Thanks to all the wonderful fanfic members for reviewing my story

Angleico356789: I found out about Nodame Cantabile throught the drama. After that, I watched some of the anime. I've skimmed some of the comic.

Chapter 2

"Mukya! Tanya, you've already tried on 9 outfits. Just pick one! Senpai should be happy that Nodame wears her clothes a few times before changing. All this changing is making Nodame's head spin."

"But everything makes me look sooooo fat! What if he sees me and finds me disgusting?" Tanya flopped the 10th outfit onto the bed before throwing herself on top of it.

"He?" Nodame's flew over to Tanya's bed and pulled her friend up from the pile of clothes.

"Who's he? Tonya, you met someone new? Who is he? Is he cute? Is he someone I know? Does he go to the conservatory as well? Is he good looking like Chiaki-sempai? Never mind the last question. No one will ever be as yummy as senpai…henhenhen" (heart heart flowing out of Nodame…)

"Nobody. He obviously doesn't care about me", Nodame's friend answered her quietly before getting out of the bed and putting on her jacket. I guess she's choosing the 9th outfit…

"What's wrong Tanya? Does he not like you back? Who is this baka? Tell Nodame and Nodame will have him killed."

"Oh stop it. I don't want to talk about it. It's all one-sided anyways. I don't want to talk about it anymore. Let's get going or we're going to be late."

As the two friends walked to school, Tanya stayed quiet and lost in her own thought. Nodame didn't say anything fearing of intrusion on her friend's serious thoughts. Nodame knows better then to bother love when love should happen on its own.

That's why I have never bugged Chiaki-senpai. Nodame knew that Chiaki cared for her. No one would put with her incessant nagging and oddball ways if he didn't. Even when she caused that fire in his other apartment, he still accompanied her to all her hospital visits for the burns she got from standing too close to the flames. He made sure that he was the one that helped her change the bandages on the burn and applied the burn medication for her. The first bandage change, Nodame had attempted to change it herself and received a scolding from Chiaki. The attempt was so bad that she had ended up eating some of the medication! The next day, Chiaki stuck a schedule page on her fridge showing all her hospital check-up dates and the times when he will be around to change the wrapping on the wounds for her. "Go without me for those check-ups or try changing the wrappings yourself again and I'll kill you." Chiaki threatened her. Nodame remembered smiling so much that day staring at the schedule that her cheeks throbbed the whole day afterwards.

Nodame touched her right arm. The burn no longer hurt and it no longer required any medical attention but there was an evident scar. The scar wasn't deep or anything serious but for Nodame, it served as a badge of love. It was a badge of love that Chiaki-sempai held for her. Chiaki had given her cream to lessen the scar but Nodame never bothered to apply it. Chiaki did a few times but Nodame fibbed to him that she was not that stupid that she couldn't apply cream. If Chiaki knew that she kept the scar as a physical evidence of his love for her, he surely would have whipped any object he had within his reach at her.

"Nodame, watch out!" Tanya screamed and pulled Nodame backwards.

"Gyabo!"

"Why would you walk out onto the street like that without looking? Are you trying to get yourself killed? Why are you rubbing your arm? Does it hurt? The wound still hasn't healed?"

"No, no. Nodame's arm doesn't hurt anymore. Nodame is just thinking about how much Chiaki-senpai loves Nodame."

"Oh geez, this again. Nodame, I don't understand why you would want to keep that hideous scar. A love badge is just the stupidest thing I have ever heard. Didn't Shinichi already give you that heart necklace? Isn't that enough of a sign of his love?"

Nodame fiddled with the ruby heart that hung from the silver necklace. Chiaki had given it to her before his premier performance for winning the Platini conductor competition. Nodame's heart had soared when she saw Chiaki pull out the white jewellery case. The gift was beautiful and Nodame really did love it. Still, she couldn't help but feel a pang of…disappointment? She knew in all honesty that Chiaki would not be proposing anytime soon but still….Did this gift mean he loved her or that he liked her a lot. Love, like…those two words couldn't have been more further from each other then in her goal to attain his heart.

Nodame couldn't help but feel lost at times with Chiaki. She knew she held a place in his life and that she was the first person he looked for whenever anything happened. But at times, it felt like she only held this place because she happened to have been in his life the longest out of everyone he knew in Paris. She was someone he could connect to his life before Paris. And because of that, she was his habit. Habits were just as addicting as food in Nodame's opinion. You couldn't live without it but at the same time, would sometimes despise it cause you depended on it so much. Nodame never wanted to admit it but had always feared that in all truthfullness, she was at best, his habit.

But there was that kiss after her recital at Rowal…Senpai wouldn't have kissed me if he didn't feel nothing for me. Or maybe, it was just a reward for her performance?

Nodame shook her head in frustration. That kiss had left Nodame sleepless for more then a month. At the time, she was so thrilled and overjoyed that she had overcome the big wall that Chiaki had put up in front of his heart. At the time, she felt that surely, things would be different between them now.

But that one moment of blissful thoughts turned into many months of nothingness. And things didn't seem to progress. Time seemed to forget about that one aspect of their lives. Chiaki's career was heading full force into the horizon and Nodame's piano was making improvements in leaps. When Chiaki had to move back into the apartment, Nodame's hopes once again became positive that things would change. But still, everything remained stagnant. Review their daily life schedule and compare it to their lives in Japan and one will see that not much has changed. He cooked for her in the morning, they depart for the day for their career/education and return back for dinner together. The nights were usually filled with more studying of scores and musical pieces. Chiaki was less harsh with her now but to an outsider looking in, no one would guess that they were a couple.

He still walked ahead of her when they were together. She was always left to catch up after him. If I was given a dollar for everytime Senpai called me 'baka', I would be a gagillionaire. But lastly, it seemed like that kiss would be their last. In all the months following, Chiaki never as much as offered a hug towards her. She knew that if she asked him why, Chiaki would just call her a hentai and throw something at her. But beyond the weirdo's thoughts, Nodame was still human. And a physical act of a hug or a kiss every now and then would have given her assurance and less anxiety.

Nodame had never told anyone about this, not even to Tanya. But she was truly fearful that Chiaki had no physical attraction to her at all. Nodame had known Chiaki's ex-girlfriend, Saiko, and she looked like someone that fell out of a fashion magazines. Nodame in comparison to her was just plain. Chiaki-senpai is a genius but he is still a man. Doesn't he have needs like the rest of us human beings? Deosn't everyone want to hold onto the one they love? If he loved me, he would want to hug and kiss me all the time wouldn't he? But if he doesn't do that then love must not be….

"Eeeek…we're going to be late if we don't hurry." Tanya shrieked Nodame out of her thoughts and both girl left behind their love woes to make their dash to get to school on time.

Please review. Again, good and bad reviews are welcome.

I'm finding it really hard not to make this story sad. There's just too many unanswered questions in Chiaki/Nodame's relationship in my mind that I can't help but try to answer it for my own insanity.