about something.
"Well then I suppose two can play at this game. Let the observations commence." Fei Yan climbed into the saddle of the extra horse and waited for the sightseeing tour to begin.
"Maybe that's not such a good idea." Xing Cai didn't really like the vibe she was getting.
"Why? Some dirty laundry the Zhang family doesn't want aired? Perhaps that braggart father of yours should consider who he's tangling with when he continually calls my father ugly and a liar." Fei Yan replied and set the Wonderstick on her lap as she adjusted the stirrups.
Xing Cai raised her eyebrows and raised her voice. "Father, I don't think we have time for this."
"Of course we do!" Zhang Fei hollered back. "We can't have our master strategist all worked up if it turns out this little girl is a fake! I mean come on, Zhou Yu is more than capable of this! Nothing is coincidence, just weird how we stumbled across them in the marketplace when we were looking for officers. Of all the places in China, that is were these hermits come out of the woods to sell their herbs and porn."
"Hehehe. Pang Titties." Zhang Bao chuckled some more.
Fei Yan smiled and cracked her knuckles. "So let's get to know each other a little, huh? Since we're going to be staying and apparently included in family outings."
"Yes indeed, this young woman is the child of Pang Tong and Huang Yue Ying." The resident sage replied.
"Awwww..." Zhang Fei frowned. "How the hell is that possible? You guys sell charms or items with a plus 5000 luck option?"
"Well I showed you mine..." Fei Yan threw some change at the man. "Now it's time to show me yours."
"This.." The sage replied frustrated. "Is NOT a peep show."
"I want to know about Zhang Xing Cai. I think she's too cute to be his kid." Fei Yan informed the man and counted her change from her morning's LobsterThong sales. Oh well, it was only money and this was well worth it.
"Very well."
"Wait. This isn't about my family, it's about your sketchy background!" Zhang Fei snorted, annoyed that she'd imply that his baby girl wasn't his.
"Daughter of Zhang Fei and Xiahou Lou An." Came the reply.
"Xiahou?" Fei Yan asked. "Not really a name you hear associated with Shu, show me hers. Who is Xiahou Luo An?"
Fei's eyes got wide as the change flew into the sages hands. "Wait..."
"Daughter of Xiahou Dun and Gongsun Lian."
"How exactly did you manage that?" Fei Yan asked somewhat surprised. "How much does an officer biography cost me?"
"None of your business." He growled and balled his fist at the sage to try and keep him from executing the request for information.
"Xiahou Luo An..." came the reply from the opposite corner of the Observatory as a clerk opened up the "Generals of the North" book. "Daughter of Xiahou Dun and warlord Gongsun Zan's daughter, Lian. At age 13 she was out collecting firewood when Zhang Fei passed by, declared her "good enough to breed" and took her to be his wife. Her cousin Xiahou Ba tried to deter the kidnapping, but Zhang Fei prevailed and took the girl home."
"I never said that! I said "Of good breeding!"" Zhang Fei bellowed and went over to 'correct' the clerk with his fist.
"Well, once again we prove that you just can't make this stuff up. The truth is sometimes way too interesting." Fei Yan turned to Xing Cai and looked at her again. Yes she was cute and clearly she got it from her mother's side of the family.
"Hey kiddo, what did you do today?" Pang Tong looked up as his daughter finally returned.
"General Zhang took me to the observatory." Fei Yan said and noticed Guan Yu's eyebrows rise.
"He knows it's not a peep show, right?" Pang Tong asked.
"He does now." She chuckled and took off her new sandals. They were beginning to blister her feet.
Pang Tong frowned. "What did you do?"
"I found out that Xing Cai is Xiahou Dun's granddaughter. " She looked over at Guan Yu who was still quiet.
"Well that explains your attraction to her then." Tong mused. "You always did like that eyeball story too much."
"You have to admit it's better than saving babies." She stretched her shoulders and then added. "Though I guess if Xiahou Ba had better training he could have saved his 13 year old cousin from being molested by a random pervert wandering the countryside looking for breeding stock."
"Which brings up the question as to why you sexually harassed Zhao Yun this morning? Seriously kid, one day and you're already piling on the complaints." Pang Tong quickly redirected the conversation away from damaging information about Guan Yu's oath brother.
"Complaints?" She asked. "As in plural?"
"Glad my grammar lessons were effectual." Tong tapped his fingers on the table. "Three soldiers were almost circumcised by crustacean."
"Well...maybe I need to re-market the LobsterThong as a weapon not a defensive package."
"Then there is the Prince Liu Shan who put his lobster in his pants and was almost castrated." He frowned. "I'm probably going to be fired before I finish my first day."
Guan Yu cleared his throat. "As our Lord is taking care of the Prince at the moment, I'm here to make sure we keep Shu safe from you young lady."
