After Chloe
Beca blinked. She'd forgotten that this - a capella - was something people actually cared about. Well, she knew Jesse had fallen in love with the singing sport since he'd first seen Pentatonix on YouTube, but she'd figured he was just a major nerd. She watched Chloe's eyes shift over her left shoulder, and turned to see Jesse running towards her excitedly.
"Man, they are, like, the coolest people." Jesse beamed, then turned to the girls at the table. "Hi, I'm Jesse."
"Chloe." Chloe held out her hand towards him. "And this is Aubrey."
"We're the captains of the Barden Bellas." Aubrey commented.
"Cool." Jesse said. "I'm auditioning to become a Treble."
Aubrey scoffed and rolled her eyes, but Chloe just smiled. "Don't mind her." The redhead said, looking pointedly at her friend. "She believes the Trebles don't respect us."
Beca snorted quietly. Chloe turned back to the tiny brunette.
"So, do you want to join?"
Jesse looked at Beca, who shook her head quickly.
Chloe's face fell, and Beca wanted to melt at her look of disappointment.. "Oh, that's too bad." The redhead said sadly. "We could have really used your help."
Beca looked at Jesse frantically. He raised his eyebrows at her, confused. She looked pointedly at the crestfallen redhead before looking back to Jesse.
"One second." Jesse grabbed Beca's arm and pulled her a little away from the booth. "What?"
"Do something!" She hissed. "Make her feel better or something, I don't know."
"How am I supposed to do that?" He asked.
"I don't know, Jesse. Tell her one of your jokes or something."
"No, Beca, I will not tell her one of my jokes. I'm saving them for when I really need them."
Beca huffed in exasperation. "Just- do something!" She wiped at her eyes, surprised to find tears threatening to fall.
"Why are you so upset about this?" Jesse asked incredulously.
Beca whimpered in frustration. "She's sad, okay? It looks like someone just killed her new puppy. Just do something. Please?"
Jesse sighed. "Okay, this is important to you, so I'll do something. But you owe me."
Beca nodded and pushed him back towards the booth where the girls were watching in curiosity. Jesse thought fast - he hadn't had time to come up with an excuse for his friend's behavior.
"Uh, hey again." He spluttered, waving awkwardly at the two a capella captains. "We weren't talking about you…"
Beca facepalmed from behind him.
"Just, uh…" Jesse quickly grabbed the first idea he thought of. "My friend was wondering if you would like to go out with her."
Beca's hand dropped from her forehead.
What.
"Really?" Chloe asked.
"Yeah." Jesse turned and shot Beca an apologetic look. It was too late to go back now.
"What's your friend's name?" Chloe asked curiously, examining the brunette.
"Beca." Jesse answered, relieved that Chloe didn't seem to be disgusted. "Beca Mitchell."
"Beca?" Chloe called. "Can you come here?"
Beca nervously shuffled a few feet forward, shooting Jesse a death glare.
"You want to go out with me?" Chloe asked. Beca stayed still, hoping Chloe would interpret her silence as whatever the correct answer to this situation would be.
Aubrey voiced the question they were all thinking. "Chloe, are you really thinking about this?"
"Shh, Bree." Chloe held up a finger to silence her friend. Beca started to squirm under the intense gaze of the beautiful redhead. So far, college was not going the way she thought it would be.
Chloe finally snapped out of her thoughtful haze, looking up. She didn't look at Aubrey or Jesse, instead looking directly at Beca herself.
"Okay, I'll do it." Chloe smiled happily. "Tomorrow at seven. Wear something nice."
And so Beca found herself digging through her dresser the next day, stopping every once in awhile to glare at Jesse, who had been chatting aimlessly from her desk the entire time.
"I'm so glad this entire thing worked out." He said. "Luckily she doesn't think you're a creep or anything, so that's good. Plus her friend was totally hot. I might have to get you to do some scouting for me if this works out."
Beca rolled her eyes at her best friend.
"Which it totally will. I mean, she seemed pretty interested yesterday. Hell, she stared at you for, like, five minutes. And clearly you don't have a problem with any of this, which is good, because even if she doesn't want to date you, she can still be your friend, and you do kind of need more of those."
