Chapter II: Lost in the Forest

He had never been this nervous coming home before. For the few minutes he waited for Hayley to pick him up from the airport, Lucas changed his mind maybe a hundred times. He walked back to the sales counter to buy a ticket back to New York but he just couldn't take his wallet out. Thinking that he couldn't wait another minute, he considered taking a taxi right away. He dialled his daughter's daycare hoping they'd give him a reason to fly back, but he hung up before they could answer. Pacing back and forth outside the terminal, he told himself he couldn't leave now. After so many unreturned voicemails and emails, Brooke would have no choice but to talk to him...to listen to him. Lucas was on a mission; there was no stopping until he had his say. He was so lost in his own thoughts that he didn't notice Hayley running towards him until he felt her familiar hug.

Hayley: "Welcome home Lucas Scott. I have missed you."

Lucas: "You too Hales. You too."

Hayley quickly separated and stepped behind him with a curious look.

H: "Where's Peyton? Where's my beautiful niece?"

L: "It's just me this time."

H: "What do you mean? Did they miss the flight? Are they coming later?"

L: "No Hales, they're not coming."

H: "Is Sawyer ok?"

L: "Yes, yes, she's fine. She's great. It's not about that."

H: "What's going on Luke?"

L: "Take a breath. Everything's fine Hayley. But these bags are getting heavy. Can we talk in the car?"

H: "Okay, but you'd better tell me everything."

Hayley helped Lucas with his bags and led him to her car, but not before giving him one more hug. They hadn't seen each other since Lucas and Peyton had left Tree Hill three years ago. They tried to keep in touch, but the frequency of contact fell short of ideal especially after the birth of her second child 4 months ago. Nathan and Hayley named their daughter Lydia, after Hayley's mother. First order of business was to share pictures of the newborn, but it didn't take long for Hayley to ask for the full story why Lucas had arrived alone. While he answered Hayley's questions, he couldn't help but notice she was asking the same questions Brooke had six weeks ago in New York.

Six weeks ago, Lucas's Office, New York City

Brooke: "Hello Mr. Scott. Your 10 o'clock is here."

Lucas: "Brooke? How did they let you up here without calling me?"

B: "You know I have my ways. I'll give you one hint. Your assistant's wearing my designs."

L: "What are you doing here?"

B: "Can't I visit my friend? Julian's in Europe promoting his new movie so I thought I'd take a trip of my own. You haven't seen me in almost three years. Now I'm standing right in front of you and how I got here is all you want to talk about?"

Lucas shook off his surprise with a smile and walked around his desk to give her a hug.

B: "That's more like it."

L: "I have missed you."

B: "So why aren't you acting like it? You still haven't rsvp'd for the wedding. You and Peyton have something better to do that week?"

L: "Brooke, I'm sorry about that. It's been quite hectic here lately."

B: "What's up?"

L: "It's just work. You see these piles I have to edit? Books, articles, screenplays...I'm swamped."

B: "Edit? How do you find time to edit someone else's work? Aren't you writing anymore?"

L: "Not lately."

B: "Okay. What is going on? When have you become Mr. Professional living in his office, correcting other people's stories? Who are you?"

L: "Brooke, three years is a long time. Are you telling me you haven't changed one bit? I don't expect you to understand."

B: "I want to understand. You, me, a cup of coffee. Let's get out."

L: "I can't right now. I have this deadline..."

B: "Seriously? You've seen how I worked the assistant. Point me to the boss."

L: "Ok, Ok...sometimes I forget you can't say no to Brooke Davis. Let's go."

Over coffee and with that disarming smile, Brooke slowly started to bring down Lucas's walls and get him to tell the real story. He and Peyton had officially separated three months ago, but their marriage had been on the rocks long before that. They were living apart, but sharing custody of Sawyer. Brooke thought that explained why Peyton wasn't answering her calls or why there was no one at home when she stopped by this morning. Peyton had taken Sawyer with her to Los Angeles to see a band she wanted to sign for her label. And, Lucas was in New York trying to drown his sorrows in piles of badly written manuscripts.

B: "I am so sorry Luke. What can I do? Do you want me to talk to Peyton? Or should I be kicking your ass for screwing this up? If you want to tell me what went wrong, I'm here to listen."

L: "I don't know, Brooke. When we were travelling just the three of us, everything was fine. Maybe it was the high of new parenthood. Things started to fall apart when we moved here. Somehow we became two friends, two best friends, who happened to share a child. Our worlds moved farther away from one another each day. We started to avoid doing things together. You said it...I practically live in the office. And, Peyton, well, she travelled more and more with the label's clients. At the end, Sawyer was our only link. We both want to be good parents, but staying in an unhappy marriage is not being good parents. Wanting to make it work wasn't enough."

B: "Are you sure you can't fix this? I mean it's you and Peyton. Peyton and you. God, since the day you two met."

L: "Brooke, Peyton's living with her boyfriend."

B: "Ok, that settles whose ass I'm kicking."

L: "No, Brooke. It's ok. He's a nice guy actually. They work together. He makes her happy...the way I couldn't. The Brooke Davis I know would want that for her best friend. Am I right?"

B: "I want you both to be happy. I look at you...and Luke, you're miserable."