"Me?" She asked innocently. "Perhaps a healthy dose of manners and common sense needs to be handed out with all the free rations."
"As punishment you're going to do my paperwork tonight and you better forge my handwriting perfectly or you're going to have to rewrite all of it." Tong closed his notebook and gathered the stack of complaints that had been filed against his daughter in one simple work day.
"You are going to be remanded to Zhao Yun's custody while we recover from the destruction or your arrival." Guan Yu informed her.
"Clearly that 'complaint' was more of a 'request' to be sexually harassed." Fei Yan clarified.
"Clearly we're going to have one of those awkward parenting talks tonight while you do my homework." Pang Tong countered.
"I told you I didn't want to come here."
"And it's painfully apparent that this was long overdue." Tong sighed and patted her head. "Sorry kiddo, I can't blame you for my bad parenting."
"Dad..."
"Well I'm off to see what kind of apology I can come up with for almost turning our Prince into a eunuch."
Fei Yan frowned as he shuffled off mumbling to himself.
"So the rumors have to be true then..." Fei Yan looked up at Zhao Yun. "Liu Shan was dropped on his head as a baby."
Zhao Yun grabbed her notepad and looked at her drawing. "I think you might need some medication."
"Really, why else would a person put a live unbanded lobster in their pants? It's because of idiots like him that I have to write up warning labels! That just...detracts from the fashion-ability of the LobsterThong."
"What is this?" He turned her notebook around and showed her her drawing.
"You. "Schooling" a female student. Fan-girls love this side of you."
Zhao Yun knelt down on one knee and handed her her notepad. "Fei Yan, if you're going to be part of this training class I'm going to have to insist you quit drawing porn and get out on the field with the other young officers and start sparring. I think we're all very well aware of how destructive you can be with your pen and mind. Grab your staff, and go spar with Guan Ping and please refrain from talking about Nipples of any variety while you're out there."
"How about you spar with him and I take Xing Cai?" She asked and batted her eyelashes. "Though no promises that I won't mention Nipples."
"I don't think it would be a bad idea for you to make a friend in her...however I think you're more than capable of making anything a bad idea."
"Just yesterday you were ready to hit on me in the market, now I'm too dangerous to practice fighting with a skilled warrior carrying a trident?"
"Yesterday, you were not an officer of Shu under my tutelage."
"So...you babysit and run the juvenile correctional facility. " She smirked. "Either you're a saint or a pedophile."
"Go train."
"When exactly did I sign up to be an officer of Shu?"
He sighed. Strategists. "Go train or I will burn that notebook and all those commissions you're working on will go to waste. Don't think I haven't noticed you selling your sketches."
"You're leaving money on the table." Fei Yan stood and grabbed her notebook back. "Those fan-girls follow you everywhere and are willing to spend money on anything that has to do with you. I'm willing to be your agent."
"What exactly is it you're trying to do?" He asked. "Your father looked stressed enough when he was apologizing to Liu Bei for whatever it was that happened to Liu Shan. This morning he was already burdened with several complaints when I went in to talk to him about you. This is hardly the best way to start your first day in Shu."
"Alright, I guess you are kinda cute when you're trying to be inspirational." She stood up and stretched then reached for her Wonderstick.
He sighed. And he thought the Guan children gave him a headache.
"Shiyuan." Zhuge Liang acknowledged the man and sat down across from him.
"Here to congratulate me on my father of the year award?' Pang Tong asked and ran his hands through his hair. Was this day ever going to end?
"Quite the first day."Zhuge Liang said quietly, wanting to forget all their issues and just go back to being the friends they once were. Unfortunately that wasn't possible.
"Is this some sort of truce?" Pang Tong sat back and looked at him, noting the softness in the man's voice.
"An attempt to make things somewhat tolerable between us. As much as will be allowed." Zhuge Liang said
"I'm not after your wife, Kongming." Pang Tong assured him.
"I know you're not."
"Yesterday I thought I was a pretty good Dad, today...no so much." Pang Tong looked at the stack of complaints again. He hated paperwork. "So, are you here to fire me?"
"No..actually I was here to commend your daughter's entrepreneurial spirit." Liang handed him a ledger. "Zhao Yun has appealed to our lord on her behalf stating she has increased our profitability with her...um...artwork. Profits that outweigh the costs of tending to the casualties of her invention."
"Why would he do that? " Tong wondered if the valiant Shu warrior was actually lobbying for more than just a new student.
"He seems to like a challenge."
Pang Tong narrowed his eyes at the man. "As in a student or perhaps the one girl who hasn't died of a nosebleed as soon as she looked at him?"
"Speaking of bloody noses," Zhuge Liang sighed. "Why is it that I had to go smooth things over with the sages at the Conservatory because Zhang Fei broke a man's nose on a field trip that included your daughter?"
"I wasn't aware that strategist doubled as public relations specialist around here."
