"How did your last mission go?" she asked, taking a seat in the chair next to him. "You usually mention to me how many Cylons you've killed within the first twenty-four hours of finishing an op."

"I only killed one," Lee said, setting down his coffee cup.

Kara could feel the seriousness enter the room as the small smile that had been on his face vanished. "Did I say something wrong?"

"No. In fact, my last mission was actually part of why I wanted to come see you in person. It put a lot of things into perspective, and I figured that you wouldn't want to hear the news from talk radio or something stupid like that."

Kara set down her mug and took a deep breath before looking up at him. "You're starting to scare me, Lee, so I'm not sure I should even ask. But I will. What news?"

"Cally received a tip about a week ago to what the last Cylon human replica model looked like."

"Then you know all twelve?"

"Correct. It makes my job a lot easier to finish."

"So then what's the problem? You should be ecstatic."

He shook his head. "You're not paying attention, Kara. I said that Cally received a tip. Cally. Doesn't that seem odd to you?"

Her eyes lit up with horror. "Oh my gods. Did something happen to Cally?"

"No," Lee said shaking his head emphatically. "I wouldn't have let her within one thousand yards of anything that would be dangerous."

"Oh, that's right. I forgot that you two were involved."

"Don't be like that. Cally is the only person who really gets what drives me to keep hunting down Cylons."

Kara looked down at her hands and mumbled, "What about me? I thought I got you."

"You're not around when I need you."

Her head shot up, and she knew no matter how hard she tried, the pain wouldn't leave her eyes. "Wow."

"I didn't mean it like that. I just meant that you're here on Caprica. The military takes me to some out of reach areas. I can't always be calling you or writing you when I need to hear that it's okay and that I'll make it through the day." He reached out and grasped her hand in his as he looked at her seriously. "There are so many times when I wish it was you flying as my wingman or playing triad with me during the downtime. If I could, I would have you by my side."

As much as the words made her want to break out into a wide smile, they also made her want to cry. They both knew that she couldn't fly with him anymore. It was a stupid pipedream, and it hurt to know that they both had it.

It also hurt to know that he wanted her by his side as Starbuck, the greatest pilot and triad player in the Twelve Colonies. He didn't want Kara Thrace, his best friend and the royal frak-up.

"We got off track," she pointed out pulling her hand away from him and grabbing the cup to take another drink. "You were telling me how odd it was that Cally got the tip and not one of you pilots."

"Well, it wasn't necessarily odd. It just sent off red flags that this wasn't going to be another target-lock-shoot kind of mission."

Lee sighed and stood up. Kara watched as he poured a good amount of ambrosia into his empty mug and quickly swallowed it all. "That bad?" she said, knowing that the fear was rising in her voice. Lee never beat around the subject. The last time he acted like this had been to tell her that his mother, the woman who had watched over Kara when her youngest son got killed, had died from cancer. She couldn't imagine that what he had to say could be as bad as it was that day.

He walked over to stand beside where she sat. "It was Galen Tyrol. He contacted Cally because he thought it wouldn't seem out of the ordinary. He was her old boss, and they still talked at least a few times a week no matter how remote a location we were stationed in at the time."

"The Chief was the one that tipped you off? Last I heard he was trying to live the easy life with Sharon on their little farm on Aquaria. When does he have time to flush out Cylons?"

Her joke didn't make him laugh, which meant this really was serious.

"Kara. I've been thinking this over and over in my head for the past twenty-four hours, and I can't come up with one way to ease the blow. So, I'm just going to say it, and you'll have to forgive me." He sighed and grabbed her hand, ignoring the fact that she was trying to pull away. "It was Sharon."

"What was Sharon?"

"The Twelfth Cylon Model. It was Sharon."

"What do you mean 'was', Lee?"

"I tried to take her into custody, Kara. I swear to the gods, I tried my best. But I just couldn't. She took the life of a civilian, and I had to take her down."

"Then you didn't try hard enough. Sharon wouldn't have killed an innocent unless she had to. She's not that kind of person."

"She's a machine."

"She is not," Kara hissed, finally yanking her hand away from him. "You take that back. Sharon Valerii is an honorable veteran of the Twelve Colonies. She would not kill someone unless she was forced to. And then it would only be because they threatened her first. It's the way we were taught the first day of flight school. She would never be heartless enough to do what you're implying. You must have made a mistake in assuming it was murder just like you made a mistake thinking she was a Cylon."

"She killed Galen," Lee said. She could see his lip tremble slightly. He was doing his best not to turn away from her, not to give himself the luxury of ignoring her pain. Lee was often selfless like that. And he didn't lie to her. He wouldn't make something like this up. So then it had to be true. But it made no sense.

She stared at him, mind racing from blind belief to complete doubt, as neither of them said a word. She could tell he desperately wanted to give her some sort of physical comfort to the harsh news, but she just couldn't let him. Touching him would make his words real. "I… I can't believe that."

"You can't or you won't?" he asked.

