Our thanks to a marvelous beta Corrupted Innocence, previosly known as Hikasa.
And don't take this story seriously:)
Disclaimer: Characters do not belong to us...
The Undertaker sat in a large chair made of dark, almost blackened wood behind the matching desk in his workshop. He couldn't seem to work at the moment, which was very unusual for him, as it was a well-known fact how much he loved his job. The thought of such a captivating Pink Angel warping into a Devil in Pink was at the forefront in his mind. He wondered how he managed to get himself in something as absurd as this.
"You'll be my slave for a day!"
Those incredibly shocking words echoed in his head, and the angry expression on such a delicate, pretty face haunted him now in his dreams.
How can something so charming be so frightening?
He glanced at the clock, the longest arrow was slowly moving to the number twelve written in gothic font. Five more minutes and the Devil in Pink would return, most likely crashing into something in process and bringing chaos along with her. He could just begin to think of the torture that he would possibly be subjected to.
What if she'll make me wear pink too? He thought in horror. He didn't have anything against the colour, even loved it. But he couldn't wear it! It would ruin his mysterious image! The Undertaker didn't have enough time to mourn on that thought, though. He had just went through the latest scenario that he would possibly be put through when the door burst open and someone dressed in a tight dress, made of pink leather, stepped over the threshold. It was the somewhat dreaded (by him at least,) devil dressed in pink. The maiden's shoulders were completely bare, and only two thin black laces tied in a knot on the back of her neck prevented her dress from falling and revealing the girl's entire décolletage.
Oh how the Undertaker wanted to cut those laces, and not only because of revenge. While he found that pink was a strange colour to pick to dress in, he found that the maiden managed to grasp both the seductive and awe inspiring looks in one ensemble. In short, it was nothing less than frightening.
The Devil in Pink turned to face him, and to his great shock and hidden amusement, he noticed that she held a leather whip within her gloved grasp.
"Hello, Undertaker." She whispered in a low voice, her eyes glinting excitedly behind her dark glasses.
"Ah…My Lady, I remember you wanting me to make a coffin for your deceased husband…"
"That can wait!" She answered quickly but determinedly. The Undertaker sighed as his attempt to make that day go easier for himself was shattered. "And now we are going shopping!"
"Huh?" Shopping? This makes hardly any sense at all. Whatever happened to her deceased husband?He didn't dare ask this question aloud, there was too much riding on it. It was mainly the fear of being dressed in pink.
The two left the little shop, Grell with his head held high, seemingly not paying attention to the pink whip that was bouncing against his hip as he moved. The other shinigami followed, sulking the entire time. The two were such an odd spectacle that many stopped to stare at them.
Suddenly Grell stopped.
"My Lady?"
"There's a pool of mud." The maiden stepped away to let the Undertaker see the sickening green liquid blocking their way.
"We can bypass it."
Grell thought about it for a moment; a pool of mud was not that large, but…Oh, he just thought of a brilliant idea. He had thought of an incredibly brilliant, devious idea.
"No. You'll carry me. Make sure to treat me properly my dear. The only way to accomplish that would be to carry me like a bride over such an annoyance."
"My Lady? Wouldn't it be easier to choose another way?" The Undertaker asked hopefully.
"Of course not! Don't even think about it! Now do the job already."
Grell glared at the poor man and the later had no choice but to obey. The Undertaker stepped closer to the angry mademoiselle, then very slowly and very carefully he put one hand on her back, after that as carefully, like she could start screaming and hitting him any second, he put his other hand to the maiden's knees and yet again hesitantly lifted her. The Undertaker stepped over the pool of mud, wetting his long black robe, careful not to drop the beauty in his arms; strangely she was rather heavier than she looked. As soon as he was on the other side of the pool he put her down and took a quick step to the side. But when the dark shinigami threw a glance at themaidensurprised that she didn't look angry anymore. A nice pink blush covered her cheeks and she looked kind of sweet that way. The maiden coughed and somewhat awkwardly ordered the other man to follow.
For the next few hours the Undertaker went through the hell of choosing new dresses, which were mostly pink, buying shoes, hats, gloves, corsets, laces and so on and so on…So the Undertaker had more than enough time to think about the person who was the main cause of his suffering, the one who in one moment had changed his peaceful life in some shopaholics heaven, meaning a real hell for an ex-shinigami and now the coffin maker.
