Hello. This isn't going to be a necessarily conventional unrequited Tokka story, in case you were wondering. Although I do love those as well. This part is more of a narrative; I hope it isn't too droll.

02

When something happens to you while you're dreaming, your mind tries to explain it so that you don't wake up. If you fall out of bed in real life, you're pretty likely to dream yourself falling off a cliff. The experience for me has always been more exhausting than exciting, usually because I know I'm dreaming.

Because in my dreams, she's never a factor.

When I first joined Aang in his mission to defeat the Firelord, I expected us to split up. The divide was inevitable, really, so I kept my distance from the group. But Sokka managed to grow on me a few weeks in, and our relationship evolved quickly after that. I hadn't had a real friend before him, and the way we matched up built such an attachment, I had begun to forget about the group's impending separation.

And I liked him. I liked him as a person; how our thoughts were parallel even though our personalities weren't, and how I felt so comfortable and relaxed and safe around him, even though I've always known that I don't need protection. I felt free of any insecurities, restrictions, anxieties; even ones I didn't know I had.

And after I had let go of everything, it was impossible to get it all back.

I remember when Sokka and Zuko left to "get meat". They were gone for days, and I was a little disappointed because I kind of missed messing with Sparky and hanging out with Snoozles, even if I managed to successfully mask it. My feet were nearly healed at that point, but it was still nice to have Sokka carry me around. I like being waited on, as long as I'm the one to initiate it.

Anyway. I was looking forward to their return. And, predictably, I realized that I had absolutely no reason for such an anticipation.

"The meat of friendship and fatherhood."

Friendship my ass! Last time I checked, friends don't make out every chance they get or have secret meetings in tents if you know what I mean and I think you do.

But I liked Suki. She was nice enough and impressively skilled for a non-bender. We got along far better than Katara and I had when we first met, but that might be because Suki gets along with everyone. She's so socially capable and genuinely friendly. Smart, too. Not smart like Sokka, but I mean… she can still hold up a conversation surprisingly well.

I still can't say there was ever a fondness. I liked Suki for who she was instead of what she was, the latter being a total intruder. I'm sure she didn't do it intentionally. It isn't her fault that Sokka ditched and alienated the rest of us when they had a chance to be alone, or that she suddenly became his first priority without having been with the rest of us for even two days.

Sure, yeah, he'd make time for me now and again, when Suki was off training or talking to Katara. It isn't like we totally stopped talking or lost a connection. Our connection simply disappeared every time Suki came back into the picture.

"'Thanks for saving my life, Toph!' Oh, no problem, Sokka."

I really should have seen it coming.

10 06 10

I know these chapters are hideously short (like ¼ of what a regular chapter should be lolol) but I'll be updating at least once a day until the story gets more substance.