"I don't know. Boomer was one of my friends on Galactica. I helped her along when she first started. If she was a machine, I would have known."

"The Cylons are an extremely intelligent race of machines. If they didn't want you to know, there would have been no way to find out. The only reason Galen knew was because he became privy to the warning signs of a human Cylon. Sharon had been having blackouts that started shortly before the Cylons made their move to start the second war. She was an insider agent so discreet that not even she was aware."

Kara shook her head. She didn't want to think of her friend as an insider agent. She bit her lip and looked at the man sitting across from her. And suddenly she knew that there was only one solution to this. She had to let him talk. She had to know all the facts. Taking a deep breath, she rubbed the sides of her head and said, "I still don't understand what happened. Could you tell me again?"

"My unit went in. Crashdown and I were posing under the guise that we had another assignment on Aquaria. We went to visit Galen and Sharon. Crashdown was always really close with Sharon since they both got reassigned to the same Battlestar and Raptor when Galactica was decommissioned. All we were going to do when we got there was take Sharon into custody and test her to see if she really was a machine. It was going to be simple."

"Something went wrong."

"Galen couldn't stand the deception. He told her that we were coming and there was no need to be alarmed because there was no way she could be a Cylon. She agreed and then shot him point blank four times. When we arrived, he was already gone."

Kara stared at him, confused. "How did you know that was how it happened?"

"Sharon told us when we got there. Her Cylon programming had taken over, and she seemed to want to brag about fooling us for so long. I had my whole unit to watch out for, so I didn't waste time over thinking. I shot and killed her." His voice faltered slightly before he continued, "If she could kill Galen without a second glance, then there really wasn't anything human left in her. So I had to do it. There was no other option."

This time, Kara was the one to reach out for him. She took his hand in hers and pulled it to her chest. She knew that he could feel her heart beating fast from the shock of the news, and she hoped that he would understand the meaning of the action. Being close to one another had always kept them grounded throughout the years.

First, it had been after Zak's funeral. No one knew it, but that night Lee snuck through his mother's house to the side of her bed. She had been in the process of crying herself to sleep. They didn't even have to say a word. He just pulled the covers up and slipped into the bed beside her. They had cried themselves to sleep together that night, his arms gently enclosing her, her head and so much more resting on his stable shoulder.

The second time had been when the Cylons attacked humanity while they were both stationed on Galactica. That night, after doing their best to block the first wave of attacks on Caprican air space, she had found herself crying again. She couldn't imagine what it would have been like if the Cylons' plans had been able to come to fruition. Civilization would have ended.

Lee's arm dangled from the temporary bunk he had taken above her that night. She reached up to hold his hand, thinking that it would help her understand that they were still alive, that humanity was still there, without him ever having to know she used his presence for comfort. Then he squeezed her hand, and she knew that his arm hadn't unintentionally dropped down. They were thinking the same thing.

The third time was when Caroline Adama-Rose had died. This time, he just held her in his arms as she cried in the empty cemetery. Neither one of them had been able to make it to the funeral and burial for their own personal reasons. William Adama had been there, so they didn't feel guilty. Plus Caroline was never the type of person to worry about keeping up appearances. They had made it to her grave when it was the right time. When they could be there together. Where they could grieve in each others' arms.

She pulled herself away from the memories and gave him a small but brave smile. "It must have been horrible for you."

She could tell he was thrown off by her shift in sentiment. She could understand why. Sharon Valerii had been her friend and a part of her military family. She had teased Kara about how much whenever she had a spare moment during that precious time when he was stationed on Galactica, she would give Lee grief about being her superior officer. Sharon had always shown confidence in Kara and bet on Starbuck to win big in triad every single time. Kara had been the first person to whom Sharon admitted that she was in love with Galactica's Chief.

They had been friends in times of war and times of peace.

But Sharon Valerii didn't exist. She never had.

This life she was living had always had a cruel undertone to it, and Kara had been hurt too many times to not expect pain at every turn. She had loved and lost. She had flown and had her wings clipped. And she couldn't even begin to explain the pain of loving the man who was sitting in front of her right now with a look of confusion on his face.

They sat in silence for a few minutes as Kara adjusted herself to the news. They had both gotten upset arguing about it, so the moment of pause was good.

"Thank you for coming to tell me," she said when she felt like she had herself back under control and released his hand. Getting up out of her chair, she followed his lead and swallowed a glass of ambrosia as quickly as she could.

"I had this time off all of the sudden, and like I said before, I didn't want you to find out from anyone but me."

"Why all of the sudden?"

"What?"

"You said you had time off all of the sudden. I thought you said you had a military pass."

"Well, my superiors thought it would be good to give the unit leader, the lead pilot, and the crew chief some time off." When she looked at him confused, he realized that she must still be slightly dazed by what he had told her. "Crashdown, Cally, and I. They gave us downtime because of our connection to Sha- to the target. So I suddenly had a military pass. I was grateful in a way because it gave me the opportunity to finish the business I had been putting off here on Caprica. Plus I hadn't seen you or my father in too long."