She definitely could be called a mysterious woman. He still didn't know her name, which was very strange because never had an idea to ask for it occurred in the Undertaker's mind. Was it because his thoughts were preoccupied with more important things? Such as how was he going to survive through the whole day of nonstop shopping? It was boring and being bored was what he hated the most, well maybe after watching those awfully performing clowns. The only entertainment were the moments when the beautiful maiden shouted at the poor shopkeepers, if they were not fast enough or couldn't find a ribbon the shade of the colour she wanted. She was strange, the Undertaker assumed; not like any other woman he had ever met. He could call her pretty and charming, he found her a little too feminine, a little too playful, and it was as if most of the time she was acting. It was only sometimes when the things didn't go her way, when it was his turn to make something unexpected and startle her , the maiden finally showed her true nature. It was nice to see her blushing and surprised face, but even considering all that most of the time spent around her was hell. He was brought back from his thoughts by a sweet voice.
"Undertaker, dear. Can you please hold this for me?" She sent him a smile and handed the bag, packed to the brim with clothes.
It was still a couple hours past noon and the Undertaker was already very doubtful if he would be able to live through the day. After a few more hours of restless shopping the maiden seemed to calm down and finally, oh finally, decided to have lunch (though much later then its proper time the Undertaker was in no position to complain).
Sitting in a little café along one of the busy streets of London, the Undertaker found that he could get some rest and have a cup of hot, overly sweet black tea, while watching the elegant maiden devouring one piece of strawberry cake after another. Assuming she was in a good mood, the coffin maker decided it was a good time to ask a question that had been bothering him for quiet a long time.
"My Lady," he started carefully. "For how long are you going to use my services today?"
"Well…The deal was for me to use you for a day…" The woman batted her long eyelashes innocently and the Undertaker realized she had something devious in mind for him. "So, I suppose you belong to me until 11 o'clock tomorrow morning since it's the exact time we met today…" she trailed off, looking positively ecstatic.
She's a devil. The Undertaker thought, though the next minute her tone softened and she continued.
"But I'll have some mercy on you, sweetheart. 'Till midnight will be good enough for me."
This was definitely hell, a pink coloured one.
*****
Grell smiled at the stunned man. He just couldn't take his eyes from the Undertaker sitting at the table across from him. Grell's idol belonged to him, not for long-- but still it was a pure happiness.
"Is there anything else you would like to do today, my Lady?"
Oh, so careful and tactful! Grell beamed. No wonder I've chosen him.
"Thank you, I've bought everything I needed."
The Undertaker's eyes sparkled and he sighed in relief, hoping they could do something less awful then shopping.
"Though…"
The Undertaker's breath hitched as he waited for the maiden to continue.
"You know…I'd like to buy a pet."
"A pet, my Lady?"
"Yes! A cat, a dog maybe. Do you know of any good pet shops in London?"
"I remember one of my clients mentioned something about a pet shop. I believe she said her father was eaten by one of the pets."
"Oh, that's wonderful!" Grell's smile widened. "Where is this shop?"
"If I remember correctly it's somewhere in the Chinese district."
"Good then. It's our next destination."
*****
A dark narrow street was overcrowded with people in Chinese attire. A dark, heavy smell of incense filled the evening air, lamp lights that have just been lit and mixing with whole atmosphere of the place made the Chinese district look mysterious and maybe even dangerous. Grell loved it.
The pair stopped in front of a little shop with stairs going down and a sign "Count D" hanging above the entrance.
"I believe that's the place you need, my Lady." The Undertaker commented politely. He dreaded going inside, the whole atmosphere was exiting and frightening at the same time. After hearing so many rumors about the shop he finally got a chance to visit it, to know if everything that was said about it was true. The grey haired man stepped first down the dark stairs and helped the lady. Grell took the offered hand gratefully; it was very uncomfortable to move in the narrow dress he was wearing.
The wooden doors opened before them and a pair stepped inside. Grell smelled the sweet scent quickly, it was too heavy but still he couldn't find it unpleasant, on the contrary the smell of burning incense was relaxing to him. The room was large, dimly lit with a lot of candles on the little table in the corner and some shelves near the brightly decorated walls. The first things that caught his eyes were several wooden and metal cages with beautiful birds locked inside. What struck Grell as odd was the fact that all of them kept absolutely silent, and there was no noise except the tickling of a large grandfather clock.
The Undertaker also looked around taking in a velvet sofa and a table, to which the maiden didn't pay any attention.
"May I help you with something, dear clients?" A soft quiet voice was heard and the pair turned to see a young Chinese man in a changshan with embroidered golden and red dragons, straight black hair reached his shoulders.
"Are you count D?" The Undertaker asked.
The man kept silent, with a charming smile plastered on his handsome face he took a step closer and they were able to make out his accurate features with multi colored eyes, one golden and one a deep purple, and the two didn't miss his pale skin, which stood out almost as much as his eyes did.
