DISCLAIMER: Stephanie Meyer owns the Twilight universe AUTHOR'S NOTE: Thanks to everyone who reviewed. You guys are amazing!

AUTHOR'S NOTE: This was orig. one chapter but it was just so long that I put it in two seperate ones. Good news is that I will post the second half tomorrow. I hope everyone likes it so far. :-)

-BPOV-
I woke up with a headache and my stomach felt queasy. I didn't even want to open my eyes yet. I had slept even worse than usual.

Charlie knocked on my door.

"Wanna go to the diner for breakfast kiddo?" I groaned. Food had become the F word with me recently but I couldn't disappoint my dad.

"Sure." I croaked carefully.

There was shuffling of feet on the other side of the door and then silence.

"You okay Bells?" Charlie asked through the door, sounding worried.

I closed my eyes and drapped my arm over my forehead. No! I groaned in my head.

"Yeah." I called instead. "Let me get ready and then I'll meet you at the diner."

"Alright... are you sure you're okay?"

I grunted getting out of bed.

When Charlie was gone I padded my way down the hallway to the bathroom for a shower. Maybe that would help.

---

When I arrived at the diner I looked around for my dad. I finally spotted him drinking a cup of coffee at one of the corner tables. I smiled and waved but he didn't see me. He was talking to someone who had their back turned towards me. I didn't think too much of it. Charlie was the police chief in the little town of Forks. There wasn't a resident here that he didn't know personally. It had made starting high school here fun. Let me tell you.

I started to make my way to the table but was sidetrack by a waitress I remembered from when Charlie and I would come here before I moved back to Arizona.

"Bella. Is that you Hun?"

I smiled and gave her a hug.

"How are you Becky?"

"I'm doing fine. Same old, same old; working away. You here visiting you dad?" She asked conversationally.

I forced a smile and nodded.

"That's good Hun. He's missed you."

My smile froze on my face as a wave of guilt rolled through me, starting in the pit of my stomach.

As I arrived at the corner table Charlie finally saw me and looked to me with a relaxed smile before turning his attention back to who he had been speaking to. The girl turned around to see who Charlie was looking at and squealed.

"Bella!"

I sucked in a breath. Seeing my closest childhood friend should be good and I was happy to see Alice but I knew that there was no changing my mind now. I wouldn't even be able to stall as I know I would have without this chance meeting. But I would find the person I had come looking for soon enough now that I had run into his sister. As a matter of fact I wouldn't be surprised in the least if he came looking for me now.

"Hey Alice." I greeted as calmly as I could.

She gave me a big squeeze and I patted her back. I really had missed her. I had missed all of my friends from Forks. I might be living in Arizona now but a part of me would always be here, in this little drizzling dreary town.

"What have you been up to?" She asked, eyes sparkling as she patted the seat next to her. "Anything new?"

I cringed but smoothed my features as quickly as I could. She raised a perfectly sculpted eyebrow at me and I smiled what I hoped was an innocent smile.

"Nothing much." I lied, taking the seat.

"She's here visiting her old man." Charlie bragged. "Before she starts college in the fall. Going to Harvard, aren't ya Honey?"

I looked down at the table top. Would I ever get used to this guilt? Charlie had been so excited that I had gotten into Harvard. It was all he talked about when I called home. It hadn't bothered me at first. Hell, at first I was as excited as he was. ... Things change.

I sighed. I suppose the sooner I got this over with the better. Maybe if I let him in on the smallest matter than I could kind of ease him into this.
Yeah. Right.

"Maybe." I said quietly, secretly hoping that he wouldn't hear me.

No chance of that. Charlie looked up from his coffee with a look of surprise and confusion.

"What do you mean, 'maybe?'" He asked.

I shrugged.

"You did get in Bella." He said. "I should know. I already sent the tuition."

I cringed. Tears were starting to form in my eyes already. God. If it was this hard telling him that I might be going to college in the fall how was I going to tell him the real news?

"I just don't know how things are going to work out Dad." I whispered and my voice sounded chocked, even to me.

Charlie chuckled and patted the back of my hand.

"You're just nervous Bells. It's all going to be okay. You'll do great!"

