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First Comes the Night
Chapter 2
Something was wrong.
Rey was mid-performance, demonstrating with Anakin's saber what she'd done to survive Starkiller Base as Luke had requested, when she sensed his displeasure. She twirled around to face him, already mirroring the frown that worried his features.
"What did I do?" she asked, breathless and confused. He looked away from her quickly, as though caught hiding a shameful secret.
It was her first day of training and she'd sought to impress him, eager to show him the methods she'd already employed against Ben. Disappointment bent her shoulders, as it already seemed nothing she did could please Luke.
The day was overcast and cool. The breeze that drew up from the ocean ran its touch over her smoothly, but clawed madly at Luke's robes, whipping the hem away from her as though limbs flailing in terror. When he didn't respond an unease began to germinate within her. "Have I done something wrong?" she repeated.
Luke returned his gaze to her. She'd just performed a variation of Djem So and Shii-Cho, with a few elements of Juyo also interspersed within her clumsy demonstration. It wasn't possible she knew so many of their techniques by mirroring Ben's fighting style alone. More troubling to Luke was the fact his preferred fighting stance was deeply ingrained within hers. Even her flourish was reminiscent of his.
"Last night, at dinner, you said you were completely untrained." He sounded almost accusatory.
"I am, at least, I've never been formally trained. I only know what the Force gave me."
"The Force doesn't train abilities, which is the reason I've spent my life gathering as much information as I could from lost Jedi temples and archives." Luke paused. "Until all I'd gathered was destroyed," he added bitterly.
He collected himself, returning his attention to Rey. "Think back. What were you doing when you first acquired knowledge of these skills?"
Rey concentrated, thinking back to the day she'd been taken hostage. She wasn't entirely certain what had happened herself. "I don't know… I was trying to resist his mind probe to get the map to you. At first I couldn't resist, but then," she dropped off lamely, trying to pinpoint what had changed, and when. "Then I focused on him, and I wanted to push back, so I did…"
"What else?" he pressed.
"Then he left the cell and I ordered the guard to release me, and he did—"
"He what?" Luke interrupted.
Rey hesitated, not knowing what she'd done wrong, or how else she was to explain what had happened. Luke's study of her had changed, as though he was no longer looking at her, but into her. She shifted on her feet, nervous and slightly afraid.
He walked to an arm's length away from her and reached out his hand. She shrunk back at the contact, not sure what to expect. Then she felt it, an unwelcome entry into her mind, and instinctually resisted.
"No," Luke commanded. "Let me see. There's no pain if you don't resist."
She hesitated before obeying him, as memory of an unpleasant, recent past washed over her. She took a deep breath and consciously relaxed her mind and body. The tiny scalpels that had begun to flick at the edges of her mind disappeared.
Luke eased into her mind, edging in slowly as she adjusted to his presence. She let down all the barriers, one by one, that she'd been building up since that day on Starkiller Base. Once he had fully entered, he soon found what he was looking for. His jaw twitched in dismay when Ben corporalized within her mind, but he kept his touches, both physical and mental, as gentle as he could upon the girl. He remained motionless for several minutes, going over their first meeting, what had occurred in the interrogation room, the final fight, and her memories of Han as he stood before Ben. The flux of emotions that had churned like an electric current from Ben through Rey as he confronted his father, and faced her in the forest, were completely unexpected.
Then he sensed it, a presence he'd once loved as his own son. Luke opened his eyes surprise and fear. He stepped back, assessing her anew. It was evident she'd felt his presence too, shock evident on her face.
Perhaps…He began, but didn't allow himself to finish the thought. "Can you still sense him?" Luke demanded hoarsely, his voice thick with repressed emotions.
'Yes," she cried, her voice rising in fear. She stepped back herself, uncertain of what to do, what to feel, and how to close him out.
"Rebuild your mental barriers. Take each memory and build a wall around it. Shut him back out." His voice was stronger, but it was clear his resolve was shaken. He watched as she closed her eyes, trying to relax herself once more. He took a deep breath and spoke again, encouraging her more softly. "Good. Put each memory from your mind and close them in."
