A/N – Just so everyone knows The Last Winter is a real movie it was in 2006 and has Larry Fessenden aka Flamethrower guy in it and apparently also has Wendigo's. Just thought I would let you guys understand the reference.

Chris POV

I feel my phone vibrate just when the movie is just about done, I look over and Sam is passed out curled up in a ball against the arm of the couch and Josh is still up pointing out things that could've made the movie even better or saying some ideas that he is getting just watching it. He could definitely be a horror movie director one day if he puts his mind to it. I make comments here and there about things I notice but when I glance down at my phone I notice Ashley text me.

Ashley: Are you up?

To be honest I'm surprised that she is even up, she is just like Sam to pass out early. I look over at Josh and he's still into the movie I lower my phone so it's flush with the arm of the chair to reply.

Chris: Yeah what's up?

Ashley: Were you sleeping? I'm sorry if I woke you. I just can't sleep…

Chris: I was up already. What's wrong?

Ashley: I've just been feeling horrible, I feel like I'm a horrible friend.

I try not to change my facial expression much in case Josh is looking I don't want to trigger anything since he seems to be having a good night so far.

Chris: No Ash, you're a great friend loving, caring, and funny. Heck you're the first person I go to when I need someone to talk to.

Ashley: Thanks Chris. :) Wait a second how come you aren't in bed it's like almost 1 in the morning.

Chris: I'm with Josh and Sam watching a movie. Technically just Josh since Sam fell asleep. ZZZ

"Who are you texting?" Josh says looking over at me. Busted. I put my phone down and look toward the TV with my poker face, "My mom was just asking me if I was coming home" I say smoothly. He scoffs and says "Oh I thought you only text Ashley with that goofy smile, my mistake" he refocuses back to the movie. "What? Shut up!" I say throwing a pillow from the chair at him; he puts his arm up to block and it falls on the ground he starts laughing as he gets up. "Like I said man my mistake" he says with his hands up as if he's surrendering. I feel my phone vibrate and I glance at it.

Ashley: Well tell Josh I said Hi! Are we still on for tomorrow?

"See there it is!" Josh says pointing his finger at me, I look up at him confused looking down at myself like something is there. "What are you talking about?" he looks at me and leans to pinch my cheek but I lean back in the recliner to get away. "The goofy smile was just there again! Texting your mom MY ASS. Your texting Ashley!" he says in a harsh whisper, grabbing a blanket from nearby and draping it over Sam.

"So what? ...But anyway she said Hi" I say pulling my phone out to reply to her. "But that does not mean I make whatever goofy smile it is that you're talking about". He giggles and waves as he sits back down to finish up the movie, shaking his head. He knows I can't fool him, he knows me too well.

Chris: Of course.

Ashley: Can't wait, ask if Sam and Josh want to come!

Chris: I'll ask…

I'm not sure Josh is going to want to go, lately I've been asking him to go places and do things and usually it's some excuse as to why he can't. When we all know he just isn't ready to face the world, and who am I to force him. Right? Or is it I'm supposed to force him and be there every step of the way. Being a friend is filled with so many decisions. But I guess it doesn't hurt to try… or wait I have a better idea.

"Are you staying the night?" Josh says looking over at me, I turn toward the TV and didn't even realize the credits already rolling. I look at the time "Yeah I'm probably going to crash too; do you have some shorts for me to change into?" He nods his head and motions for me to follow him, I get up and head for the stairs. He asks "So what's going on between you and Ashley?" I quickly respond "We're friends what do you mean?" he turns his head and glances over his shoulder with the do you think I'm stupid look. There is very little that Josh doesn't know about me so I break. "Nothing I mean… we talk… but not like that. Just as friends talk." He opens his door and says "You think you got friend zoned?" I scoff acting like I don't care "Not like it matters she doesn't see me that way" he shakes his head as he digs into his drawer and says "Look man, if you want to do it right it takes time, I completely get that. But keep in mind if you let too much time go by you may lose her" he tosses me a pair of shorts and I catch them "Thanks man", he grabs a couple of his pillows and blanket and head downstairs. I head toward the bathroom to change, I walk in and I can see some of the blood from earlier from when Josh must've slipped. I quickly change, use the bathroom. I look at myself in the mirror and decide to wash my face; I look like toddler who fed themselves for the first time. I open the medicine cabinet to find some facial soap, I see a lot of pink and microbeads black head washes? Those must've been Hannah and Beth's I squeeze one of them in my hand and start to wash my face, I still had some residue from my amazingly good sandwich earlier.

I finish up I go to put the cleanser bottle back once I was done and feeling refreshed and noticed an almost empty pill bottle, the only reason it caught my eye was because of the date of refill 02/28, that was a couple months ago and it still has some pills in it. I wonder what risperidone is, I didn't think anything of it till I saw Josh Washington on it.