I bit my lip and moved my hand out from under his. If he only knew.

I looked up and tried my hardest to smile.

"Thanks Dad."

Charlie smiled back and picked up his coffee mug again, feeling proud of himself because for him at least the problem was solved.

I couldn't look at him anymore so I looked away, only to face Alice, who was watching me with a critical eye. She was going to be more difficult.

----

I had left the diner as soon as I could without seeming rude. Alice remained sitting at the table watching me as if she already knew my little secret. I almost wished she did. It would be so much easier if I had someone to talk to about this. The only one I had to talk to was Renee and she wasn't the best to confide in. she was upset, disappoint, and hurt... just like I knew she would be. But I did need someone to talk to.

I drove a little ways from the diner and pulled onto the side of the road, pulling out my cell phone as soon as the break was on.

She picked up the phone on the second ring.

"Bella! What's wrong? Is everything okay? Did you tell him? Did you tell Charlie?"

I exhaled in a shaky breath.

"I can't." I croaked.

There was silence from the other end of the phone for an immeasurable amount of time.

"Mom?" I prompted. I had begun to shift nervously in my seat. I just wanted someone to tell me what I should do.

"I'm sorry Baby. But you have to."

I closed my eyes and leaned my head against the back of my seat.

"I know." I sighed.

"Bella. He deserves to know."

I nodded without opening my eyes and then realized she couldn't see me.

"I know."

"Bella... I have to go now but you have to tell him. You know that. And the sooner the better."

I took a deep breath.

"I know."

"Bella...."

"I know." I said with more feeling. "Really. I will tell him the first time I see him."

There was silence again.

"You haven't seen him yet?"

I picked at the steering wheel.

"No." I said eventually. The feeling in my stomach so surpassed butterflies that I didn't even know how to describe it.

I sat, debating, for a moment before I sighed.

"I saw Alice though." I said finally. "So I'll be seeing him before I know it."

"It's really going to be okay Baby." Renee said. I wanted to believe her. I really did.

But I didn't.

"Thanks Mom."

"I love you Bella. Call me as soon as you tell Edward please."

"I love you too. I will."

I was about to hang up when Renee cleared her throat.

"And Bella... you need to tell Charlie too."

Bile was raising in my throat.

"One at a time Mom." I got out before hanging up the phone so that I could promptly empty all the contents of my stomach onto the side of the road.

My phone vibrated in my pocket just as I was wiping my mouth.

"Hello?" I picked up without thinking, fearing it was Charlie and he would come searching for me if I didn't pick up. He wouldn't have to look far either.

"Alice said you were back. Is that true?"

I almost dropped my phone as I was assaulted by the smoothest, butter silk type voice I had ever heard.

"Bella?" I took a deep breath.

"Hello Edward." I said, and then cleared my throat. I wasn't sure if it was nervousness, surprise, or the fact that I had just been barfing a mere minute ago that made my voice waver. Probably all of the above.

"News sure travels fast here doesn't it?" I joked pitifully. "I always forget that."

There was silence that fell so heavily that it was nearly deafening.

"I've missed you."

I squeezed my eyes shut against the tears. Dear god, I was crying a lot lately. Not that I didn't have reason.

"I've missed you too." I whispered honestly. He would never truly know how much I had missed him in the month or two we had been apart. Missed him to the extent that it physically hurt.

"Why didn't you call me back then?"

I tried so hard not to hear the hurt in his voice.

"You're right." he said.

I jerked in surprise by the sudden relief from the silence. I hadn't even realized no one had been speaking until that point.

Before I could ask what I was right about he spoke again.

"This isn't a conversation I wish to have over the telephone. Where are you? May I come and talk to you in person?"

I shook my head.

"No. i'll come to you." I said finally. There was no way we were going to have this conversation on the side of some random road in the middle of Forks.... beside a sizable pile of my body fluids. We were going to have to have this discussion soon wnough and I knew Edward too well to think he would drop this before he got his answer. I might as well get it over with, rip the band aid off quickly and all that crap. I call it crap because what they always fail to mention is that pulling the bad aid off stings and sometimes the pain even lingers for a while.

