A/N: New Moon, its characters, and its occurrences all belong to Stephenie Meyer.
Chapter 1- Celebration
I don't know what I thought of today. A small part of my heart was wrenched with grief at the thought that one day, one day my Bella would be gone. But as long as I was around to protect her from the danger she usually (albeit unintentionally) brought upon herself, we'd have decades together before that was even a thought. Of course, knowing that I would not be the one to silence her heart was an overwhelming comfort. Once and again I would see the flash of steel in her gaze as she would attempt to discuss her desire for immortality with me, but on this I wouldn't—couldn't—compromise. Her own life was not mine to take; the mere thought of it hurt to imagine. After the fiasco that was last spring, after knowing the sweet, hot rush of her blood filling my mouth, my vision, my very soul— Ah, but there was the catch. What soul? I had spent decades contemplating the idea in brief fancies of thought before reality crushed around me. With my unfailing memory, I could recall all too easily the faces of my prey as they saw my unstoppable form descend upon them, silencing the shrieks of terror their own victims would never voice. And why should she be so eager for this? I shook my head and glanced into my rear-view mirror to see her ancient vehicle slowly chug its way into the school yard. Alice gave a squeal of excitement, turned to grab a small silver box from the backseat, and was out of the car faster than humanly possible, literally.
I flashed her a warning glance. Calm down, I mouthed at her with a smile as I unfolded all six feet, two inches of my frame onto the damp asphalt. She stuck her tongue out at me with a decidedly childish grin on her pixie-like face, and danced over to Bella. My Bella. My Love. My heart, if it had any trace of the living, moving organ it had ever been, would have swollen to bursting with happiness at the mere sight of her face, despite the scowl that stamped there instead of the usual wide-eyed look of wonder she had around me. I chuckled to myself and leaned against the trunk as I watched Alice's irrepressible enthusiasm trap Bella like a net. All this fuss over Bella's birthday would only end in trouble for Alice, but she was like a hurricane of joy—all you could do was brace yourself and wait it out.
I could hear their conversation from where I stood—vampire senses being what they are—Alice's exclamations and Bella's protesting murmurs. I knew they'd reach me soon, and stood up straight from my stance against the car with a deep, cautious breath of cool, misty air combined with the intoxicating fragrance that was Bella Swan. I was still developing coping skills to the tongues of fire the flicked at my lungs each time I inhaled when she was nearby, but I was pleased to find out the black monster of thirst hadn't uttered so much as a sullen rumble over the past few months.
Almost of its own volition, my hand stretched out to reach for her. She clung to it immediately and a look of relief mixed with that ever-present wonder flashed briefly in her eyes. Gently, softly, I compressed my hand around hers and she squeezed back with enthusiasm. Her heart actually skipped a beat, and I smiled into her eyes. In my own sense of wonder I lifted my other hand, allowing my finger to trace the outline of her full, beautiful mouth. My eyes still on her lips, I asked—for clarification—"Now, like we've talked about, I am forbidden from telling you 'Happy Birthday," is that accurate?"
Still with that inexplicable sense of wonder on her face she replied in the affirmative with more my sort of diction than hers. It felt almost as if she were repeating words after a hypnotist. I gave a slight smile and nodded.
"Very well, just making sure," I teased. In half-exasperation, half-habit, I brought my hand from her mouth to my hair, no doubt tousling it into even more disarray. "Because there was always a chance you might have decided otherwise. If I recall, the majority of humans usually like special occasions and presents."
Alice laughed, whether at my words or at Bella's expression I couldn't be sure. Her mind implied it was both as she coyly glanced at me. "Oh, she'll like it. Everybody is expected to treat you nicely today and obey your every whim. What tragedy could possibly happen?" she asked airily. Alice was being light; Bella's response was anything but.
"Aging." Her voice was barely above a whisper. I narrowed my eyes slightly and tried to keep my temper in check. We'd been through this and through this, and—despite how stubborn she was—I knew in the end she would see it for what it really was: clinging to an idealistic idea of the glory of eternity. I snorted to myself but Alice's cheerful reply saved me from opening my mouth to start a pointless argument.
"You're only just eighteen, and that's not really old. Aren't most women twenty-nine before they start worrying about aging?"
"Eighteen is older than Edward," Bella replied morosely, and her eyes flicked up to meet mine.
"Well, if you're going to get technical about it, but it's only one teensy year's difference!" Alice chirped.