"You went to see your father?"

"I stopped in. He seems to be enjoying his retirement."

"If by enjoying you mean he's crabby and complains all the time, then I believe it."

Lee let out a laugh. "It's good for him to not have the stress of running a Battlestar. He's finally able to enjoy all the things he sacrificed before."

"Like having a son who wants to know him?"

"If you're fishing for another thank you because you repaired my relationship with him, I told you two years ago I was done. I'm grateful but I refuse to be at your service for the rest of my life."

"All right. It was worth a shot." She leaned back in her chair. "So what does the old man think about the mountain man, slash homeless person look you seem to be going for?"

"My beard is not that bad."

"Says you. Why don't you shave it anyway? You never said before."

"You don't think it makes me look ruggedly handsome?"

In the back of her mind, she felt herself answering you always look ruggedly handsome. Deciding that was not the response she should actually vocalize, she tried, "If you call looking like an overgrown ape ruggedly handsome."

He chuckled. "What can I say? It helps put the people I need to get information from for an operation at ease."

"You looking like you haven't showered in days makes people feel comfortable?"

"The kind of places I go to, yes. My job is not a glamorous one."

"But it gives you a sense of purpose and accomplishment," she finished.

"I say that a lot, don't I?"

"At least twice every time I talk to you."

They lapsed into silence again, and Kara found her attention drawn to the sky outside. The stars were out. It was on nights like this that she found if she just closed her eyes and let go of everything around her, she could imagine what it was it had been like to fly a Viper through the atmosphere. The gentle pull of the universe's forces on the wing. The slight buck of being in control of such a powerful object. And the way her heart would beat fast as she pulled on the stick to make the ship roll.

Only two things made her heart beat like that. A Viper and Lee. She wasn't even going to let herself start thinking about both occurring at once. It had been hell the few days she flew with him five years ago, especially when she had almost lost him. She didn't like to remember how distracted being his wingman could make her. Or how much she really wished she still was.

"It's a nice night," Lee said, obviously noticing where her attention was even though he had no idea the direction her thoughts had been going. "Do you want to go for a walk?"

"Sure," she said, sliding out of her chair. She grabbed the sweater she had left on the counter a few days back and slid it on. When she turned to walk to the door, she noticed that Lee was standing in front of her looking surprised. "What?"

"Is that mine?"

She looked down and felt herself begin to blush. She had forgotten. "You left it behind on Galactica."

"Five years ago?"

"It was a good sweater," she insisted, knowing it sound way too defensive for him to believe that she had only kept the piece of clothing because it wasn't completely tattered and word.

"Tell me about. I went back to Atlantia and couldn't find it. I looked for weeks. Thought my bunkmate had stolen it."

"I hope the loss of it didn't cost any permanent damage."

"I got a new one eventually."

"Then you don't want the old one back?"

Lee reached out and brushed a finger along the collar and, unintentionally, her neck. The shiver that went down her spine was not an easy thing to keep Lee from noticing. "It was a nice sweater. But you can keep it."

She smiled and opened the door. "Thank you. I think I've grown attached to it."

They walked silently for the first few steps as they adjusted to the cooler temperatures of the planet.

"Kara. Can I ask you something?"

"Sure. Anything."

"How is my father doing? Really you're the only one who seems him on a regular basis."

"He's happy, I think."

"Okay. I was worried that he was just putting up a front for me. He was pretty much booted out of the military as soon as the Cylon crisis died down. I was sure that he would do something drastic."

"You thought your father was going to kill himself?" she said, staring at him wide-eyed.

He shook his head. "Gods, no. That would be too easy on all of us. I thought he would take the President of the Twelve Colonies hostage until he agreed to reinstate my father in some position that wasn't behind a desk."

"Yeah. Your father quit that stupid desk job they assigned him within days of being placed there. I don't know what they were thinking placing William "Husker" Adama behind a desk."

"He was uncomfortable at times commanding a Battlestar, and a Battlestar flies. A desk job can't do that."

"He seems happy now though," Kara said, circling back around to her original point. "He's been giving some of the small kids in his neighborhood lessons on how to fly. I think he's trying to make up for never having the chance to do that with you or Zak."

Lee smiled and went back to staring out into the night. This was one of those noticeable changes he had made through the past five years. He was no longer resentful for his father not being around as he and his brother grew up. It had been a really painful time, but Lee had forgiven his father. Kara always suspected that once he understood how important the Old Man was to the Fleet as a whole, he would understand why William Adama had such a hard time making his family his number one priority. Lee had learned the responsibilities attached to having people under your command.

It was nice, being able to talk about the father figure in both their lives and knowing it wouldn't end up in an argument filled with hurtful comments. There had been too many of those between them throughout the years.

"Tell my father that if he wants me to put in a visit in my full flight gear that I wouldn't mind."

She smiled at him. "I'll do that. I'm sure the kids will love it."

