Okay, here the first chapter, I know you judge my fic with a prologue so ... I hope you'll like it. Prepare your handkerchiefs because I plan to make you cry ;)
Enjoy ! :D
I don't want to die ...
Laura POV
I'm in my bedroom since many hours now, I don't know how much time exactly but my mother went many times to knock on my door a few times to talk to me or ask me if I want food. But I never answered her so she left every time.
I don't want talk to anybody, I cry all the time. I begin to ask me where my tears come from because I just cry since I knew the news, what I have …
I can't believe it can happen to me, I'm just 18 years old. I'm too young … I wanted to do so many things in my life, and now it's becoming impossible. Why is it happening to me ?!
I don't want to die …
For the moment, I've told anybody about my near death … I don't have the courage to affront the persons I love the most or even my fans … It's too hard to say it. I just want to stay with them for a long time but now, how can I do that … ?
Well, I can survive, but I have only 3 to 4 % to only live 5 years. And it's only if I do a chirurgical intervention … After that, I should do chemotherapy. I can survive my entire life, but it's very rare … I have many chances to live, only six months and 5 years if I do the chirurgical intervention …
How can I announce that to my loved ones ?
My whole life process in my head since the doctor told me the news … I imagine all the reactions I can receive : my family will cry all day with me, my friends will be shocked and next they will cry, my fans will send me so many tweets …
There is only one I can't imagine his reaction : my best friend, my confidant, the one who always make me smile and laugh, or with who I always argue but just for teasing … Ross.
That will be the hardest … I don't know how he will look at me after that, how he will react, if he will let me down or support me … He is so unpredictable …
Like I have no tears anymore, I look at my phone and see 16 text messages and 24 missed calls. I'd stayed like that for so long ? The most was from Ross, he really cares about me… I really don't know how I can announce him this new…
I look at the date and hour. It's 6:09 p.m and I stayed here to cry without eat or sleep 26 hours. Wouaw, I can't believe I cried all this time …
I finally exited my bedroom, it's the perfect moment to tell to my family because I can't cry anymore …
I go downstairs and join my family who was on the sofa watching tv. There were all here : my mother, my father, my sister and even my dog Velvet.
« Hi. » All their heads turned to me. They all looked worried, certainly because I didn't sleep since so much hours.
« Hi sweetie ! What's going on ? Why were you locked in your bedroom ? » My mother rushs to me while she say that. She really looks worry.
« Well, you remember my stomach always hurt and I'm always so tired ? So, I've seen a doctor yesterday, I did some exams and ... » They all stand up now and they looked at me with a forward look. They want to know the end of the story. But I can't say that to them like that, I'm scared that my mom will faint.
« You should sit down. » They look at me with a scared look now. Once they sat, I put my knees on the ground to face them.
« I know why I was like that, it's because ... » I looked down, I can't tell them that and look at them in the eyes.
« I have a cancer … of pancreatic. And it's the worst cancer because I have almost any chances to survive ... » All my family cries now. They all hug me. We stay like that some minutes.
After a while, my mom looked at me and asked me how many purcent I have. I explain her the chirurgical intervention and chemotherapy.
« You should do the chirurgical intervention, we'll have 5 years with you at least ... » I look at my father and my sister to see their reaction and they nod. So I nod too for them to understand me, I'll do the surgery.
Next, I text all my friends to come at my house so that I can tell them about my cancer. The only I don't have the courage to text is Ross. I want to tell him when we'll be alone …
Half an hour later, my close friends was all here : Raini, Calum, Rydel and some friends from school.
We are in my bedroom and we all cry. They take me in their arm to reassure me.
Raini look at me and ask me why I didn't text Ross between two sniffles.
« Because, I don't know how he will react, I'm scared to tell him. I think it's better if I wait to be alone with him ... » She nods.
« Yeah you're right. He's so unpredictable. » says Rydel. She knows him really well because he's her brother.
« I said it to myself. »
They stay with me all night. They don't want let me alone and they want benefit of me … before I die …
It's Monday now, so like Raini and Calum stayed with me all night, I can go to work with them. Rydel went home and my school friends left for school.
I'm so scared to see Ross's reaction.
We arrive to work place, Ross isn't here for now. I feel relieved.
But the whole team is here so I tell them about my illness. They are all sad, some of them take me in their arm. It's so painful to see them so nice with me. I'll miss all of them.
I hug Kevin and Heith, the Austin and Ally's producers, when I heard something in my back.
« What's going on here ? Why are you all so sad ? »
All heads turn to me. Ross looks at me with a weird look.
« Laura ? Why everyone look at you ? What's going on ? »
I approach him. Once I just face to him, I tell him if he wants to come with me because I should talk to him. He nods but remains reluctant. I see he can feel there is something strange … I take his hand and I take him in my dressing-room.
I close the door because I want just Ross and I, I don't want the others to see us or heard us.
« Okay, Laura, please, tell me what's going on ? You're scaring me. »
« You should sit down. »
« I can fell something really wrong, people say that when things are wrong ... »
« Please, just sit down and listen to me. »
« … Okay. »
Once he sits, I sit next to him.
« Okay, uhh … Ross, you could see I was feeling sick last days ? So I saw a doctor and ... » I look in his eyes and it's my biggest mistake because I can see his eyes in mine, these eyes who make crack every time he does this. So, I can't contain myself. I jut cried and I couldn't finish my sentence … I look down and cry so much ...
Ross takes my hand and with his other hand takes my face so that I can look at him.
« Please, finish your sentence and tell me what's wrong. I want to know because I really care about you .. » I nod.
« I have a cancer Ross and I have so many chances to die. » He withdrew my hand and steps back. He puts his face between his hands. He stays like that without looking at me.
I begin to worry. I cry more. I approach him and try to touch him but he steps back again.
« Ross ? » I tell that with a low voice. I'm so hurt. Everyone reassure me and cry for me. But he just tell nothing and he doesn't cry. One second before he said he really cares about me and now he even look at me or let me touch him.
Worry was replaced by angry now. I stand up to leave the room. But I heard a noise behind me. I stop and turn to Ross.
« What ? »
« How many times we have ? » I tell him everything about that. And that I'll do the surgery.
« So maybe we have 5 years maximum, right ? »
« Yes. »
Now, he looks at me and what I see, shock me. I never saw him like that. His eyes was puffy and red, all his face was wet because he cried and he is crying again.
« I can't believe that, I can't imagine my life without you now. How can I live in 5 years ?! » He shouts when he said that.
« I don't know, I don't want to leave you. »
He stands up and rushs to me. He takes me in his arms and cries so much on my shoulder. I put my arms around him and put him close to me.
I don't want to leave him, I want to stay with like that forever. Even if now, forever means 5 years for me ...
Here the first chapter, I really hope you liked it. Please, tell me your opinion in reviews, it's really important for me.
Next if you like it 3
P.S: I'm dedicated this fic to my friend BreakDownTheWalls (she'll understand ^^). Love you sis 3