But Bella was sulking. I groaned inwardly at her foolish desire to have me end her life for her. I'd seen her relationship with her father—did she really want to end that? I knew she wasn't particularly close to anyone at school, but Angela was no doubt one of her closer comrades—was she truly willing to sacrifice those ties? Her life, for me? Surely I alone—no, not even my family—wasn't worth cutting her connection to the world she was a part of before I had impaled her with my existence. I winced at the imbalance of the whole situation. Yet she continued to plead, usually more with a look than with directly, verbally insisting on this choice for her future, and I continued to remain steadfast against even entertaining the idea.
An impasse, truly.
Alice's voice broke through my moody reverie as she artfully attempted to change the subject.
"So… when will you be coming over?" The gleam in Alice's eye betrayed any attempt at secrecy for the party she had planned for Bella.
"I was unaware I was supposed to come over," Bella shot back.
"Oh, come on Bella!" Alice pleaded. "You can't seriously be telling me you're just going to spoil our fun tonight, can you?"
"Alice, I thought today would be about my wishes," Bella sighed.
I needed to put a stop to this before it turned into either Alice wilting with disappointment or Bella crying with frustration. Loving them both as I did, I interrupted, "I'll pick her up from her house as soon as school is out."
Bella's voice was a mix of protest and desperate hope. "I'm working tonight!"
"No you're not," Alice triumphed. "I called Mrs. Newton earlier and she traded your shift—with happy birthday wishes!"
Bella looked flustered. I was momentarily distracted by the red flush slowly creeping up her cheeks as she frantically tried to come up with some excuse about needing to see "Romeo and Juliet." I rolled my eyes at her and Alice took the words right out of my mouth. Or rather, my head… her psychic abilities were as irritating as they were useful, sometimes.
"You've already seen Romeo & Juliet enough to recite it!"
"I have not seen the 1968 film! And Mr. Berty told us that version is the best one!"
Alice's patience was wearing thin. "Bella, I can make this easy, or I can make this difficult, but in the end—"
I could see this dissolving into exactly the fiasco I had intended to avoid. I broke into Alice's near threat with what I thought would be the best compromise. "Alice, calm down. If she wants to see this film, then she shall. It is her birthday, remember?"
"Yeah!" Bella chimed in.
I smiled at her juvenile antics and continued, "I'll just bring her over sometime after seven, which will also give you a chance to get things more prepared."
Alice seemed to be the only one pleased with my decision. "Alright! That sounds perfect. I'll see you later Bella. And it will be a blast, just wait!" She flashed a deflated Bella a perfect smile and gave her a quick kiss before bounding away towards the school building.
"Please Edward, just— " Bella started to protest but I silenced her with a finger against her warm, parted lips. The tingle that rushed from that brief contact momentarily distracted me, but I focused on what needed to be said.
"Bella, love, we'll talk about it later. Come on, if we don't get going we'll be late."
She bit her lip in resignation but I could tell what she was thinking, even with her mind so silent to my ability to determine the thoughts of anyone around me. The depth of her chocolate brown eyes revealed she wouldn't mind too much if we skipped class together, but I sighed and set my shoulders with determination as I held her hand on our way to class.
As the school day wore on, I pointedly ignored all stray thoughts of desire toward this most desirable creature, as well as the mental daggers of malice that were aimed at me when she wasn't looking. I had to give the Newton boy credit; his attitude towards Bella now seemed to be a sort of wistful resignation rather than the outright lust his thoughts had first been stained with. I gave him a friendly yet cautious smile. I was resolute on making this day as comfortable as possible for Bella. If I could, I would have given her anything that struck even the faintest edges of her fancy. I wanted to give her the world, to give her anything, because I knew she couldn't have the eternal life she so foolishly thought she wanted. She seemed intent on refusing any gifts from me, even any thoughts of gifts from me, and I couldn't understand why. Money was something we Cullens didn't give too much thought, and now that I finally had the one person in my life for whom I wished to use it, she seemed uninterested to the point of distaste. But if she was truly content with settling for my arms around her shoulders, my lips against her creamy skin, and my fingers intertwined with hers, then I'd give as much of myself as I could—within reason.
Physical love was a difficult matter for us… I was all too aware that with the merest twitch, I could likely crack one of her delicate bones. And given the vampiric tendency to deign completely into physical sensory reception once that "switch" was thrown, I knew to draw the line before things got too unbearable. My desire for her body was just ahead of my desire for her blood. And both were far, far behind the inescapable visions of her in a broken, mangled, bloody mess if I were to foolishly allow desire to overthrow reason and restraint.