"I bet they're the envy of everyone else in their school. They have a famous Battlestar Commander teaching them how to fly. And I'm willing to bet they get guest lectures from a certain legendary Viper pilot."

"I try to put in an appearance now and then." She laughed. "I had forgotten what enthusiasm children have. They remind me of myself when I was young. All I could think of was when could I first get myself of the ground and up into that sky."

"You miss it," Lee said. It was neither a question nor a comment.

"I have other things to focus on now."

"Like?"

"Like figuring out why I can't seem to get rid of you. I have been trying for years, but you just keep coming back. I would have thought when I made sure to get my knee permanently fraked up and therefore end all chances of running into you on the job, it would have stuck. But you're too damn persistent."

Lee shook his head and started walking again. "You can never just have a serious conversation, can you? It always has to be sarcasm and biting comments."

"It's the only way I communicate," she replied, running a few steps to keep up with him.

"It's the only way we communicate," he corrected.

She grabbed his arm and pulled him to a stop. "Are you angry with me?"

"No," he said, shaking his head. "But sometimes I get a little tired of the dance we seem to always be doing."

She didn't know what to say to that. Bewildered, she let go of her grip on his arm and pulled her hands back together, unconsciously playing with the small silver band on her left thumb. It was a nervous habit. She watched as Lee's eyes dropped to the source of the movement. If it was possible, his eyes became even sadder.

"You still wear his wedding ring," Lee said, voicing the thought that was in both of their minds.

She nodded and bit her lip. It was something they never talked about. She had never told him why, and he had never asked. He still wasn't going to ask. She knew that.

But suddenly she wanted to tell him.

"I put it on the day after Zak's funeral. I woke up and couldn't remember what he looked like. I felt completely lost, and that was not something I was used to after years of having Zak beside me. Now I understand that it was probably just a mild panic attack at the idea of never being able to see the man I loved alive with my own eyes again. And if my memory does become a little hazy some days, I have photographs to look at. So it's not like I could ever forget Zak."

"Kara, you don't have to explain. You don't owe me anything."

She ignored him. "So I put the ring on to remind myself that even if I forgot what he looked like, I would always remember the way he made me feel. I didn't know before what it was like to feel so… so…"

"Loved? Special?" Lee offered. His words sounded hollow.

She shook her head. "Wanted. He made me feel wanted."

"I understand where you're going with this."

"No, you really don't. In time, I came to understand that those feelings he had awoken in me weren't going to fade. I still felt wanted by the people around me on Galactica. He had taught me how to be happy even after he was out of my life. He was gone, but I still had a home."

"You still kept the ring on, though" Lee said quietly. "I saw you wearing it during my stay."

"I wore it to remind me of my mistake. I let someone in close to me, and I lost them. I forgot what was right and did what I felt he wanted me to do. And he died. For those two years, I couldn't let go of the fact that I had done that to him. The ring reminded me that letting people in only causes pain."

"Kara," he started.

"You don't have to say it, Lee. I know." She shrugged her shoulders. "But seeing you and your father begin to talk again. That was my contrition. I had suffered and I had felt the pain of losing him every night when I closed my eyes and every morning that I woke to find myself alone. And somewhere along the way, mixed in with all the pain and suffering, I formed a family in you and the Old Man. Then, for reasons I still don't understand, I risked it to do what was right. I wasn't selfish for once. And because of that, I knew that no one meant for me to suffer as much as I was."

She shrugged her shoulders at him. "So I found myself wondering if maybe I should just take the ring off and store it away with the other pieces I have of Zak. But then I recognized something. This ring stands for a lot more than just the love he and I had. It's my way of showing the world that I was happy once. And that no matter how many times I screw up, I deserve that. I deserve to be happy. And that's why I still wear it."

She suddenly felt shy at having spoken so candidly and tore her eyes away from him. He hadn't said a word during the last bits of her explanation so she wasn't sure if he even believed her when she said what the ring had become. She found herself wondering when the frak it had become so quiet around her.

Lee's fingers brushed her cheek lightly, and he pulled her chin up so that she could look into his eyes.

"Did anyone ever tell you how beautiful you look in the moonlight?"

Her heart dropped out. She had not expected those words to come from his lips. She had no clue how to respond. Frak, she didn't even know what he had meant by saying she was beautiful.

She lowered her eyes and, stepping back from his touch, pulled the sweater in tight around her. They stood facing one another but not looking at one another, not talking, just being, for what felt like forever.

Finally, she let out a deep breath and glanced over at him. "We should get to bed. You probably have an early start tomorrow morning."

He stared at her a moment before nodding. "You don't mind that I'm taking advantage of your new home?"

She laughed and shook her head at him. "Lee. My home is always open to you. Always."

Pushing open the back door, she took notice of the coffee cups still on the table and the empty bottle of ambrosia. Had they actually finished that up? She couldn't quite remember.

"We should wash these," Lee said, walking over to the table and picking up the cups. "My mother always taught me to leave the house clean before I went to sleep."