"So, are you count D?" Grell repeated the question when he came to a conclusion that the silence had lasted for too long.
"No." The man answered. "I'm his grandfather."
For a moment Grell stopped to think Grandfather? Isn't he too young for that? but he quickly brushed that though away, finding the situation at hand much more interesting.
"I look after the shop in his absence."
"Good then, the Lady wanted to buy a pet."
The young man smiled mischievously and answered in that soft tone he seemed to prefer using when talking to is clients:
"Then you've came to the right place. I've got something that will be perfect for you."
"Oh, that's so nice of you!" Grell almost positively squealed out.
"Follow me. I'm sure you'll like it."
With a wide smile the maiden did as she was told, the Undertaker wanted to follow them but was stopped by a polite request from the owner of the pet shop.
"I'm sorry, but it's very important for the future owners to meet their pets without any disturbance. I'll bring your precious lady back in one piece, I promise." He reassured him.
The words were calming, but the Undertaker didn't like how they sounded when they came from the man's suspiciously grinning mouth. Grell though didn't pay any attention to it, his mind stopped working after the words "your precious lady," giving way for his rich imagination.
*****
Grell walked down the long expensively decorated corridor with the owner of the pet shop leading the way few steps ahead. It seemed they were walking for a couple of minutes already but the shop didn't look that big from the outside, or more like the shinigami would claim it was tiny. They stopped in front of a large iron door, with a lot of chains and countless huge locks. By the time the owner opened the last one Grell was intrigued to no end.
"I'm sure you'll like this pet. It's just like you, my lady."
The way he said it, stressing the last word and if the strange glint in his multi-colored eyes meant anything, Grell shivered due to an unknown reason. It was like the mysterious man knew everything about Grell's true nature.
*****
The Undertaker paced the room restlessly waiting for the owner and the maiden to return. Quite a bit of time had passed since they went to the back rooms, too much time and the white haired shinigami was worried. He didn't like the way the Chinese man looked at the maiden, it was unnerving. The gaze of his mismatched eyes held something… The Undertaker couldn't place what was the emotion behind it, but the man was too suspicious to trust him. Still the shinigami could do nothing but wait.
Minutes passed and finally, the beautiful lady in pink and the Chinese man exited the door in the back of the room. The Undertaker sighed in relief and then noticed something the maiden was holding in her arms.
"Undertaker~" She chirped out happily, rushing over to him and shoving the creature right into the man's face. "Isn't it charming?"
The Undertaker stared at the fluffy ball before him. It was something resembling a dog, or maybe it was supposed to look like one; it's big black eyes, almost completely hidden by bright pink fur, could be even called cute, but large fangs which could be seen when the creature made strange noises, sounding like something between barks and mewls, were surprisingly threatening.
"It's a very…unusual pet, my Lady." He choked out and stepped away from that thing.
"I'm very happy you liked it." The owner commented with a polite bow. "Should we sign the contract then?"
"Sure we should!" The maiden agreed, she was obviously ecstatic about it, the Undertaker though didn't like what was happening at all, but yet again he could do nothing. He looked at the piece of parchment in her hands and three contract points:
1. Feed it with sweets seven times a day
2. Never mistake its gender!
3. Never ever under any circumstances lock it inside a coffin made of ten thousand year old aspen cut down on the third night after the full moon, with ten roses carved in the lid, upholstered with red silk weaved by three young unmarried sisters born on one day with two years difference, one blonde, one brunette and one redhead.
The maiden signed it without paying any attention to the rules at all.
"I hope you'll take proper care of it. But please keep it in your mind …if you do not adhere to each point of the contract then this store cannot be held responsible for the consequences. "
"Sure, sure! Of course I will!" The maiden assured him and they left the shop.
But the Undertaker's suffering wasn't over as the lady suddenly decided that it was absolutely necessary for her to by a new fan that would match wonderfully with her new pet. The same old fashioned form of torture that was shopping came crashing down on the shinigami, including carrying enormous bags and looking after the pink creature, which was supposedly a dog. When he finally got to his peaceful workshop he was exhausted and irritated.
"Undertaker, sweetheart, I've got one last task for you." The maiden cooed and the dark shinigami almost growled loudly. How can such a beautiful woman be so annoying?
"I've got some business to do. Please, dear, look after the dog for me."
And with that she was gone and the Undertaker could swear the dog-alike creature glared at him for the sigh he heaved.
*****
Grell was incredibly happy; he had got to spend a whole day with his beloved Undertaker!