I shuddered now as that mental image wisped through my mind while we worked our way to the cafeteria. I'd been careful to neither mention her birthday nor allow Alice to bring it up. We sat at our usual table, joined by Mike and the fickle Jessica Stanley, as well as Bella's genuine friend Angela and her boyfriend Ben. A few others- Eric, Tyler, Conner, and the insufferable Lauren Mallory were also at the table, but they—especially Lauren—weren't exactly what Bella or I considered "friends". Usually there was an almost tangible barrier between our group and the latter, but Bella had informed me that they tended to be much more amiable on the rare sunny days when Alice and I avoided all public places. And with the absence of my "siblings" Rosalie, Emmett, and Jasper, things were definitely friendlier than they had been compared to the previous years we'd suffered through the purgatory of what had once been yet another high school in a small, cloudy town. Bella had brought me out of the blackest midnight into a world I didn't even know could exist, despite the evidence of love all around me in Carlisle's devoted gaze at Esme, Emmett's worshipful awe of Rosalie, and Jasper's sacred, quiet care of Alice, my favorite "sister". I could tell that even being without him for just the course of a school day was agony for Alice, but she was at the moment occupied with plans for Bella's birthday this evening. My eyes lingered on her in a gaze that was half affection, half patient tolerance.
I know you're thinking about me, Alice eyed me meaningfully. Don't get any ideas. I'm going through with this one hundred percent. And she'll love it, I know she will! Her thoughts ended in almost a plea for understanding.
I sighed so quietly no one else took notice, and glanced pointedly at Bella while shaking my head infinitesimally. I knew Alice's unstoppable joy would clash with Bella's eternal discomfort with any sort of attention. "She won't like it," I murmured below the depths of normal human decibel perception.
Alice merely "Hmph'd" in disdain and thought towards me, You have no idea how much fun this is going to be for all of us. Think about it. When was the last time any of us really celebrated a birthday?
I set my lips as I thought of the "party" we'd had in 1935 for Emmett, and I could tell Alice was aware of my perfect recollection.
This will be so much better than that! she mentally squealed. And then—a flash—something? Blood? Bella, on the ground! Alice shook her head as a dim essence of a vision filled her mind and then was gone before it could fully register. Nearby, someone dropped a lunch tray and the clang was met with a round of applause.
"What was that?" I asked in a strained tone.
Mistaking my question as a query for what had just occurred, Angela and Bella both answered, "Connor dropped his tray." Angela and Bella smiled at each other, and Ben cried "Jinx!" but Bella's eyes held a question. I patted her hand reassuringly, and she turned back to laughing with Angela as Alice thoughtfully trained her mental discourse towards me.
I don't… know… Bella's going to trip? Or something… she huffed in exasperation. It always annoyed Alice when her vision wasn't totally clear. But I'll have plenty of band-aids on hand, just in case. She laid a pacifying hand on my arm and I glanced back at Bella. She'd missed the whole exchange.
After the final bell rang, I walked Bella through the familiar rain to the decrepit rust bucket she called a truck. I had yearned to get her something more remotely close to being categorized as "dependable," but she incessantly refused. I held her passenger door open for her and blinked as she just stood there dripping with her arms crossed. The anxiety of her catching a cold, as she would if she continued to stand in this downpour, was driven away by her voice.
"Shouldn't I be allowed to drive if it is my birthday?"
I let none of my concern or impatience show in my voice as I replied, "I'm following your desires by pretending that today is not your birthday."
"Well, if today isn't my birthday, then I shouldn't have to come over tonight," she countered.
"Very well." I was amused at her total desire to shift any sort of attention whatsoever away from her attention-deserving self. I just wanted her out of the rain, and I walked around to hold her driver's side door open, instead. "Happy birthday," I teased.
"Oh hush," she chastised me half-seriously.
As we made our way through the mist, my thoughts turned toward her party set for that evening. Regardless of how much she hated attention, I knew she'd be pleased by the presents my family had garnered for her. Thinking of her gifts reminded me of music, and I smiled to myself as I turned to her radio in what I knew would be a futile attempt to gain any sort of clear signal. When the best I could extract was a fuzzy country tune punctuated by random interruptions of even louder static, I shook my head in dismay.
"You know, the reception on your radio is terrible."
She frowned, a small line appearing between her perfect eyebrows. I could tell she was still brooding over the coming evening by the attitude in her voice. "If you want a good radio you should have driven your car!" she retorted.
Considering how rarely she was anything close to angry with me I couldn't help but be amused with her obvious anxieties about today. I pressed her hand to my lips gently and my nostrils flared briefly as I inhaled her sweet, intoxicating fragrance and held her, there, in my lungs. Regardless of what happened, tonight or otherwise, I knew I'd never forget this scent for the rest of my existence.