Kara nodded and pulled some soap out of a cupboard beneath the sink. "This shouldn't take too long."

"You can tell me all about your business and how well it's doing while we're cleaning," he suggested.

"Did I tell you about the riot I started on Aerilon when I went to deliver a shipment of gimbals for their military Viper maintenance bay?"

"A riot?"

"Yeah. Full scale. It was poetry in motion."

Lee laughed and started washing the first cup as Kara hopped up to sit on the counter. "So what did you do to start a full-scale riot?"

"Well, I simply mentioned that they should be making a little more money for working so hard. You know that Aerilon has one of the largest calls for repairs because they have such a high turn over in pilots. They constantly have nuggets flying their birds, and we all know that usually ends in catastrophe."

"So you suggested they ask for a pay raise? How did that end in a riot?" He held out a towel and one of the clean cups.

Sighing, she began to dry as she continued with her tale. "Well, they seemed to really get what I was trying to tell them. So they decided that they were going to hold my shipment of gimbals hostage until the Aerilon Chancellor agreed to their demands. Turns out that those gimbals were meant to fix the historic Vipers used in the first Cylon War. The ones that Aerilon was giving to the President of the Twelve Colonies as a show of appreciation for helping negotiate the end of the Second Cylon War. So they couldn't exactly wait to fix the planes."

"They sent in the Marines, didn't they?" Lee asked with a laugh as he handed her the second cup. "And we both know how hard it is to stay calm with those goons in the picture."

"Trust me, I know. Because I don't think anyone would have come to blows if the Marines had been a little nicer to me."

"You started the fight."

"Yeah, I kind of did. But you don't understand. They were blaming me for delivering the parts that the maintenance crew was holding ransom. I told them that I just get the orders and fly the goods. I have nothing to do with the items after they're flown to the right coordinates. In fact, I told them to step out of the way so I get my towing Raptor back into the air because I had another shipment to deliver on the planet."

"They didn't get out of your way."

"No, they did not."

"Fraking morons." Lee shook his head and sat down on the table, facing her. "You punched the one blocking your way."

"Yeah, it was a typical Starbuck fight. But the crew had gotten a little attached to me considering I was the first outsider to ever point out the problem that they all knew they had but didn't want to speak up about. So they got offended when the other Marines trained their guns on me."

"Just tell me. No one died, right?"

She smirked. "The only thing to die was the pride of the Marine who got in my way. He got beat down by a handicapped woman. I don't think he's going to be rid of the teasing and taunting for the rest of his career."

"That's what happens when you get in the way of the mighty Starbuck."

She laughed, and they fell into silence as her story was obviously done being told. "You hungry?" she finally asked.

Not waiting for an answer, she got up and started shuffling through the fridge. "I don't have much, but there are some leftovers from the meal Helo made me a few days ago."

"He cooks, too?"

"Let's not get into this again. Helo bails me out because I can't even cook an egg to save my life. He makes me food and I keep my eye out for any supply of his favorite Picon ambrosia." She handed Lee the container and watched as he peeked cautiously under the lid. "It's not going to bite."

Kara glanced at the clock as Lee began to dig into the food in front of him. It was after two in the morning. If Lee wanted to get out of here at a decent hour in order to catch the morning shuttle back to whatever ship he was hitching a ride on back to his base, then he needed to get some sleep starting five minutes ago. But she had already suggested it once. She wasn't about to again.

"Did you hear about the new candidate in the running for a Vice-Presidential nomination?" she asked, knowing that Lee was still an avid follower of the political world. Truthfully, she found it boring. But at this point, she would have said anything to keep him talking. They never had time to just sit in each other's company.

"William Keikeya? Yeah, I've heard about him. He was the old assistant to the Secretary of Education before she died of cancer."

"Yeah. It seems like she must have been a good teacher because a lot of people I talk to on my shipping runs seem to like the kid. I can't believe he's only twenty-five."

"He'd be the youngest Vice-President in history."

"He's cute."

"And what's that supposed to mean?"

"He's cute so he has my vote," she said with a smile. "There are too many long, boring addresses and public appearances for me to have to stare at some old, decrepit man or spinster of a woman. I want something young and attractive to look at."

"I didn't know you liked them so young."

"Eh. I'll take what I can get."

"Word is that he's taken."

"Really? Do you have some juicy gossip?" She gave him a stern look. "Lee Adama, you've been holding out on me!"

He laughed. "Not really. It just so happens that my father still talks with your old Petty Officer from Galactica."

"Dee?" Kara said, her face lighting up. "How the hell is she doing?"

"Quite well it seems. She's engaged to marry the young and attractive Mr. Keikeya."

"Engaged? Dee? No way! The girl has too much fire inside her to let a man tie her down."

Lee let out a laugh. "The same could be said about you. I never could understand why you said yes to Zak when he proposed."

"I was in a good mood," she joked with a shrug of her shoulders. "So, Dee and the future Vice-President? That girl knows how to be in the right place at the right time."