When she opened her eyes once more she was no less agitated at what had just transpired, but he sensed relief washing over her.
"What was that?" she asked, shaken to the core.
"A Force bond," he whispered, more to himself than to her.
"What does that mean?" Rey pressed. She was afraid of this, afraid of the draw she'd felt towards him, afraid that she'd never be able to shake the monster that pursued her, and afraid of why she'd attracted its attention. No, perhaps not a monster, she thought, but that made the implications of what just happened no less terrifying.
Luke took Rey by the arm and led her to a grassy patch nearby. He sat, and she followed suit, facing him. He tucked down his flailing hems, pushing them beneath his knees.
"When you first arrived I'd sensed something was off. Something different, but I wasn't certain what it was. Now, I understand-"
"You think I'm tainted with the dark side now, don't you? That I can't be helped?" Rey interrupted, as tears pooled in her eyes.
"No, nothing like that," Luke stressed, "Your Force energies are tied together. You can feel what he does, and he can feel what you do, provided that you're both open to each other. I don't want you to be afraid, but this is dangerous. He can find where you are through your bond alone. You must keep your barriers up at all times."
At that, her tears fell. The barriers were easy enough, she'd kept them since she'd escaped him. Yet now she felt hopeless, forever hunted, and never again to be truly free. "Can't we stop it?"
"If one of you dies," he supplied darkly, watching her reaction intently.
She stopped crying, breathed evenly through her mouth, and considered what he'd said. Connected forever,she thought. But I couldn't kill him, and he doesn't want to kill me. I know it.
"Why?" she asked, looking up into the clear blue eyes beneath his gray brow.
"You know why."
Rey imagined she was meant to feel some sort of hatred, or some fear that would compel her to the heights of emotion necessary to commit murder, but she felt neither.
"No," she said simply. She'd expected a reprimand, some fault found with her reasoning or easy decision, but she received none. Against her expectations, his gaze softened towards her.
Memories of his father had risen into the forefront of Luke's mind. He remembered feelings the conflict within Vader, and his own certainty that such a conflict was all that was needed to turn his father from darkness. That is, until Ben showed him the depths of his own ignorance- That inner conflict was the very thing that pushed his father to the dark side. He'd watched idly as his own nephew struggled with the same pain. Luke closed his eyes, ashamed.
But if Rey, hunted and frightened, could retain her humanity amid the danger? Then all was not lost. It was as though a new and unexpected dimension of the girl had just revealed itself to him. His breathing deepened, matching hers. He didn't entirely believe what he was about to say, but Obi Wan Kenobi had risen, unbidden, into his thoughts. Trusting Kenobi, and all that he stood for, Luke spoke.
"Listen to me very carefully, Rey. As long as you trust your instinct, you will do the right thing. Always listen to it. The Force is your ally, and it will never lead you astray. It lacks ambition, hate and fear. It yields no forgiveness because it lacks the lust for revenge. No matter where you find yourself, or how you find yourself, you can always trust it to guide you, should you need it."
He got up and left her then, to sit with her own thoughts. But his reason to leave her was more than that. He needed to be alone to inspect his own heart. His spirit, and his life's work, had both been shattered with the birth of Kylo Ren. It had been many years since he'd felt true inner peace, but something fractured inside of him had begun humming when he'd seen, and felt, Ben through the girl. He felt the gentle hum nudging tiny shards of his soul back into place. This time, he dared to think it. Perhaps Yoda is right, that if I cannot trust the Force, I can trust the girl.
And he did learn to trust her over the next few weeks that they spent in each other's company, as they trained basic skills and learned from each other. The day she'd felt and feared her bond with Ben seemed to have faded from her memory as well. She blossomed under the influence of his and Chewie's presence, relishing their acceptance of her as a child relishes the attentions of its mother.