JOSH POV

I walk downstairs and see Sam curled up against the arm of the couch sleeping soundly, if she stays like that her back and neck is going to be killing her tomorrow. I go over and start to take all the cushions off the couch other than the ones that are around Sam, put them off to the side along with the pillows and blanket I brought down on the recliner for Chris. I move the coffee table out the way, then go around and walk over to Sam and nudge her shoulder gently until her eyes peeked open. She doesn't say anything since she still is in sleep zombie mode. I tell her "Let me pull out the sofa bed for you" she nods and gets up shakily and slowly, now she really looks like a zombie. She sits on the arm of the sofa while I quickly pull it out and throw a pillow on her side with a blanket. She's sitting on the arm of the sofa with her eyes closed still, she seems really tired. I touch her arm gently to let her know I was done, she open and looked over and turned to walk over to the bed. I start walking toward the stairs "Alright well I'll see you-" "Josh?" I turn my head and see her sitting on the edge of the bed rubbing her eyes, for some reason I didn't respond I just waited. She looked up to see if I was still there and said "um…would you? Never mind" she said turning to put her legs on the bed and dismiss whatever idea she had, I walk over to her unsure, she's not being her usual … Sam self "Is something wrong?" she looked down nervously. This is really unlike her. She looks up almost saddened "Can you…lay with me till I fall asleep?" Good thing the lights are off, I felt my face get warm with a blush. I don't get it, she's been sleeping over for years and she's never asked me to lay with her. But I feel kind of weird to ask her why, since I'm pretty sure I already know the reason why. It's the same reason I lay awake every night; Hannah and Beth on the mind. Without saying a word I walk over to the other side of the bed and grab a pillow and lay on the bed facing the ceiling. My heart starts to race slightly I haven't laid with a girl in a long time, and it's almost invigorating even with about 2 feet between us. She gets under the blanket and lays down facing me and says "Thank you" quietly. I nod my head "No problem, just keep your hands to yourself" I say turning to face her in a playful voice, even in the dark I can imagine the face she made. But instead she turns over away from and says "I'll try, no promises" it sounded half serious half laced with sarcasm, I can never tell with her. I brush it off as playful banter "Night Sam". I start to hear Chris coming down the stairs, he's on his phone since I can see the glow of the phone on his face. He must be texting Ashley still. He walks over to the recliner and slides in, he looks over at me and Sam with a slightly confused look, but doesn't say anything and rolls over.

I turn and stare at the ceiling waiting for Sam to fall asleep so I can go upstairs to my bed. I'm not in any rush being upstairs alone in my room though. But I do try to occupy my mind, I try doing a few exercises that I learned from therapy. Thinking of happy memories and such, but it was so hard to focus with the woman lying next to me. I couldn't focus, every memory that was coming to mind had her in them. Moments I'd never gave a second thought to, till now. When we would all go out together and all the petty disputes we would have, but laugh them off. I smile to myself, I mean I've always had a crush on Sam but she is too good for me, I know that. To be honest I don't think I'd never act on it in a million years, she deserves better than me.

I turn facing her, I can't help it when I'm next to her I just want to be closer. But I decide against it, I can see the silhouette of her curves through the thin blanket draped around her, the dip near her waist. My mouth starts to water and I can feel my member twitch in response I need to get out of here, but I don't move, I stay because I want to be near her. I turn around and face the other way, I can't look at her anymore or I really might have to go upstairs. I yawn and just start counting hoping that would help ease my mind enough to go to sleep. But my mind keeps drifting to her and my erection starts to become painful. I get up slowly trying not to wake Sam or Chris and head in the kitchen to get something to drink, I did feel parched. I walk over to the fridge and open it, grabbed the water and drank it straight out the jug, parents are never here to care anyway. They took so much time off work when Hannah and Beth went missing; now that they're back working they had so much to catch up on they're never here. Not that they were around much before but now it's almost like I'm here alone all the time. Other than when Sam and Chris come to visit, don't get me wrong the others come by every once in a while but they're in relationships so when they do come its short or rare.

I took a few gulps and just sat at the table with it for a while, thinking, I would say nothing in particular but then I would be lying. I was thinking of my sisters and how they would have slumber parties with their friends; I would invite the guys. We would go out in the backyard and play drinking games and take a dip in the hot tub and just be care free. I started daydreaming as if I was still in that moment, smelling the fruity drinks they would be mixing and the smell of a summer day outside, I swear I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply and it felt like I was really there.

I hadn't realized how long I sat there, but it must've been long enough that my lack of presence went noticed. I heard footsteps behind me but I didn't move or say anything, just sat in silence wiping my face. I didn't even realize I was crying. I felt someone next to me but I didn't look over I just stared straight ahead and drank some more water. But she must've noticed the tear stains on my cheek, and before I could protest I can feel her hug me from behind. So warm and inviting I lean into it and place my arm on hers that are wrapped around my torso. I hear her mumble "I miss them too" my hear flutters and sinks at the same time. She removes her arms and I turn to face her and see her tear stained face as well. Is it horrible to say even when she is sad she is beautiful? I stand and she looks up at me and just hugs me again, this time I can hug her back properly. I wrap my arms around her and squeeze her gently; being this close to her is all I want and it's everything I imagined. Her skin is so smooth and soft and she smells so good, I melt into her embrace. I can feel her squeeze me a bit tighter. She let go and pulled back wiping her eyes from more tears that were threatening to fall and apologized. "I'm sorry Josh, I'm supposed to be strong for you. I didn't mean to bother you it's just that-" I leaned in and hugged her this time, not because I needed it but because she did. I've been so wrapped up in how I feel and trying to hide my pain from my friends, I didn't stop to think that they may be feeling the same pain. I leaned back from the hug but she was still right in front of me. I saw a stray tear trailing down her cheek and wiped it, she looked up at me in response, and she looked like she was holding her breath. I thought about kissing her right then and there…but decided against it, I don't want to take advantage of her being vulnerable. I grab her by the hand silently and lead her back to the living room toward the bed, she gets in her side and I get on the other. This time the 2 feet of space that we had between us before turned into about 6 inches if that. She laid near the middle, she had her back facing me and I was facing her back. I whispered "Night" and as soon as I was about to close my eyes, she reached for my hand wrapped it around her waist to hold her and said "Thank you". I think for the first time in my life I fell asleep smiling, on the outside.