"She knows to follow her heart," Lee said.

Not sure how to take his words, Kara found the kitchen filled with silence again and began to fiddle with the tie to her sweatpants. She couldn't figure out why she couldn't come up with anything else to ask him. When she was writing him letters, they turned into novels in seconds. But now that he's right here in front of her she couldn't think of a thing.

It didn't help that he was staring at her so intently.

Why was he staring at her?

"I like the hair," he said finally, unconsciously answering her question.

She reached up to self-consciously touch her now rather long hair. "I just haven't had time to cut it."

"It suits you." He smiled at her knowingly. "You know, when I pictured you as I was writing my letters, I never saw the shift."

"What shift?"

"You're a lot softer than when you were a pilot. I always had trouble remembering that you were just another one of the guys. Couldn't quite grasp the fact that you were a woman."

"And now?"

He got up to walk over to where she sat perched on the counter and reached out to tug her hair lightly. "Now there's definitely no doubt about it. All woman."

She rolled her eyes. "You are such a charmer."

He smiled widely at her, but he still kept his finger entwined in her hair. "I should probably stop rattling on and let you go get some rest. I'm sure you have shipments to do tomorrow."

At the moment, future shipments were the last thing on her mind. No, she was definitely more focused on the fact that he was biting ever so slightly on his bottom lip. And didn't she just want to know what that it would feel like if she was the one biting on that same spot?

Thoughts like that spelled trouble. Majorly, big trouble.

She slid off the counter and started to walk out of the room, willing her hormones to calm down. "I wish I had a bed to offer you, but there hasn't been time to set up a guest room. And I'm not even sure if I'm ever going to have many guests. There's not many people who I didn't rub the wrong the way."

"The couch will do," Lee said, walking past her and sitting down on the furniture in question.

"Good." She smiled at him from the doorway. "Promise me that you won't just sneak out in the morning."

"I'll say goodbye."

"Not goodbye," she corrected.

"Because I'm not going anywhere. Not really," he said, finishing their little routine.

Kara had refused to say goodbye to him for all the time she had known him. The life of a Viper pilot was so dangerous that she felt like it was asking the gods to take one of their lives. Almost as if they were shouting we wrapped our relationship up all nice and neat so you can just take one of us now and there'll be automatic closure.

She liked things messy. If she lost him or he lost her, she wanted there to be pain and grief. She wanted the bottom to drop out of her world. That's how it was supposed to be when you loved someone as much as she loved him.

She shook her head as she walked up the stairs. Why was she thinking about Lee's death so intently? He was careful. He was a good pilot. He wasn't going to die.

"Yeah. You just keep telling yourself that, Thrace."

After throwing her sweatpants and the sweater Lee had so generously allowed her to keep into a pile on the floor, she pulled the bed covers back and slipped in. The bed enveloped her, and she shut her eyes, willing sleep to come to her.

Thirty minutes later, she was still wide awake. The knowledge that Lee was under the same roof as her, not even a ten second walk away, was not helping. And that damn tension had come back. She wasn't about to give in to her weakness now.

Groaning, she turned over on her back and stared up at the ceiling. She didn't think any of the tricks like counting backwards from one thousand or trying to focus on the noises of the night would work. Normally she would just go down to the kitchen and make herself some sort of drink and just watch the sun come up. But if she did that, she knew that it would wake Lee. And he needed his sleep. He still had a rather dangerous job to do. And she wasn't going to be the one to make him waste his temporary leave.

She sat up with a grumble and grabbed a hair tie off her dresser stand. The long hair might suit her as Lee said, but it just got in the way most of the time. Maybe she would have it chopped off.

A voice in the back of her head nagged that maybe Lee wouldn't think she was so beautiful if she did that.

She ignored it.

Flinging herself back down, she kicked her covers around until they were permanently messed up. She hated when things were neat. Once satisfied, she burrowed herself in deep and pleaded with every ounce of will that she had to stop thinking about her best friend and go to sleep. And that's when she noticed the slight creaking to the house.

She had spent countless nights trying to fall asleep and yet she had never detected the sounds the wind created as it hit the house. It was soothing and completely terrifying at the same time. She found herself wondering if she had locked all the doors before coming to bed. Lee had her so distracted that she wasn't sure.

Granted, it would be easy just to walk downstairs and check. But it had only been about an hour since she had left Lee. He might still be awake.

Gods. Why was she so terrified of being around him all of the sudden?

"Oh that's right," she muttered to herself. "Because lately you seem to have no control over your hormones when he's near."

She flipped over and shut her eyes tightly. She was going to fall asleep if it was the last thing she did. There were ten shipments to go on tomorrow, and she couldn't frak up any of them. They were for a new and particularly influential client. Maybe she should hire another pilot to help her on these important flights that she didn't trust to her normal crew. There was probably someone from Galactica that would like a nice, comfy job like hers.