Beca kicked Jesse's chair to get him to shut up before holding up the clothes she'd found - a blue long sleeve button up with a pair of ultraskinny black jeans.
"Ooh, hot." He commented. "Brings out your eyes. I bet Chloe's one of those girls who really goes for eyes. Not to mention your boobs look great in that shirt."
Beca kicked her friend's chair again, and he raised his hands in surrender. "Okay, okay. Go change, weirdo. You have, like, half an hour."
Beca nodded and slipped into the bathroom, quickly changing clothes before starting on her usual mess of dark eye makeup and light lipstick. She brushed through her hair gently, letting it fall in chocolate brown curls over her shoulders. Once she was satisfied that there were no visible cuts, she stepped out of the bathroom.
Jesse whistled playfully. The brunette slapped his arm lightly, and he recoiled in faux pain.
There was a confident knock at Beca's door, and she spun, nervously wringing her hands together as she approached the door. She opened it to reveal Chloe, dressed in a dark red dress that stopped mid-thigh. Her hair was pinned up into a complicated bun, and her lips were painted to match her dress.
"You look beautiful." Beca murmured, then blushed.
Chloe beamed at her. "You do too. And it's nice to hear your voice."
Beca heard a snicker from behind her. She turned to glare at Jesse, who simply waved.
"Hi Chloe. Have fun, Becs."
Beca rolled her eyes and stepped out of her dorm, closing the door behind her.
"You ready to go?" Chloe asked.
Beca nodded, following Chloe down the hall.
Much to Beca's surprise, the date went amazingly well. Chloe didn't pressure her into speaking, nor was she perturbed by her date's lack of socialization skills. The redhead carried the conversation, much to Beca's happiness and relief. The brunette was surprised when Chloe insisted on walking her back to her dorm, and even more surprised when the redhead asked for a second date.
Much to Chloe's delight (and Jesse's amusement) Beca had agreed wholeheartedly to the second date. And the third, and the fourth, until there were too many to count. A few dates quickly built into a serious relationship, and pretty soon Chloe was asking her to stay the night, which was a problem for two reasons.
First, Beca had literally no experience. Zero. None. Sure, she and Chloe had kissed a few times, but she'd never done, or even thought of doing anything beyond that.
Second, she still had scars. Not just emotional scars, but literal, physical scars. Scars that Chloe had yet to see. She wasn't really sure how to prepare Chloe for everything she'd been through. Not like she could just walk up to her girlfriend and say "Hey Chlo, guess what? The reason I'm so awkward and socially distant is because of my alcoholic mother and deadbeat father who was in and out half the time. Also, I have scars and no romantic or sexual experience. Wanna watch a movie?"
She had stopped cutting since arriving at Barden, and for that both she and Jesse were grateful. But she couldn't exactly get rid of the hundreds of faded white lines running across her upper arms and stomach. She'd done extensive research into scar removal, and almost every website agreed that once scars were more than five months old, it was impossible to remove them without surgery.
She didn't know how to bring it up, so she didn't. She continued to wear long sleeves and avoid crop tops, and so far it had been working. She decided to procrastinate until the subject brought itself forward.
Which it did, a few days later.
"Hey." Chloe had welcomed the small brunette into her apartment. "So, I was wondering something."
Beca sat down on Chloe's couch wordlessly, but nodded for her to continue.
"You always wear long sleeves, and I've been trying not to ask about it, but I know there's something you're not telling me."
Beca froze, staring straight ahead from her place on the couch. She slowly moved her head to look at her girlfriend, eyes fearful.
"Becs, I have a pretty good idea of what it is. And I'm not gonna get mad, or break up with you. Okay?" Chloe knelt by her girlfriend. "Just trust me?"
Beca slowly nodded, and Chloe began to pull her sleeve up. When there was no trace of damage on her wrist, she raised her eyes curiously to look into Beca's.
"Higher." Beca mumbled, and Chloe pulled until the sleeve was almost at the brunette's elbow. The scars were fully visible now, the light lines contrasting with her pale skin.