L: "Thanks. Look, I've felt better, yes. But, this isn't about Peyton, it's more about me. The choices I made, how wrong things turned out. I'm not who I was supposed to be...I'm not where I saw myself being. Does that make sense?"

B: "Then change it. Instead of sitting idly by watching life happen to you, get up, take charge. You were good at that once. I bet you can do it again."

L: "Just like that, huh? That easy?"

B: "It's not all doom and gloom. You have friends and family who love you and will support through anything. You have a beautiful daughter who idolizes you. You are insanely talented when you focus on your own original work. You live in the most alive, anything-can-happen-at-anytime city in the world. And you have me."

L: "I know that face. What are you up to?"

B: "Well, you need to have some fun and I know just the cheerleader. After all, you haven't seen New York until you've seen it with me."

Somehow Brooke managed to convince Lucas to take the day off and explore the city with her. There was only one rule...no talking about Peyton or work. First stop was walking across the Brooklynn Bridge for a pizza lunch at Grimaldi's. On the way back, they danced to the songs of the subway musicians followed by rowing at Central Park until they crashed on the lawn watching people pass by. Lucas hadn't felt this light, free, and...happy for a long time. Brooke had that effect on people, on him particularly...making him feel anything was possible, nothing was out of reach, all you had to do was believe. He hadn't believed in himself for far too long. How had she managed to change all that in just a few hours? Just this morning, there he was in his office yet again, jaded, struggling to keep reading someone else's words on paper. And now, here he was, barefoot, lying silent in the sun, with Brooke by his side, unable to contain his smile, with a million ideas for his next book flowing in that re-energized mind of his.

L: "How do you do that?"

B: "What?"

L: "Keep changing my life without even trying?"

Present Day, Tree Hill Island

Lucas had told Hayley the story of his separation from Peyton on the drive from the airport. He asked her to keep it between them for now. Neither Peyton nor Lucas was ready for the meddling and judgment that would follow their friends and family finding out. They were on the boat sailing towards Tree Hill Island now.

Hayley: "You can't keep this a secret forever you know. They are going to ask you where Peyton and Sawyer are the second you show up alone. By the way, I didn't tell them you were coming just as you asked. All these secrets are giving me a headache."

Lucas: "I'm sorry Hales for getting you in the middle of my drama. But, I couldn't lie to you. Thank you for keeping my arrival a surprise. I just wasn't sure if Brooke wanted to see me here this week."

H: "Why wouldn't Brooke want to see you? Luke, what's going on?"

L: "Nothing, literally nothing."

H: "How come I get the feeling you want something to be going on?"

Lucas was quiet, staring at the pier they were approaching, at the island were Brooke was...and, in a few minutes he would see her. Would she be happy to see him? What would she say? Better yet, what would he say? He wondered if she was looking back at him from the island. He took a deep breath and turned to look at Hayley.

H: "Oh no. I know that look. Don't do this. This is her wedding you're sailing to. You know that, right? Just this once, things may not go as you expect them to. I hope you know what you're doing. Please be careful Luke. I don't want to see you get hurt."

Lucas hugged her friend and promised her everything would be all right. He believed that maybe if he said it out loud enough times, maybe it would come true. As if the walk from the pier to the garden where everyone was gathered wasn't torture enough, he couldn't see Brooke in the crowd. While his eyes searched for her everywhere, he could barely hear everyone greeting him as a pleasant surprise, his brother hugging him, Julian shaking his hand, Jaime jumping up for his own hug and asking about Sawyer.

Lucas: "She's with Peyton in New York. They can't make it buddy. Peyton has to work this week. But she misses you very much. They both do."

Nathan gave Hayley a welcome kiss and handed over the baby monitor.

Nathan: "Lydia's napping inside."

As Hayley went inside to check on her daughter, Lucas asked where the bride was hiding.

Julian: "She went to grab some wine bottles from the cellar. I'll go check on her."
Lucas: "No, let me."

Julian: "Thanks man. She'll be happy to see you. Cellar's down the stairs to the left."

Lucas practically ran down the stairs; everything was a blur until he saw Brooke. She was standing only a few feet away, with her back to him, one arm extended over her head trying to reach a high shelf. She was wearing a dark green sun dress with a low cut back. Her hair was pulled up, exposing her neck. He knew the delicate moves of that neck, the curve of her back like the back of his hand. He snapped back to reality only when she called for help...she called for Julian. He slowly approached, her perfume getting more intense with each step. He was so close that only an inch more and he'd touch her. He reached up and grabbed the bottle only to hold it in front for her to take. He could tell she knew it was him...she was deliberately prolonging the moment, refusing to turn around. When she reached out for the bottle, her hand landed on his...a simple touch that sent shivers down his body. She finally turned around eyes closed. He wanted to hold her face, tell her to open her eyes and see him. But he couldn't find the strength to speak. When she finally raised her head and looked at him...her face was illuminated by a ray of light from the setting sun peering through the narrow cellar windows. She was more beautiful than he remembered...than he thought ever possible.

Lucas: "Hi pretty girl."

as if suddenly the roots I had left behind

cried out to me, the land I had lost with my childhood

and I stopped, wounded by the wandering scent.

~Pablo Neruda