Chapter Two
Nessie pulled us eagerly into our room and to an overstuffed toy chest with all sorts of frilly, pink, and sparkly dress ups. I saw Alice's eyes light up. Heaven help me. My fashionista wife and her little niece. They'd be here for hours. I wondered whether I could make my exit now, or if I should wait until they were too immersed to notice. I decided to wait, and sat down in a chair to watch.
"So, Nessie, what outfit are we doing today?" asked Alice excitedly, kneeling next to the toy chest and pulling out a few dresses.
Nessie reached her hand out for her cheek, but changed her mind, speaking instead so she could keep digging through the chest. "Princess."
Alice pulled out a few fluffy dresses. "Which princess? This looks like Snow White, and here's Cinderella …"
Nessie cocked her head to ponder. "No," she decided. "Barbie of Swan Lake."
Alice looked at me blankly. We knew about the common Disney characters from the ads on TV, but the newfangled ones were alien to us. However, Nessie knew what she was doing. After a few minutes of silent searching, she pulled out a frilly pink ballet tutu. It was the type that made me gag on sight – I began to seriously contemplate leaving the room.
"Want me to help you in, Nessie?" asked Alice, reaching for the tutu.
Nessie shook her head, and put her hand on Alice's cheek. Alice closed her eyes and they both grew still for a moment. Then Nessie broke away and Alice's eyes popped open wide. "No way, Nessie," she said firmly. "Don't do that. You can dress me."
Nessie shook her head, and Alice looked positively alarmed. "Ness, that's really not a good idea!" she warned.
"What?" I asked, and they both looked at me in surprise, as if they'd forgotten I was there.
"Nothing," Alice said quickly, but we heard a sniffle from Nessie and tears began to flow from her eyes. "Oh, honey!" she exclaimed, sweeping her onto her lap and turning to glare at me.
"What did I do?" I asked in bewilderment. This was getting insane.
Her look turned crafty. "Nothing. It's what you wouldn't do."
"What wouldn't I do?" I said, becoming frustrated. Only a female would say something like that!
"Since you wouldn't do it, it doesn't matter," she said, turning away to comfort Nessie. I could tell by her expression that she had a trick up her sleeve, but the sight of tears – something I hadn't seen in a hundred years – made me desperate.
"Okay, okay, I'll do it, whatever it is."
Nessie's tears dissolved, and she looked up at me as if I was her greatest hero of all time. She jumped out of Alice's arms and hugged my leg. Man, that kid sure could be cute sometimes …
But then she ran back to the toy chest, and brought over the frilly tutu. She tugged me down and put her little hand eagerly on my cheek. The image that rushed into me froze me like a statue.
For I was the one dressed in the tutu.