Maybe it could even be called a date? The man decked out in pink thought happily. Oh, he's so sweet. I can't forget handsome and caring too. What I really wish that I could see would be him in his 'super shinigami' attire. Grell mused while he headed to where he had to meet William. Unfortunately the red haired shinigami still had his duties and no matter how much he wanted to throw all his enthusiasm into seducing his new beloved one, he still had a job to do. He found it so unfair!
My stupid work is getting in the way of my love life! Grell thought angrily as he neared the meeting place. Only then did he remember that he still was clad in a narrow pink dress. Oh no, I need to change…
With that, he rushed to the opposite direction making William mad at him yet again for waiting for another hour.
*****
The Undertaker sat on the one of the coffins, tired and annoyed, staring at one particular spot, which was the right corner of the room, where on a piece of bright red cloth was sleeping a strange creature with pink fur, which he still couldn't understand how in the world it could be called a dog. The coffin maker had nothing against animals, even that particular animal, but he couldn't help but think that the pink creature was strange. Even from few meters away, he could easily see the long fangs in its half opened jaws.
The Undertaker was sure there was something very wrong with the so-called dog. Only a half an hour had passed since the maiden had left, the thing was sleeping peacefully for all that time, but the coffin maker was not fooled.
He got up slowly and took a few steps towards it. Hesitantly the Undertaker reached his hand and lightly touched the colourful fur. Strangely, it was very soft and felt nicely beneath his large hand. He relaxed and thought that maybe it wouldn't be that difficult to deal with the creature.
"Hm, you can be sweet, girl." He mused aloud.
But then a low growl was heard and two large black eyes stared at him, obviously with malice. The Undertaker jerked his hand and backed away. The so-called dog stood up and, baring its long fangs, jumped at him. Quickly, with his shinigami skills on, he ducked away, caught it in the air and shoved into the nearest coffin, closing the lid. It was quiet and calm again. He sighed in relief.
That thing is pretty irritating.
And then…A sound of scratching echoed through the workplace. A muffled squeak, and then another growl, came from the closed coffin, becoming louder and louder until finally reaching its peak and mixing with the sound of an abrupt splintering noise. The lid of the coffin burst into tiny pieces, flying in the air and a scary-looking creature leapt from the inside.
Its fur had turned from its once gaudy pink to bloody red, already threatening looking fangs had grown longer and bright burning eyes stared at him with hatred. It was definitely a creature that fit his personal devil in pink, taking such a demonic quality to it.It stepped closer to him, claws clicking against the floor with every slow step. Being just like a predator hunting its prey, which probably the Undertaker was to it, the dog spawned from hell wasn't taking its eyes from his figure, waiting for the best moment to attack.
A second passed and it leaped at him. The shinigami managed to duck away, but the dog attacked again. For nearly an hour they fought against each other, the Undertaker sometimes hitting his enemy, but mostly he just tried to avoid getting bitten. His work place was turned into a complete pandemonium, hell and chaos connecting and spreading throughout the place. Coffins were scratched, pieces of red and black silk clothes lying all over the place. The Undertaker wailed in disappointment, he was ready to rip the little thing apart. The only thing stopping him was the promise of the beautiful maiden's wrath, torments bringing eternal suffering. But when the pink fluffball dog of doom jumped up and bit fingers of his right hand the Undertaker made up his mind. That was it! He was going to kill the annoying creature.
*****
Grell dragged himself down the narrow road leading to "The Undertaker's". William made him catch up with all the work the red haired shinigami missed while drowning in his sorrows and looking for a new sweetheart. He was exhausted, barely had any powers to change from his normal shinigami clothes into beautiful black dress with red strips and wash blood from his face and hands. He wanted to see the Undertaker so much and maybe play with his new adorable dog. Oh, he already loved the little cute creature! While being on a mission Grell even thought about a good name for it. When he finally reached the place he tentatively knocked on the door before pushing it with a full strength. The sight that greeted him though made Grell freeze on the threshold.
There was an awful mess everywhere, splinters of glass and pieces of wood lying on the floor, covering furniture and even the highest shelves of the cupboard. In the very middle stood the Undertaker, his long fringe thrown back revealing angry face and eyes shining with fury, in his right arm lifted above his head a big silver knife glinted. Before him the pink dog, which strangely wasn't pink anymore, stood with its fangs bared and crazy eyes imitating the Undertaker's.
Grell's reaction was immediate. Even before the Undertaker acknowledged his presence the man in a dress had already rushed inside and took the pink dog in his arms, hugging it in to his chest protectively. The look of anger disappeared from the grey haired shinigami's face, replaced by confusion.
"My Lady?"
Grell glared at the man, but found himself unable to stay angry for long, charmed by those dark eyes of the Undertaker, which were not concealed by the long hair as always.
