Okay, here's the next and final chapter. I could have made this a oneshot, but that wouldn't have made you wonder. I like to make anticipation a reality. Again, I don't own Digimon. No one ever thought I did.
For a few days after the incident, Kari came over my house. I needed time to recover before I faced Tai again. It wasn't that I was hurting. I was actually numb. But this allowed me to keep going without hurting. I certainly appreciated this. Plus, it gave Kari an excuse to get out of the house with her brother and his clingy girlfriend. It was a little too much, she said.
Finally, I got up the nerve to go over there again. I called first for a couple of days. This second time Tai and her were there, but I ignored it. Like I said, she was nice, and Tai was happy. But Kari brought something to my attention she thought important.
"You're not happy."
"But if everyone else wins, why should it matter?"
"Because, your feelings matter. To me, to Tai. Why can't you just tell him how you feel?"
"No Kari, I won't bring up history."
"But why? You two were so happy."
"That was then. He's changed. I've changed. And I refuse to hurt him if I go away."
"Is that what it's all about? Because you hurt him more by leaving him than you did by leaving. You broke his heart."
"We had a mutual agreement. We both decided it was better we separate when I left." I was getting good at this lying thing.
"But it hurt you both. And you're still hurting. I know you love him." I sighed deep when she said that.
"That's beside the point."
"What if he still loves you too?"
"Leave it alone Kari."
"I can't Sor, you're miserable. And I know that deep down my brother is too." I didn't know how to respond. I was miserable without him. But I refused to hurt him again if he was happy.
"That's okay." I got up to leave. I wasn't sure if she saw the tortured face or the tear in my eye, but I knew she was watching me. And so was Tai as I left.
I didn't call Kari for a couple of days. I didn't feel like facing that again. But when I finally went for a walk on Monday, I wound up at their doorway. I always wound up there. The thunder started, and so did a drizzle. So I opened the door without knocking.
There, on the couch, were Tai and Harley. They were under a blanket, obviously doing something. I don't know how long I stood there gaping or when they noticed, but Tai put his pants on and came to me. I was still staring in shock. He asked me if I was okay. I think, but my mouth wouldn't move. I was stuck. His voice was whispered, my head was cloudy, and I was unresponsive. Until my eyes focused on him, and I muttered,
"I should be going." When I opened the door, it was really raining. Thunder and lightening came occasionally. Tai grabbed my arm.
"Don't go out in this." The sky was growing black.
"Let me go Tai."
"Please, it's bad out there."
"I said, let me go Tai." Still he didn't listen.
"At least stay in Kari's room."
"Let go of me!" I yanked my arm away. He had to have seen the look on my face, the tears starting to form.
"Sora. . ." I walked away quickly before he could say anything else. Kari passed me on her way up.
"What's wrong?" But I didn't stop. Memories were racing through my mind.
"I'll love you forever Sora. Don't forget that."
"Are you sure you want to do this? It's okay if you don't."
"I'd wait for you forever Sora. I wouldn't trust anyone else with this."
He had promised me I was the only one he would ever make love to. He would wait for me forever. But then I knew just how short forever was. And I had never been more lost in my life.
It was pouring. The wind blew fiercely. As I cried my eyes out, I sat down against a tree. Thunder shook the ground. That's when it happened.
I woke for a second to hear medics trying to get me to talk. I couldn't. My body felt limp, my eyes heavy. Someone said something about being in critical condition. That's when I knew. I was going to die there. In the rain that I loved so much. Without the people who cared about me. But then I heard Tai's voice. And I blacked out.
I had no idea that a thunderstorm would ultimately be the death of me. But as I lay there in a world of black, I knew that it would be. I began to run; everything around me was black. Screaming Tai's name was my only vice. His voice was the last I heard. And he was the one I wanted.
Eventually, I have up running. What hope did I have? No one could hear me. I was doomed to die. But then a voice began to call me name. And there was Tai, walking toward me, a smile on his face. He reached for my hand, and I took it so he could pull me up.
"You can't give up Sora."
"Why shouldn't I? There's nothing to stay for. My world is black."
"It won't always be black."
"Yes it will. As long as I can't have you my world is black."
"But you can have me Sor. I love you more than you know."
"Then why are you with her? Why are you doing this to me?"