The next thing she felt was a slight tap on her shoulder. Automatically, she flung her hand out and made contact with whoever was in her house and had taken it upon themselves to enter her bedroom.

"Jesus, Kara," Lee hissed, holding his jaw and taking a seat on the bed.

"Lee!" She sprung up to sit on her feet and reached out to touch where the skin was already swelling. "Oh gods. I'm sorry. I'm not used to having people in this house with me at night. And you scared me. What the frak are you doing in my room anyway?"

He glared at her. "The heat's not working, and it's really cold down there."

"Fraking Kellerman! That bastard told me he had gotten it fixed. I am going to kill him. I am going to rip his cheating little eyes from his head. And you better believe that when I'm done, children won't be an option anymore."

"All right. Glad to see some things never change with you. The only problem is I'm still shivering on the couch."

Sighing and knowing it was probably a horrible mistake, she scooted over to the other side of the bed. "Get in. My covers are better than the Galactica-issued heat maintaining blankets. They're the only thing that got me warm after all my time in space."

"Thanks." Lee lied down on his back next to her and shut his eyes. "I'll try to be invisible."

"It's not like I've never had to share a bed with someone before," she joked. Then she scolded herself for bringing up that damn touchy subject again.

"But I'm sure it'll be hard to share a bed with a person in addition to keeping your hands off of them." He let out a small chuckle, and she glanced over to see him still talking with his eyes shut. "Though I know it will be twice as hard because it's me."

If he only knew.

"I'm tired. Shut up and let me sleep," she growled, opting for agitation to mask the fight within her to keep her impulses checked.

Lee nodded and rolled over onto his side, facing opposite her.

After ten minutes, it had finally seemed like he had settled in on his half of the bed. And now she could finally try to stop dwelling on the fact that Lee was no more than an arm's length away from her in the bed. Her mind had leapt right to the idea of what she could be doing with him if she just had the courage to throw caution to the wind.

Okay. That wasn't the way to go if she wanted to stop obsessing over the current situation and actually fall asleep.

It also didn't help that her mind kept pointing out the small detail that when he had come into her room before, he hadn't really been wearing much clothing. She had always been annoyed by Lee's habit of sleeping in his boxers no matter the weather, but this particular night it was downright infuriating. In quite a few ways, actually.

Sighing, she turned her back to him and stared at the small paint chip in the wall as she tried to calm down her hormones. Eventually, the rather inventive ideas of what she could do to him dwindled down to only one or two particularly wicked scenarios. She could actually feel herself beginning to fall asleep again.

Of course, that was the moment he chose to turn and shift himself so that his arm draped over her waist.

Her eyes flew open and she could feel her body tense completely. Even while every nerve ending she seemingly had dwelled on his touch, her mind kept insisting that at least there's still space between them. She could handle this. She knew she could. If only those nasty thoughts weren't coming back.

The pressure of his hand increased as it slowly slid down to where her body met the bed. She held back a gasp as his grip tightened and he pulled her in close to his body. She could feel his breath on the back of her neck. And the heater must have finally started working because she was definitely warm.

She felt the stubble on his chin that he had so stubbornly refused to get rid of. Suddenly she understood that there are other benefits to it than just putting the scum he had to beat information out of more at ease. She bit back a moan. This was trouble if him just holding her close was getting her this worked up.

His hand started to make lazy circles against her stomach, and she had to resort to biting her lip to keep from making any sound. Obviously, he was sleeping rather soundly.

She felt herself wanting to shift so that she could see his face. The few days she had spent with him while he was on Galactica for the decommissioning ceremony and during the time it took them to beat down the first wave of Cylons had given her a glimpse of what Lee was like when he wasn't awake and guarded. He had been moved from bunk to bunk seeing as how he was only a temporary addition to Galactica. On the nights he had been given the bunk that was directly across from her, she had sacrificed her own chance to sleep to stare at him. She had to confirm that he was actually there, sleeping beside her.

As cliché as it sounded, he looked peaceful when he slept. She guessed that was the reason why she finally decided to admit her part in Zak's death. She wanted to fix it so that he was peaceful while he was awake, too. It seemed like the least she could do for him.

His hand stopped its motion but still held on tight to her body, and she felt herself pulled back into her present situation. Gods. She really wanted to look at him.

She would just twist slightly for a quick look, and then, when satisfied, she could try to go to sleep once more. She bit her lip again, this time in nervousness, and turned her head. What she saw made her stomach drop out.

Lee wasn't sleeping.

Instead he was staring at her wide-eyed, looking particularly guilty. However, he wasn't moving his hand. She didn't have a fraking clue why that suddenly seemed important.

"Hi," she whispered.

"Hi."

"I thought you were asleep."

He simply shrugged his shoulders at her in typical Lee style. When he didn't know what to say, he didn't say anything at all.

They continued to stare at each other for a few moments. She saw a flicker of something in his eye that made her want to run as far as she could and pull herself in closer at the exact same time. Instead of following either impulse, she struggled to find her voice. "Lee?"