When we finally arrived at Chief Swan's house (Bella's ancient truck could barely wheeze along at anything beyond 50 miles an hour), I removed my hand from hers to bring my fingertips to her face, tracing over her delicate skin… So fragile… Thinking of how I knew I'd keep her scent with me forever suddenly me made me want to commit her very cells to my memory. It was odd, this fierce possession that devoured me so suddenly and without warning... It was all I could do to just barely let my fingers drift across the dull pulse in her temples, the fine structure of her cheekbones, the soft curve of her jaw… I couldn't bear to know she harbored even the slightest negativity on this day, especially when I knew how happy my family would be for a chance to celebrate with me for Bella. Well, I mentally amended, all except for Rosalie…
I said softly, "Oh Bella… today, of all days, I'd expect that you would be happy…" My eyes closed as I inhaled her essence, letting it wash over my face, breathing in Bella.
She in turn was inhaling and exhaling hesitant, quivering breaths as she replied shakily, "What… What if… I just don't want to be happy?" Her attempt at sounding like a petulant child was foiled by the desire that was laced in her voice, and I knew it. And she knew I knew it.
Calling her bluff, I stared deeply into those fathomless brown eyes and breathed, "Well, that's a shame…" before I lowered my lips gently to hers and allowed myself the delightful indulgence of her mouth against mine. Almost unconsciously, she swiftly locked her arms behind my head and pulled me into her passion. I smiled to myself at her predictability, but gently untangled her grip from my body even though every cell in mine was screaming to bring her closer, closer than close, until I could feel that wet warmth from the inside out… But ah, my imagination was running away with me almost as shamelessly as hers was. With a plea of "Please… behave..." said softly against the softer skin of her face, I gave her one more brief kiss before crossing her arms against her torso gently.
I could literally hear her heart pounding in her chest, and, unbidden, memories of her sweet blood flooding my mouth made my mouth fill with venom in anticipation. But all it took was one look at her face as she brought her hand up to her heart and felt for herself how wildly it was thrumming.
She asked softly, reflectively, "Do you suppose this will ever get easier for me?"
I smiled as I tried to imagine my Bella without her adorable, constant palpitations or tell-tale blush. But then other images of her- cold, hard, and completely inhuman- brushed at the edges of my thoughts. I shook my head and that thought of her away and my smile returned. "I sincerely hope not," I replied.
She scowled and said in a huff of resignation, "Let's just go watch the Montagues and the Capulets butcher each other, okay?"
Still teasingly, I conceded, "Your wish is my command, my lady." And graciously I held the front door open as she stomped inside and dropped her bags onto the floor. Her irritated expression didn't last long, however, as she stopped in the process of removing her shoes. When I shut the door and strode over to plant a kiss on her temple, she melted into the smiling, charming Bella that had captured my heart.
I stretched myself out over the Swan's sofa as Bella knelt by the VCR to start the movie. Once she had fast-forwarded beyond the beginning titles, she sat in front of me and I pulled her into an embrace. The fragility and the warmth that exuded from her body only reminded me of how firm and freezing I must be to her, so I reluctantly called upon my sense of chivalry and covered her with the blanket that had been draped across the back of the couch. We settled in to watch the movie, but once the first line was delivered, it occurred to me just how irritating Romeo Montague was.
"I never did have much forbearance for Romeo," I mentioned offhandedly as the scenes played out before us on the screen. Bella seemed offended.
"Romeo? Why? What is wrong with one of the best-known fictional characters of all time?"
Braiding our fingers together I replied, "Well for starters, isn't he supposed to be in love with this Rosaline character? I think that seems a little fickle. Not to mention that moments after their wedding, he murders Juliet's cousin Tybalt, which isn't very smart. He makes error after error... Is he intentionally trying to destroy his own happiness?"
Bella gave a sigh of mock frustration. "Would you like me to watch this alone?"
"No," I admitted a tad huskily. "I'll be paying more attention to you, mostly." I untangled our fingers and brushed my hand along her arm, feeling the hairs rise one by one. I wasn't sure that was entirely due to my cold skin, and that pleased me.
A thought suddenly occurred to me. "Will you cry?" I asked.
"More than likely," she conceded. "That is, if I actually get to focus on the movie." Her voice held a teasing smile.
"By all means," I murmured into her hair. "I'll let you focus, then."
And so the afternoon slid by in a tragically romantic blur. From time to time I found myself caught up in the story, when I wasn't busy being distracted by listening to Bella's breath or heartbeat. I noticed with satisfaction how the rate of both would increase as I would murmur the occasional Romeo line to her… it was actually fairly easy, considering everything he said was something I found applicable to my own truest love… When I contemplated the way her eyes sparkled with anticipation of the deliverance of those lines, I couldn't help myself—
"O! She doth teach the torches to burn bright. It seems she hangs upon the cheek of night. Like a rich jewel in an Ethiop's ear; beauty too rich for use, for earth too dear."