Her youthful exuberance was as intoxicating as it was infectious. He'd found his own bitterness slowly fading as the weeks went on. She was as naturally warm and inviting as sunshine, and he responded just as everyone else that came into contact with her did, as moths drawn to her flame.
...
Kylo Ren was abandoned.
Upon orders from the Supreme Leader, A'den had left Kylo on a molten planet on the outer rim. It was uninhabited except for the predatory beasts that skulked in the shadows, waiting for him to perish. It had only been two days since his abandonment here, but the world was sweltering and he was soon dehydrated. Left without water, he'd wandered alone, broken, defenseless, and dying. This was the final installment of his training, and it was destroying him from the inside out.
Not even meditation could clear away the keen pain that starvation and dehydration were wreaking on his body. It couldn't shut out the devastation he'd caused, or by nature of involvement, allowed to happen. So I am the creature she sees, he thought. He grimaced, a feral grin distorting his features. He'd relive it all again then. He deserved it.
In his mind, he'd killed his father hundreds of times. A soldier at war, he'd killed hundreds of people in his lifetime. But in his mind, he killed these hundreds of beings thousands of times over. Leia, he thought, his mother's image rose in his mind to torment him. He'd killed her too, he knew. The day on the bridge when Kylo stole from her the only man she'd ever truly loved. He tensed and kicked out, growling in anger and refusing to acknowledge the truth. He reminded himself that he was darkness, remorseless, and that he didn't care.
And yet, the pain remained. A hard little gem of light that refused to die. That he couldn't kill no matter how hard he tried. Because of this, he was going to fail before his training was complete, or die before he had the chance to be rejected. He'd suspected this from the start.
Kylo Ren laughed. A mirthless, hacking sound.
He laid his body down on the obsidian and stretched his arms wide, baring his heart for consumption or decay, whichever release came first. Now, nothing could distract him from his dark thoughts, not even the girl.
"Rey," he breathed, reaching out. But she didn't hear him. She didn't answer. It had been him the entire time. Him alone. My vision was a lie, he thought bitterly. Yet, it was with the last vestiges of his tenderness that he pushed her from his heart.
"Grandfather," Kylo rasped in desperation. "Help me, please. Give me strength."
When he heard no response, received no sign that his grandfather had heard his plea, he sobbed. No tears came as he choked on the dry ash, for the suffocating heat of the planet had withered his tears days before.
The helplessness he'd always felt throve within his chest. And anger, in response, simmered in his heart. It soon boiled over into pure rage. Black and pure, and as heavy as the weight that pressed upon his ribs. The weight of death as it inched towards him. Something within him snapped. He'd reached it: The breaking point. He went cold, and in his rage he rose from the ground, a black flame.
Kylo pulled back his shoulders defiantly and sucked in the breaths that death would dare steal from him. Full of air, rage, death, and desperation, he roared into the silence. Splaying his hands wide once again, he brought them together, and his roar of rage culminated with an awesome spectacle of power.
Black lightning, punctuated by streaks of deep purple, exploded from his open fists and into the mountain of obsidian in front of him. The black electricity licked at its jagged edges, then penetrated the mountain to its core. As his roar reached its highest peak, the mountain relented, exploding into a cascade of dust.
He released his power, his lips trembling from the sheer immensity of it. With his chest still heaving from the effort to breathe, Kylo Ren looked down at his hands. The black leather of his gloves concealed the pink of his palms beneath. He shook his head. "There is no conflict." At this admission, a small light on his belt caught his eye.
A'den would be there shortly to collect him. He laughed again, only this time it was true, and loud, and full of the shards that pain and loss had detonated within him. The sound resonated around the dead planet, penetrating every valley, as deep and long as the rage he felt.
His ire had burned so fierce and for so long that he'd become accustomed to its constant presence. Yet now, Kylo Ren was a flaming pyre of it; completely consumed. He was purified within its flames and born anew.
The calm was an illusion, he knew. He was a winter cyclone, beautiful and lethal- burgeoning with immense power; held steady by the hollow at its center.
