"Possibly... mini golf."
-prompter

I was sitting at the bar in Cafe Nowhere, stirring my iced coca-cola with my bendy straw, when Murasaki the Megane burst in, apparently with big news. At least he made it seem that way because he made a big point to gather everyone in Hamatora (except Nice-kun, who was out on official business with Inspector Art) before he could start, but when he began his big spiel with, "So as we all know, Nice's birthday is coming up," I became bored already.

Last year's birthday celebration for Nice-kun had been a big surprise party that, while it had began in good fun, ended with an obnoxiously inebriated Nice-kun and not enough snacks. To be frank, it was fun until Nice-kun went on a rampage and tried to "out-eat and out-drink everyone combined!" those being his exact words at the time. This year, I couldn't imagine anyone coming up with much better of an idea, so I felt a bit pessimistic. Regardless, Murasaki continued.

"Right now Nice is out being distracted by Art, who is in on our plan and facilitating this discussion." So that was what that was all about. "Anyway, I know last year's celebration turned out to be a bit too much." Well that was an understatement but I could get on board with it anyway. "So this year I was thinking we should tone it down and try something a little different." He waited to see everyone nod their approval before going on. "I thought if we went out to do something, that would be an easy way to monitor ourselves by default." I saw what he was getting at. You can't get blackout drunk in public. "The only thing is, what activity can we all enjoy together in celebration of Nice's birthday?" Indeed. "So I did some groundwork and found out a couple things Nice likes to do on his days off." Everyone gathered seemed to listen closer when he said that. What was it? What's Nice-kun like? "So here's what I found out." The suspense was killing me- "Mini golf." His conclusion felt only slightly anticlimactic. He went on to explain this "great" place nearby that we could all go play mini golf at. It didn't sound like such a terrible idea, and if Nice-kun was into that, none of us could complain. It was settled.

When the day came around, we all collected Nice-kun and ferried him to the mini-golf site in high spirits. I'd never done anything like it before, to be honest, so I got excited about the little details like picking your ball color. Because it was his birthday, Nice-kun got first pick: the pink ball. Because my name was Birthday, I decided to choose second: the red ball. We even got a discount because we came with a big group. We were all talking amongst each other and having a good time as we moved to the first putt. It was easy, you just hit the ball in a straight line and... it went in. Only Ratio, who hit the ball too hard the first few times, seemed to have trouble with it. It wasn't until we got to the third putt that I realized this wasn't going to be all fun and games. Nice-kun fucked it up first. He actually got his ball stuck in one of those traps they put just to screw you over, and he had to get an employee to get it out. Everyone laughed at him. I'll admit without shame that I laughed hardest. Anyway, he was kind of cross after that and since he was the birthday boy, I took it upon myself to cheer him up. While everyone in our group was taking their turns at the next hole, I stole over to Nice-kun's side. He was standing very close to Art-kun, so I ended up talking to the two of them at the same time.

"Hey, Nice-kun," I breathed towards him, just barely catching their attention, but when he made eye contact I was able to communicate to him sufficiently what I meant. "You feeeeling ok?"

Exchanging glances with Art, Nice leaned over to include Hajime, "Hey, Birthday and Art and I all have to piss real bad, so we're just gonna run to the little boy's room real quick. What about you?" He ventured to wink at her, and she picked up the vibe quick enough. She briefly informed Koneko about our planned absence, and then the four of us scurried away, ducking behind fancy rock formations as we went and hiding ourselves behind the streams of too-blue running water and fake plants. We quickly found a little spot on the rocks hidden behind some stuff where we could do whatever without being seen.

"Happy birthday, Nice-kun, now we're going to celebrate properly." As I spoke I lifted my sunglasses from my face and placed them on that of Nice-kun, the birthday boy. Now it was his time to shine. I had assumed the responsibility of bringing the weed, so I pulled out my drug pouch with pride and procured from it the joint I had rolled earlier with this moment tenderly in mind.

Nice took the first hit of course, and as I watched the creamy cloud of smoke emerge from his parted lips I realized how good it felt to be there. He passed it off to Art next, so we continued clockwise, with me and then Hajime, who took the longest hit of all of us. Art seemed particularly shocked by the size of the cloud of smoke she released, but the falling water around us helped it all evaporate into the air without much of a trace. I was impressed, vaguely recognizing that this spot was way more favorable for smoking weed than some porto-potty, but decided not to dwell on that. The place smelled strongly of chlorine and as we got more high we all started noticing it more. We were all just commenting to each other how surreal and even a bit garish the décor seemed, what with the ultra-bright blue and green, when I figured we should make our way back to the group. I had rolled multiple joints just in case, but we all seemed to feel so good after the first one that I decided I should save the others for later. It was better this way. We clambered out of our little alcove and Art sprayed some cologne over us to disperse the air of ganja. I noticed that he was definitely the kind of guy who would cover that detail. We all murmured our appreciation and started back.