Yet it was when Juliet delivered her oft-quoted line "What's in a name?" that I set my lips in frustration. If only Bella could see- not what's in a name, but what's the difference of years? I was hers forever, even if her forever was shorter than mine. And that made me contemplate, truly, for the second time in my existence… what would life be like without Bella? Even as she progressed into sixty, seventy, eighty... No amount of wrinkles or grey hairs would ever take away from the intoxicatingly beautiful creature I knew thrived beneath the skin. Not that it wasn't beautiful skin, and would always be beautiful skin—it was Bella's, how could it not? And knowing those wrinkles would mean she had lived her years to the fullest extent of possibility was a satisfying thought. But life after Bella? Meaningless. My family, however… Their importance to me was different from the way my life was tied to Bella's. Just as strong, but… different. Still, the image of what Esme's face might look like if I were to remove myself from our family... But how could I even remain with my family? Each of them mated, which would remind me of my loss if Bella were ever to be taken from me by age or disease... My mind went in endless circles. And yet I knew without a doubt I'd inevitably find myself at the Volturi's doorstep to dispose of whatever shell I knew I would be without my Bella, who was now—crying?
The credits rolled and I realized with amusement just how caught up Bella had gotten in the story. I sighed mentally as I recalled the last scene. It was so easy for humans, really—the desire to forfeit life was achieved by any number of things. Too easy.
"I will admit, I'm slightly jealous of Romeo at the end," I said as I wiped a tear off of her ivory cheek with a wisp of her hair.
Bella said musingly, "She really is beautiful."
I was mildly appalled that that's where her thoughts went. "No," I corrected her. "I'm not jealous for Juliet—merely the simplicity of suicide," I said teasingly. "Human beings have things so effortlessly on that front! All it takes is knocking back one measly shot of poison…"
Bella paled and the horror was evident on her face. "What?"
"It's just… something I had to consider before," I clarified. "I had an idea from Carlisle's exploits that it would not be easy. I honestly don't know how many times he even tried to commit suicide at first, once he fully realized what he had turned into…" My voice trailed off as I watched her eyes widen. I deliberately forced my voice to return to its cheerful tease, "He's obviously still healthy as a horse." I smiled.
Bella didn't. She turned and stared at me, as if to really look into my face. "What on earth do you mean?" she exclaimed. "Something you had to consider before?" My own words flew out of her mouth in a demanding rush. "What are you talking about?"
"Well, this past spring, when you… nearly got… killed…" Memories of that awful room with that monster James, his eyes full of mockery as he crouched over Bella's bleeding, broken form flashed across my mind and I took a deep breath as I tried to bring my voice back to a lighter tone. "Granted, I was most assuredly attempting to try to find you, alive, but in the back of my head I was making back-up plans. And, as I mentioned, it's easier for a human than it would be for me."
Bella's left hand came up almost unconsciously to trace the scar on her right hand. She had started slowly shaking her head even before I had finished speaking. She gave an involuntary shudder and she quoted me again. "Back-up plans?" she asked weakly.
The mere possibility of life without Bella was almost blasphemous. It seemed so simple, so obvious to me. Could she really not understand the depth of my love for her, the unbreakable connection I felt with her? I rolled my eyes at the thought. "It's not as though I would live without you. I just wasn't quite certain on how to execute it—I knew Jasper and Emmett would be no help… and so I'd thought perhaps I would travel to Italy and do something that would stimulate the Volturi into action."
It seemed odd that I would be discoursing with Bella now about the thoughts I'd had only a few moments ago. Bella interrupted my brooding sharply.
"What is a Volturi?" she exclaimed.
I was momentarily stunned at her fervor but my thoughts quickly resumed their place on the train they'd been riding earlier… I realized she would have no idea whom Aro, Marcus, and Caius were, to say nothing of their guard and their powerful potential. I attempted to explain.
"They're… a family," I began delicately. "An ancient, powerful family of vampires. I suppose they would be considered the next thing to a royal family in our world. Carlisle was staying with them for a while in Italy, in his earlier years before he migrated and decided to stay here in the United States. Do you recall the account he gave?"
"I definitely recall that," Bella confirmed with a shiver.
She would have done more than shiver if she had been fully aware of all they were capable of… With all their unchecked ability, I was sure they were the perfect answer should I ever need a solution to the problem of my existence. I had only seen the three leaders through Carlisle's memories and a painting in his study from centuries ago, but Aro's eager smile, Caius' malicious grin, and Marcus' attitude of utter boredom to everything around him were images that prevailed through the filter Carlisle attempted to see them through for my sake. I was all too aware that they and their guard would have no problems disposing of me if I were to cause enough trouble for them. But that was no longer an issue. My Bella was alive, here, and with me.