"Honey." Chloe wrapped her arms around the petite girl. "Why would you ever do this to yourself?"
Beca shrugged.
"Words, Becs. I know you have them." Chloe said, releasing her girlfriend's sleeve and taking her hands instead.
"I don't know." Beca mumbled. "It felt good. That's all."
"Do you still-" Chloe started, but Beca cut her off with a hurried "No."
"How long has it been?" Chloe asked.
Beca shrugged again. "I haven't since I came here. Since, you know, since I met you."
Chloe nodded thoughtfully, but stayed quiet.
And for once, Beca decided to speak up.
"I was born four months early." She started. "I had to live in NICU until I could breathe on my own."
"You don't have to tell me, Beca."
"Yes, I do." Beca closed her eyes. "When I finally came home, dad wasn't around much. He always came home late and left early. Mom took care of me for the most part, until I was six.
"Dad was always yelling at her about dumb things. One time he got home too late and his food was cold. He slapped her, hard, and she fell and hit her head on the side of the table. I watched the whole thing from the top of the stairs. I was five. After that, mom started to drink. I didn't really understand it, so I didn't try to stop her. But dad didn't like it. He said she was weak for turning to alcohol. On my sixth birthday, I woke up early. Dad was screaming at mom. She was drunk, I think, and he didn't like it. He told her he had been seeing someone else, and that he wanted a divorce. And she laughed and said 'over my dead body.'"
Chloe squeezed Beca's hands tighter, bracing herself for what was coming.
"He beat her down. Worse than he ever had before. He said he could take anything whenever he wanted it, including a divorce. He said he loved his other girl, Shelia, more than he'd ever loved either of us."
Tears had started to fall down Beca's cheeks, running over her lips and dripping off her chin, but she continued.
"He left a few minutes after she passed out. And I always thought it was my fault. That the reason he left was because I wasn't a good enough daughter for him. And that it was my fault.
"I met Jesse in sixth grade, and he was immediately my best friend. My only friend. He didn't care that I didn't like talking, 'cause he talked enough for the both of us. And he didn't care that my mom was how she was. He didn't mind staying in my room when he came over, and he let me stay at his house for days on end when mom went through one of her bad spells. He never tried to fix me, though he did try to help me for a little. And he did. He helped me understand what was going on."
Chloe nodded, watching Beca struggle to find the words to explain herself.
"He gave me his dad's old mixer. He used to joke that I'd be famous someday and he'd be my wingman. He said he'd follow me all the way to LA to help me achieve my dream. He even sent in a few demos. But then eighth grade came, and it was so much harder than everything else. I was bullied, and Jesse couldn't always be there to protect me, though he did try. So I started doing this." Beca gestured to the scars, self consciously watching Chloe's face for any signs of disgust.
"Beca." Chloe whispered. "I had no idea. I'm so sorry."
Beca shook her head. "Don't be. Because you know what happened after that?"
Chloe raised her eyebrows curiously.
"After that, I met you." Beca whispered. "And I can't lie and say that things immediately got better, because they didn't. And I can't say I fell in love with you at first sight, because I didn't. And I can't promise that things with me won't get hard sometimes. And if you're too freaked out by all of this, I can't make you stay."
Chloe shook her head, tears glistening in her eyes.
"Beca, you are amazing." The redhead began. "You're funny and sweet, and you make me feel so special."
Beca sniffed quietly as Chloe continued.
"And I can't say I understand, because I don't." Chloe said truthfully. "But I also can't believe I got lucky enough to meet you. And I can't believe you trust me enough to share everything. And I love how small you are, because you are the perfect height for me to do this."
Chloe stood up, pulling the brunette along with her. She leaned in carefully, pressing her lips softly against her girlfriend's. They stayed like that until they ran out of breath and had to pull away.
"I couldn't be happier right now." Chloe confessed.
"I can't imagine life without you." Beca mumbled.
"Good." Chloe hugged her girlfriend tightly. "Because you shouldn't have to."
And Beca just closed her eyes and let herself be happy.