I'm not exactly proud to admit that we got lost and had to have an employee direct us back through the course until we found our group again, but when we got back for good, we were well-received and continued making our putts with ease. I thought I must be better at it because I'm high, but Art seemed to become way less accurate, so it must depend on the person. Art is a cute guy. When he gets high, he wears his heart on his sleeve, and that's always fun. I watched Nice tease Art as he missed the hole for a seventh time, and grinned at the color it brought to his cheeks. Everyone was just standing around and talking as Nice tried to help Art get the damn ball in the hole. He even did the cliché wrap-your-arms-around-the-person thing to help him swing the damn club. It was a real scream, but I noticed I was the only one paying such close attention, so I downplayed my reactions like I always have to do when I'm having a good time. When the thing finally happened, we all moved on, groaning about Inspector Art slowing us down, which seemed to please Nice-kun. Well good. It was his birthday.

It wasn't long before we got to the final hole, perhaps one of the most intense things I think I've borne witness to in my short life. The course was all curvy and you had to bounce the ball off of things at certain angles to continue correctly. I took one look at it and figured I was fucked, but Koneko made a valiant effort that put all of us to shame, and left us shaking in our boots. We were all inspired, and fought on... in vain, for the most part. Nice-kun and Hajime were tied for least number of putts (5 each) when Art-kun, last to take his turn, stepped up. We were all watching and waiting for him to fuck up as he visibly braced himself and took the first swing. And that was the only swing necessary. I shit you not, like in a fucking movie, the ball went perfectly around every bend and bounce and literally made its way unaided through the course until it rolled neatly into the hole with an unquiet thunk. I think I'm justified in saying we all pissed ourselves in shock. I guess I was mad as hell, but it was too uncanny to take seriously. Weird shit happens when I'm high, I swear.

So after that, while everyone else went to eat at the food court area provided by the establishment, Nice-kun Art-kun Hajime and I, aka the Fantastic Four, snuck off again for another hit. The second joint went quickly, and we all wanted to return soon anyway to eat with everyone else. Our group took up about three tables, which was cool. We looked like a force to be reckoned with. I was sitting across from Nice-kun eating a hot dog when I remembered I wanted to ask him something.

"So Nice-kun, you mini-golf a lot in your free time?" He was still wearing my sunglasses from earlier and I instinctively moved my hand up to my face to adjust them. Shit. I'm a creature of habit.

"What would make you think that?" Nice-kun responded to my question in a way I hadn't expected him to.

"So you don't?" I tried to stop myself from frowning a bit.

"Well, now that you mention it, I don't think I've ever been mini-golfing before." He looked at me frankly and I felt rage entering my nostrils and seeping down into my throat like mucus. I turned to stare daggers at Murasaki. What fucking groundwork did he do? I thought he said he'd found something Nice-kun liked to do, not something Nice-kun had never done before? Anyway, I realized Murasaki was a douche bag, and I was never going to trust him again for birthday plans. I guess we were all just lucky it had been a success...

"Nevermind, then," I faked another smile to Nice and played it off like my question had meant nothing. He was too busy engaging with Art the whole time for me to keep his focus for too long anyway. They seemed to be really into each other, I thought. I gazed off in another direction so they could carry on unobserved and made eye contact with Ratio from across two tables.

'Hey,' I mouthed and winked at him. He made some kind of expression that seemed somewhat smug, somewhat warm, and somewhat dismissive at the same time. I didn't really understand him all the time but I figured I could jive with him regardless. He was my partner, after all. I stood to move over and sit next to him, inserting myself between him and Honey and slinging my arm around his neck. I kind of mentioned to him how high I was and how cool the golfing had been. He only agreed that golfing was a good experience, and I wondered if he wanted to get high too. I asked him if he wanted to get high too. He gave an evasive answer so I took him to the bathroom to smoke him up, poor guy. I felt a little bad because he's my friend and I should have his back, but it wasn't so bad. We squeezed into a stall together and got busy. There were fans in the place, too, so we didn't even leave it that smoky.

Upon returning, I hit Art up for his cologne which Ratio and I applied generously, and after that almost everyone was ready to go. We stopped at McDunnel's on the way back to Cafe Nowhere and feasted like sad broke people. The whole thing then turned into a weird coed slumber party when we all curled up on the hardwood floors with blankets and pillows and just got ready to sleep. I don't remember who started it, but it became a thing. Somehow booze got involved too, probably Gasquet's doing, and before I knew it I was flying high. I recall leaning against Ratio's chest as I led a group toast to Nice-kun's day of birth. Then we all fell into the expected singing of "Happy Birthday to You" and Nice-kun turned off all the lights in place of blowing out candles because "I need a birthday wish even if I don't have candles to blow out!"

I fell asleep at some point and had dreams of getting high in various places and golfing in wild settings. I recall the scent of Art's cologne clearly.

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