"Are you home?" I asked nervously.

"I just got back from a run." He said. "I'll see you soon."

"See you soon."

And then he hung up.

I got back in the car and pulled my seat belt on. I checked my rear view mirror twice. Three times. I adjusted my side mirrors. Who am I kidding? I even adjusted my heater vents and changed CDs before I finally got up the nerve to even start the car. And then I was driving towards a very familiar house.

----

I had practically lived with the Cullen's during that year I lived in Forks. I was always with Alice and Rose. They were so much more than my friends for that year as I was trying to adjust to a new town and a new school. They were more like my sisters. Still are.
We had parties every weekend, Rose and Alice's doing of course. I had never been a fan of those crazy weekends but I held them dear to me because neither was Edward, Alice's brother. And so we would spend the evenings together, talking for hours. Sometimes I would lay on the black futon he had in the corner of his room and he would read to me over the music that would thump through the floor from downstairs. Alice and Rose thought I was pitiful because I would rather sit, listening to classics with Edward, rather than dance with a couple of hott seniors. I think eventually they realized I would rather be anywhere Edward was. And then they spent every weekend trying to get us together.

None of their ridicules plans worked; I was too afraid. Too afraid he didn't like me like I liked him. Afraid that it wouldn't work out and I would lose his friendship. So I remained the closest of friends with Edward... until that day a couple of months ago when he came to visit me in Arizona.

I jumped as someone knocked on my window. I hadn't even realized I was at the Cullen's house. I had driven on autopilot obviously and I had been sitting here in their driveway for I don't know how long.
I wasn't sure if I was relieved or depressed by the fact that it was not Edward standing there smiling down at me, but Emmett, Edward and Alice's older brother.

I forced a smile onto my face and rolled the window down.

"Hey Em."

Emmett was the big brother I had never had. Most people were scared to death of him because he was slightly.... okay, he was gargantuan. Not fat but very tall and very fit. But I knew he was just a big teddy bear.

Emmett's smile widened, if that was possible.

"Bellsy!" he called excitedly.

I laughed.

"I didn't know you were back in town." He stated.

I nodded.

"Have you seen Alice or Rose yet? They're going to freak!"

I grinned a little to myself. It was good to know I had been missed. I just hoped they all still liked me after I shared my news with them.

"I've missed them too." I said with feeling.

Emmett smirked.

"I see." He said, feigning hurt. "I see how much you've missed me."

I rolled my eyes.

"Of course I have missed you Em." I said. ".... Just not as much as I have missed Alice and Rosalie."

His head fell back as he released one of his patented belly laughs, the ones that are so contagious you can't help but to laugh along.

"Well, does Eddie bot know you're back?" He grinned and leaned a little closer to the open window. "He has been moping around the house since you left."

I rolled my eyes again even though as he said this the fleet of butterflies were back in my stomach full force.

"I moved back to Arizona three years okay." I reminded him, smirking.

Emmett winked.

"I know it! And the only time he laughs or smiles is when you come back for your little visits. It's actually very sad really for someone to be so whipped when you aren't even together."

I really wasn't ready to get out of the car because that meant I would have to go inside the house. And then I would have to talk to Edward. And then everything was going to change between us.

But I didn't want to stay in that car to continue this conversation with Emmett either so I opened the door, whacking Emmett in the knees with the heavy metal door in the process. It didn't seem to faze him.

"I've always wondered why that was by the way." He continued as he walked with me up to the front door.

"Why you guys aren't together that is."

I didn't say anything, I just shrugged.

"I mean you guys are like Will and Jada, Princess Laya and Hon Solo, Ross and Rachel."

I laughed.

"You are such a dork."

Emmett shrugged.

"I call them as I see them little sister."

I stood on the bottom stair of the stair case.

"You said Edward was in his room?" I prompted.

Emmett chuckled.

"I didn't actually. But yes, he is."

I waved over my shoulder as I walked up the stairs. Slowly. Preying that I didn't fall.

The trip to Edward's room felt like an eternity and a mili-second all at once and I wasn't sure if I wanted to bust through the door without hesitating just so that I could see him again or if I wanted to go back downstairs and walk up a second time, just to stall.