"Did you hurt my sweety?" Grell asked pouting and kissed the head of the now absolutely calm dog.
"But, my Lady…this--this…thing almost destroyed my house!" He actually stuttered out in suppressed anger.
"My little puppy can do no such thing. Look how cute and nice he is."
"But it's…Wait a minute! It's male?"
"Of course it is!" shouted Grell as if stating the most obvious thing in the world.
The Undertaker stared at the pink fluffy thing sited comfortably in the maiden's arms. It did not look like a male for him, or maybe he was loosing his senses?
"Fine. I'll forgive you." The maiden said and despite more or less kind words her voice was cold.
"Huh?"
Forgive? I don't remember apologizing even…
"But…"
Oh, that's where the bad part starts.
Oh yes, that's the best part now! Grell thought happily before continuing.
"…you have to spend tomorrow with me too." He ended with a huge grin.
The Undertaker caught a glimpse of long sharp teeth, but the grin disappeared quickly, leaving the man to wonder if he had just imagined it. And then when his hearing caught up with his sight, making the Undertaker fully register what was said, he was too shocked to ponder on the matter. He sighed and, obeying his misfortune, breathed out a weak:
"Yes, my Lady."
"Oh, good. Then we'll go on a walk now and it will be enough for today."
Two men and a dog left "The Undertaker's," the poor coffin maker slowly, very slowly taking step by step after the cheery maiden, with the little pink dog on a bright pink lash.
"Oh, Slashy, don't run far away, sweety." The young woman cooed.
"Huh? Slashy?"
"Oh yes, it's a wonderful name, isn't it?"
I haven't heard anything more stupid in my life. Thought the Undertaker, but aloud he said:
"Wonderful indeed. Does it have any…um…meaning?"
"Oh yes, it does! I new you'd understand! Well, actual the full name is Sir Lancelot Arthur of Scottish Highlands; in short – Slash and in cute – Slashy."
Horrified, the Undertaker stared at the little pink dog-like creature and came to a conclusion that he had never seen something scarier in his long life, considering he was one of the strongest shinigamis. Meanwhile the maiden grabbed his hand and led them both to the nearest park.
"I knew you'd like it!"
"Huh?"
Like it? Never! But he never voiced the protest and not because he was afraid of some strange pink-lover. Definitely not!
After a half an hour of the walk the Undertaker had finally relaxed and even started considering it nice. That did not last long though, because when they exited the park through the main gates and turned to the narrow dark street of London, he noticed something quite unexpectedly.
"Oh, isn't that a clown lying over there with his face in the dirt?" Grell asked amused.
The Undertaker walked closer to the figure, it was a clown indeed, lying on his stomach so that the pair wasn't able to see his face. The grey haired shinigami carefully turned the body over with the tip of his shoe. When the light of the nearest lamp lit up the face of the man, the pair gasped. Despite all the white powder his face was all red, dark purple markings in the shape of a line circled his throat. Blood dripped from his mouth and mixed with the crimson liquid covering the area around his orange-wigged head. The streamer covered almost all the free space on the little street. His brightly coloured clothes were ripped as if he was fighting with someone…but judging by the fact that he was not breathing and all parts f his body not covered by the distasteful costume started showing the symptoms of rotting which obviously indicated he was very much and very long dead, the clown probably was fighting. Unsuccessful as they considered all of the facts. What disappointed Grell the most though was the fact that some other shinigami had already taken his pitiful soul.
The Undertaker bent down to take a strange object from the dead man's mouth.
"Hm…What's that?" Grell asked with interest.
"It looks like a –"
But he didn't have a chance to finish his sentence because at that minute several people in police uniforms flooded the street, screaming loudly and pointing their guns on the Undertaker.
"Take him! He's the mass murderer!"
"Madam, please stay away from him!"
They shouted simultaneously, over screaming Grell's protest "Hey, I'm mademoiselle!" and making impossible to understand what they were actually meaning. Only when a man in a dark brown coat appeared and calmed them down the maiden managed to comprehend what was happening. Suddenly he felt worried for the fist time since he had met the other shinigami. He knew whatever it was going on, must be serious. It could mean trouble for both of them and especially for the Undertaker.
"Sir," the man, who seemed to be the boss, turned to the grey haired shinigami. "You are suspected in the serial slaying of clowns that have been happening in London."
A/N: That's all for now. We hope you liked it. And we definitely need reviews! As many as possible!!!:)
Oh, and was the mixing a character from the other fandom in this story good? The Count isn't going to appear anymore, though.
HiM'e'iTSu: Oh, and read my other stories, maybe you'll like them:)