"Anyway, you don't provoke the Volturi. Not unless you truly desire death—or whatever happens when we cease to exist." I was honestly a little bored with the concept; considering how much I'd thought of it in the past, the thoughts were suddenly stale and unappealing.
Bella's eyes widened once more as she placed her hands on either side of my face. I could feel her muscles tensing with strain, with the effort she put into holding her hands there, but not the pressure itself. It would have taken much, much more to make any serious difference.
"You can't ever, ever, ever even think of anything like that, ever again!" she said forcefully. "Despite what happens to me, you aren't allowed to hurt yourself!"
"Well," I replied reasonably, "I won't ever place you in harm's way again, so the point is moot."
"You won't ever place me in harm's way? I thought we had confirmed that it's my fault I've got so much bad luck! How could you even think of such things!"
She was genuinely angry now, and I didn't want her to be upset over something so trivial. But I had to make her see reason, so I asked her, "Well, what would you do, if you had been in my place?"
"That's different."
I couldn't understand how. I laughed at her bemusedly as she dug herself into a logical hole.
"What if something did happen," she interrupted my laughter. "If you died- would you want me to just kill myself?"
The chuckle died in my throat. I honestly hadn't contemplated that point. "I suppose I see your side… to a degree. But how could I live without you?"
"The same way you lived before I ever stumbled into your life and complicated it," she retorted.
I sighed. It wasn't nearly that simple, and I told her so.
"Well it should be easy for you- I'm really not all that fascinating," she said.
I was about to counterpoint that when I realized I was doing just what I'd hoped to avoid— argue with her about a nonexistent issue.
"It's a moot point, remember?" I reminded her. Before the words left my mouth, I could hear the sound of a familiar engine turn onto Bella's street. I sat up and pulled away from her, painful as it was, before we ended up in the middle of a make-up kiss that I had no desire for Charlie to walk in on.
She smiled a little as she sat back against the cushions. "My dad?" she asked.
I just smiled, as three seconds later he did indeed pull up to the house. Bella seemed determined to at least be touching me in some small way, and she grabbed my hand and held it in hers with a solid grip.
The odor of steaming human food preceded Charlie as he walked into the room. "Hi there, kiddos," he said, smiling at Bella.
Oh, he's here again. They're practically inseparable, those two… I doubt he'll be hungry but I at least ought to offer…
"I figured you'd like a cooking and cleaning break in honor of your birthday. Are ya hungry?" His eyes remained on Bella.
"Yeah, thank you Dad," Bella smiled up at her father and we joined him in the kitchen.
He set the pizza down on the table and kicked off his shoes. Does that kid ever eat? It's kind of strange… Although, I guess having a doctor for a dad would make you more health-conscious. Wonder if the poor kid has ever even eaten pizza before…
I smiled to myself at the memory of Bella's fascination with me and food in the burgeoning days of our relationship. If he knew how I'd end up coughing up the food later, he wouldn't be so eager for me to eat at all. Still, he made no audible comment on my obvious lack of appetite.
I sat through their meal and chatted with Bella and her father over the typical happenings of a small town. But when the meal was done I noticed how close the hands of the clock were to proclaiming it seven p.m. and thought to ask Charlie for his permission for Bella's occasion tonight. Even now, I felt safer with Bella at my house knowing someone else knew where she was. I asked if he minded that I borrowed Bella for the night, and he responded in the affirmative with the explanation that his favorite baseball team would be playing that night.
As we stood up to vacate the table, Charlie picked up the camera he'd bought for her birthday to complement the scrapbook her mother had purchased. "Here," he said, tossing the camera towards Bella.
In characteristic Bella fashion, the camera missed her fingertips and was headed for the linoleum. I caught hold of it before it crashed to the floor, garnering a "Nice save!" from Charlie. He continued with, "You know, if the Cullens have something planned tonight you ought to take pictures. You know your mother—she's going to want prints before you even get them taken."
Documenting as much of Bella's life as possible seemed like a good idea to me, considering Charlie would need something to remember her by in the unlikely event Alice's one-time vision of Bella as a vampire came true. I shook the thought from my mind and agreed, "That's a good idea, Charlie." I handed the camera to Bella, who in turn focused it on me. I grinned at her as she snapped a shot.
"Well, it's working," she grinned back.
"Good," Charlie said. "Hey, do me a favor and say hello to Alice for me would ya? I haven't seen her over here in some time…"
"Dad, it's been all of three days," Bella reminded him.