I took a deep breath as I rounded the corner, preparing myself to knock. But as it turned out I didn't have to because the door was open and Edward was resting against the door frame waiting for me.

"Bella." He greeted, a hint of a smile pulling his lips up on one side.

I felt my own lips twist up into a smile despite the thousands of emotions that were swirling through me.

"Hi." I said quietly.

Edward broke into a real grin, his amazing green eyes crinkling just the tiniest bit at the corners, and pushed off the door frame. He wrapped me into a tight hug and I closed my eyes unintentionally.

"I missed you." He whispered against my hair.

"I missed you too."

He pulled away and looked into my eyes as if he was searching for something there.

"I was worried." He said after a moment and I nodded although I didn't know what he had to worry about.

"You never called me back and after the last time I saw you...." He trailed off, his brows creasing.

I bit my lip.

"I'm sorry." I said, looking to the floor. And I was sorry I hadn't called him back but I had been too confused.

Edward hugged me again, even tighter this time, like he was scared I was going to disappear again.

"You don't hate me now do you?" He asked hesitantly.

I pulled away from him as if he had burned me.

"How could you think that?" I asked, frowning.

He refused to look at me.

"Well, when someone spontaneously flies to Arizona to tell someone that they want more than friendship. That they have feelings for the other, and always have and then they don't hear from that person for another month, three weeks, and two days it causes some doubt."

My eyes were brimming over with tears. There were so many conflicting emotions coursing through me that I didn't know whether I wanted to kiss him or hit him.

"I'm sorry." I said again, sniffling.

"Sshh. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have upset you."

Edward grabbed my hand and led me to the familiar black sofa sitting in the corner of the spacious room.

I sat down and rubbed my eyes. He sat a safe distance away from me, rubbing soothing circles in my back.

"I was just confused." I admitted sheepishly.

The soothing circles stopped for a moment but then he continued.

"Confused?" He repeated. "As in confused about how you feel? Do you regret me coming to Arizona?"

I shook my head without hesitating. I wouldn't change Edward telling me how he felt for anything. There were many things I would change if I were given the chance, like giving me more self control, but never his confession.

I will never forget how cute he looked, all anxious and nervous, pacing back and forth in front of me while running his hands through his tussled hair. I stopped myself before I got myself in trouble. I needed to stay in the moment now. There were more important things to focus on.

"No." I said, still refusing to look at him. "No. I was confused about a lot of things. I mean you live all the way over here in Forks and I live in Arizona with Mom and Phil and I don't have a lot of experience with relationships.... okay, none. I have no experience with relationships. And it was the last month of senior year and I was stressed out and then"

I stopped myself before I said more than I had meant to. If I was going to talk about that with him I needed it to be on my terms.

Edward sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"Why didn't you talk to me about all of this?" he asked and I shrugged.

I had always intended to call him back. Once I got everything figured out. Things just don't always work out the way you plan them.

He looked at me and there was so much torture on his face, his eyes, that it almost killed me.

"I'm sorry." I said for what seemed like the thousandth time.

Edward pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Stop saying that!" He snapped and then took a deep breath. "Please."

I looked down at my hands.

"So it took you all this time to figure everything out?" he asked in the quiet and I swallowed around the lump in my throat.

I shook my head.

"No...yes. I don't know."

Edward closed his eyes and leaned his head against the back of the sofa.

"It sounds as if you are still a little confused."

"I am." I admitted.

"Confused as to how we are going to make this work. Or confused as in you aren't sure you want to try?" He asked.

His tone was careful as if he was truly scared of my reply.

I fiddled with my fingers on my lap, twinning them together and pulling them apart. This was it.

"There was never any doubt in my mind that I want to be with you Edward." I said truthfully and I was slightly proud of myself for how even my tone came out even I was so monumentally nervous.

Edward looked up and I caught a glint in his eyes before I turned away.

"But there's something I need to tell you something before you say anything." I continued.

Edward put his thumb under my chin and turned my head to look at him.

"I want to be with you too Bella so what ever you have to say we can work through it. Because I lo"

"I'm pregnant." I spit out.

