All Of My Chapter Titles Are Based On Song Names You Can Look Up The Songs On Youtube. This Week's Chapter Is Based On The Song- "Save Yourself, I'll Hold Them Back" by My Chemical Romance
If You Listen To The Lyrics, You Will Hopefully Understand Why I Named This Chapter After It.
Tumblr: KobraPartyGhoul
And
My Beta's Tumblr: holygaskarthonatricycle
I Can't Always Just Forget Him
Chapter Two:
You're A Heart Attack In Black Hair Dye
The diner is small, old, and practically empty. It's a tourist place but since it's off-season, no one really bothers to visit. Gerard sits in the booth closest to the door and asks the waitress for some chicken noodle soup and a cup of coffee. As he looks around, he sees the familiar bright red hoodie he saw earlier that day. It isn't really the hoodie that interests him though, it's the guy who's wearing it. He has black hair with this insane red on the sides, it looks pretty cool. Gerard watches as the guy puts his own cup of coffee on the seat next to him and tries to hide the fact that he's pouring alcohol into it. Since Gerard just became sober after years of alcohol abuse, he tries to look away, but is too enthralled by the strange man to do anything about it. The guy catches Gerard staring and brings his cup to his lips, winks, and takes a drink. Gerard quickly looks down and pulls out his sketchbook, trying to appear busy.
Why do I fall in love with every person who shows me the tiniest bit of attention?
Gerard watches as the short guy gets up from his booth and waltzes out the door. Once he's finished with his food, Gerard shoves his sketchbooks back into his bag, leaves a tip on the table, and heads back to the train station. His adventure for the day was over.
Gerard sits on a bench to wait for the train. He reaches in his coat pocket and pulls out a pack of cigarettes, takes one stick out, lights it, and shoves the rest back into pocket. As he's taking in his surroundings, he sees the man in the red hoodie coming towards him. Gerard breathes out a puff of smoke and sees the guy smile painfully big while waving enthusiastically. "This weirdo is acting like he knows me, what the fuck? Wait...does he know me?" Gerard waves back timidly before throwing his cigarette on the ground and stepping on it. The guy sits on a bench on the far side of the platform. Gerard stares at him for a moment before taking out his sketchbook and staring at it, trying to conceal his awkwardness.
By the time the train comes, Gerard has already done a full sketch of the strange hooded man. He cannot help but to notice a tattoo poking out from the edge of the guy's hoodie. He also notices the lip ring he has in, it's incredibly hot. Great, now he feels like a creeper. Gerard sighs, grabs his stuff, and boards the train, finding a seat far away from any other person. Right before the doors shut, the strange guy jumps onto the train and sits at the opposite end of the car. Gerard looks out the window, tries to look like he's zoned out, but he can feel the strange man watching him, and it's a bit unnerving. After a while, Gerard hears a faint sound like someone talking and realizes it might be directed at him. He looks up to see the strange person looking at him expectedly.
"I'm sorry?" Gerard tries not to look awkward with his response.
"Why?" is all the guy says.
Gerard looks at him like he's nuts and spits out, "Why, what?"
"Why are you sorry? I just said hi."
"No, I didn't know if you were talking to me or not so..."
The strange man looks around at the empty car before raising an eyebrow and asking, "Really? Dude, we're the only ones in here."
Gerard blushes. "I didn't wanna assume."
The guy laughs before saying, "Aw c'mon, live dangerously. Assume someone is talking to you in an otherwise empty car."
"Okay, sorry again, hi," Gerard sputters.
The guy gets up and starts walking towards Gerard. "Is it okay if I move closer so I don't have to scream? Not that I don't like screaming once in a while...But I don't wanna bug you if you're drawing or anything."
Gerard clears his throat. "Well uh I probably won't think of much to say so..."
"Oh well," the guy stops in the middle of the car and bites his lip, looking unsure.
"I mean," Gerard waves his hands around. "You can sit here if you want, I didn't mean to sound like an ass."
"Hey man, I don't wanna bug you if-"
"No, no, it's okay, really." Gerard smiles and tries to look nice.
"Okay, just to ya know..chat a little, maybe. I've got a long ride ahead of me and didn't bring anything to pass the time." The man sits across the aisle from Gerard and tries to not look as awkward as he feels.
"So, how far you goin? I mean, how far are you traveling?"
"Rockville Center."
"Get out! Me too! What are the odds?" The guy looks too excited that he and Gerard are going to the same place.