"Just keep fighting. I know you can do it."
"Please just tell me why."
"I have to go. You are strong. You can make it."
"Don't leave me, please."
"Good bye." And he was gone. But I thought about the words he said.
I began to see a bright light. Was I in heaven? But the sound of machines beeping assured me I couldn't be. Then where was I? And were did he go?
"Tai?" I blinked, and the room became clearer. I was in a bed. Machines were hooked to my arms, my nose had breathing tubes in them.
"I'm here Sora." He took my hand gently. "How are you feeling?"
"Sore. But otherwise okay, for the most part." Yes, my heart was hurting. It was in two.
"I'm sorry. You didn't need to see that." He looked away, ashamed.
"What could I expect? You couldn't wait forever."
"But I swore I would. This was such a big mistake. And then I let you leave."
"You didn't let me leave. I forced my way out. It was foolish to go out in that storm."
"I should have stopped you. Bit I didn't. Then Kari made me go after you. I hate to tell you, you'll think I'm a sissy, but she found me crying in the living room." He shook his head. "She had to make me snap out of it so I could chase you."
"I would never think you're a sissy Tai, you have the crest of courage. Besides, I'm sure it was stressful."
"Harley didn't see it that way. She took one look at me and told me it was over. Of course, I'm sure it was that mixed with the fact that she could tell how involved I had been with you." He laughed uncomfortably. "Kari slapped her and pushed her out the door. That's when I started to be brought back to my senses."
"I'm so sorry Tai. That's not fair to you. I'll have to punch her myself." This time he laughed for comfortably.
"Though a girl fight wouldn't be bad to watch, it's okay. I never really loved her anyway." I looked at the bed. I'm sure he saw the question that plagued me. "Sor, I only slept with her because I thought it was the right thing to do. She kept asking me, and I couldn't say no . . ." I nodded. Though I could have judged him, I wouldn't. Guys are guys, and they won't ever be anything else. "But with you, things were just so different. I love you so much, and everything we've shared has been nothing but special. You're my best friend." He squeezed me hand. Then, I noticed what he said. He didn't say, 'loved you so much', he said love, as in present tense.
"Tai . . ." Tears were catching in my eyes. Damn my emotions. When I looked up, he noticed.
"Are you okay?"
"I'm fine. But Tai, you just said. . . you just said you love me. You didn't say you used to love me. You said you do. Is that true?" His eyes were full of emotion.
"You couldn't tell by the fact I was so upset I hurt you? That I started crying because of it? I never stopped loving you Sor. I just always wondered why you stopped loving me." That did it. Emotional overload. Now I am crying ridiculously hard like an idiot. Because I am an idiot. I should have never left Tai. He continued to clutch my hand. "Please don't cry, it's okay you don't love me." I would cry harder if I could.
"No you idiot! You jump to conclusions too much. I still love you, I always have, and always will. Nothing could ever change that." The face he made showed just how dumbstruck he was.
"But you left me. You said we couldn't work."
"Because I was going away to school! I didn't want to hurt you. I knew I'd be gone for a long time, so it was better that way. That didn't mean I don't still love you."
"Sora, you going away to school, I can handle that. But when you told me you wanted to break up, that tore me in two. You should have just talked to me about it." I just have to bury my face in my hands. I was such a moron. But I really had been trying to take his feelings into consideration.
"I'm so sorry Tai. It's breaking my heart to think that I wasn't just causing myself pain, but I was hurting you too. I didn't know." He brushed my cheek, causing me to look at him.
"We both should have spoken up. But we didn't. The real issue now is figuring out where to go from here." I can't believe my ears. Is he really trying to work this out, after I've caused both of us so much pain? Stupid Tai.
"You really still love me." I said it more as a statement to myself than as a question. But still he replied.
"Yes. More than you can imagine."
"Would you still be with me? Even after all this?"
"In a heartbeat." That's all the convincing I need.
"First you save my life, then you make me the happiest girl ever. I love you Taichi. I really would like to be with you." I hadn't told him yet about the experience I had while I was passed out. I don't know that I ever will.
"Then you will be." He brings my hand to his lips and kisses it. What a sweetheart. All I know is that I love the rain about ten times as much as before, because it brought me and Tai back together.
