Author's note: au menu, today: Fried has a weakness and an evil friend :P 2nd story about bixlow, lol, he inspire me these days :3 as usual, my name is not Mashima so Fairy Tail is not mine

His weakness

Even thought Fairy Tail had a private pool in their guild, nothing could replace a good old trip to the beach. The sun, the waves and the girls in bikini, it was an event that no one wanted to miss.

It was by a sunny afternoon that the whole gang enjoyed a day near the ocean. A lot of activities were happening, here and there. There was a huge barbecue giving off a delicious smell, with cool drinks and alcohol served with the meal, beside a group playing wack-a-melon. In the water, some people were surfing and splashing while, on the ground, a group was making a sand castle while others were sunbathing.

Everyone was having fun except one person. Sitting under a beach umbrella, a certain young man was not feeling well. Fried Justine could feel the beads of sweat rolling along his spine and it wasn't because of the heat. He couldn't rest his eyes anywhere around him without seeing them.

Women. In serious state of undress.

If he looked toward the barbecue, he could spot Cana having a drink with the Master, Macao and Bixlow, the card mage was only wearing a bikini top and extremely short shorts that did nothing to hide her curves.

Switching his gaze toward the group playing wack-a-melon, he didn't have more luck since right as he laid eyes on the group, Lucy, who was holding the bat, hit the fruit with enough force to send pink bits everywhere and especially on her not-covered-enough chest. Visca was congratulating her, her body also in a similar state of juicy dripping.

Shivering at the view, the rune mage turned his body in another direction, hoping to get a rest from all the disturbing images his brain was being attacked with. He was already regretting coming along and it wasn't even past 2pm.

Fried turned his attention toward the ocean and sighed in relief. He saw Gray surfing on a ice surfboard while being cheered on by some other guys. So far, the scene looked harmless.

The man even allowed himself a chuckle when he saw that Natsu was throwing fireballs at the ice mage to make him fall off his board. That was when a huge wave raised and crashed on the fire dragonslayer, rode by an enraged Juvia, the tide washing up a good number of the people that were watching from the shore.

However, the green-haired man choke on his saliva when a female creature emerged from the pile of wet people, her red hair swiping in the wind and her eyes blazing in fury. Erza, wearing some kind of scandalously revealing piece of clothing as an armor, sent Gray and Natsu flying with two good hits of a huge club.

He wasn't fast enough to avoid witnessing Titania's assets bouncing when she punished them and that simple action sent him feeling weak from everywhere. Suppressing a spasm, the rune mage placed one of his hand near his head to blind his eyes from that malevolent source of uneasiness. This trip really was a bad idea!

Shouts from his left side got his attention. On the beach, there was a huge pile of sand being shaped into some kind of castle and around it, half a dozen people were working to make it look like something. Fried recognized Elfman and Wendy making a tower of sand while the males of team shadowgear were raising walls. The female member came toward them with a little bucket full of pebbles and seashells, to the wind dragonslayer's delight.

Since the little wind mage was too young to be of any interest and the blue-haired woman was wearing a decent two piece swimsuit, the man felt his heartbeat slow down at a reasonable pace. Maybe he would be able to relax and have a good time...

The peace didn't last long enough. Like a curse, it was of course at this precise time that the ground shook slightly and a cute mole emerged from the sand, right in front of the castle. The creature shape-shifted into a white-haired teenager who exposed her female curves to the world, her bikini leaving way not enough to the imagination. It didn't help the poor rune mage that Lisanna, covered in sand, had to bend down to brush every part of her body into cleanliness, especially her long legs, right in front of him.

Fried couldn't hold the squeak that escaped his throat and fell on his side, shaking. His nerves couldn't take more of all this female sex-appeal and he knew that his heart was on the verge of a stroke, he just knew it! The universe was out to kill him!

" Fried? Are you alright?"

The green-haired man opened his eyes at the sound of the sweet voice. A person was in front of him, a halo of light illuminating her floating white hair and he immediately recognized Mirajane.

The woman knelt beside the rune mage, her face full of concern.

" You seem to be struggling since you sat there, are you in pain?"

Fried was unable to answer anything: Mirajane was only clad in a bikini that suited perfectly her generous chest. The view was too overwhelming for him, it may be something to see it from afar but this close, it was spelling his death. He could clearly hear each beating of his blood-pumping organ in his ears, his skin felt like he had jumped in the ocean so much it was humid and his whole body was helplessly shaking.

As he was feeling himself close to fainting, Fried clearly heard a resounding laugh calling the barmaid:

" Hey, Mira! He'll feel better if ya give him a hug!"

The woman looked over her shoulder at Bixlow's grinning face:

" Is that so? Alright!"

The rune mage went rigid as a plank when he felt Mirajane's body pressing against his, his head rolling backward and his vision fading. He managed to croak a weak I hate you... Bixlow... before blacking out in the barmaid's arms.

Near the barbecue, the seidr mage was laughing his butt off at his friend misfortune. Beside him, Cana was also snickering at the vision of a fainted Fried being shaken by a concerned Mirajane.

" You're so evil."

" I know."

End notes: aawww i luv Fried but it was too good to not exploit it :D thx for the reviews/faves and such