"We are short handed and underfunded." Zhuge Liang finally let loose a sigh. "However there is no shortage of immature antics and outbursts. Liu Bei has a bleeding heart and Zhang Fei has diarreha of the mouth. While one tries to bankrupt us, the other tries to corrupt the masses."
"Well Guan Yu and Zhao Yun seem pretty harmless."
"The God of War has fanboys in very powerful warlords and Zhao Yun has fan-girls in a very powerful army of estrogen and yaoi. Each their own headache...then you add their children who are just as bad."
"Guess I should have read the job description a bit better." Pang Tong replied.
"Welcome to Shu."
xxxxxxxxxxxx
"So buddy, what's this I hear about you paying a little too much attention to my baby girl?" Pang Tong tapped his staff on the table as menacingly as he could for being an exhausted tactician with a headache and a hand cramp.
Zhao Yun looked up from his late dinner as the strategist sat down. "She's very hard to keep up with. One minute she tells me I'm cute and the next she's pinned Xing Cai to the ground and is kissing her. "
"Oh." Tong leaned his staff against the table. "Guess she's making up for lost time. So for the record you are, or are not interested in my daughter? The goat is negotiable if you're into that sort of thing."
Zhao Yun chuckled as the man's way of delivering the question managed to keep his nerves at bay. "Master Pang, I will admit I am attracted to Fei Yan and I think her sincerity is refreshing...but she is now under my command and one of my students."
"Are you still interested in the goat?"
"Not in the least." He handed him a sheet of paper detail Xing Cai's harassment claims. He was going to deliver it on the way to bed, but when the opportunity presented itself you should certainly multitask. "However I do hear they are great for disposing of paperwork."
"Father of the year I tell you." Tong mumbled and read the report. "Well I like the statements from the innocent bystanders of how she also fondled her."
"I like Guan Suo's stick figure drawing myself." Zhao Yun smirked.
"Where exactly were you when this was happening?" Tong asked. "It was implied that you were supervising these kids?"
"You'll see what an interesting task that is in this camp." He smiled.
"So I hear." Tong sat back and eyed the man. He seemed very genuine. "I guess it's better than babysitting Liu Shan, I hear the thought the whole lobster scenario was acceptable since his Uncle Fei talked about having crabs "down there"."
Zhao Yun groaned. "That sounds like Shan. Poor kid needs a mother."
Tong frowned. So was that it? Were these kids completely out of control because they didn't have a mother? "Well, thanks for the progress report, I suppose I better be off to chat with my daughter before she causes more problems. Thanks for standing up for her, by the way, you're a pretty decent guy despite what your dating habits say about you."
Zhao Yun smiled and picked at his dinner. "She's cute, but I'm not quite sure I want to jump straight to a tracheotomy on the first date. She moves a little fast for me."
"Yeah, told her not to get Nipples involved until at least the second date. Kids these days."
"Quite the first day, huh?" Tong dropped the stack of paperwork onto of her drawing tablet and then threw his hat off onto his cot. "Better get started on your homework if you're going to be ready for practice at dawn."
Fei Yan frowned. "This is your paperwork not mine."
"No, this is now your paperwork for being a hellion and tearing up camp on our first day."
"I was just..."
"You were just being my unruly daughter who grew up in the wild with a less than ideal father. Yup, you're the monster I created and I have to curb you in before you make the same mistakes I did. "
"So now I'm a mistake?" She tried to turn it around on him and saw in his eyes he wasn't amused.
"When you're young, you don't think about the consequences of your actions but you're still old enough to burn bridges that will ultimately reroute the course of your life." He wondered if repairing the damage with Kongming was even possible. He realized now how much he missed his old friend.
"I thought they determined Liu Shan's testicles were still in good working order." She replied.
"Did you try to sabotage his chances with Xing Cai so you could take a shot at her?"
"News travels fast."
"Not quite the appropriate way to start a relationship." Tong took off his cloak and thew it on the bed. "Not that I really provided you with the most stellar example to model yourself after."
"You're serious about this paperwork?" She asked, now worried that their conversation had not returned to normal, playful banter.
"Yes." He fell into his cot and closed his eyes. "About the only way I can think to punish you and make you realize what you did is to deal with the bureaucratic aftermath. Added bonus is that it will keep you up all night and you'll be way too tired tomorrow to cause problems."
"I was expecting some sort of speech..."
"I don't have anything. I'm disappointed in myself for failing you and I can't really be mad at you for being the daughter I raised. Goodnight kiddo, hope we don't have to have this conversation again tomorrow night."
Fei Yan looked at the paperwork and suddenly felt bad. She never meant to hurt her father, he was all that matter to her. "I'm sorry...I didn't mean to..."
"It's a learning experience." He sighed. For both of them it seemed. "Just don't get creative with those reports."