He stood within the calm center of his own emotion, blissfully free from the pain that had always ruled him. He was cool, aloof, and pure malice.
The black grit of the planet had settled into the raw gouge in his face, an ashen dagger slashing his visage. He hid it, along with the void behind his eyes, under his helm. He ignited his lightsaber, angling it before him and admiring the deep red of its fiery blade. He stood with it crackling at his side and patiently awaited his flight.
...
The Supreme Leader was extremely pleased with him. Kylo had now earned his full trust, and had been awarded substantially. Being that it was no longer necessary to track him, Kylo's loyalties no longer in question, Snoke removed his locator. He gave him free rein, such as the other Knights of Ren already enjoyed. He was free to roam where he pleased, locate any artifacts he pleased, and pursue any endeavors he pleased. So long as Kylo, and the Knights of Ren, came to the service of the Supreme Leader at his bidding, he was free to act in the interests of the First Order of his own volition.
Kylo Ren, strangely devoid of any sense of satisfaction, bowed at his master's feet and accepted this generous gift. He left the Finalizer in the care of Hux. Although Kylo felt no love for the man, he knew him capable of defending the vessel in his absence.
Kylo boarded his private craft and made his way to the secret keep of the Knights of Ren, a fortress hidden away in the unknown regions, in a location not even the Supreme Leader had knowledge of. The furious storm that roiled beneath his surface hadn't dimmed, yet he continued to feel no symptom of it. He sat motionless beneath his mask on the journey, quietly reflecting on the past few days.
I've waited years for this. I expected a sense of pride or relief at finally achieving this honor, and yet I feel absolutely nothing. If the Supreme Leader could sense my indifference, he gave no indication that it disturbed him. In fact, it seemed to have brought him great satisfaction that I had none.
He opened and closed his fists reflexively, closing his eyes beneath the dark, perpetual stare of his mask.
Perhaps because he knew that once I'd faced complete decimation, that I'd have no further distraction. That if fury scoured away all compassion, I'd no longer be swayed by it. And once I'd accepted my imminent death, I'd no longer fear it.
If there had once been a time when Kylo Ren had felt alive, he no longer recalled it. He felt as cold and indifferent as the void of space surrounding him on all sides.
They neared the keep, an installation created long ago by Darth Vader for his finest apprentice, A'den. And this dark apprentice guarded his palace jealously. No one, except for the Knights themselves, their pilots, and a small lifelong staff, knew of its location.
And it was here, late on the first night of his arrival that Kylo had awoken with a start. Shaken and wary at the sudden intrusion of his mind, he'd braced himself to be overtaken by a vision.
Yet, no vision came. No, something much more unexpected pervaded his senses- He could feel her. The constant storm within him shifted, almost imperceptibly. "Rey," he whispered once again, letting her name trail off with his breath.
He focused his sight outside the window of his room, searching the galaxy for her. Twin lights, reflected from the universe itself, shone from within the depths of his eyes.
I'm coming for you, he projected into the night sky, then paused. He reflected on why he still felt compelled to find this girl. Haven't I destroyed the hope I'd held in her discovery, along the last vestiges of compassion that she'd awakened, mere hours ago? I am beyond these frailties now. He pushed the thoughts from his mind, deciding not to dwell on whether his compulsion to find her was based solely on accomplishing his goals or… something more. It didn't matter, as she'd shut him out once again, her presence gone as quickly as it had come. He sat in the quiet, expecting something akin to anger or disappointment to overcome him, as they always had before. It never came. Instead he was filled with intent, and on a level he'd never known before.
He rose from his bed, a flickering black flame, and left his chambers. He needed to know what advancements A'den had made in his pursuit of the girl while he was away.
Over the following weeks he began to understand that his visions hadn't been as deceitful as he'd perceived, for these weeks would prove highly productive in bringing him that much closer to obtaining his goal. One that A'den had pursued as well upon hearing of Kylo's vision. With a growing certainty he knew that their plan would succeed; that the New Jedi would not become a weapon of the Resistance, but theirs. And theirs alone.