I wanted so desperately to close my eyes tight and never open them again but I made myself keep eye contact.

Edward remained impeccably still, almost like stone, his brow furrowed as if he was sure he had heard wrong. His eyes flickered downward to my stomach and back up to my face so quickly I almost didn't catch it.

"Wh.... what did you just say?"

I blinked around the tears forming in my eyes and rested my hands on my flat stomach. It was the first time I had allowed myself to do so since I had arrived in Forks.

"Four weeks after you visited me in Arizona I found out I was pregnant." I repeated.

Edward dropped his hand from my face and stared at where my hands were resting on my stomach. He didn't say anything for so long that I started to doubt if this was the right thing to do.

"Are you sure?" I nodded.

"I found out the day before graduation. I was going to call you back but then I found out I was pregnant and then there was graduation and then I had to tell Renee and then I spent the next couple of weeks freaking out and planning to come out here and tell you."

I took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

"I didn't figure this was something I could tell you over the phone."

Edward didn't say anything and he hadn't looked away from my hand gently resting on my stomach. I hadn't actually noticed they were still there and I subconsciously moved them to my lap.

Edward shook his head as if that was going to clear it or let the news settle in better. He looked back to my face.

"What? I. Oh my god." He mumbled.

I let out a shaky laugh but there was no hint of humor in it at all.

"Tell me about it." I said.

He still didn't say anything. I chewed on my lip. Never in my best imaginings had I thought he would jump for joy and kiss me, telling me this was the happiest moment of his life. Maybe if we had done this the way we were supposed to. Maybe if we were a happily married couple that had at least talked about children but that wasn't the way it was going to work out now. And I had thought I was okay with that.

I tried desperately not to be offended by his silence. I knew this was a lot to take in. I had had a month to get used to the idea and I was still beyond confused and freaked out.... but it hurt none the less.

"I'm just going to go now." I said quietly.

Edward looked at me like he had completely forgotten I was still here.

"I'm. I'm sorry. I just need a little while to think." He said and I nodded.

I knew exactly what he meant.

"What are you going to do?" he asked suddenly just as I was getting up off of the sofa.

I looked at him with my eyebrows furrowed. How do you sum up something like that in one sentence? One conversation? Unless he meant.

"I'm going to keep it!" I said, anxiety creeping over me. I had never imagined he would be elated but I had failed to ever imagine what would happen if he didn't want me to keep it either.

"That... The alternative is not even an option for me." I said, bile raising in my throat.

I may not have planned this and I may be lost and scared beyond anything I had ever experienced but I would never be able to actually get rid of it.

Edward looked at me and nodded.

"Good." he said so quietly I wasn't sure if I had even heard him correctly.

I decided not to press matters because if it turned out that wasn't what he had said I was almost positive it would kill me.

Edward sighed and leaned over so that we were eye level. He brushed his thumb over my cheek where a tear had fallen unbeknown to me.

"I don't know what to say Bella." He sighed, looking helpless.

I bit my lip and nodded.

"This isn't something I was prepared for... at all. I just."

He closed his eyes and shook his head.

"I just don't know what to say. I need some time to think."

I nodded and another tear fell. I got up and walked silently to the door.

"I always intended to call you Edward. I just...." I trailed off because there was no more to say.

He nodded but made no move to get up.

"I don't know what I'm going to do yet but for the moment I'm staying at Charlie's." I told him. "If you want to talk."

"I'm sorry." He whispered as I closed the door.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: So Edward knows now. Please don't judge this story until you've read at least the next chapter. Because I know there's a lot of stories out there like this but I'd like to think there's a unique aspect to it. Thanks to everyone that's going to give it a chance. Review please! I can't wait to see what everyone thinks of it.

Here's some things you should know:

Edward, Alice, and Emmett are siblings. Jasper and Rosalie are siblings. It's all canon pairings. Everyone except BxE are together at the moment. It's a tiny bit OOC, ie... Rose and Bella are good friends. I've always seen it that if they were both human there wouldn't be any reason for them not to be. Everything else will be explained in the next couple of chapters. Thanks guys!