I could tell from Charlie's thoughts that he was quite fond of Alice. That wasn't unusual; my sister could have a very magnetic charm when she wanted to. Charm aside, though, Charlie was mostly grateful for having someone over to take care of Bella in ways he couldn't while she was recovering from the injures she'd sustained from James.
"I'll let her know," I smiled at him.
"Alrighty. Well you enjoy yourselves, kids…" he trailed off as he made his way toward the couch. Bella was freely mine tonight.
It was with a smile that I led her from the kitchen to her truck, and said a silent prayer of thanks when she didn't object to me holding the passenger door open for her. I reminded myself of that pleasure as I chugged painfully along in her ancient vehicle with its built in speed limit…
"Go easy," Bella cautioned me as the truck groaned.
I couldn't understand why she would voluntarily keep such a thing when I was more than willing to help her with a new vehicle… the possibilities were endless! "You know what would be perfect? An Audi coupe. It would be very quiet but with a lot of power… you'd love it…"
"There is absolutely nothing wrong with my truck," she declared defensively. "Speaking of unnecessary expenses, I hope you know you'd be in trouble if you spent anything for my birthday."
"Not a single cent," I promised.
"Good."
I was exasperated. She had no clue how important this would be, not only for Alice, but for my family. Bella didn't understand just how excited they would be. I explained the significance of the evening, recounting for her the conversation Alice and I had had at lunch, and I could see understanding in a startled flash across her face. They so rarely got the chance to genuinely celebrate anything—not counting the countless "weddings" we'd had for Carlisle and Esme, Jasper and Alice, and Emmett and Rosalie in turn…. Oh, Rosalie… With that thought, it would be best to warn her…
I cleared my throat. "And when I say that everyone is excited, I really mean everyone…"
"Like…all of your family?" Bella asked with slight panic. "I was under the impression that Rosalie and Emmett were still in Africa!"
"Well, they were, but Emmett wanted to be here."
She digested that before tremulously asking, "And… what about Rosalie?"
It was more than common knowledge that Rosalie disdained Bella, but she had promised to be on her best behavior and I told Bella so, asking her not to worry.
She didn't reply, so I changed the subject. "If you won't let me buy you a car, then, what would you like for your birthday?"
She said with a pout, "You're very much aware of what I'd like."
I should have stuck with Rosalie.
I took a deep breath and said, "Bella, please... not tonight!"
"Fine… perhaps Alice could give me what I want."
I mentally cursed Alice for even mentioning she'd had a glimpse of Bella as one of our kind. I turned to Bella with a promise, "This won't be your final birthday, Bella."
"That's unfair!" she exclaimed.
I was exasperated. How could she keep pushing this? Unfair? Did she honestly think me ending her life was fair for me? I took several deep breaths to calm down as we pulled into the driveway.
"Don't forget, it's a birthday party," I reminded her. "Please—try to be good."
"Fine," she said resignedly. She took my outstretched hand and a quizzical look came across her face. "I want to know something."
I steeled myself for whatever she could come up with now. This day did not have a good track record for Bella's sensible inquiries.
"If I develop this film, will you show up in that picture I snapped?"
That was so unexpected I laughed, shaking my head. After all we had discussed so long ago about myth versus reality in the meadow, did she really think I wouldn't appear on film? Had she not seen the portraits and photographs of each of us scattered throughout the house? Still laughing, I opened the door to my home and led her inside. My family had heard the car coming a few seconds ago and took that as their cue to gather in the living room.
A loud cheer of "Happy Birthday, Bella!" greeted us as she flushed and lowered her gaze to the floor. It was the only open space that Alice and Esme hadn't covered with flowers or candles. But in the soft candlelight reflecting off her hair and eyes, with the fragrance of flowers hanging in the air, I all but forgot my family.
Bella was a hundred times more beautiful than I imagined.
The blush that made her seem so achingly beautiful only signified her discomfort, however, so I forced myself to focus on the task at hand— making sure Bella was happy. I pulled her close to me and buried my face in her hair, kissing the soft tresses. I relinquished my hold on her to allow for Esme and Carlisle to greet her as well. Carlisle's profession being what it was (and Esme's compassionate nature brimming from every pore) left me completely at ease as they embraced Bella.
"Sorry, Bella," Carlisle whispered loudly with a mischievous gleam in his eyes. "We couldn't tone Alice down!"
Emmett and Rosalie stood next in the receiving line, and they didn't assuage my mind much as far as keeping Bella safe went. Emmett would never intentionally hurt Bella, of that I was sure, and his awareness of his superhuman strength made him cautious. Don't worry, bro, I'll be careful! he thought. He tapped Bella with the lightest of touches on her shoulder and mentioned, "You didn't change one bit! I thought I'd be able to tell you'd aged a year, but you're still the same Blushing Bella!"
