How long could it have been? A feeling washed over him. But how. The dead don't have feelings. And the dead don't come back to life. There was no movement so he had to be dead. No sound or sight. No sent hung in the air. It was nothing but darkness and void. Where could a feeling come from. Such a creature was unfeeling from the start.
Time was all there was. Time sitting here trying to figure out something. He couldn't accept he wasn't dead. He had attacked Aizen. He knew he would die for it but he did what he needed and it meant Rangiku was safe. That was all that mattered. She was all that mattered. Gin was ready to die happy as long as that joy was there.
Only when he saw some shade of light come past his lids did he start to accept he wasn't dead. Not fully but it was a start. Slowly other things started to come into focus. Soft sounds, more light, his own body becoming aware he was breathing. The light soon become too intense to handle. Yet his body didn't respond to his want to turn away from the light or voice to turn it off. All he could see was white and light behind his lids.
It must have been days now since the feelings started coming in. Bit by bit he felt a little more of his body. A small twitch of his finger, then hand into an arm. The twitch moved to touch every part of him and every bit that was touched regain feeling. At long last Gin could pry open his eyes and turn away from the blinding whiteness. An attempt to rub his eyes with his hand failed and it became clear why.
A form started to come into his view as the light dimmed in his eyes. Tall, voluptuous, hair below what he could see. No it couldn't be. How? There was no way he was in such a world as heaven. The form had a sweet voice of worry. The warm hand touched his face and moved in closer. She was safe. It was real. A smile touched his lips as much as he could manage.
"Rangiku…"
Gin murmured the name as the woman leaned in. Just as it felt as if a world of promise was going to be given to him it reeled away. As the face came into focus he saw a frown. Why would she frown? No please don't cry, Rangiku.
"Gin…You don't know…who I am?"
He felt a tear on him as he hand was still held. The voice and face became clear as a bell. A broken face he had almost forgotten. Is that the only reason he had given into her? A reminder of what he messed up and could have. He turned his head away not able to face her. Why would she have saved him.
"…Namine…ya shoulda left meh…"