"The weirdest part is that I think I recognize you. I thought so earlier in the diner. That's why I was looking at you. You work at Guitar Center, right?"
"Oh man, really? That's so cool! What a small world! I've been a guitar slave there for like five years!" He looks so thrilled that Gerard recognized him.
"Really? Because-"
"Jesus! Has it been five years? I gotta quit soon." The guy said, mostly to himself.
"-because I go there all the time. I don't think I ever saw you before."
"Well I'm there, I hide in the back as much as humanly possible. You got a cell? I gotta quit right now. I'll call in dead."
"Uh no, I don't have one," Gerard laughs.
"I'll start a band, just like my grandfather!"
"I noticed your hair. It's pretty rad. I guess that's what made the impression on me."
"Ahh, the hair," the guy shakes his head, making some black strands fall in front of his eyes. "Black and red, right? The red is called Red Menace. Pretty catchy name, huh?"
Gerard smiles. "Yeah, I like it."
"This company makes a whole line of colors with equally cool names. Blue Ruin, Yellow Fever, Green Revolution. That'd be a kick ass job! That's what I'll do, come up with names. Fuck the band."
"I don't really know how-"
"Purple Haze, Pink Eraser."
"Do you think there could be a job like that? There's only so many colors, I mean. I'm an artist, and I know all about colors but there's not that many."
The guy suddenly looked pissed off, offended somehow. "Somebody's got that job."
Gerard was about to apologize when the man's face completely changed into an impossibly excited one.
"Agent Orange! I came up with that one! Anyway, there are endless color possibilities! I'd be great at a job like that."
"I'm sure you would-"
"My writing career! Your hair written by Frank Iero."
"You don't look like a Frank."
"Yeah well I am one! Ya know, I've tried all of their colors. Every single fucking one. More than once, too. I'm getting too old for this. It keeps me from having to develop an actual personality. I apply my personality in a paste. You?"
"I highly doubt that's true," Gerard snickers.
"Well you don't know me. So you don't know, do you?" He was back to being pissed.
"I'm sorry, I was just trying to be nice, I-"
"Yeah, I got it, okay?"
There was an awkward silence for a long time.
"I'm Frank, by the way," the guy said while offering a hand to Gerard.
"I'm Gerard," he says while shaking Frank's hand.
"No jokes about my height, okay? Oh wait. You wouldn't do that, you're trying to be nice."
"I don't really know how someone would joke about your height so.."
"Whatever, just don't think I won't kick your ass just because I'm small," Frank says with a smirk.
"See, I wouldn't think that about you."
"Why wouldn't you think that about me?" Frank shouted, once again going from happy to pissed off in a matter of seconds.
"I uh...I just...you seem nice so..." Gerard stuttered.
"Oh, now I'm nice? Jesus! Don't you know any other adjectives? There's careless and snotty and overbearing and argumentative...mumpish."
"Uhm...sorry."
They sit in silence for a long time, Gerard feeling extremely uncomfortable.
"I just don't think that nice is an interesting thing to be. What is nice anyway? I mean besides an adjective. I guess it can be an adverb...sort of. It doesn't reveal anything. Nice is pandering, cowardly. Life is more interesting than that. Or, it should be. Jesus, I hope it is. I don't need to be nice and I don't need anyone to be it at me," Frank says without pausing for a breath.
"Okay," is all Gerard can think to say.
Gerard tries not to look as Frank reaches into his bag and pulls out the small bottle of alcohol he had at the diner. Frank takes a quick drink and offers Gerard some and it takes everything he has in him to refuse.
"Gerard? It is Gerard, right?" Frank asks while putting away the bottle.
"Uh, yeah."
"I'm sorry for yelling at you. Could that be considered yelling? I can't really tell. Anyway, I'm just a little fucked up today."
"That's okay, I'm in the same boat as you," Geard replies.
Frank looks out the window and begins to talk again. "My embarrassing admission is that I really like that you're nice. Right now, anyway. I can't really tell what I'm going to like from one minute to the next. But right now, I'm glad that you said it's okay. That was...nice of you."
"It's no problem...anyway I have some stuff I have to-"
"Oh!" Frank stands up and throws his bag over his shoulder. "Well sure, I'll just...well...take care then!"
Gerard pulls his sketchbook from his messenger bag and says, "I'll probably see you at the store, unless you get the color naming job."
Frank only smiles and stares out the window. Once Gerard gets into his rhythm drawing, he hardly notices Frank inching towards him and watching him closely until the train finally pulls into the station. They both smile at each other and step onto the platform, going different ways.