She saw his eyes glaze over at the sound of her gravely voice, and she silently cursed herself for not trying to get rid of the sleepiness in it. She knew from previous experiences that it was the kind of thing that drove guys crazy. She guessed even the one guy she couldn't have was susceptible to it.

And then something shifted in his face. He pulled her in so that she faced him with her whole body and his hand rested firmly on her back.

"What are you doing?" she asked hesitantly.

He paused for a moment before answering honestly. "I'm not sure."

"Oh."

"You're soft," he said as a way of explanation.

"Oh."

"And warm."

"Oh."

She reached out and touched his face gently with her fingertips. When the corners of his mouth turned up in a small smile, she felt the need to explain. "You're warm, too."

"Okay," he said with a smirk.

"And I just wanted to make sure this was real."

"You dream about me in your bed often enough to get confused about reality and fantasy?" he whispered softly.

Suddenly she was glad that it was a dark night. He wouldn't see her blush that way.

This had to end before it went too far. "I think the heat's back on," she pointed out. "I'm burning up."

"It's not back on."

The silent implication of his statement made her thank the gods that it was dark for the second time that minute. Why wasn't she pulling herself away from him?

The answer was simple, really. She didn't want to.

But that didn't explain why he had her in his arms to begin with.

Again, she found herself staring at him and was surprised to see the very thing she had always wanted for him. There was a feeling of peace in the way he was looking at her. It was something she had never seen him have before when he was awake. It looked like he had finally found it.

"Kara?"

His words broke her out of her trance. "Hmm?"

"I'm sorry."

She could feel his hand begin to rub the small of her back lightly. Trying to ignore it, she swallowed and gave him a smile. "It's all right, Lee. I understand. It has to be hard out there, constantly on the move, having no place to settle for more than a night. It only makes sense that you would want to be close to the first warm body you've had a chance to be with in quite a while. I understand."

He shook his head, and she found herself biting down on her lip again. This time she wasn't sure if it was to hold in the nervousness or the moan that was still on the tip of her tongue.

"No. That I'm not sorry for."

"Then what?"

"I'm sorry for fraking everything up between us."

"You haven't," she insisted.

"I'm about to."

Her heart froze as well as every other part of her body at the sight of the slight smirk on his face. Before she had time to register what had just shifted between them, he leaned down to nuzzle the side of her neck softly. After a moment, she felt his tongue dart out to tickle her slightly.

"You taste just like I always imagined," he whispered against her skin.

"And have you imagined it often?" she said, biting her lip as his hands let go of her back and worked their way around to rest on her abdomen. She suddenly was self-conscious of the fact that she had gone to bed in just a shirt. There really wasn't that much clothing between the two of them.

"Too many times to count," he said, looking at her sleepy eyed. He waited for a moment before placing a small, light kiss on the tip of her nose. It was such a sweet gesture that she suddenly wasn't sure if this was real no matter how solid he felt in the bed next to her.

Had anything that went on that day actually occurred? Was Lee even really here?

Kara didn't get a chance to figure out an answer to that question as she felt him press his lips to hers. She let him take control as he tasted her. She found herself wondering what he thought she tasted like. She knew for certain what he tasted like. Sandalwood. Sweat. And just a little hint of vanilla.

She had found that out for herself when she had kissed him that one time in Academy. Throughout the years, she found herself wondering if she had been right about the utter maleness that was the taste of him. And it seemed like she was about to get her answer.

"What are we doing, Lee?" she asked, pulling back from him slightly but still keeping her hands tentatively on his arms. She knew the right thing to do was question what was happening, but that didn't mean she necessarily wanted to stop it. There was a definitive battle going on between her id and superego right now.

Drives versus morals.

Somehow she felt that her drive to be close to Lee was going to win out.

"I still don't know," he said, finally answering her question. "All I know is that you're too far away for my liking." His hands gripped her hips roughly and pulled her right up against him. She could feel the hardness of him against her, and it made her want to let out a sigh. She had always imagined that it would feel right to be this close to Lee. It was nice to know that was another thing she had always thought which turned out to be right.

She let herself shift her hips to grind against him slightly in a move that was so simple and made him groan ever so slightly. She knew her encouragement of what they were on their way to doing was not the right thing for her to do. But that didn't stop her.

She saw his eyes flicker with something. Was that desire? And the next thing she knew his lips were on her lips and his hands had worked their way up to cup her breasts and all coherent thought she had had only moments before disappeared.

The kiss combined with the sensations of his hands on her was unbelievable. It didn't have the timidness of before. It was hot, bordering on carnal. And she felt like she was going to explode. She had been holding this in for too long.

"Lee," she whispered. She had intended for it to come out like a request for him to slow down, but she wasn't all that surprised to hear it actually sound more like begging.

"Whatever you're going to say, Kara, I don't care. I don't care if this is wrong. I don't care." He touched the side of her cheek lightly. "I am going to go insane if I can't have you."