"Gee, thanks," Bella said with soft sarcasm as she gave Emmett more reason to use his new nickname.
Rosalie stood off, blank-faced, with thoughts of boredom. I just don't understand what you see in her, Edward.
I glared at her.
She raised her eyebrows at me. What? I could be taking down an exotic gazelle right now but I'm here because Emmett "couldn't miss this." What is it about that human that makes everyone think the world revolves around her? Her thoughts became less directed at me and more pensive in general. I had no patience for Rosalie and managed to bite back a retort when Emmett spoke up.
"I've gotta step out for a sec," he glanced at me before winking at Alice. Keep her occupied, 'kay?
I gave him the slightest of nods.
Once again he directed his communication towards Bella—"Don't do anything funny while I'm gone!"
"I'll do my best," Bella smiled.
He slipped from the room as a beaming Alice danced forward from where she had been holding Jasper's hand. Jasper, for his part, stayed put. I flinched as I felt him take mental note of just where each exit was, Bella's proximity to them, to me, and the pulse of her throat that his gaze locked on…. My low hiss wasn't heard over Alice's announcement that it was time to open the presents.
Jasper blinked and then lowered his gaze in apology. I understood at once—it wasn't Bella, it could have been any human that he was strategizing to corner and… Still. With Bella, that was over the line and he knew it. Shame filled his face and I noticed his eyes weren't as golden as they could have been. I was about to ask him quietly when he'd last fed when Bella's confused voice piped up, "Um, thanks?" as she held an empty box.
Rosalie even smiled and Jasper chuckled, glad that something broke the tension. "It's a new radio- for your truck," he said. "Emmett is outside installing it as we speak, so you won't be able to return it." He winked.
When he did that, he was much more like the brother I knew and loved. This evening was actually turning into more fun than I'd thought. Seeing Bella unable to escape the gifts she more than deserved made me happy.
"Thank you Rosalie, and Jasper. And thanks Emmett!" she called out. His laugh could be heard echoing from the front yard, which made us all laugh.
"Mine and Edward's next!" Alice exclaimed as she walked to hand Bella a small, flat package. I grinned in anticipation. I'd spent a little over two months perfecting, recording, and then editing the music I thought she'd like best, and I was actually feeling a bit like a child on Christmas even though the gift wasn't mine to open.
But Bella shot me a look when she saw the "To/From" tag. "Remember what you promised!"
I was about to shoot her an exasperated reply when Emmett came bounding in.
"I'm right on time!" he exclaimed triumphantly. He ended up pushing Jasper forward, who had already moved up, in an attempt to get a closer look. With everyone crowded so close, I felt the need to comfort her.
Brushing back a stray twist of hair that had been teased loose, I assured her that I hadn't spent a single penny. I felt her shiver beneath my touch, which caused me to shiver in turn. I could tell she was breathing in my scent even as I noticed the knowing chuckles and smiles the rest of my family shared amongst each other.
With resolution, Bella held her hand out to Alice. "Let's have it," she sighed.
Emmett was practically bouncing from excitement.
Bella began to remove the wrapping and rolled her eyes at me.
In that instant, two things happened at once:
One, a single drop of blood welled up from a paper cut on Bella's finger.
Two, Jasper's eyes widened and his nostrils flared at this close proximity to fresh, human blood. I didn't even take the time to listen to his thoughts. The wild, inhuman desire on his face was enough to set me in motion.
"NO!" I shouted. Without a thought other than for Bella's safety, I flew in front of her to shield her from Jasper's on-coming rush. She ended up falling back across the table, which broke under my force, scattering cake, flowers, candles, and glass everywhere. Shards of glass embedded themselves in her skin as she sank to the floor, pale and barely breathing, and a fresh rush of crimson started flowing down her arm.
Jasper snarled and was grasping for her faster than a blink, with Esme wringing her hands in despair and Carlisle reaching towards Jasper, just missing his collar by inches. Even Rosalie seemed momentarily frozen, horrified by Jasper's manic frenzy.
I saw rather than heard Alice shriek as I pushed Jasper, holding him at bay while Emmett's eyes grew large and in a split second he was attempting to wrestle Jasper back. He took in a deep breath and held it, but when he inhaled he caught something, a trace, an essence. I recognized it immediately in the minds of every one of my family members as soon as I smelled it for myself, the word branded onto the forefront of their minds in a single, united proclamation of recognition and hunger.
Blood.
They mentally echoed the word as they turned to lock their eyes on my worst nightmare— Bella, small and bleeding on the floor, gazing up at my family in terror.